college students: how to deal with an unhealthy roommate?!

I'm having some trouble just dealing with my roommate in college who EATS SO TERRIBLY...... and never exercises. The last part isn't a big deal, although it'd be nice to have a convenient workout partner, but the problem is she's constantly eating junk (cookies, chips, sushi, cake, whole milk, pastries... etc) in the room, keeping junk stored in the room, and offers it to me too! (What can I say, she's a nice person who likes to share... haha.) Not to mention, she's still her cute, small self! I've already told her sternly to stop sharing her devil food with me, but I still can't help drooling when I smell the croissants she's baking in MY toaster oven. Sometimes when my roommate isn't in the room, I desperately just want to grab her bag of chips off the shelf and destroy my calorie intake for the day. :(

The question is: Have you guys ever experienced this problem where you lived with an unhealthy person and how did y'all deal with it? Thanks!

Replies

  • tsikkz
    tsikkz Posts: 404 Member
    Im not in college but I do have a boyfriend who doesn't participate at all in my healthy lifestyle.

    I simply cook my own meals, and he eats pre packaged crap I buy from costco for him. I enjoy working out alone because I get time alone and when I get home hes always there to give me a hug and sometimes he helps me wash my sweaty body LOL

    Hes a super picky eater and wont touch anything with "healthy" things in it but im ok with it because it lets me be more experimental with my cooking without worrying about feeding him something that tastes god awful lol

    As for the unhealthy food in the room, I think you just need to be strong, I have a pantry full of crappy food always but I just tell myself how badly I want to be healthy and happy and Its not such a big deal. Oh and I always have an unhealthy snack at the same time every night which gives me something to look forward to
  • Sqeekyjojo
    Sqeekyjojo Posts: 704 Member
    It's not your problem.


    It's also not your food.
  • I hear you, sister! I actually lived in a suite of 4 girls (myself included) who ate awfully! I luckily got to move into a townhouse with 7 of my good friends who for the most part shared the same healthy habits as myself. We had a juicer, a cabinet full of vitamins and supplements, another with complex carbs, and of course a booze cabinet. However, one of my roommates LOVED candy, whole milk, sandwiches, white pasta, fatty cheeses, and beer! As I was trying to avoid all cravings he would always offer me an omelet made with pork sausage, cheddar cheese, hot sauce, gummy worms... you name it. My stomach would grumble every time I declined. When I'd go into the fridge for a late night snack, I totally wanted to take his sour watermelon gummies or left over sub and call it a day...

    What we all agreed on was labeling our things. We even wrote on the fridge things like "grab only what you intended to grab!" and "one item per visit" or "step away, fatty!" as jokes to keep us from peeking on others' shelves and getting "inspired" to eat something we didn't initially plan to (whole milk for cereal or pancake syrup for waffles). Ultimately, I simply told everyone that I was very focused on bettering myself and would only be eating food that I specifically buy. As for constantly being tempted, I just fought it, looked at the picture I taped to the fridge of my goal body, and it reminded me that it'll all be worth it in the end!
  • jayche
    jayche Posts: 1,128 Member
    Had a similar experience with a roommate a few semesters ago.
    Solution? IIFYM/Flexible dieting

