how to get her to exercise?

so all i heard for months was how bad my gf wanted a treadmill so with her income tax money we got a used one and the first two days she used it but now she has not used it anymore, I have used it and really enjoy using it But She really needs to use it also, she has more weight to lose then I do . I am happy that I have lost weight but so far shes not lost any. we also have a wii and wii fit and do that mostly to check our weights. Today I am down to 218.5 I am so happy about being below 220 hope I can keep it off.
how do you guys get your mate to use work out equipment I really like to see her loose some weight it be lot better for her health if she does.thanks
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Replies

  • demorelli
    demorelli Posts: 508 Member
    Dance Dance Revolution!! It's great for getting you moving and burning calories without realizing it because you're having too much fun. You can get it for several game systems and buy a mat with it (or two mats). Last I checked Gamestop makes a dance mat controller that is compatable with multiple systems.
  • MyChocolateDiet
    MyChocolateDiet Posts: 22,281 Member
    i personally would not try to make anyone do anything they didnt want to do. you have no idea why she isnt' doing it. could be anything from blisters to TOM to thong rash she didn't expect and waiting to afford workout clothes to headaches to any number of unmentionable things. leave her alone. focus on yourself. lead by example.
  • xbeth77x
    xbeth77x Posts: 80 Member
    No offense, you don't look 118.5...
  • mlb929
    mlb929 Posts: 1,974 Member
    It's sweet that you want to encourage her. But it's her decision not yours. The best you can do is lead by example. My DH is not unfit, but he won't exercise for the life of him, he has sleep apnea, gout, and high blood pressure. He just went through a skin cancer removal, and has aches and pains. I really desire for him to take better care of himself, but I don't find it's my battle to fight. He knows that my fitness is very important to me, the kids and I are very very active. But until he has his own reason, in his own mind, he will not change for anyone but himself.

    Best of luck and keep up the good work .
  • CrazyTrackLady
    CrazyTrackLady Posts: 1,337 Member
    i personally would not try to make anyone do anything they didnt want to do. you have no idea why she isnt' doing it. could be anything from blisters to TOM to thong rash she didn't expect and waiting to afford workout clothes to headaches to any number of unmentionable things. leave her alone. focus on yourself. lead by example.

    ^^^This. And while you're at it, stop with all the reminders that she needs to start exercising. All she is hearing in her head is your nagging, judgmental voice. She has to come to this realization on her own.

    PS: thong rash???
  • 10kaday
    10kaday Posts: 177
    Trying to bring it up with words doesn't really work. I tried with my wife and it just makes her mad. It's up to her to make the decision if she wants to incorporate fitness into her life. They know the benefits. We all do. But it's easier said than done.
  • LittleMissDover
    LittleMissDover Posts: 820 Member
    You can't. She will (or won't) do it when she's ready and not before. You going on at her will just make her either feel like digging her heels in and stuffing her face with pizza on the sofa just to prove you can't tell her what to do (this would be me) or she's going to get a complex that you don't love her as she is.

    You concentrate on your journey and let her concentrate on hers, whatever that may be.
  • jenlarz
    jenlarz Posts: 813 Member
    No offense, you don't look 118.5...

    It says below 220 in the next sentence, so probably he meant to write 218.5.
  • Contrarian
    Contrarian Posts: 8,138 Member
    Tell her she's fat.
  • stackhsc
    stackhsc Posts: 439 Member
    Three things that i can almost guarantee you

    1) you cant

    2) you dont want to, unless she does it for her it most likely with fall of the rails at some point.

    3) she will do it if and when she wants to, as the others have said leading by example and staying positive is your best bet.

    On the upside, you got a treadmill to use.... more or less why i have one too . Get some good tunes and keep yourself challenged by making it harder on yourself all the time. increasing speeds, doing intervals, anything to keep striving forward.

    Good luck,
  • stackhsc
    stackhsc Posts: 439 Member
    Tell her she's fat.

    LOL, that would probably eliminate the girlfriend part of the equation
  • rduhlir
    rduhlir Posts: 3,550 Member
    My husband and I both got gym memberships about 3 weeks ago. When we got it he swore up and down that he would use it, that he wasn't getting it because I was getting it. To date he has used the gym maybe a total of 3 times. He says every night, "I am going to get up in the morning and go." Later that day he when I call...he hasn't gone.

