I don't think I can actually do this

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I'm having quite a low day today and I just need some motivation and guidance.

I know I'm not overweight and don't 'need' to loose weight. I'm 5'6" and currently weigh 140 lbs. My body fat % is 34.2, which I know is high. But I've always wanted to be thinner and better looking.

I've recently joined a gym. And I go whenever I can and I enjoy it. A quick run down of a typical weeks exercise:
Monday: BoxFit class, walking 2 miles (to the bus and back)
Tuesday: Walking 2 miles (to the bus and back)
Wednesday: 10mins on treadmill, Pilates, abs, walking 2 miles (to the bus and back)
Thursday: Walking 2 miles (to the bus and back)
Friday: 30 mins on treadmill, weights, abs, walking 2 miles (to the gym and back)
Saturday: 30 mins on treadmill, weights, abs, walking 2 miles (to the gym and back)
Sunday: 30 mins on treadmill, weights, abs, walking 2 miles (to the gym and back)

Sometimes on Tuesdays and Thursdays I drive to work, so don't do the walking 2 miles. I'm not sure I'm doing enough. It doesn't feel like it.

I'm really struggling with my food. I think I've always struggled with it. Sometime it's by best friend and sometime it's my worst enemy. It just feels stupid to be in this up down relationship with it. It's not a person, it's fuel.

I really struggle to keep my hunger at bay and not go over my calorie limit for the day. My boyfriend encourages me with my exercise but doesn't see the point of calorie counting and doesn't want me to get hung up on it. He's not interested in the calorie content of dinner and will cook what he likes (we share the cooking). But sometime this really pushes me over my calorie limit.

After all that my main point: I've been struggling to loose any weight the last couple of weeks and I'm beginning to think I just can't do it. I've always been this sort of size, fluctuating slightly when I was doing a lot of exercise in uni I just can't see myself with a flat stomach and small, toned arms and legs. Being thin is what other people do.

Replies

  • jamiek917
    jamiek917 Posts: 610 Member
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    your workouts sound really good :)

    can you open your diary? i can try to give you any tips i can if i see what a typical food day entails
  • SJLS2013
    SJLS2013 Posts: 149 Member
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    I've opened my diary
  • KANGOOJUMPS
    KANGOOJUMPS Posts: 6,473 Member
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    BUT YOU CAN!

    BUCKLE DOWN AND FOCUS.
    HOW BAD DO YOU WANT IT?????

    THEN GET IT!
  • Fairyblossom
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    Your exercise does sound great!! If it is a recent gym joining could be muscle gain? Have you taken measurements? Just keep at it (although I am in envy as I am same height and about 50pound heavier lol) . Just keep up all the good work - sometimes it takes the body a bit to catch up to all the effort. :glasses:
  • jamiek917
    jamiek917 Posts: 610 Member
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    it looks like you are in a healthy calorie range, but if u struggle to "keep your hunger at bay" i believe its due to the macro breakdown (carb/fat/protein). your highest calories everyday seem to come from food that often doesnt fill you- cake, bread, chocolate- all things that we love, but rarely fill us up.

    i think you should try a few weeks of changing your macros and making an effort to get close to that breakdown daily (mine is 40%carb/ 25%Fat/ 35% protein). im more full, and i dont feel at all depreived- and still eating food i love. the bulk of your cals are coming from carbs. im not saying u have to go low carb, but i would def take it down a bit while upping your protein (and healthy fat).

    dont give up. my weight loss is going slow too, but from upping weight training and my protein intake and hitting my macros, my clothes are already fitting better.

    you can do this. i promise you. its a process for us all. i may never be a size 6- and im ok with it... but i WILL get to the point where im happier in my own skin. and so will you.
  • Alta2000
    Alta2000 Posts: 655 Member
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    Are you stressed? Your problem lies in the snack section of your meals. A lot of sweet sugary food. Also try to incorporate salads in your meals.
  • KEAPT
    KEAPT Posts: 3
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    I agree with Jaimek, up the protein levels to make you feel fuller for longer.

