How do I change my thinking?

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BitterGoil
BitterGoil Posts: 32 Member
in Motivation and Support
I am half Vietnamese and half Caucasian, most of my father's side, the Caucasian side, is very prone to weight gain. Both parents have diabetes. I've managed to stay pretty small in my past, but as I hit my 40s, I have hit my highest weight, even higher than when I was pregnant. I have one 5-year-old boy.

I've been in a new-ish relationship for 2 years, and my man and me are very much the same in that we love to indulge in food and drink. The only difference is, I feel a need to balance it with exercise and moderation. So it's been 2 years worth of having a hard time saying "no" to things and hearing him say "you're crazy, you don't need to diet" and 15-20 lbs. heavier. So there's that. But recently, I have been experiencing difficulty being tempted by and can't stop thinking about fast food or just fatty things that I love like chili cheese fries and chips. I am currently going to a personal trainer at L.A. Fitness that I can't afford in effort to get myself back to feeling better about myself.

Other than getting a self-help book to help me rewire my brain, anybody have tricks that keep them from thinking about fatty foods?
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Replies

  • ExNihil0
    ExNihil0 Posts: 60
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    Stop being weak. Be Awesome instead!! If that doesn't do it, try a rubber band around your wrist and flick it when you think of **** you don't want to.
  • Ramberta
    Ramberta Posts: 1,312 Member
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    It's going to take time. When I finally got serious about eating healthier (and therefore making fast/very fatty foods a special treat rather than a multiple-times-a-week indulgence), I would practically start salivating driving by McDonald's, Arby's, Burger King, and the rest. I still do, if I'm hungry on my way home.

    But just be strong for 2-3 weeks and the cravings will dissipate, I guarantee it. Don't give in! Just think: would you rather have those chili cheese fries, OR feel confident and sexy again? I think it's a no-brainer.
  • lbetancourt
    lbetancourt Posts: 522 Member
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    yoga & mediation. the mind is a powerful tool.
  • quirkytizzy
    quirkytizzy Posts: 4,052 Member
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    Part of this is the being new part. In the beginning, food and calories were CONSTANTLY on my mind. That's just part of developing new habits. That part should ease soon.

    As for the rest - time and practice in being patient. You'll find that through making better decisions every day, your mind will also follow suit. It'll take some time and you're going to have days where you don't make good decisions. That's okay. No one's perfect.

    "We do not think our way into right living, we LIVE our way into right thinking." Just be patient and focus on making the better daily changes. You'll find it's a lot easier to continue those good decisions as you go along.
  • Cr01502
    Cr01502 Posts: 3,614 Member
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    Do it by actions.

    The thinking follows.
  • 1ConcreteGirl
    1ConcreteGirl Posts: 3,677 Member
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    Other than getting a self-help book to help me rewire my brain, anybody have tricks that keep them from thinking about fatty foods?

    I find that I stop thinking about my favorite indulgences when I enjoy them.

    There's no need to completely cut anything out of your life. Have a small amount, enjoy it, and move on.
  • BitterGoil
    BitterGoil Posts: 32 Member
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    Stop being weak. Be Awesome instead!! If that doesn't do it, try a rubber band around your wrist and flick it when you think of **** you don't want to.

    Haha! That's just nutty enough that I'll try it! Thanks.
  • coleen424
    coleen424 Posts: 2 Member
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    Don't give up hope, I have been there myself. Just find something to distract that thought. Call a friend, polish your nails, look at pictures of cute outfits that you would like to get. That worked for me.
  • bzmom
    bzmom Posts: 1,332 Member
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    I had cheese fries this weekend!! and I have lost 3lbs this week alone (I weighed in today). The thing is not to take it away completely but just learn to plan for it and eat in moderation.
  • BitterGoil
    BitterGoil Posts: 32 Member
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    yoga & mediation. the mind is a powerful tool.

    I used to do yoga and love it. I regret signing up for a trainer which I'm financially obligated to. By August I won't be on the hook for it, so I will try yoga again. Thanks.
  • jomtois
    jomtois Posts: 22 Member
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    Fake it till you make it!
  • MinnieInMaine
    MinnieInMaine Posts: 6,400 Member
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    Be more mindful about your decisions. Sure that fast food sounds good but will it taste good? Are you limiting yourself too much in order to lose weight and therefore sacrificing taste (bland food leaves you wanting)? Or is your daily calorie intake so low that your body is literally starving for those nutrients it lacks (too limited on fat/carb intake)?

    Instead of caving to those comfort foods, try finding healthier alternatives that taste just as good. Make your own chili at home with lean meat, beans and tons of veggies. Get frozen french fries and bake just enough to have one serving.

