eating more than my partner/ eating disorder household :)

petstorekitty
petstorekitty Posts: 592 Member
in Motivation and Support
yesterday I ate within my calorie goal and all that and I was eating almost twice as much as my partner.
It was.... awkward!

let me preface this with I am 5'1" and 127 and he is 6'3" and 180.
He supposed to eat so much more than me but some days he eats like a little bird and I feel like the giant seagull in the parking lot nomming on ALL THE SEEDS!!!!!!!

I tease him about his bird-like eating a lot - he's the kind of guy that will skip breakfast or just forget to eat till dinnertime b/c he's busy! Then our cat vomits a lot so I tease her about being bulimic and that I live in an eating disorder household.

I'm not usually so insecure about this, but yesterday it just got to me.

Most of the time I hear about how girls are sad they have so eat so much less than their partners. Anyone else ever have the opposite???

Replies

  • cmriverside
    cmriverside Posts: 34,419 Member
    Take your cat to the vet. They shouldn't be vomiting all the time. More than once every two weeks, and she's probably sick.


    I loved the seagull thing. Just grab the food and say, "MINE!"
  • NJL13500
    NJL13500 Posts: 433 Member
    This is me too. My fiance doesn't get hungry and forgets to eat ALL DAY. This never happens to me. I feel like "How the heck can you FORGET to eat?". My stomach growls and reminds me. Most days he eats half the calories that I do. I'm 5'6' and 130 and I eat around 2,000 per day. He says that he isn't trying to not eat and that it just happens.

    Crazy!
  • Valerie_Malone
    Valerie_Malone Posts: 59 Member
    Yea, I know how it is, my husband is like this. I feel like I eat like the man and he eats like the woman. But I don't let it get to me.
  • ladymiseryali
    ladymiseryali Posts: 2,555 Member
    Take your cat to the vet. They shouldn't be vomiting all the time. More than once every two weeks, and she's probably sick.


    I loved the seagull thing. Just grab the food and say, "MINE!"

    I second the vet. Cats are notorious for hiding their illnesses until it's really bad. If she's vomiting a lot, then a vet visit is in order, rather than teasing the poor thing.
  • petstorekitty
    petstorekitty Posts: 592 Member
    This is me too. My fiance doesn't get hungry and forgets to eat ALL DAY. This never happens to me. I feel like "How the heck can you FORGET to eat?". My stomach growls and reminds me. Most days he eats half the calories that I do. I'm 5'6' and 130 and I eat around 2,000 per day. He says that he isn't trying to not eat and that it just happens.

    Crazy!


    lol! omg, me every day!
  • RamaOtster
    RamaOtster Posts: 5
    Lol me too!

    I guess the difference is that DH is eating a handful of chips and I'm eating a huge homemade granola bar so technically mine is still less calories than his it just looks worse lol
  • blues4miles
    blues4miles Posts: 1,481 Member
    Take your cat to the vet. They shouldn't be vomiting all the time. More than once every two weeks, and she's probably sick.


    I loved the seagull thing. Just grab the food and say, "MINE!"

    I second the vet. Cats are notorious for hiding their illnesses until it's really bad. If she's vomiting a lot, then a vet visit is in order, rather than teasing the poor thing.

    Eh, some amount of vomiting is pretty normal in a cat. If the cat appears to be eating enough and not any more tired than normal I wouldn't worry about it. My cat now probably throws up on average once a week, likely due to her long fur. My old kitty was born feral and used to eat as much dry food as she possibly could which would then often result in her throwing up from eating too much. So I know how it is to have a binging/purging cat.

    Can't help on the SO thing. Except to guess that possibly like many long-term dieters his metabolism has now slowed to whatever his current intake typically is. My cat's really skinny and at first we just tried to lay out more food but that didn't work. The vet advised us to sort of exercise the cat a couple times a day because that might actually encourage an appetite. Maybe you could try the same thing with your SO? :laugh:
  • petstorekitty
    petstorekitty Posts: 592 Member
    Take your cat to the vet. They shouldn't be vomiting all the time. More than once every two weeks, and she's probably sick.