    On the exercise front, mix up the Friday / Saturday / Sunday. Doing the same thing can dull your motivation:wink: . Is there a class you can join on a Saturday that is upbeat and full of similar minded people? Having a gym buddy can make a huge difference?

    Kx

    Take your measurements (Chest, waist, belly button and hips). Also if poss get someone to take a photo from the front, side, and back in fitted clothes. The best motivation is a visual guide :-)

    :tongue:
  • AQ3107
    AQ3107 Posts: 81 Member
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    How long have you been doing this?
  • KEAPT
    KEAPT Posts: 3
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    I agree with Jaimek, up the protein levels to make you feel fuller for longer.

    On the exercise front, mix up the Friday / Saturday / Sunday. Doing the same thing can dull your motivation:wink: . Is there a class you can join on a Saturday that is upbeat and full of similar minded people? Having a gym buddy can make a huge difference?

    Kxjavascript:add_smiley('wink','post_body')

    Take your measurements (Chest, waist, belly button and hips). Also if poss get someone to take a photo from the front, side, and back in fitted clothes. The best motivation is a visual guide :-)
  • yellowsnowdrop
    yellowsnowdrop Posts: 154 Member
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    YES YOU CAN DO IT. You're not really overweight and if you REALLY need some motivation read the blogs of folk who've lost upwards of 70lbs or so. If they and indeed I can do it then so can you. Your exercise diary is phenominal and I truly wish I could exercise like that (I have severe disc problems) If you really want it bad enough then you'll just go for it, nothing comes to those who just sit and wait.
    GOOD LUCK
  • neandermagnon
    neandermagnon Posts: 7,436 Member
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    for your workouts, doing weights on 3 consecutive days, are you doing a whole body workout or a split routine? If it's a whole body workout, it might be better (if you can) to do them on three non-consecutive days (e.g. mon, wed, fri) to give your muscles time to recover in between. the rest of it looks like fairly light cardio so won't interfere with recovery, however you are doing a lot of exercise overall, and walking may be light cardio but it adds up, so my suggestions are as follows:

    - are you eating enough to sustain your activity levels? what activity factor are you using to calculate your calories? If you're using the MFP settings, are you eating back your exercise calories?

    - it might be better to have a day off from exercise once a week. you don't have to go at this full steam ahead every day, your body repairs itself when you rest. it also gives you a psychological break,which it sounds like you need, because you're running out of motivation (sometimes that's simply a sign of mental/emotional exhaustion). People can make remarkable transformations without working out 7 days a week. It's a matter of doing the right kinds of exercise (like weight training) and eating right, and giving your body time to recover. Less is more, sometimes, provided the less that you do is done right.

    If you haven't seen the "in place of a road map" thread yet, please check it out.
  • wllwsmmr
    wllwsmmr Posts: 391 Member
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    Hey! Opening your diary would be good so others including me could see if we could help directly!

    Another thing would be good to find out why you find eating a struggle. Your best friend...? It'd be good if you could elaborate!
    Also, are you struggling to stay within your caloric goals because you binge/can't give up certain foods/feel pressured to eat/overeat? If so, why do you do so? Are you stressed by something, eating out of boredom or?

    Also, with regards to your boyfriend, do you eat with him everyday? If yes, you could suggest eating different stuff but together at times. And when you do eat what he cooks, try to find out what he is cooking and track the calories! Make sure you're eating a reasonable amount and that it fits into your caloric goals! Let him know that counting calories is not gonna affect the dynamics of your relationship! It is nice that he is supportive of your exercising :) Not everyone gets on board with calorie counting/healthy eating etc so don't get too frustrated with that! Try to convince him that this makes you happy, you are trying to improve your health and how you view yourself, improving yourself and trying to become happier! It'd be nice if he doesn't discourage you in anyway, but in any case remember you're doing it for yourself and that you're worth the effort and you should not give up because of external factors! It may be hard, but definitely not reason to give up becoming a better and happier person :)

    Your exercise plan sounds amazing and I am sure that would help with your body fat %!! You might not see weight loss but you might see inches dropping!!

