I hate caring what other people think..but I keep doing it!

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scunnin8
scunnin8 Posts: 9
in Motivation and Support
So I really just want to vent about this and maybe get some advice. I have this problem, and it's called comparing myself to other people, and caring what other's think of me. My boyfriend has this bestfriend and his girlfriend is so gorgeous! One day my bf and I were talking about his friend and his girlfriend. I mentioned that she was a real sweet girl and he replied and said, "Yeah she is an awesome girl, real gorgeous too." And I can not help but get jealous. Why? I am never a jealous person! So I start comparing myself to her. I wish I was as thin as her....I wish I had the curves she does. I start really beating myself up about it, because my boyfriend mentioned she was hot. I know he says he thinks I'm pretty....but maybe if I looked like her. I know this is so dumb and so immature, but why am I doing this? I am supposed to start feeling good about myself, while losing weight! I am also so worried about what his guy friends think of me, not just as a person but how I look. I do not want his friends thinking he has an ugly fat girlfriend. It has gotten so bad, I don't even like to go out with his friends anymore, because I'm worried about what they think of me. I'm comparing myself to every girl now... It's time to stop.. but I just keep doing it!

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  • TJ26
    TJ26 Posts: 35
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    I think everyone at some point in there life feels like this...But just remember that he is YOUR boyfriend so he must think you are amazing or he wouldn't be with you. You are also trying to improve your self image so maybe once you see the pounds coming off you will feel better about yourself. Good luck :)
  • KeriD
    KeriD Posts: 324
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    First of all you are BEAUTIFUL. All you need to add is confidence! Someone posted a great message today. Check it out....http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/98811-awesome-reminders
  • xtina11179
    xtina11179 Posts: 352
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    Honestly, I know EXACTLY how you feel, and I do it myself. Believe me, my boyfriend is no underwear model, by any means either. Oh he is a very handsome man, but he is also about 50+ lbs overweight. However, I often tell him how cute he is, etc., but I couldn't tell you the last time he complimented me....and that makes me insecure, especially when he talks about other women. I think it is in our nature as women to compare ourselves to other women. Truthfully, I worry about being judged by other women FAR more than I worry about men. But obviously your boyfriend DOES love you and IS attracted to you, otherwise he wouldn't be with you!! Just keep reminding yourself of that (as I do) and once you get to where you want to be, imagine how great it will feel when your bf's friend's gf is jealous of you!!
  • CreativeRedhead
    CreativeRedhead Posts: 2,166
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    It's not immature or dumb babe! I'm 30 and still have these moments. It kills me inside each time my husband stares at a cuter, sexier, thinner, whatever chick. I immediately think man if I could only look like that. I'm not even sure what to tell you, I get over it for a little bit but it happens again. I can't help but think is he comparing me to every other woman that passes by. But I guess we can't live our lives wishing to be like another. I guess we have to dig deep into ourselves and accept us for what we are. Besides we're here doing this and we'll be the hot chick soon enough. Maybe you'll be making his friends heads turn before you know it! :flowerforyou:
  • SassyMissDasha
    SassyMissDasha Posts: 614
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    I understand how you feel hon! My husband he's what you call a "chubby chaser" though ..so I never really feel insecure around him. And don't ever call yourself ugly or fat ever again!! You're a beautiful person!!
  • gecallo
    gecallo Posts: 135
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    Love yourself more...truly...wholeheartedly...love yourself!
  • scunnin8
    scunnin8 Posts: 9
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    Thanks everyone!

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