    I'm kind of pressed for time but I'll come back and edit my post/send you a message later if someone else doesn't already explain it.
  • I dont have room mates per-se but i am in the exact same boat as tsikkz, as i live with my boyfriend. I buy healthy food as often as i can because we are low on cash. I also have a cabinet full of mac and cheese and chips and what not. I am not as strong willed as i would like to be but i have been ok the past week. I keep pictures of my past self and other pictures of what id like to look like on my computer and i take pictures out of magazines and keep them on the fridge. but like another person said just tell yourself its not your food- you didnt pay for it. I end up making multiple dishes one for him because he is so picky whenever i mention healthy food haha, but it gives me the chance to experiment with all the healthy recipes i find on the internet. ( i am also addicted to watching exercise videos and reading healthy articles that i save save save and don't always use) He is such a bad influence! but i have learn to choose the right choices, and i think that is one of the biggest steps everyone here is challenged with. my biggest strategy is always having a healthy snack that i can just grab if i am dying to eat something i shouldn't. my favorite are granola bars (esp in my purse) and humus with carrots or cucumbers. find something you like. I hope some of this rambling helped and god luck!
  • I'm having some trouble just dealing with my roommate in college who EATS SO TERRIBLY...... and never exercises. The last part isn't a big deal, although it'd be nice to have a convenient workout partner, but the problem is she's constantly eating junk (cookies, chips, sushi, cake, whole milk, pastries... etc) in the room, keeping junk stored in the room, and offers it to me too! (What can I say, she's a nice person who likes to share... haha.) Not to mention, she's still her cute, small self! I've already told her sternly to stop sharing her devil food with me, but I still can't help drooling when I smell the croissants she's baking in MY toaster oven. Sometimes when my roommate isn't in the room, I desperately just want to grab her bag of chips off the shelf and destroy my calorie intake for the day. :(

    The question is: Have you guys ever experienced this problem where you lived with an unhealthy person and how did y'all deal with it? Thanks!

    My husband isn't a healthy eater. He prefers his tons of bread, pastas, tons of sweets, all kinds of unhealthy foods. That's just what he likes. When he's ready to eat like I do, he'll tell me, I'm not going to force it on him. When I cook dinner at night, I cook 3 different dinners..one for myself, one for my son, and one for my husband. Just because my cupboards and fridge are full of junk food doesn't mean I have to eat them. I have plenty of my own healthy foods to eat. I'm responsible and accountable for myself, no way I'd blame it on someone else if I decided I wanted pop tart of piece of cake.
  • JessHealthKick
    JessHealthKick Posts: 800 Member
    Im not in college but I do have a boyfriend who doesn't participate at all in my healthy lifestyle.

    I simply cook my own meals, and he eats pre packaged crap I buy from costco for him. I enjoy working out alone because I get time alone and when I get home hes always there to give me a hug and sometimes he helps me wash my sweaty body LOL

    Hes a super picky eater and wont touch anything with "healthy" things in it but im ok with it because it lets me be more experimental with my cooking without worrying about feeding him something that tastes god awful lol

    As for the unhealthy food in the room, I think you just need to be strong, I have a pantry full of crappy food always but I just tell myself how badly I want to be healthy and happy and Its not such a big deal. Oh and I always have an unhealthy snack at the same time every night which gives me something to look forward to

    this sounds kind of sad - you're working towards a long life of good health, and he's eating himself to death. (to be blunt, sorry but it's just how I read it) edit: and you support it. Maybe stop making the crap so convenient? His tastes will improve and he will have better energy, temper, libido, everything! ;)
  • julie781
    julie781 Posts: 221 Member
    I live with a guy who's not so healthy. This is a great time to practice discipline and willpower. It will be tough, you're so young. You will have unhealthy foods around you forever.
    And sushi's not so bad... unless its gas station sushi :)
  • carrietehbear
    carrietehbear Posts: 384 Member
    As the former unhealthy roommate who lived with a health nut... you do nothing. You say "no thank you" and move on. If it's not your food, you don't eat it. I loved my crunchy granola roommate but I would have been ticked off if she ate my food when I wasn't around. The way I see a problem is if you split food costs. I was living with someone when I started getting healthy and we shared food/bills equally. She eventually started to eat better because I didn't want to buy junk all the time.
  • werewolfseeker
    werewolfseeker Posts: 13 Member
    Be Strong! lol

    I fight myself everyday not to eat junk food, and destroy my calories because then I would be upset. I don't live in a Dorm, but I live with my mom and sis. My sis help me jump on the bandwagon to start getting healthy, and we try to get my mom involved too. But she beats it around the bush and eats unhealthy things sometimes. For example: Today we happen to go shopping and went to Potbelly (delicious!) so walking to get the train, my mom stops at Dunkin donuts and bought the 6 donuts for 3.99! I'm fighting on jumping the donuts, because at the end of the day if I gain weight, I'll be upset for setting myself back. As in the end of the day your friend can eat whatever she wants and stay thin (assuming) and if you eat it, a bomb goes off in your head and ya'll slump away seeing that pound. So all in all, eat it tomorrow when your calories restart xD
  • SquidVonBob
    SquidVonBob Posts: 290 Member
    And sushi's not so bad... unless its gas station sushi :)