    While I encourage him to go quite often, he often times is "too tired" or "didn't get up early enough". But, you can't force them. The biggest motivator is going to be seeing you get smaller and smaller. At least this is what I keep getting told. We will see if it happens lol...
  • MelsAuntie
    MelsAuntie Posts: 2,833 Member
    If you are male and weigh 118.5 you're a walking skeleton! That can't be right.....not unless you're a hobbit.
  • ChrisinGA
    ChrisinGA Posts: 116 Member
    No offense, you don't look 118.5...

    It says below 220 in the next sentence, so probably he meant to write 218.5.

    yeah I hit the wrong number when entering today's weight. I didn't realize it for like 5 minutes LOL
    Well We both need to be more healthier I have type 2 diabetics and high blood pressure, And I do not want to have either at age 33 anymore.
    Don't worry I will keep moving forward using it and loosing weight but just wish she would also follow me with it, as said she really needs to I know she would feel better if she lost even 20 pounds

    I didn't think I would get so much negative input here I was really hoping to hear some success of getting your mate to join you in exercise.
    the DDR thing yeah I used to play that with a friend but she would never play with us.
  • ChrisinGA
    ChrisinGA Posts: 116 Member
    If you are male and weigh 118.5 you're a walking skeleton! That can't be right.....not unless you're a hobbit.
    typo
    218 I have not been 118 since elm school lol
  • n_rockey
    n_rockey Posts: 52 Member
    You probably can't get her to use the treadmill unless she wants to. I thought I would love mine too, but my hubby uses it WAY more than me. I just get bored walking in place for very long- even with the TV right there. It's not that I never use it, but it's just not what I thought it would be. What you might be able to do is suggest that you go take a walk together- either outside or at a mall or some indoor venue depending on the weather. There's a beautiful nature center and a couple of parks with walking paths within a mile or two of my house, and when the weather gets nice my family will spend hours walking outside and enjoying it. Another thought is suggesting some other forms of exercise. I'm partial to the Just Dance Wii games. It's not at all unusual during the winter for my husband to be on the treadmill downstairs while I'm upstairs dancing (or making a fool of myself, but hey, I'm sweating and having fun, so who cares). She just needs to find an activity she likes, because if she doesn't like it she won't stick to it.
  • make it romantic and take nice long walks or plan a date at the park! ask her if she wants to be your walking buddy since it's lonely :] be super cheesy about it too!
  • theCarlton
    theCarlton Posts: 1,344 Member
    Reverse psychology. Tell her she's not allowed to use the treadmill under any circumstances. Give her what she paid for it, and tell her to step off. :wink:
  • c_faulkenburg
    c_faulkenburg Posts: 158 Member
    This isn't about getting fit and losing weight, although that is a huge part of it. This is about making a lifestyle change. When I met my husband I was at my lowest weight. I gained a good bit after we were married and then had three children in 4 years and while I didn't pack on the pounds with each pregnancy, I didn't exactly care what I ate. Flash forward to 2013, and we decided that we were going to get fit together. Thus far I have lost thirteen pounds, I log in to MFP every day, and I am generally trying to make better choices. He might make it once a week. I honestly think that he's not ready to make the change. All I can do is stand by and hope that he sees positive changes in me and eventually that he'll make those himself. But I'm not holding my breath.
  • snowflakeheather
    snowflakeheather Posts: 37 Member
    Yaaay you for working on getting healthy. From someone who has a lot of weight to lose, I know I just had to do it in my own time. My husband was a great support. He never ever made comments about my weight or asked me to work out. I really appreciated that. Now that I'm ready, I find that when he notices what I'm doing right and encourages me in those areas, it helps me want to keep on that track. He's done things like thanking me for making such a healthy dinner and saying things like "wow....good for you for getting up early to work out this morning". He doesn't bring home junk food. When he wants to buy me a "treat" he brings me flowers, a diet coke (my favourite and only soda that I drink and I don't buy it for myself), or even a "fudge bar" from Dairy Queen (which is a low calorie treat). Just be encouraging and lead by example. Does she like to go for walks or swimming? Go together. Is she open to talking about her feelings? If so, ask her how she'd like to you support her and the types of encouragement she's love. My husband couldn't inspire me to start this journey.....it had to be on my own time.....but he's been my biggest encourager and supporter ever!
  • RobinV_Seattle
    RobinV_Seattle Posts: 191 Member
    How about you take the treadmill out of the equation and just start coming up with some healthy activities for you both to do together? Then you get some quality time and you both get exercise and start making changes toward a healthier lifestyle.

