Staying motivated when the weight is slow to come off?

lmkaks · March 2013

I started off REALLY strong - was so good with what I ate and was really determined.

I started losing weight but it was slow. I have struggled with losing weight in the past, so I was not super suprised that it was so slow, but was a little disappointed since this was the first time I tried losing weight without using a fad diet or gimmick and I expected to see better results.

If you read my profile, you will see that if I don't see results right away, I quit. This is where I am AGAIN!:grumble:

So, I went to my doctor who sent me to a nutritionist. Since then, I have kind of thrown in the towel. I have gotten so much conflicting infomation from the doctor, nutritonist, personal trainer and people in MFP that it makes my head spin.

I decided to just stay under calories...for now. However, I have been eating like crap. I stay under calories, but with bad food. I haven't had a loss in about three or four weeks, but I haven't gained either.

I am only down seven pounds since January 2nd. I will lose a pound, then stay at zero, then lose another pound, then stay at zero for two weeks, etc. If you look at my diary you will see my crappy food choices. I have lost inches (way more in the first month than the second, but I chalk that up to the initial change I made) and I am at my pre-pregnancy weight (which was goal #1) but far from where I want to be. Again, I just haven't seen enough that makes me want to keep going. I am CONVINCED my body wants to stay fluffy...

HOW CAN I GET MOTIVATED AGAIN?????? I look at the before/after pictures on here and get SO inspired, but I feel so far away from there. I know I have to eat better, so you don't have to tell me to cut the egg drop soup from last night's dinner...I get it. I am giving up again and don't want to, but this all feels so incredibly pointless.

I would love to hear similar stories and your SUCCESSES! Please share with me. I am down, down, down.

fattyfoodie · March 2013

You have to find what motivates YOU. Find that one thing that makes you say "yes! This is IT! "

For me that thing is a strong desire to get off insulin for type II diabetes. I developed gestational diabetes with my second pregnancy and it didn't go away after I had the baby.

You need to discover that one thing that really makes you feel motivated.

As for food choices, the only thing I can say is that eating healthy is hard. I have designated treat days where I splurge and eat things that I normally try to avoid. I plan ahead to make those foods part of my plan, rather than eating them and going over.

Motivation is hard. I go to Weight Watchers now and have found my group to be great motivators. I lost 100 pounds before on my own, but was struggling with motivation this time.

Good luck!!

concordancia · March 2013

Just pick a place to start!

For example, this week, commit to eating...well, it looks like three servings of veggies a day would be a good goal or you. Once you are consistent with that, add a new goal.

Make one for fitness, too if you don't do any exercise, commit to walking or 20 minutes every day.

MrsSki38 · March 2013

We are rowing in the same river.

I've been using MFP for over a year. Wore a BMF for almost a year (took it off a few days ago). Saw a personal trainer a few times a week, ran when the weather was good and cleaned up my diet. Always had a 600+ daily deficit. Started a bootcamp 3x a week in early January on top of seeing my trainer 2x a week and running on occasion. Still had a deficit. Nothing. No weight lost, no inches lost. I'm beyond frustrated.

I'm not going to stop tho. It'll happen when my body is ready to let it go. I feel better. I'm stronger. I starting to be OK with my body. I'm turning 40 in a couple months and will rock it. Regardless.

I've had lots of little wins that are not scale/tape related and that's enough to keep making small goals. I quit drinking coffee a few weeks ago. Before that was cutting out the one can of soda I had every day. Then I worked to stay under my carbs macro every other day. Once I was consistent, I set the goal to stay under carbs every day. Now my goal is to get more veggies into my diet and get back to having my protein shake every morning. If I can't do it every day, I'm going to try to do it every other day until it becomes part of my daily routine. I'm going to start adding in a workout video at home as bootcamp will be over in a couple weeks and work will pick up so getting to the gym is going to be harder.