    Thank you. The rice (the actual sushi) is calorie dense, but just don't eat a ton of it. The fish (the sashimi) is usually very healthy. Sushi can be pretty good for you, but a few things can make it bad. Don't get tempura rolls, be careful with overdoing soy sauce and ungai sauce, and don't get spicy rolls because the spicy sauce is mayonnaise based.

    I hear people saying sushi is bad here all the time, but at it's core it's fish and rice. It's only as bad as you make it. :)
  • greeneyes0809
    greeneyes0809 Posts: 422 Member
    I'm in a dorm myself so I feel ya! There are so many tempting foods not just in the dining hall but also in everyone's rooms, sometimes it's so hard to resist. I like to just always have healthier options available. If I am tempted by my roommate's candy or cookies I just grab an apple, have a pice of gum or drink some crystal light. Basically any other option to satisfy my sweet tooth! Just stay strong and soon you'll find yourself not even craving the junk!
  • trudijoy
    trudijoy Posts: 1,685 Member
    i'm not in college, but my flatmate is shocking. he is perfectly capable of having mcdonalds twice a day, icecream every night, drinks coke like i gulp water.... luckily for me he's extremely overweight because it's a visual reminder of what that food can do!

    you just have to be firm with yourself, and beg her not to 'be nice by offering to share'. You can't stop her eating what she wants but she needs to respect your decisions too.
  • ninerbuff
    ninerbuff Posts: 49,028 Member
    I'm having some trouble just dealing with my roommate in college who EATS SO TERRIBLY...... and never exercises. The last part isn't a big deal, although it'd be nice to have a convenient workout partner, but the problem is she's constantly eating junk (cookies, chips, sushi, cake, whole milk, pastries... etc) in the room, keeping junk stored in the room, and offers it to me too! (What can I say, she's a nice person who likes to share... haha.) Not to mention, she's still her cute, small self! I've already told her sternly to stop sharing her devil food with me, but I still can't help drooling when I smell the croissants she's baking in MY toaster oven. Sometimes when my roommate isn't in the room, I desperately just want to grab her bag of chips off the shelf and destroy my calorie intake for the day. :(

    The question is: Have you guys ever experienced this problem where you lived with an unhealthy person and how did y'all deal with it? Thanks!
    You control you. You don't control what your roomate eats. You just need to be steadfast about your own discipline.

    In reality, food alone isn't the cause of being unhealthy. Weight, exercise, rest, stress, sleep, risk behavior (like smoking), environment and genetics all contribute. Having a cookie once in awhile is okay. Just don't eat the whole bag.

    A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
    IDEA Fitness member
    Kickboxing Certified Instructor
    Been in fitness industry for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
  • tsikkz
    tsikkz Posts: 404 Member
    Im not in college but I do have a boyfriend who doesn't participate at all in my healthy lifestyle.

    I simply cook my own meals, and he eats pre packaged crap I buy from costco for him. I enjoy working out alone because I get time alone and when I get home hes always there to give me a hug and sometimes he helps me wash my sweaty body LOL

    Hes a super picky eater and wont touch anything with "healthy" things in it but im ok with it because it lets me be more experimental with my cooking without worrying about feeding him something that tastes god awful lol

    As for the unhealthy food in the room, I think you just need to be strong, I have a pantry full of crappy food always but I just tell myself how badly I want to be healthy and happy and Its not such a big deal. Oh and I always have an unhealthy snack at the same time every night which gives me something to look forward to

    this sounds kind of sad - you're working towards a long life of good health, and he's eating himself to death. (to be blunt, sorry but it's just how I read it) edit: and you support it. Maybe stop making the crap so convenient? His tastes will improve and he will have better energy, temper, libido, everything! ;)

