Belittling others to make yourself seem more important?

2

Replies

  • chocl8girl
    chocl8girl Posts: 1,968 Member
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    Might be time for some big girl panties.
  • edge_dragoncaller
    edge_dragoncaller Posts: 826 Member
    Or..... D) The thread was ridiculous and you weren't belittling anyone but some sensitive soul thinks disagreeing with someone is bulling.
    E) None of the above.

    Man up, this is the internet.

    I just wanted to say...

    I think it's hilarious when a woman tells another woman to "man" up.
  • LaLouve_RK
    LaLouve_RK Posts: 899 Member
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  • bluefox9er
    bluefox9er Posts: 2,917 Member
    I have a pretty thick skin so stuff that some people on here ramble about doesn't bug me. But my commentary on some of the behavior is that it seems like people seek out threads where they can humiliate and belittle people. I say this because if they thought a post was dumb, they could have very easily just moved on, but they don't. Now some have actual constructive criticism for people, these people I am not addressing. I see nothing wrong with difference of opinion or pointing out ignorance.

    My problem is with those who seem to seek out threads just to try and make crass jokes, insulting innuendo, or to make sure people think something/someone is stupid.

    So I ask...
    Is this done because...

    A. You actually think it's funny to mock or humiliate people.
    B. You feel like a more important person because you were able to belittle someone.
    C. Or do you dislike yourself so much that in putting others down, you rise up.

    I am just curious, and serious. Because I see grown adults treat people on MFP in ways they would never treat people face to face. At times coming to the thread feels like nursery school :( And yes I expect to be bashed, humiliated, blah blah blah, loads of hate. I don't care about all that. I really think some of you may need some introspection and a reminder that everyone here is here because they lack control over food. Don't replace that lack of control while you get your nutrition in check with losing control of your tongues, your humanity and your ego's, please, for everyone's sake. This site is about empowerment, but not about senseless cruel mockery.

    when you see threads like " how many calories would I be over by if I ate a baby" or " what song do you like to strip off to", there is no option open but to call out the poster as a moron.
  • Iron_Duchess
    Iron_Duchess Posts: 429 Member
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    ^^^ This^^^ Another one? this is how it works: Search/mean people/ 1,000,000 results/ pick one and read on. We get a few of these threads daily. So boring...
  • NavyKnightAh13
    NavyKnightAh13 Posts: 1,394 Member
    I was told once (not on here but in a class I took through the community college here) that its the internet and more often then not you will never likely meet the people in person therefore it is okay to be blunt and honest and not really care.

    While I didn't agree with all of it, I have no problem being blunt and honest, and if someone doesn't like it, then go to the land of sugar coating. I hate it when someone sugar codes crap for me and get angry at them for it. I would rather someone be honest and it sting a little then for someone to say otherwise. Some people can't handle it for whatever reason. I don't think I have belittled anyone (honestly if I did I'm sorry) but this is the real world, and sadly real world isn't rainbows and sunshine; its filled with trolls and gladiators.
  • rob1976
    rob1976 Posts: 1,328 Member
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  • CrazyTrackLady
    CrazyTrackLady Posts: 1,337 Member
    I'm a big believer in speaking or providing the truth when what is being said is obviously very, very wrong. Call me an intellectual snob, a show off, or rude, but when I see posts that insist ridiculous things can happen or have happened (I ate green tea pills, worked out for 2 hours every day for months, and lost 20 lbs -- BECAUSE OF THE GREEN TEA!), then YES, I am ethically obligated to say something to the masses who fall for the ridiculousness.

    As I would expect others to do the same for me when I occasionally fail in my own enlightenment.
  • askeates
    askeates Posts: 1,490 Member
    Unfortunately it seems like no matter what the post is about, there will always be at least 1 negative Nelly to mess it up for everyone else... and you have hit the nail on the head with all 3 of your call-outs!

    Sad to say, I have found that the ones that are the meanest are also the ones that will in fact say it to your face thinking they are the biggest baddest SOB around!

