Being asked how much weight you've lost

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Replies

  • Umeboshi
    Umeboshi Posts: 1,637 Member
    Any unsolicited comments on weight or size are rude.
  • wolfchild59
    wolfchild59 Posts: 2,608 Member
    I've never thought it was a rude question. As long as they aren't asking my current weight, and just the actual pounds lost, I'm always happy and proud to tell them how how much. I worked hard to reach whatever number it was at that moment in time and I liked the recognition of the work I'd done.
  • agoofynut
    agoofynut Posts: 101 Member
    I get asked all the time. I find it awkward when they weigh about what I've lost. I also don't like that it's obvious that I still have a lot to lose and I've already lost a whole person. I'm sure they are dying to know what my starting weight was to have lost so much and still be so overweight, but no one's been bold enough to ask that yet.
  • allifantastical
    allifantastical Posts: 946 Member
    I wanted to add, some people ask about my weight loss because they are just generally interested and they care about my well being, but most ask because they want to start losing weight and want to know what I'm doing etc.
  • doubleduofa
    doubleduofa Posts: 284 Member
    I get a little embarassed because I'm not yet where I want to be and feel uncomfortable "bragging" about any weight lost. I know logically that I'm not bragging, but since I am shy and generally like to go unnoticed, it feels like I am. I mostly hate talking about me.

    Than being said, I do recognize that it is a nice compliment. It has taken a lot of work and habit-changing for me to do this and it is nice that people notice. If I notice that people have lost weight or look nice in an outfit, I will tell them so, because I think it is a nice thing to do. I think the "how much?" question is just natural conversation and not offensive.
  • Duck_Puddle
    Duck_Puddle Posts: 3,237 Member
    I don't care when people ask-that's fine. But when I tell them and they start arguing with me that it's "really that much? I would have guessed 35"...well then I guess you suck at guessing and thanks for belittling the 40 lbs I lost that you didn't "guess" I had. And this is exactly why people just don't say anything at all.
  • KenosFeoh
    KenosFeoh Posts: 1,837 Member
    Last time someone asked, I said "I have no idea," which is always true, given how weight fluctuates up and down throughout the day.
  • KaunisPerhonen
    KaunisPerhonen Posts: 8 Member
    The question doesn't really bother me, I've had people at work recently ask me if I've lost any weight and I think that bothers me more than anything. I haven't made it that far yet, but they know about my efforts. I don't mind telling people how much I've lost, but I feel like if they act like it's a crazy number I would get a bit annoyed. I told two of the girls I work with that I've lost 12 pounds already and they both just looked and me and were like "seriously" I'm not sure if that's a wow that's good kind of seriously or a I can't tell at all, are you sure you've lost weight kind of seriously. But it really doesn't matter what they think anyway, just what I do :)
  • sierra_12
    sierra_12 Posts: 249 Member
    i take it as a great compliment! i never find anyone asking me how much I've lost as rude, especially since it is usually following "oh my gosh! you look great!" obviously they think I look good, so i take it as a compliment and proudly tell them how much the scale has dropped. after all, ive literally worked my butt of to get to where i am now, why not brag a little when i get the opportunity to? (:
  • deb3129
    deb3129 Posts: 1,294 Member
    I get asked that question a LOT. While I don't think it is rude for them to ask, and it is a natural question that most people have when they see you have lost weight, especially if it is a lot, it still makes me uncomfortable. I do answer honestly, but it is a little embarassing that I have lost an entire person, and still have a way to go! I don't mind posting it on here, because that is what this forum is for. But for the people in my every day life, it is embarassing to tell them! Most of them do not have weight issues, or not as severe as I have had, and cannot begin to understand!
  • Wrenbot87
    Wrenbot87 Posts: 100 Member
    I always say how much I've lost, but not how much I weigh. I don't feel as strange admitting to the pounds that come off as I do the pounds that are still hanging around lol!
  • pfgaytriot
    pfgaytriot Posts: 238 Member
    I've spoken to people about my weight loss more than I ever imagined I would. It's always odd, but IMO I don't think asking how much weight you've lost is rude, especially if it's a considerable amount. I feel like it's to be expected. While it's odd to hear, I'm usually very happy that people notice the difference.
  • I don't mind. Asking "How much?" is kind of weird in my opinion, but I wouldn't be offended.