    I loved the seagull thing. Just grab the food and say, "MINE!"

    I second the vet. Cats are notorious for hiding their illnesses until it's really bad. If she's vomiting a lot, then a vet visit is in order, rather than teasing the poor thing.

    Yeah, there are two cats actually. One tends to over eat and then she vomits. I think she had abandonment issues. It has gotten much better recently - we monitor her & her food and snacks.

    The other one is older and fluffy. Usually it's just a hairball here and there but she goes in stages of getting sick more regularly. She'll be fine for months then all of a sudden, a couple times a week.
    When I take her to the vet they tell me she's perfectly healthy :(

    Aside from keeping her clean and watching her eating more closely i'm not sure what elese to do :'(
  • crystalflame
    crystalflame Posts: 1,049 Member
    I'm 5'5". My boyfriend's 6'2" and eats way less than me. I run and lift, and he just sits around all day, so it kind of makes sense... It doesn't bother me unless he tells me to put the cookie down because he doesn't want me to freak out over gaining a pound :grumble:
  • petstorekitty
    petstorekitty Posts: 592 Member
    Take your cat to the vet. They shouldn't be vomiting all the time. More than once every two weeks, and she's probably sick.


    I loved the seagull thing. Just grab the food and say, "MINE!"

    I second the vet. Cats are notorious for hiding their illnesses until it's really bad. If she's vomiting a lot, then a vet visit is in order, rather than teasing the poor thing.

    Eh, some amount of vomiting is pretty normal in a cat. If the cat appears to be eating enough and not any more tired than normal I wouldn't worry about it. My cat now probably throws up on average once a week, likely due to her long fur. My old kitty was born feral and used to eat as much dry food as she possibly could which would then often result in her throwing up from eating too much. So I know how it is to have a binging/purging cat.

    Can't help on the SO thing. Except to guess that possibly like many long-term dieters his metabolism has now slowed to whatever his current intake typically is. My cat's really skinny and at first we just tried to lay out more food but that didn't work. The vet advised us to sort of exercise the cat a couple times a day because that might actually encourage an appetite. Maybe you could try the same thing with your SO? :laugh:

    hehehe. I could use the laser pointer on the BF. Yeah the binge & purge kitty was 2nd generation from feral. Her momma was a street kitty.

    You have a good suggestion about his metabolism though. He says I have greatly improved how healthy he eats. Overtime I'm sure it will adjust just like I did.
  • petstorekitty
    petstorekitty Posts: 592 Member
    I'm 5'5". My boyfriend's 6'2" and eats way less than me. I run and lift, and he just sits around all day, so it kind of makes sense... It doesn't bother me unless he tells me to put the cookie down because he doesn't want me to freak out over gaining a pound :grumble:


    Haha my boyfriend puts the chips on very high shelves so I don't see them, b/c he knows I'll totally eat all of them and be sad. :P

    You have a great point. He does computer consulting and doesn't go to the gym where as I workout 5ish days a week :):)
  • carissawhitworth
    carissawhitworth Posts: 58
    You shouldnt feel self concious around your partner. I hope he is not making you feel this way. You are eating helathy. When you are hungry you should eat! I eat more than my hubby but he snacks on CRAP and Im chowing down on salads, and wraps, and fruit and yogurt. He actually trys to make me enjoy junk with him that is the real problem LOL. You should have no reason to feel self concious about what you eat in front of your partner when partaking in a healty co-habitation with a partner. People eat ;) Sometimes alot sometimes at all. It is important to not feel judged or un comfortable in your own home. Maybe you need to think about why you feel this way? Have you been together a long time? Has he made comments about your weight or appearance?
  • petstorekitty
    petstorekitty Posts: 592 Member
    You shouldnt feel self concious around your partner. I hope he is not making you feel this way. You are eating helathy. When you are hungry you should eat! I eat more than my hubby but he snacks on CRAP and Im chowing down on salads, and wraps, and fruit and yogurt. He actually trys to make me enjoy junk with him that is the real problem LOL. You should have no reason to feel self concious about what you eat in front of your partner when partaking in a healty co-habitation with a partner. People eat ;) Sometimes alot sometimes at all. It is important to not feel judged or un comfortable in your own home. Maybe you need to think about why you feel this way? Have you been together a long time? Has he made comments about your weight or appearance?

