Friiends who are not concerned with their weight

Feel free to tell her no every day. Ask her to instead bring lunch and go eat at a park. Don't be afraid to eat first and then go sit with her and just sip water and if you must eat get a side salad with lemon wedges for dressing (SOOO good!). Use $$ as a reason as well as being healthy. (Sometimes people listen to me better when I say no $ more than I say no calories! ) Also, become very familiar with all of the menus / nutritional info of all the local restaurants. My husband slipped me a Subway cookie last night and I thought "how bad can it be?" over 200 cals in one cookie. nearly as much as my whole 6" sun. When i know the cals in advance it's so much easier to decline! Also, on the days you know you will be going to lunch - wear your smallest jeans / pants - it's hard to overeat when you are reminded about wanting to lose weight by your pants!


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luvvvvv mjtwomail's response and totally agree. people listen more when you say "I'm broke" rather than when you say you're watching your weight. Good luck!

I'd agree to go out every once in a while (every day gets expensive fast, so whatever works for your budget!) I would either pick somewhere to go or ask if she can let you know the restaurant in advance. Then look up nutrition information and plan your meal. Many restaurants have nutrition information online... or you can always ask for advice here! I also love the idea of meeting at a park or somewhere you can bring your own food -- I used to do this quite a bit with a friend of mine (she was more health conscious than I was at the time... we just both didn't want to use money to eat out!) The bonus there is we would walk around and get some exercise as well!

Definitely order water eating out... I was looking over my food diary last night and amazed how much sodium there was in restaurant food, even places I could choose healthier options like Subway (though I guess lunch meat isn't very healthy either, but better than most restaurants!)

Also wanted to add: I think it is a good idea to figure out how to eat out at restaurants. When I was doing Weight Watchers a few years ago I ate out much more than I do now. I learned how to eat healthier at restaurants, and I am really grateful for that now, a few years later, when I am back on this weight loss journey. Drink water, order grilled/baked without sauces, seafood is good, watch the toppings on salads, and remember the phrase "on the side"

I have a friend who is eating herself to death.

It sucks.

You do not have to tell her no, just bring your lunch with you. I do that and so do a lot of my friends - we may all go "out" to eat for lunch, but some of us bring our own lunches while others order out. That way you can still hang out and control your food intake at the same time

I agree with a lot of the advice you've gotten already about how to handle the situation. I'd personally probably do a mixture of "no thanks" and eating at my desk beforehand and then maybe actually eat a meal at a restaurant once every 3-4 weeks (of if this is the only time you ever go out to eat, maybe once every 2 weeks or so).

But, I also agree with talking to her (or just showing her) how to eat healthier. It's not about her size -- yes you can certainly be beautiful being overweight -- it's about her health. I care about my friends an awful lot and I want them to be healthy and happy. I won't be pushy, but I will let them know what I'm doing to be healthier. If they're interested, I'll talk to them more. If they're not interested, I just continue mentioning things occasionally. I know I was so overweight because I had no idea what I was doing. If I had a friend talk to me about it more often while watching them have success, I probably would've figured this all out a long time ago.

A good example is my family. They're all overweight -- some are extremely obese while others, just a little overweight. I've been to see my family 3 times in the last 3 months. The first time, I convinced my mom to go for a bike ride and everyone else to go kayaking and canoing. That was great! The 2nd time, I played basketball by myself -- no luck getting anyone more active. Last time, I swam by myself -- again, no luck. But I'm going to keep doing what I want to do to be healthy whether anyone else joins in or not. Eventually someone is going to figure it out and join me again.

Sometimes I can convince my friends to get together for a game of tennis or mini golf. Sometimes I can only get them together at a bar or restaurant -- but I always start with an active suggestion rather than a sit-on-our-butts-consuming-excessive-calories suggestion. Tennis? No. Board games? No. Pot Luck? No. Bar & bar food? Bingo! But you know what? Sometimes we do play tennis or board games or have a pot luck with (mostly) healthy foods. Before I started making other suggestions, we'd just end up at a bar or restaurant every time.