    Yeah its fine, everything you said is true.. He doesn't have a weight problem, I didn't mean we eat separately all the time just when he can't modify what I'm cooking he'll have something easy and pre packaged. We do very rarely eat the same thing though. for example if we have taco mince I'll have a salad and he will make a burrito. I think the prepackaged stuff he eats is disgusting and don't really have any trouble staying away from it
  • kmm7309
    kmm7309 Posts: 802 Member
    I have a roommate who is just ridiculous with her eating. She is pushing 300 pounds (maybe more) and swears that she is the hottest little number on the block. I'm jealous of her confidence, but she is not all that. What I had to do is offer to do all the shopping and cooking, and she splits the food cost. She still brings junk into the house constantly but as I go further into my lifestyle, those packaged foods have lost some of their appeal.
  • SoDamnHungry
    SoDamnHungry Posts: 6,998 Member
    Self control, sadly.

    But since it sounds like she's a nice girl, why not try asking if she'll keep her delicious food out of sight when she isn't in the room? She may be willing to oblige.
  • Elf_Princess1210
    Elf_Princess1210 Posts: 895 Member
    Yeah I had one of those in college. I just ignored her and continued to eat well. It also helped she mostly are junk food that I either hated or was ambivalent towards!!
  • michaelachallis
    michaelachallis Posts: 137 Member
    I dealt with this for over a year and it is bloody hard!!!! As they say willpower is a muscle, if you overuse it it will give in eventually.

    What i did is i told myself their food was out of bounds, if i didn't buy it i didn't eat it and if i took any i considered it stealing.

    Fill your shelf or cupboard and part of the fridge with gorgeous healthy food and even stick a motivational picture of your fridge or pantry door to remind you what you are trying to achieve.

    Also working out around the time they eat the most junk (for me it used to evenings) and with the workout fresh in your mind you won't want to touch any bad stuff!
  • triggsta
    triggsta Posts: 140
    I told my roommate, who loves to bake sweet things that I usually crave in the first place, that if she loves me as a friend she wouldn't offer them to me. She takes that really hard, because she wants to be nice and give some to me but I just have to be firm in telling her that it's really actually not nice at all.

    Experience with her and other roommates has led to a somewhat bad route, but what works for me... honestly? I pity them. That they miss out on my delicious healthy meals. That they are willing to subject their body to the unhealthy foods and lack of exercise. That they think their enjoyment of unhealthy processed foods is more supreme than my enjoyment of healthy clean foods. I, of course, don't tell them any of this, but this judgment I put on them and their actions ultimately reinforces my own such that the worse they do, the more inclined I am to do better on my end. So it works for me and I keep it to myself so it works for my relationships with them, too.
  • Freidon
    Freidon Posts: 169 Member
    I live with three other girls in a suite-type dorm. They're pretty balanced, half solid food, half junk food. I just make a barrier in my mind not to touch any of their food, even if they offer it to me. They leave oreos and various cookies in the living area for anyone to grab. While I could technically "just have one", I know that I would have to walk by it everyday and be tempted. So I choose to not eat any at all. Same goes for free campus food. I'm not tempted to eat any, because I've trained myself to the point that I didn't even consider it an option.

    I made the mistake of accepting leftover Valentine's day chocolate when a roommate and I were watching a movie a few weeks ago. Big mistake. I craved chocolate nonstop for a week. Went over my calories for the first time in months.

    Just don't allow yourself to eat their food, even if it's healthy stuff. The more you have the mentality of "it's not mine", even if it's being offered to you, the more capable you are of being in a triggering food environment and staying healthy.
  • JJordon
    JJordon Posts: 857 Member
    I live with a guy who's not so healthy. This is a great time to practice discipline and willpower. It will be tough, you're so young. You will have unhealthy foods around you forever.
    And sushi's not so bad... unless its gas station sushi :)

    At the gas station, I prefer to avoid the 20 weight oil and go straight for the 5 weight oil with my California rolls, just saying.
  • stonel94
    stonel94 Posts: 550 Member
    Yeah I had that problem my sophomore year, but just say, it's hers, not yours, you cant invite yourself to take it, and if she's offering it she probably wants it for herself really.
    Eat protein rich meals and fiber so you don't get so hungry and crave the bad foods, but mostly, every once in a while, have something, no point in having everything always off limits
  • JessHealthKick
    JessHealthKick Posts: 800 Member
    Im not in college but I do have a boyfriend who doesn't participate at all in my healthy lifestyle.