    He doesn't make negative comments about what I eat. Surprisingly for a guy he's super motivational and helpful. He never questions me if I want more or less food. And he is always very positive when it comes to my body :}

    We've been dating for a year and living together for a few months.
    It did take some getting used to for him to realize how I eat at home (versus when we were just dating and going out)
    And to get used to making dinner in reasonable portion sizes. And It's been weird for me getting used to having snacks in the house. Not my thing, ya know? Mostly he snacks on things I don't even like so it's safe.


    Some days I am just insecure. You are right I have no reason to feel that way. I do need to figure where it's coming from. I used to be *SUPER* insecure. I think it just peeks out now and again.

    I will think about it some more and discuss it with him too. For all I know he may be feeling insucure too.
    :)
  • RojaBlaze
    RojaBlaze Posts: 7
    SAME!! I feel like I'm eating all day long and I have to fight to get breakfast into my fiance every day and before I made a stink about it, he didn't take lunch to work either. He would basically starve all day and then eat a ton a night. Now he eats breakfast and lunch and more reasonable dinners but he never snacks.
    Just to give you some stats on him, he's 6ft 4" and about 320lbs. He's trying to lose weight as well but I think the problem is that his calorie goal is like 2200 and he sometimes doesn't even get to 1200 and if he does it's because he's eating junk.

    PS: One of my cats is legit bulimic. I will watch her eat and eat and eat and then walk about 4 steps and throw it back up. She doesn't do it often but enough that I know she has a problem. lol
  • petstorekitty
    petstorekitty Posts: 592 Member
    SAME!! I feel like I'm eating all day long and I have to fight to get breakfast into my fiance every day and before I made a stink about it, he didn't take lunch to work either. He would basically starve all day and then eat a ton a night. Now he eats breakfast and lunch and more reasonable dinners but he never snacks.
    Just to give you some stats on him, he's 6ft 4" and about 320lbs. He's trying to lose weight as well but I think the problem is that his calorie goal is like 2200 and he sometimes doesn't even get to 1200 and if he does it's because he's eating junk.

    PS: One of my cats is legit bulimic. I will watch her eat and eat and eat and then walk about 4 steps and throw it back up. She doesn't do it often but enough that I know she has a problem. lol

    Ok I know I am really not alone in boyfriend OR cat land. lol!
    The boy used to be very heavy before we dated. He said he'd eat like 1/2 sandwich a day. *I would die!!*
    He went through a lot before me so I think in reality his habits are not terrible. Luckily he likes healthy and even vegetarian foods so healthy dinners are no problem. Still when I eat all of mine and he doesn't I'm like.. -__-
    It makes me double check my calories..

    I think the kitten yakked up in her food bowl once, she didn't have time to step back I guess.
  • penguinlibrarian
    penguinlibrarian Posts: 33 Member
    Um, yes, can totally relate. In the morning my eyes pop awake and my brain screams 'FOOOOD! Get thee to the kitchen!!' and I scurry in there like it's been years since I've eaten. I start ripping into the salami, the peanut butter, a string cheese stick why not, guacamole & chips....I'm pretty sure I eat more breakfast calories than my partner eats in his entire day.

    He has Irritiable Bowel Syndrome, but I have Irritable Female Syndrome. It bugs me to no end and creeps me out that I can eat 10x more than him. I always grew up in a home where the dudes go back for 2nds, 3rds, etc. So I feel like I'm eating like 'the man' and I hate that, but I'm just always hungry! And I love food!!

    He simply forgets to eat alot of days. Many days he doesn't eat a bite until 2 or 3pm....I would be sobbing hysterically if I had to go that long without food, but it really just doesn't cross his mind. And when he DOES eat, he doesnt want to eat very much, because Irritable Bowel Syndrome SUCKS and basically everything sends him running to the bathroom, sick and in pain.
    The end!

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