    Something that DOES bother me, as someone who has lost 70 pounds in the past: "Don't lose anymore, Sweetie! You are thin enough!"
  • bluefish49
    bluefish49 Posts: 102 Member
    I posted this on a similar thread a little while ago, but it is more pertinant to this thread. Now its a joke with some people "2 Pounds!"

    I have lost a visibly significant amount of weight. But over the course as I lost more and more, people who would NEVER interact with me would all of a sudden want to talk with me - about my weight. With the most frequent question being "How much have you lost?" Not a compliment that I look good, but just an inquiry as to the number of pounds. The second question would then be "How are you doing it", i.e. wanting to know what kind of surgery I had.

    I got tired of fulfilling these people's need to know a number. So, my standard answer has become "2 pounds". I usually get a real confused look and a "Nawwwww, you've lost more than that!" and then I reply "I've only lost 2 pounds. Don't know where they went. The rest of them - I know exactly where I left them - at the gym."

    I don't want to feel like a walking lottery billboard with a number tatooed on my forehead. Here on MFP it is different. I am proud of my (as of this writing) 126 and have that on my ticker. And actually, I am down 167 from my all-time high many years ago, but the 126 come from a point where I started in earnest two years ago with only one hiccup.

    Moral of the story - if you've walked by me in the hall for the last ten years and never made eye contact with me once, my "number" should not be the first topic you want to converse with me about.
  • BlackKat75
    BlackKat75 Posts: 210 Member
    I posted this on a similar thread a little while ago, but it is more pertinant to this thread. Now its a joke with some people "2 Pounds!"

    I have lost a visibly significant amount of weight. But over the course as I lost more and more, people who would NEVER interact with me would all of a sudden want to talk with me - about my weight. With the most frequent question being "How much have you lost?" Not a compliment that I look good, but just an inquiry as to the number of pounds. The second question would then be "How are you doing it", i.e. wanting to know what kind of surgery I had.

    I got tired of fulfilling these people's need to know a number. So, my standard answer has become "2 pounds". I usually get a real confused look and a "Nawwwww, you've lost more than that!" and then I reply "I've only lost 2 pounds. Don't know where they went. The rest of them - I know exactly where I left them - at the gym."

    I don't want to feel like a walking lottery billboard with a number tatooed on my forehead. Here on MFP it is different. I am proud of my (as of this writing) 126 and have that on my ticker. And actually, I am down 167 from my all-time high many years ago, but the 126 come from a point where I started in earnest two years ago with only one hiccup.

    Moral of the story - if you've walked by me in the hall for the last ten years and never made eye contact with me once, my "number" should not be the first topic you want to converse with me about.


    ^^^^I love all of this with my whole heart.
  • elisa123gal
    elisa123gal Posts: 4,324 Member
    that is because she is fishing for gossip..she doesn't truly care about you. I hate elevator gossips.. collecting tidbits of info so they can mention it as you walk away from a group. Your instincts are right on. It is your information to share if you wish..and it is rude of someone who is not close to you to ask.

    Congrats on your hard work..
  • celebrity328
    celebrity328 Posts: 377 Member
    It really depends on the person asking :)

    At my job the number is 20 but people who have known me for years and knew me at my biggest the number is 93 :) I will get different reactions from different people, some say I should stop others say Im doing a great job. I dont think its rude really I just dont think coworkers should really be asking me about why my pants are falling off my *kitten*, why my shirts are to large, or if im sick!

    This last month I lost almost 10lbs and you could really tell.. well the comments from coworkers were just down right mean at times. I finally made it known that I am 30lbs still overweight and nothing they say was going to make me stop, so to please stop bring my weight up and carry on.
  • steelyjoe22
    steelyjoe22 Posts: 40 Member
    For the first time in my life, I'm not ashamed to tell people my exact weight. When I started this journey, I was embarrassed about being ~290 lbs.

    That said, when people ask, I usually tell them, with the caveat "I still have a ways to go." Some people tell me no, I don't, I look great now . . . I think they mean this to be kind and supportive, but the reality is that it's simply not true - I'm still overweight. I try to not think about their "encouragement" too much, because I don't want to become complacent and stop working hard.