    I simply cook my own meals, and he eats pre packaged crap I buy from costco for him. I enjoy working out alone because I get time alone and when I get home hes always there to give me a hug and sometimes he helps me wash my sweaty body LOL

    Hes a super picky eater and wont touch anything with "healthy" things in it but im ok with it because it lets me be more experimental with my cooking without worrying about feeding him something that tastes god awful lol

    As for the unhealthy food in the room, I think you just need to be strong, I have a pantry full of crappy food always but I just tell myself how badly I want to be healthy and happy and Its not such a big deal. Oh and I always have an unhealthy snack at the same time every night which gives me something to look forward to

    this sounds kind of sad - you're working towards a long life of good health, and he's eating himself to death. (to be blunt, sorry but it's just how I read it) edit: and you support it. Maybe stop making the crap so convenient? His tastes will improve and he will have better energy, temper, libido, everything! ;)

    Yeah its fine, everything you said is true.. He doesn't have a weight problem, I didn't mean we eat separately all the time just when he can't modify what I'm cooking he'll have something easy and pre packaged. We do very rarely eat the same thing though. for example if we have taco mince I'll have a salad and he will make a burrito. I think the prepackaged stuff he eats is disgusting and don't really have any trouble staying away from it

    aah that's good it doesn't tempt you. Weight isn't the only problem though, those prepackaged things have so much bad stuff in them :( high sugar, high salt, preservatives... and the meats are the worst parts of the animal! I used to love pizza and stuff so much too, and even had the option to have it tonight (on holiday), but instead went and cooked salmon and veggies because I couldn't stomach the thought. Luckily my bf is very healthy and is the one trying to help me stay away from the chocolate box, as well as being my guinea pig for quinoa inspired dishes. That, and the fact that until recently I would eat more than him (cutting cals helped a lot).

    I guess you can try make small changes in the short term, big overhauls are never taken on happily by the other party, but small changes here and there can make a difference I think :) for example my bf's rice bowl has slowly become bigger each morning (trying to fatten him up!) hehe!
  • My roommate sounds oddly similar. She's a tiny little thing with a big heart and an even bigger sweet tooth. For me, pre-planning my meals/snacks often helps because then I know what I'm eating. I like to leave a little "wiggle" room in my daily calories in the evenings after dinner so that when the temptation to accept her offer of candy or cookies arises, I can choose to indulge (a little!) when I really really want it.

    The other thing that really helps me is having healthy snacks within arms reach to make the temptation to say yes a little less... well tempting. On Sundays I like to cut up a massive amount of veggies and put them in little baggies or tupperware so when we're watching a movie in the evenings and she's munching on chips, I can have my own snack too. I like to do the same thing with nuts (small, pre-portioned baggies) and keep fruits around that have minimal prep work.

    The best thing I do for myself mentally, is tell myself to wait an hour, and if I still REALLY want what she's having, I'll give in and have a (small) portion. Often I find waiting and distracting myself with another activity, or just thinking about something else for a longer period of time will often take my attention away from whatever she's having and the temptation subsides.

    Living with people who don't eat the same way you do can be difficult, but ultimately it's all up to you. Give in every now and then (to be social, and for your own sanity), but stay strong for what you really want!
  • bethanykf
    bethanykf Posts: 68
    My husband isn't the healthiest eater - we always have junk in the house. What works for me is having a plan for what I am going to eat - for dinner at the very least. I plan around that and if there's something that I really want I add it to my tracker and plan the rest of the day around the calories that I have left over so I can indulge a little in the evening.