    Instead of thinking about what you can't have, think about what you CAN have
  • teenhamodic
    teenhamodic Posts: 43
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    well good to hear that your done with the personal trainer by august because if i was your personal trainer, and i didnt see results, i would quit you myself - no joke.

    i'm not a personal trainer, but really, you're not benefiting from the person and he's just pocketing your money.

    aside from that - i think you'll need to get real with yourself and whether or not the person you are with is supporting you. if the person isn't helping, you may need to change that as well. yea it's offensive/hard but if you dont want to hear these kinds of things and all you want is a pity party... you're at the wrong site.
  • BitterGoil
    BitterGoil Posts: 32 Member
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    Be more mindful about your decisions. Sure that fast food sounds good but will it taste good?

    Yes, they DO taste SO good. That's the problem. Funny thing is, I can resist sweets. Just not fatty, fried, and salty! Oh and carbs in the form of pasta.
  • j4zepedajj
    j4zepedajj Posts: 70
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    Well I have had much the same problem for a long time... I just LOVE FOOD! Being Latino we eat a lot of fried food and flour based baked good like bread, cakes and tortillas... Not to mention the TONS of other food I like!!

    BUT I will say that what I have found works for me is a change of lifestyle... Diets DONT WORK... You have to change your eating as a whole... HOWEVER, since its sooo hard... what I've done is FORCE MYSELF by ONLY BUYING WHATS HEALTHY and in small quantities.... I only buy enough food for the portioned meals that I'm making for Lunch and Dinner... plus whats needed for my morning shake....

    This eliminates the possibility of my wanting a muffin or a candy or some chorizo or whatever... because even if I want it... Its not in the house and I cant get it without an effort of going all the way to the store for a fix.. and I can manage to guilt trip myself out of it...

    Then on the weekends I eat whatever I want for at least one meal a day Friday - Sunday.... This helps to keep me sane!!!

    It really works!!
  • dsjohndrow
    dsjohndrow Posts: 1,820 Member
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    You change your thinking by first changing your actions. When you change your actions for a good period of time, you will think in terms of staying fit. And in the end, your emotions will follow.

    I would start with the following:
    - Commit to logging everyday no matter what.
    - Getting 30 minutes of some sort of exercise in 3 times a week. SCHEDULE IT.
    - Learn to replace bad foods with good. (Read the labels, learn what good ingredients are.) Try new foods. Switch bread, pasta etc to whole grain. Add in beans, get lite salad dressings, drink water and skip diet soda. Switch to low or not fat dairy. IE: Greek yogurt and goat cheese. Veggies & fruit! Lean red meats, chicken, turkey and fish.
    - Dump the fast food.

    These are lifestyle changes. Eventually you will think in terms of eating well. And if you put some effort into exercise, you'll find a day without it just doesn't feel right.

    Good luck.
  • jjo202
    jjo202 Posts: 9 Member
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    I was "trying" to lose weight for a few months before coming onto MFP and logging religiously. That's when the actual weight loss started, before that it was just super frustrating: I was trying to be "careful" but with no real framework and so many calories would sneak in. And I'd succumb to cravings all the time. I let myself pig out for a few weeks to get it out of my system, gained a few more pounds (but under 5), and finally hit a point where I could resolve to be serious. Now that I'm starting to see some weight go, I don't even want to binge anymore, it feels too good to see my body coming back to the way I want it. But I think I needed to let myself say screw it for a bit and go on a bit of a bender before I could really tighten the reins again.

    I have the same issue with my partner too - we LOVE to eat together, and when we're traveling it's a delicious disaster. But now I make sure that I'm in charge of the shopping and the cooking, so that I can make meals that are lean but still delicious, and he can add in cheese, oil, sour cream, etc. as he wants to the final product. And I try to keep eating out to a minimum, because it's just too easy to not know what you're actually eating and eat too much of it.
  • BitterGoil
    BitterGoil Posts: 32 Member
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    yea it's offensive/hard but if you don't want to hear these kinds of things and all you want is a pity party... you're at the wrong site.

    No, I don't want a pity party. I was just asking for advice. Thanks for your feedback.
  • mamabisme
    mamabisme Posts: 59 Member
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    Make sure you're eating a balanced diet. I've found that getting pleanty of all the right stuff (fruits, veggies, protien, fiber) has really helped to curb my cravings. If there's any thing you feel you can't live without, incorporate it in to your diet on a regular basis but in a healthier. For me, that's pasta. Instead of having loads of white pasta covered in fatty sauces and sausages all the time I have whole grain pasta (one serving) cooked with lots of veggies, a little olive oil and sometimes a turkey sausage mixed in. Eating a healthier version of my favorite at least once a week keeps me from going crazy. All that said, there is nothing wrong with indulging on occasion. If you really want the chili cheese fries split an order with your boyfriend and work the rest of the day's meals around it, so it still works with your goals.
  • emilynicole02
    emilynicole02 Posts: 355 Member
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    http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/915415-motivation-motivation-read-me-you-ll-be-happy-you-did

    GO THERE & READ IT!!

    you'll be glad you did!! :)

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