Is this a big enough wake up call?

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farmers_daughter
farmers_daughter Posts: 1,632 Member
in Motivation and Support
Input from those who have experienced this would be appreciated:

My 7 year old daughter is probably going thru a growth spurt... But with me trying to get myself on track....I see it differently and let's just say I hope this "click" really stays.

She's always been the skinny "wormy" one. Picky eater, eats barely anything, and the same size as her 18 month younger sister. All of the sudden (call me a bad mom for now noticing this but whatever...) she no longer fits in her clothes. So we go thrift shop browsing for jeans, 3 sizes later we find some that fit, but are a foot too long. So she feels kind of embarassed and I'm horrified...that she's this way because of me. We know we can't blame the school, they serve a balanced meal...so it's me. Obviously.

Again, I pray this is a "spurt" but if it's not... how horrible am I for giving my child the worst possible start in life. I would describe the pain that she's going to go through but many of you already know about it. It's indescribeable.

I have to get my **** together, I have to retrain all 3 of us on how to eat, what to eat...the school tries but I'm the horrible mother who puts semi half assed healthy crap on their plates. I say I try. I've failed. I'll keep failing until I can't try anymore.
I'm done. I'm disgusted with myself, and I'm just done.
I refuse to be one that puts seeds, flax, organic, bullcrap in our food. We go back to how we were raised on the farm. If it comes from OUR animals then we can eat it. If it came from OUR garden we'll eat it. We may not have animals or a garden, but I can.
I'm not going to "city-fy" us....I can do this. Portion sizes are my own personal enemy, I've got to get this under control.

Who really wants to admit that they made thier child miserable because they couldn't get thier own **** together enough? I refuse to admit that. I'm done.

Maybe someone can use this as motivation, but hearing from anyone who has been in a similar situation would be great.

Replies

  • telt4
    telt4 Posts: 18 Member
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    My oldest daughter was the exact same way when she was younger and stayed that way til she went to college. She was so picky about what she ate and would hardly eat anything. I blame that on myself because I went by the book with her since she was my first child. However my second daughter we started feeding her from the table as soon as she was old enough and she will eat anything. Go figure! It was so aggravating when they were growing up (they are both on their own now) though because we were limited as to what we could have at meal times. The important thing is that your daughter is growing so try not to blame that on yourself because some kids are just gonna be like that. I wish I could have been like my mother was when I was little. She would make us eat what was in front of us or we didnt eat at all!!! I just couldnt be that way my kids though. I still have an 11 year old son at home and he is quite picky himself but he is learning to try new things even if he doesnt like them. At least he will attempt them. Good luck to you though.
  • neandermagnon
    neandermagnon Posts: 7,436 Member
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    I'd let a paediatrician decide if she's really overweight or not, kids do have growth spurts and adults are not the width of babies, so they do get wider at some point which means going up in sizes. At 7, she was the same width as her baby sister, well she's not the same age as her, she could even be starting to grow womanly hips, some girls get their first period at age 8. She will pick up on your feelings about it, so be careful not to be embarrassed or feel bad about what size she is, the last thing you want is for her to feel that way.

    You said she's always been slim, and if she hasn't been overeating, then she won't have become obese. Kids don't have to eat perfect healthy food every day to prevent obesity, they just need reasonably healthy food and plenty of opportunity for active play, or kids' sports, or whatever they enjoy.

    And I honestly would not call being a bit plump (even if she is a bit plump) "the worst possible start in life" - there are street kids in Brazil that live in the sewers on the run from the police, begging for scraps of food. So don't beat yourself up. Take her to see the paediatrician, and if she really is obese and the paediatrician really does put her on a diet for fat loss, even then don't beat yourself up but instead know you took action to fix a problem like a good mum does. However, from what you say it really and truly does not sound like she needs to lose weight, it sounds like a normal growth spurt, most likely a pre-adolescent one, but some girls do start puberty very early so it could even be the start of adolescence.
  • evileen99
    evileen99 Posts: 1,564 Member
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    My kids all gained weight right before a growth spurt--they'd get these tummies and fat faces and then shoot up. The youngest (a late bloomer) just had his last growth spurt at 22. He gained 22 pounds in about a month and a half, and then grew 4 inches.

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