I'm so tired of this constant struggle with my weight and ob

aproc
aproc Posts: 1,033 Member
edited September 21 in Motivation and Support
My problems began after I successfully dropped some weight. At first I was just trying to get down to 120.(I am 5'8 and was 180 at my heaviest) Once I got there, I was so much happier and had more confidence. Then I continued and am now at 110. Which is underweight on BMI. Dieting completely messed me up. I can't get out of the thinking of eating to lose weight. Everything I go to eat, i'm still limiting the calories without realizing it. And I realize that I need to gain at least ten pounds but its a constant struggle because even when I see the scale go up a pound, I freak out and it affects how I eat that day. I KNOW I need to gain a bit but I can't help freaking out and I also fear when I start gaining weight, it will just keep going up. And I am CONSTANTLY hungry throughout the day now. Always thinking of food even if I just ate a good meal. I miss not always thinking about food and enjoying everything because of it.
Right now my brother is trying to work with me and helped me get started in the gym and plans on switching up my routine in a month and see where I am at. He keeps telling me I need to be eating around 2000 calories and need to gain a bit of weight. He had me agree to at least get up to 120. And I know I need to, but I can't get away from these habits, always thinking of food, and freaking out when the scale goes up.

I'm sorry. I just needed to rant a bit and put it out there. The only person I have been able to really talk to about this is my brother. Any suggestions would be welcome. Even now I want to get up and get some food... =_=

Replies

  • squoozyq
    squoozyq Posts: 305
    There are amazing places out there with psychologists to work cognitively with you to understand why you are doing this, and how to fix it!
    You are not alone, dont' ever think that. You will get some support here as well, but talk to your GP to find out what's available for you in your area.
    Best of luck,
    s
  • heartshapdworld
    heartshapdworld Posts: 323 Member
    Hi:

    Please do not take this the wrong way - I say this with kindness in my heart - but it sounds like to me you may need to speak to a therapist and a nutritionist recomended by your doctor to assist you in creating a healthy relationship (and a healthy thought process) in regards to food.

    G-.
  • Ms_Natalie
    Ms_Natalie Posts: 1,030 Member
    Hi there :flowerforyou:
    Although the majority of this forum are trying to lose weight...this site is also dedicated to gaining weight...have you entered your information into the programme? If so, what did it say?

    I can understand how your dieting has led to your relationship with food, and it is this that needs to change. The way you view food. Think of food as nutrition, not as a potential path to being overweight or unhealthy. You CAN gain this weight but obviously, as you know, it has to be done in the most sensible manner possible. Find foods that you enjoy which are high in fats (not neccesarily saturated fats) such as nuts that you can quietly graze upon throughout the day.

    You are doing an amazing job already, by consulting this site :flowerforyou: and you are very lucky to have such a supportive brother. Getting to the gym will help bulk up your muscle and add weight to your body in the best possible way. 10lbs is a considerable amount of weight, so don't expect results to come quickly...but have no fear...they will. Set yourself goals and aim for these.

    I am sorry the info is brief, but I have no experience of wanting to gain weight, but I want you to know that you are in the best possible place to achieve this and if any rants, questions or problems arise; this forum and the amazing people on it will do their utmost best to help you out! :flowerforyou:

    Welcome :happy:
  • Ms_Natalie
    Ms_Natalie Posts: 1,030 Member
    hi there, me again, if you are in the UK and you feel you would like the help of a support group, I can direct you to some uk based groups. I am a studying clinical psychologist but my field is not focused upon nutrition and therefore it would be highly unprofessional of me to guide you in a theraputic manner...but I can point you in a good direction. PM me if you want to take things off this thread and discuss anything.

    All the best :flowerforyou:
  • aproc
    aproc Posts: 1,033 Member
    Thankyou. :)
    And I have thought about seeing a therapist and would be open to going but money problems are keeping me from that.

    @Ms_Natalie- Thankyou, I'm in the US though.
  • bjberry
    bjberry Posts: 665 Member
    Sweet lady,
    You had put yourself in a mind set to lose weight, listened to everyone and followed advice and it worked. You had total control of your weight. Now you are afraid of losing control and gaining the weight back. Take things one step at a time and maintain complete control of your life. Now that you have gotten below your weight level, it is time to ease slowly off the gas pedal.
    1. Have this site set your calorie level so you do not lose weight and do not gain weight.
    Example: Your Basa Metabolism level (# of calories for you to lay totally still and have enough calories burned for breathing, heart beating, and digestion) is 1292 calories per day, for 68 inches and 110lbs.
    2. You need to put all of your wonderful mind-over-matter resources into eating more than 1292 calories per day. This site can also set you up so you gain one pound a month--30 days to gain a mere 16 ounces.
    3. This way, you can eat enough not to be hungry, but not enough to lose control of your weight.
    4. As suggested above, you need a qualified person to talk to about your fear. We all have fears, that's why counselors and friends are wonderful people to have around.
    Hugs, Sweet Lady. BJB
  • cranky2003
    cranky2003 Posts: 72
    How about toss that scale and enjoy food when you're hungry. Hang out with people that not constantly talk about weight.
  • yazi_livefit
    yazi_livefit Posts: 51 Member
    What your mind can do to your body- no one can. It can either make it better - or destroy it!! It seems to me that you have gotten little too carried away when it comes to counting the calories and losing weight. You do not need a psychiatrist to tell you that you need to eat-- ha ha its hilarious what people say, you need to change the pattern of thinking, thats all.

    Think of your body as your best friend, because ultimately that's what your body really is to you. When your body is sending signals to your brain that it is hungry, feed it do not starve!! By starving yourself you actually do damage to your body. When you don't supply the much needed nutrients, your body is forced to take these out of your muscle and bone tissue, which in a long run will leave you with weak or brittle muscles/bones. This is definitely what you don't want to happen--- you will need a fully functional body for the years to come right??

    So, work with your body, supply it with food and water and in return your body will reward you with some healthy bones, muscles and great overall function and health.

    Eat every 3-4 hours, consume healthy foods like proteins, whole grains and veggies. Think positive and the changes will happen. Don't think that you have a problem you cannot change...rather think of the ways to solve your bad eating habits.
  • dansdeb
    dansdeb Posts: 164
    It sounds like you need someone to help you out, such as a therapist, counselor or someone not emotionally attached to you. If you have EAP (Employee Assistance Program) at work, they could help you. best of luck
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