    For instance, take a walk each night after dinner - talk about your day
    Wii tournaments
    Dance lessons - they're on Groupon all the time here
    Miniature golf
    Bowlihg - stay away from the bowling alley food though, lol!
    Paddle boat
    Have a super soaker war or go play paint ball
    Find a charity you support and walk it's 5k together - you'll get t-shirts, lol!
    Bicycling
    Go on one of those city scavenger hunts
    Go to the zoo

    Make it a date, make it healthy-ish, and you both benefit!
  • stackhsc
    stackhsc Posts: 439 Member
    I didn't think I would get so much negative input here I was really hoping to hear some success of getting your mate to join you in exercise.

    i dont think its necesarily meant as negative. there is nothing wrong with wanting her to be healthy but likely most people on here at one time of another, probably even yourself, have had someone try to make them do something, probably even had someone try to make them get healthier or loose weight and that is a sensitive area.
    if i am one of the ones your felt negativity from it wasnt my intention. I have also tried to get my spouse to get on board over the last 4 years (well not over the last few years as i learned..slow learner lol) and it never goes well or ended well so i was trying to share my experience to save you the grief.
  • DavPul
    DavPul Posts: 61,406 Member
    Start dating a thinner chick til she gets the message
  • ChrisinGA
    ChrisinGA Posts: 116 Member
    Thanks everyone, as far as going out to do things, we live in the Country, not much to do here, right now were both out of work and really depressed i know i eat lots when I'm depressed she does to but really trying to loose weight still. so the treadmill is paid for and Im going to get her money out of it at least. Maybe she will start wanting to work out, just really erks me that she said forever she wanted one all i heard for weeks then we get one and doesn't use it kinda like Zumba for the Wii wanted forever and I spent 45.00 on it then she used it like twice.
  • Xiaolongbao
    Xiaolongbao Posts: 854 Member
    Thanks everyone, as far as going out to do things, we live in the Country, not much to do here,

    Walking is free.
  • chellebublz
    chellebublz Posts: 568 Member
    You can't, she has to do it for herself, not for you. I've encouraged my fiance for months now, showed him what I'm doing, asked him to try it, etc. But I realize he has to want to. He talks like he wants to and acts like he wants to but the motivation isn't there. It's starting to, we bought an Xbox with Kinect with our tax refund and he is starting to do my Nike Plus Training workout programs, and the fact that you get an achievement for doing the program without missing a session has him motivated to do it. The trick is to find a way to make it her idea, and then she will be all over it.
  • LeonnieH
    LeonnieH Posts: 209 Member
    Why don't you both do the couch to 5k running programme together. Book a 5k race/fun run for a couple months time and work towards running it together. She may be more motivated to use the treadmill if she has a training plan and an event/deadline to work towards. A 5k fun run can be done with a combination of walking and running so not a lot of pressure, my first 5k I didn't run the whole thing, I walked part of it.
  • Markguns
    Markguns Posts: 554 Member
    Get a Credit card. Put it on a string at the end of a pole ...just out of reach of the treadmill. :laugh: If you're treadmill is in the house walk and watch your favorite TV show, simple.. You don't have to start out making it hard. If she wont come along for the ride start it by yourself, after a month or two hopefully she wont want to be left behind. Bottom line is, you have to want to do it, you have to want to help yourself. It's like quitting cigarettes, 80% mental, you just have to start and stick with it! Eventually you will wonder what took you so long. The Tortoise and the Hare, baby steps. :bigsmile:
  • chellebublz
    chellebublz Posts: 568 Member
    I definitely support what Leonnie said. Look and see if the Color Run is going to be in your area this summer. It's a walk/run, either is acceptable, it's not timed, its just a fun run that they throw color chalk or whatever on you at certain markers. My fiance and I are doing it this summer, I'm hoping to be able to run it by then :)
  • CrazyTrackLady
    CrazyTrackLady Posts: 1,337 Member
    Thanks everyone, as far as going out to do things, we live in the Country, not much to do here,

    Walking is free.

    I wholly agree with the above statement! My word, living in the country would be my exercise paradise! I'd be climbing trees, running through fields, lifting heavy farm equipment (hay bales?), mucking stalls, etc. The WORLD can be our playground if we want it to be.

    I lost 50 lbs just walking my dog around my neighborhood - plain ol' suburbia USA. I don't need a fancy gym membership to motivate me. I use what's out there or what I have in the house.