    I have just gotten to the point where certain people that I see, I will just skip over their posts.... I like the helpful and supportive people that I have found for the most part here. Makes asking questions not so scary! Like many others, I would prefer the truth... but the truth doesn't have to be nasty. I think there is a good way and a bad way to approach things... TACT is sometimes needed.
  • CrazyTrackLady
    CrazyTrackLady Posts: 1,337 Member
    I have a pretty thick skin so stuff that some people on here ramble about doesn't bug me. But my commentary on some of the behavior is that it seems like people seek out threads where they can humiliate and belittle people. I say this because if they thought a post was dumb, they could have very easily just moved on, but they don't. Now some have actual constructive criticism for people, these people I am not addressing. I see nothing wrong with difference of opinion or pointing out ignorance.

    My problem is with those who seem to seek out threads just to try and make crass jokes, insulting innuendo, or to make sure people think something/someone is stupid.

    So I ask...
    Is this done because...

    A. You actually think it's funny to mock or humiliate people.
    B. You feel like a more important person because you were able to belittle someone.
    C. Or do you dislike yourself so much that in putting others down, you rise up.

    I am just curious, and serious. Because I see grown adults treat people on MFP in ways they would never treat people face to face. At times coming to the thread feels like nursery school :( And yes I expect to be bashed, humiliated, blah blah blah, loads of hate. I don't care about all that. I really think some of you may need some introspection and a reminder that everyone here is here because they lack control over food. Don't replace that lack of control while you get your nutrition in check with losing control of your tongues, your humanity and your ego's, please, for everyone's sake. This site is about empowerment, but not about senseless cruel mockery.

    when you see threads like " how many calories would I be over by if I ate a baby" or " what song do you like to strip off to", there is no option open but to call out the poster as a moron.

    THIS!!! And anything that contains the following words: "Well, Dr. Oz had it on his show, so it MUST work..."
  • _chiaroscuro
    _chiaroscuro Posts: 1,340 Member
    OP sorry to answer your question with a question but I'm gonna because it's been baffling to me.

    If you really, REALLY see something so appalling on these forums that qualifies as rudeness you can't ignore, or cruelty, or as you said, losing one's humanity (questionable), why run off and start a separate thread bemoaning the issue? The whole forum's public, why not voice your opinion to the offender, right there, in that thread?

    That just makes more sense to me and has a better chance of addressing a specific situation rather than just finger-wagging in general which solves nothing.

    Edit because I had some sort of comma episode I need to mop up.
  • Muddy_Yogi
    Muddy_Yogi Posts: 1,459 Member
    I have a pretty thick skin so stuff that some people on here ramble about doesn't bug me. But my commentary on some of the behavior is that it seems like people seek out threads where they can humiliate and belittle people. I say this because if they thought a post was dumb, they could have very easily just moved on, but they don't. Now some have actual constructive criticism for people, these people I am not addressing. I see nothing wrong with difference of opinion or pointing out ignorance.

    My problem is with those who seem to seek out threads just to try and make crass jokes, insulting innuendo, or to make sure people think something/someone is stupid.

    So I ask...
    Is this done because...

    A. You actually think it's funny to mock or humiliate people.
    B. You feel like a more important person because you were able to belittle someone.
    C. Or do you dislike yourself so much that in putting others down, you rise up.

    I am just curious, and serious. Because I see grown adults treat people on MFP in ways they would never treat people face to face. At times coming to the thread feels like nursery school :( And yes I expect to be bashed, humiliated, blah blah blah, loads of hate. I don't care about all that. I really think some of you may need some introspection and a reminder that everyone here is here because they lack control over food. Don't replace that lack of control while you get your nutrition in check with losing control of your tongues, your humanity and your ego's, please, for everyone's sake. This site is about empowerment, but not about senseless cruel mockery.

    I think you may have a problem with a number of assumptions about this site and it's purpose.

    A. Not everyone is here because they lack control over food.
    B. I don't think it's possible for anyone to "lose their humanity" here provided they don't start actively tracking down and murdering MFP members. And if I haven't done that yet no one else has an excuse to either.
    C. This site is not about empowerment. It's about counting calories. That's not to say you can't find success and be empowered here. But don't make it out to be more than it is. Oprah is not coming by any time soon.

    Instead of railing against the world because not everyone is nice, maybe try changing your own expectations. This is not the grand arena and it's best not to take it too seriously. You can't control what anyone else posts, but you can control your own reactions to it.

    Brett....nail on the head!

