WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME????

I am a 40 year old mother of 3, had a hysterectomy and I feel like I just need to give up. I am never going to loose this weight!!! No matter how hard I try it won't come off!! I am changing everything again and this is the last time. I will open my diary in the a.m and I will eat healthy. I keep letting myself down and getting all DEPRESSED!!! This is not good at all and I AM NOT A QUITER!!! But since yesterday all I have done is cry and I feel like I could just curl up in a ball and just take every diet pill known to woman/man. HELP ME PLEASE!!!!:sad: :sad: :sad: :sad: :cry: :cry: :brokenheart: :brokenheart:
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Replies

  • iulia_maddie
    iulia_maddie Posts: 2,780 Member
    Hey Christie, there's nothing wrong with you, we all get discouraged sometimes.
    Please don't waste your money on diet pills, they don't work. Eat at a moderate caloric deficit, try to get some exercise, and most importantly, BE PATIENT.
  • hofosho1020
    hofosho1020 Posts: 179
    Just take it one day at a time! Think of it this way--you wouldn't forget to brush your teeth one morning and then just decide, "CRAP! I blew it! I'm never brushing my teeth again! I give up!"

    Just every time you have a choice, try to make the healthy choice. And then make the NEXT healthy choice, and on and on.
  • mockchoc
    mockchoc Posts: 6,573 Member
    Are you making it harder on yourself than you need to be? As long as you are eating below your TDEE you will lose weight so maybe up your calories closer to it so you aren't tempted to give up.
  • marksvizz
    marksvizz Posts: 33
    just take it one step at a time and don't give up, you will succeed but you have to have a positive attitude , You will and can do this!
  • kinsellae
    kinsellae Posts: 167 Member
    Are you making it harder on yourself than you need to be? As long as you are eating below your TDEE you will lose weight so maybe up your calories closer to it so you aren't tempted to give up.

    This
  • templerenovations
    templerenovations Posts: 1 Member
    Christe - There is nothing wrong with you - you are beautifully and wonderfully made and YOU WILL BEAT IT! You will because you are not a quitter - you matter - you want more for your life and your children's life. Keep up the fight!! I know it is hard I myself am a backslider from many moons back. I need to loose 100 lbs and I keep loosing and gaining the same 15 pounds now for two months. I am committed to change for me, for my family, and just as an example to all the students I teach. Dont quit on yourself - you are a winner.
  • ChristieDF
    ChristieDF Posts: 178 Member
    Thank you all!!! I will try harder and focus more on me.
  • I like the toothbrush analogy! You do have to be patient and make focused choices several times a day. You are a beautiful woman, and you can be strong! I was in a wheelchair 3 years ago, and now I can ride a horse, walk a mile, lift weights and take care of my children! You never know what is in store for you tomorrow.:flowerforyou:
  • It takes time, don't give up and don't look at anyone else's wt loss to compare yourself, we are all individuals. Are you walking or doing any form of exercise? With diet and exercise together, the wt loss is more. You can start by taking brisk walks 30-45 mins 5 days a week.
  • dancingj2
    dancingj2 Posts: 4,572 Member
    :flowerforyou:
    Many of us have been there too with one diet or another. And I do still have days that I hear the siren song of chocolate, chips or pastries calling. And sometimes I answer it :( But every day is a new beginning and I get too start over.

    Try not to let the number on the scale define who you are. Start every day anew. And remember we are here for each other:smile:
  • lazyspice
    lazyspice Posts: 8,258 Member
    I had a hysterectomy 10 years ago and for a while my hormones were all over the place. I found it hard to focus on anything and my motivation hit an all time low.

    Don't be so hard on yourself, take it a day at a time - you'll get there :flowerforyou:
  • brookelynhoneycutt
    brookelynhoneycutt Posts: 22 Member
    My mother has always been a fit person (she is a certified personal trainer), and after her hysterectomy, she gained weight and had a very hard time getting back to the fitness level and weight range where she feels good. After a hysterectomy (or menopause), losing weight can be more difficult due to the changes of hormone levels in your body.

    After my mom got fed up with not making the progress she wanted to see, she had an appointment with a holistic doctor specializing in women's health and got on a regimen to balance out her hormone levels. Since then, she has seen much better results!