    I also find it funny when people ask what I do, and I tell them "diet and exercise." They're frequently disappointed by this response - I guess people want an easy way out?

    Or, sometimes to make people uncomfortable, I tell them "Cocaine and bulimia." My HR manager wasn't sure whether to take me seriously.
  • CottonCandyKisses
    CottonCandyKisses Posts: 246 Member
    I don't tell people. I will just say I've lost a few pounds if they ask. Especially after yesterday when someone I haven't seen in awhile asked me what size I was(after commented how small I'd gotten), then proceeded to tell me that I looked sickly and ill! Keep them guessing I say.
  • supah_
    supah_ Posts: 78 Member
    I was just in the elevator with someone I work with on an infrequent basis. She commented on my weight loss, which I took as a nice compliment, but then she followed it up with "so, how many pounds have you lost?" Rude or not? I mean, I broadcast that number on my ticker here on the site, so it's not like it's kept under wraps, but it did kind of take me by surprise to be asked so directly.
    I think her question was on the rude side. It's ok when close friends ask, but if you hardly know her ... it's not any of her business.

    someone just asked me a trade secret about my (art) work on facebook - they asked "What model printer is that?" my response, was "Super!" Copycat people in the art making world is an issue.

    I would have said "thousands" to the elevator lady.
  • MissFuchsia
    MissFuchsia Posts: 523 Member
    I never tell people in real life how much I've lost. I think it's really rude when people ask. Sometimes I will say how many clothes sizes I've dropped.
  • shanander
    shanander Posts: 50 Member
    I never thought of it as rude. IMO, losing weight is not usually easy so you should get to brag a bit. It will usually lead into a conversation on what you are doing to lose and hopefully motivate someone else that they can make changes to lose as well. I know it is encouraging to me to hear how much people lose and love to know their tricks!
  • MrsWibbly
    MrsWibbly Posts: 415 Member
    Take it as a combination of a compliment and a touch of jealousy! You obvious look like you have lost and if you tell them, you will probably find they will follow up their initial question with a 'wow thats awesome!' or similar. Be proud of your achievement!

    (and if they react negatively then it was probably more jealousy than anything else so you can just pity them and walk away with your head held high!)
  • beattie1
    beattie1 Posts: 1,012 Member
    It's normal for people to be curious. If it was a significant amount of weight and it shows, I have no problem saying how much it was. It's not like they know how much my current weight is or was. At least they notice, perhaps want to have the same success.

    I feel like this - I answer with pride and tell them it's taken a year, so far. I know I look different & facts are facts. If it encourages someone to have realistic ambitions themselves that's a plus.
  • BrittKnee_Rae
    BrittKnee_Rae Posts: 111 Member
    They don't mean to be rude!! I take it as a compliment along with the jaw drops that I get when people see me! Even though I don't want to tell them the amount, I tell them anyway!! I'm not proud of the amount I lost, I am proud that I lost it yes!! BUT I'm a tad embarrassed that I let myself get that sloppy to the point that I had to lose that much!! I know that sounds confusing as hell.. lol
  • It doesn't bother me, but if it does bother you, you could smile and say something to the effect of "Thanks for noticing" and just not answer.
  • I say yell it from the rafters.. Be proud of the new you. Maybe they are asking because they see your success and want to know how to do it for themselves..
  • katedevall
    katedevall Posts: 240 Member
    It doesn't really bother me.. I used to get asked that all the time. Hell I'm proud of what I lost. I know I got fat but I worked my butt off and lost most of it; I guess it's all in the context you ask lol. I love to ask other people how much they lost and what worked for them? Gives me ideas for the future
  • SarahCW1979
    SarahCW1979 Posts: 572 Member
    Its weird being asked that by someone you dont know well :noway: My friends ask me and I tell them I have no clue because I dont weigh myself regularly. More than happy to tell them about a dropped dress size though!
  • It's never bothered me. If anything, I'm happy people take notice. What I do hate though is the "wow, I can't even tell!" comments, as if loose skin should be draping off of my face or something.