    People cannot cause you to react a certain way. That is your doing. You choose how you feel or react to any given situation.
  • sunsnstatheart
    sunsnstatheart Posts: 2,544 Member
    Funny, my reaction is often more one of pure pity. People who cannot deal with MFP's forums are ill equipped for handling other people IRL.
  • SpeSHul_SnoflEHk
    SpeSHul_SnoflEHk Posts: 6,256 Member
    I just think I am a sort of funny semi-jerk. I treat people I know in real life with the same sarcasm as I do on here.

    That's the part I don't get. I treat everyone the same way here or IRL. I am what I am . In my upbringing, you treat the ones you love with ribbing and sarcasm. It was that way in my whole family. If someone wasn't being snarky, you wondered what you di dto piss them off. It's the way I show love. My love language is giving poop. So, when I respond to my friends here even in the public forums, I may trash talk and get snarky.

    If I don't like you, or know you yet, I will be civil and curt with my replies. I do have a problem with loyalty though. If I have someone I like and consider my friend being attacked, I tend to open up with canned a-hole. I do the same fo rmy patients who can't advocate for themselves when a provider is being stupid, and trying to mess them up. It happens. I'm sorry I am not a perfect being. It's the way I treat people. When I do treat people badly, it is for what I consider the right reason.
  • quirkytizzy
    quirkytizzy Posts: 4,052 Member
    Funny, my reaction is often more one of pure pity. People who cannot deal with MFP's forums are ill equipped for handling other people IRL.

    About my reaction. If they crumble like this here, what happens to the jerk who steps on your foot in the grocery store and doesn't apologize? Do you immediately start shouting to the ENTIRE grocery store about how mean people are?

    Doesn't that kind of **** get you arrested?
  • Jebbster007
    Jebbster007 Posts: 265 Member
    Wait.......people are actually mean on the internet?????
  • ILiftHeavyAcrylics
    ILiftHeavyAcrylics Posts: 27,732 Member
    Could you offer an example or two OP?
  • oregonzoo
    oregonzoo Posts: 4,251 Member
    Funny, my reaction is often more one of pure pity. People who cannot deal with MFP's forums are ill equipped for handling other people IRL.
    I've never understood how those who cry this place is "mean" even get up out of bed. Not to say the boards are always rainbows and sunshine. But nor is the world.
  • NutellaAddict
    NutellaAddict Posts: 1,258 Member
    :sad: wahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh wahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
  • DavPul
    DavPul Posts: 61,406 Member
    ...... Because I see grown adults treat people on MFP in ways they would never treat people face to face.

    I am so much ruder face to face. I mean, if you can't toughen up to a little snark in tha internets, what are you going to do when I'm just staring at you with one eyebrow raised for like 15 seconds before I start answering your question?

    I like your question about the difference between real life and the internet tho. I have one myself. In real life, are people so sensitive that they burst into tears whenever someone doesn't agree with them? Thread after thread about mean people being mean cannot possibly have a real life equivalent, can it? What do you do when you get cut off in traffic? When you the line you choose at the grocery store moves slower than the other lines? When you get passed up for promotion? When somebody else ate the last slice of cake?

    Is it:
    A: You've lead such a sheltered and privileged life that tha Internets is the first time you've ever encountered resistance?
    B: You have no sense of humor and the slightest joke/innuendo/sarcarm makes you break down and cry?
    C: You really have encountered mean people in real life but you had no forum to complain about it until you found the internets?

    That question isn't just for the OP. It's for everybody that gets the urge to start one of these threads. There's an infinite amount of helpful information and support on this site. If only you'd stop whining and listen to it.

    mKin9O6.gif
  • emily356
    emily356 Posts: 318 Member
    I like humor. If something is funny I'm going to say it.....unless it's too bad and then I won't.....I do have a censor......I would expect someone else to do the same about me. If it's hurtful and not humorous that's not ok, but as long as it's funny people need to understand it's worth it.





    M.F.P. Hottest Person/M.F.P. Most awesome person
    Ice cream afficionado
    "Winning" Certified Instructor
    > 1 Year Consecutive Logging
    Been in gifs for 2 years and have studied custom gif creation
    jac-mr-mfp-o.gif

    hmmm, I know you said something there Jac, but I'm too busy watching the gif...:flowerforyou:

    I know!! His gif is so funny, that I have to watch the whole thing through every time I see it!:laugh:
  • quirkytizzy
    quirkytizzy Posts: 4,052 Member
    ...... Because I see grown adults treat people on MFP in ways they would never treat people face to face.