    Do not let yourself get discouraged, but sometimes it is more than just being patient, as our bodies are constantly changing through life and the aging process :smile:
  • Keysted
    Keysted Posts: 21 Member
    I live in a northern state and the combination of the weather, losing weight, and other issues that crop up from time to time -with daily living - can be get me down. I talk it out with good friends just like you did with your post. I also keep telling myself to take it one day at a time and do what I need to do for that day only. When I get to feeling bad I try to think of the good things I have - my husband & children, my health, a place to live, my friends, etc. When my focus is on other things rather than on eating and what I can't have I seem to do better. I don't know you or your situation except for what you have described but I am concerned for you. Please keep posting and letting us know how you are, we are all here to help you on your journey.
  • melwa
    melwa Posts: 44 Member
    I hear your frustration. If you believe you're never going to lose weight, you're right. If you believe you've tried everything and nothings worked then there's no hope.
    You need to believe you will drop the excess weight. You need to realise that you just haven't found the way that will work for you.
    This journey is tough, especially when your body's out of whack. But the tough get it done.

    Look at how much you're exercising; look at how much you're eating; look at what you're eating.
    Hook up with people here who are active and have results.

    Come back and tell us what you decide to do in terms of changing behaviors.

    You can do this.
  • skamnorth
    skamnorth Posts: 43
    Emotional binging can be a symtom of low serotine levels. If you feel depressed on top of it all and handle stress badly (also a symptom) then perhaps it is time to go see a doctor about it?

    Good luck to you :heart:
  • katy84o
    katy84o Posts: 744 Member
    It's tough. You will be so proud of yourself if you push through. You are a mother, they need you. They need you to be around, they need you to teach them healthy ways so they do not become overweight as they grow up. Do it for yourself, but do it for your children to.

    This place is great to gain support. But no one here can do it for you. You must have the determination to accomplish this goal. Nothing is wrong with you, you just need to set your priorities and start today. You won't lose it fast, it will take time. Try to learn as much as you can about nutrition and fitness, and what works and doesn't work for you.

    It's your life. Do you want to live healthy?
  • pinkupooh
    pinkupooh Posts: 155
    I like the toothbrush analogy! You do have to be patient and make focused choices several times a day. You are a beautiful woman, and you can be strong! I was in a wheelchair 3 years ago, and now I can ride a horse, walk a mile, lift weights and take care of my children! You never know what is in store for you tomorrow.:flowerforyou:


    very inspiring. Thanks!!! I need motivation as well. At most I have only lost 15 lbs at a time and gain it all back as soon as I go off track. I do want to make life style change and be healthy and energetic as I have 2 little ones to take care.
  • lmckillo
    lmckillo Posts: 127 Member
    Hi, there is absolutely nothing wrong with you, we all go through this at some point. If you think about it, it has taken you a lifetime to get to this point so you really can't expect it to come off in a short period. You have 3 beautiful reasons to keep trying...your kids. There is no substitute for hard work and determination, no pills will every work as well. Being healthy is a not a short term goal, it is a lifetime of eating healthy, being active. Good luck
  • ChristieDF
    ChristieDF Posts: 178 Member
    I thank you all very much. Y'all are so so supportive. I have been under a lot of stress and I have decided that I need to focus on myself for a while. I need to stop trying to fix everybody else's problems. I love my friends but, sometimes they can suck the life out of you. I'm gonna crack the whip on myself. Thank you all so so much!!!! And NO diet pills!!
  • JRaeZins
    JRaeZins Posts: 171 Member
    Keep that beautiful smile on your face and the negative thoughts out of your head!
  • Kisha352
    Kisha352 Posts: 27 Member
    I feel your pain! I am in the same BOAT! I feel like no matter what I do I can't get to 240! Sometimes you just need to pick yourself up and keep on trucking! Smiles Kisha
  • cdreher31
    cdreher31 Posts: 1 Member
    I know exactly how you feel! I feel like every time I make progress, I sabotage it somehow. So, ask yourself where your trouble spots are(mine are munching on food that happens to be around the office, and late night eating) and focus on those things. Research has found that some people are limiters, and some people are abstainers (meaning can you limit yourself to just a little of something, or is it actually easier to give it up all together). I am definitely an abstainer!! It's so much easier for me to say "I will not eat anything that could be considered junk food" than to say "I will have a small handful of these chips and then stop".