    **EDIT: Oops sorry I see that you've opened your diary!! If you're struggling with hunger, you could try switching your macros as other posters have said! Also, if it is simply wanting to eat more, you could substitute a portion to healthier stuff like fruits for sweet foods because you can get more for the same amount of calories! A little change a day will go a long way! And to be honest there is no harm in trying right? At most you maintain at what seems like a decent comfortable weight. If you do lose slowly, it just takes time, but you will still get there! Exercising and eating well also does wonders to your energy levels, health, skin etc! Just do it in a way that minimizes frustration, makes you feel better about yourself and not burnt out :)
  • SJLS2013
    SJLS2013 Posts: 149 Member
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    "Are you stressed? Your problem lies in the snack section of your meals. A lot of sweet sugary food. Also try to incorporate salads in your meals. "

    This actually made me cry!

    I have been extremely stressed this week. Mostly because of work. I think I've been trying to ignore it because everyone else at work is in the same boat.
  • SJLS2013
    SJLS2013 Posts: 149 Member
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    Thank you so much for the replies. It has really helped. To answer a couple of questions:

    I used MFP to calculate my daily calories. I do eat back my exercise calories.

    Unfortunately my gym is very busy during the week so weekends or early mornings are the only time I can use all the equipment I want.

    I have taken my measurements and photos to track my progress.

    Stress has been a problem for me at the moment, mostly from work.But work are aware it's been stressful and are working to resolve things. I don't think I've allowed myself to deal with the stress though and it's been going back to eating unhealthily to cope so this is defiantly something for me to focus on.

    Some really good comments for me to work on, so thank you.
  • Alta2000
    Alta2000 Posts: 655 Member
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    I gained most of the weight the last couple of years as I was undergoing a lot of stress. I guess the cortisol levels went through the roof. Try to sleep 7-8 hours, having a full continuous sleep at night. Try to relax. I know it is hard.
  • Lulzaroonie
    Lulzaroonie Posts: 222 Member
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    You and I are the same height OP, and I haven't been your weight in about 4/5 years.
    I think you're doing a fantastic job, but sometimes it is hard to keep swimming when we have a hectic life to lead.
    Go easy on yourself, the world can wait. Take some you time and refresh yourself.
  • Chockystarrfizz
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    Sharing meals can always be difficult, if one person has to watch calories. Here's a tip. Start off with a big green salad (go easy on the dressing). This can be thrown together in a flash. And then eat the actual meal that your boyfriend cooked. You will probably only manage to eat half the usual portion. Better still, get him to partake in sharing that big salad first. If you worry about insulting your boyfriend and his efforts, get a takeaway container and say that his cooking is so good, you want to save some to bring to work tomorrow!

    Good luck and don't give up. You CAN do it!
  • lambchoplewis
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    You can do this!! I started putting my protein on top of a HUGE salad with balsamic vinegar as the dressing. This gets me really filled up and I get my protein. Just tell your boyfriend that weight loss is the balance food and exercise.

    Calories In - Calories out (exercise) = weight (gain or loss)!!!

    Pretty easy to understand - not as easy to do!!

    Don't Give UP!!!
  • BflSaberfan
    BflSaberfan Posts: 1,272
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    Thank you so much for the replies. It has really helped. To answer a couple of questions:

    I used MFP to calculate my daily calories. I do eat back my exercise calories.

    Unfortunately my gym is very busy during the week so weekends or early mornings are the only time I can use all the equipment I want.

    I have taken my measurements and photos to track my progress.

    Stress has been a problem for me at the moment, mostly from work.But work are aware it's been stressful and are working to resolve things. I don't think I've allowed myself to deal with the stress though and it's been going back to eating unhealthily to cope so this is defiantly something for me to focus on.

    Some really good comments for me to work on, so thank you.

    I have a very stressful job, and I have two kids at home, and I'm trying to lose weight I completely understand how you are feeling. I know you're struggling with the calorie counting and trying to stay active but do you ever just fill the tub, and sit, and play some music? You NEED down time. Schedule it! It really helps me. the most important things to be are getting enough sleep and taking a hot bath at least once a week to relax my body and mind.