    I am so much ruder face to face. I mean, if you can't toughen up to a little snark in tha internets, what are you going to do when I'm just staring at you with one eyebrow raised for like 15 seconds before I start answering your question?

    I like your question about the difference between real life and the internet tho. I have one myself. In real life, are people so sensitive that they burst into tears whenever someone doesn't agree with them? Thread after thread about mean people being mean cannot possibly have a real life equivalent, can it? What do you do when you get cut off in traffic? When you the line you choose at the grocery store moves slower than the other lines? When you get passed up for promotion? When somebody else ate the last slice of cake?

    Is it:
    A: You've lead such a sheltered and privileged life that tha Internets is the first time you've ever encountered resistance?
    B: You have no sense of humor and the slightest joke/innuendo/sarcarm makes you break down and cry?
    C: You really have encountered mean people in real life but you had no forum to complain about it until you found the internets


    That question isn't just for the OP. It's for everybody that gets the urge to start one of these threads. There's an infinite amount of helpful information and support on this site. If only you'd stop whining and listen to it.

    mKin9O6.gif

    I believe for many posters, those answers are YES and D - All of the Above.

    Also, great gif! <3
  • theCarlton
    theCarlton Posts: 1,344 Member
    I actually am super important, but it's not from belittling others. I was born this way. *hair-flip*
  • quirkytizzy
    quirkytizzy Posts: 4,052 Member
    Pimping out this gif because I love it so much and it explains how I feel about this thread (and the other one now):

    sG6oj.gif

    Time for a nap.
  • I tend to think that if you are truly getting that upset about what someone thinks about you solely from an internet message board, someone you more than likely have never met and possibly will never meet than you maybe do not have as thick skin as you think you have.

    I do not put a lot of stock in anyones' comments on here.
  • K_Serz
    K_Serz Posts: 1,299 Member
    Same MFP post about people being rude........different day.....except we lost an hour (damn you Arizona & Hawaii)
  • Jacwhite22
    Jacwhite22 Posts: 7,010 Member
    I like humor. If something is funny I'm going to say it.....unless it's too bad and then I won't.....I do have a censor......I would expect someone else to do the same about me. If it's hurtful and not humorous that's not ok, but as long as it's funny people need to understand it's worth it.





    M.F.P. Hottest Person/M.F.P. Most awesome person
    Ice cream afficionado
    "Winning" Certified Instructor
    > 1 Year Consecutive Logging
    Been in gifs for 2 years and have studied custom gif creation
    jac-mr-mfp-o.gif

    hmmm, I know you said something there Jac, but I'm too busy watching the gif...:flowerforyou:

    Heh. ;) TY.
  • rob1976
    rob1976 Posts: 1,328 Member
    I actually am super important, but it's not from belittling others. I was born this way. *hair-flip*
    tumblr_mcbx06lgYp1qj4520.gif
  • cmriverside
    cmriverside Posts: 34,458 Member
    I have no patience when this is the third one of thses today.


    Stop looking for problems where none exist.


    tumblr_lps1z6iX9E1r1p2kzo1_500.jpg
  • Jacwhite22
    Jacwhite22 Posts: 7,010 Member
    I like humor. If something is funny I'm going to say it.....unless it's too bad and then I won't.....I do have a censor......I would expect someone else to do the same about me. If it's hurtful and not humorous that's not ok, but as long as it's funny people need to understand it's worth it.





    M.F.P. Hottest Person/M.F.P. Most awesome person
    Ice cream afficionado
    "Winning" Certified Instructor
    > 1 Year Consecutive Logging
    Been in gifs for 2 years and have studied custom gif creation
    jac-mr-mfp-o.gif

    hmmm, I know you said something there Jac, but I'm too busy watching the gif...:flowerforyou:

    I know!! His gif is so funny, that I have to watch the whole thing through every time I see it!:laugh:

    Awwe. TY. Is it bad that I watch it/chuckle when I post it still?
This discussion has been closed.