    And remember, you are not alone. Half the country is in the same boat!
  • LisaMfit4life
    LisaMfit4life Posts: 567 Member
    HI! Don't be discouraged I know it's easier said than done. What I would recommend is taking a step back and reevaluating your diet. I know you said that you wrote down everything that you were eating? I understand that you are probably using MFP to keep track which is a good thing. What types of food are you eating? How much physical activity are you getting? What are your goals? The secret to success is a combination of nutrition and exercise along with support, motivation and accountability. With your permission I would be more than willing to help you. Personally I had a hysterectomy and I know that hormones can play a major part in weight gain/loss. Your not in this alone so don't beat yourself up over it, because many of us at one point in time have been in your position. The main thing now is not to look back but to move forward. We can't do anything about the past but we are in charge of our future. Take care. I am going to send you a friend request.
    Lisa
  • Ali2165
    Ali2165 Posts: 1 Member
    first of all - give yourself some love. then - try breaking your day down into manageable chunks. Some days for me it's hours - sometimes it's minutes! you can do this.:smooched:
  • yowza101
    yowza101 Posts: 196 Member
    Howdy.. I had a hysterectomy many years ago and I couldn't wait to have it done. But you have to remember that it took years for us to put on this weight so it's going to take time to get it off. I have been a yo-yo dieter to many times to mention. Last year though, my attitude about this changed. I no longer look at this as a diet, this for me is a life style change. Just like with any change it can take months to get it right, not just physically but mentally. Sometimes our goals for weight loss is to high and we need to tone it down some or we will always feel less then when we eat to much in a day.

    There is nothing wrong with you. As a mom and a "fixer" we sometimes put other peoples need in front of our own and we have to learn that we cannot always do that. Your health is your priority. You can't be a good mom if your health is not good, I learned the hard way with that too.

    What I've learned from my health coach of last year. Set your calorie goals and track, track, track. It don't mean that I give up a lot of the things that I love to eat. I love cola, so now instead of drinking a bottle, I drink a can. I love fried chicken, so I just don't eat a lot of it during the week. I love ice cream but don't buy 1/2 gallons. I try to find the single serving kind like Skinny Cow. As you can tell, I don't deprive myself, I just have smaller portions and I got off the couch and made time for working out. I had readjust my time clock to get up a 1/2 hour early to start working out. I split my work outs 1/2 hour in the morning, 1/2 or more in the evening. I love Walking Away the Pounds, you can do those in 15 minutes increments.

    Trust me you will figure it out and stop beating yourself up. Everyone have bad days when that extra helping or sweet tooth kicks in. For me, I don't feel guilty at all...hahahaha. I just know that if I have it, then I have to work out a little bit longer or just do better the next day. We all just have to get back on the horse the next day and get back to being focus. My method may take me longer to get the weight off but I am losing inches and my outlook is much more sunnier then it used to regarding being healthy. Surrounding yourself with people who support you is an extra bonus. On here, we all have been through it at some level.

    Sorry for writing a letter...hahahaha. Just mainly wanted to let you know that you are not alone on this journey and if someone in your personal life isn't supporting you, then log on here and you will have more then you know what to do with...hahahahaha. They say losing 1-2 pounds a week is the healthy way to go. Sometimes you may lose more because of your work outs and eating and sometimes you won't lose anything...just keep on going, it will eventually come off.
  • I know it's hard! Trust me if anyone does its me! I started at 271, and now I am down to 240.5. I just keep myself on a 1500 calorie a day diet and try to walk twice a week. Once it warms up I will walk more. You can still eat what you want, but within your calories. IT WORKS! I am proof! Don't give up!!! Healthy recipes are on here as well. They are helpful.
  • ladydockins
    ladydockins Posts: 12 Member
    Definitely be patient, I get frustrated too sometimes and then I remember it took me years to put this much weight on, it's not going to go away over night, so I tell myself to stay vigilant and optimistic :)
  • jdawn44
    jdawn44 Posts: 1 Member
    Im getting frustrated as well. Ive been at this for probably 6 weeks and have lost 7 pounds but no matter what I do I cant lose anymore.what can I do?
  • mockchoc
    mockchoc Posts: 6,573 Member
    Im getting frustrated as well. Ive been at this for probably 6 weeks and have lost 7 pounds but no matter what I do I cant lose anymore.what can I do?

    Start a thread perhaps, open your diary, give your stats and maybe someone can help you.
  • ChristieDF
    ChristieDF Posts: 178 Member
    Today was awesome!!! I haven't felt this good in a long time. I felt that drive to do what needed to be done. When I took my 15 min break I got on the stationary bike and took off. I'm working 16 hours and I feel great. Thank you all!! God Bless!!!