My trainer keeps telling me that the body needs 8-12 weeks to 'get it' and he's hoping that I'll start to see some changes in the scale/tape. He said he's noticed I'm walking more fluidly and moving more easily. I'm not as winded as I was. It's those NSV that keep me motivated.

lvmygsp · March 2013

We are rowing in the same river.

I've been using MFP for over a year. Wore a BMF for almost a year (took it off a few days ago). Saw a personal trainer a few times a week, ran when the weather was good and cleaned up my diet. Always had a 600+ daily deficit. Started a bootcamp 3x a week in early January on top of seeing my trainer 2x a week and running on occasion. Still had a deficit. Nothing. No weight lost, no inches lost. I'm beyond frustrated.

^^^There must have been "cheating" invloved, to some extent. No way you could have religiously stuck to this exact regimine without wavering and not lost ANY weight or inches. You may need help with your accountability and then you may find the real problem.

lil_pulp · March 2013

Try focusing on health rather than weight or measurements. Make short-term "action goals" that are reasonable to your life, maybe like "Eat 5 servings of veggies today," "Walk at least 10,000 steps today," or "Drink a glass of water before each non-water drink today."

TeedyW · March 2013

Read both of your posts with great interest. I am over 50 and 5'2" so have both of those things working against me. I am also working with a personal trainer. I have boomerang dieted for the last 25 years. I agree that you have to find your own personal motivation. I dance (tango, West Coast Swing and tap right now) and I have been seriously fit when I was younger. I finally decided I just needed to take the long term approach. I have 40 lbs to lose. I did have 50 and it took me a year to take off 10 and settle into the new weight. I find dancing to be very motivating and the fact that I want to be active and travel for many years so I figured it was now or never. I also figure it is important to celebrate every little success (although not with food rewards - I had to change that thinking). It's slow going but, for me, I just need to make all of this a way of life. I have started drinking green smoothies with protein powder once a day. They really seem to help me stay on track and if I use Vega 1 protein powder I can get my minimum serving of vegetables in one drink. My trainer also recommended mixing my morning oatmeat with pasteurized egg white (and fruit) before microwaving. I tried it this morning and it was delicious and full of protein. Added raspberries and blueberries and it was like a baked square. Give it a shot!

Smackemdanno · March 2013

The scale is the biggest threat to make you want to quit than anything else. I have weighed around 280 for the past year. I started lifting weights and even though my weight is the same I probably have less body fat than when I last weighed 245. I am going to have to go clothes shopping soon (I hate shopping) because my clothes have gone from tight to falling off. My belt has the sole responsibility of holding my pants up and I keep moving holes and poking new holes in my belt. It has retired from holding my gut up the last 19 years.

wells0707 · March 2013

Just remember...time will pass regardless if you are losing weight or not. It is better to be 5 pounds down in 5 months than none at all. Slow is better than not at all. Also, you mentioned your crappy food choices. Why don't you try adding some healthy food in the mix and see if you "feel" better.

Do you workout? Maybe if you make mini fitness goals it will help speed up weight loss AND give you goals to look forward too. Good luck!

ryry_ · March 2013

Took a quick glance at the diary. There are several inconsistent incomplete days in your diary. The only way to get consistent results is to consistently be hitting a calorie deficit to lose weight. The easiest way to do this is to diligently log everything you eat and adjust according to your progress. There is no reason you can't lose 1 pound a week min from here on out and be 12 pounds lighter by June.

And don't get discouraged so much if your dietary choices aren't always "healthy". This is the most "unhealthy" i've eaten when trying to lose weight and the most successful I've been on a consistent basis.. Work on getting more healthy foods into your diet but don't let that stop you from losing weight now.

Feel free to PM or FR for more info, or a good group to join is Eat, Train, Progress.

Edited for typos.

schaskes · March 2013

I agree with the posters who advise setting, small, achievable HEALTH goals. Just walking 30 minutes twice a day can make a big difference. Find some motivating music or subscribe to a great podcast. I started watching "The Good Wife" while I workout on the treadmill and wanting to see it has gotten me out of bed more than once to get on that treadmill. Success spirals into more success. Another goal can be drinking more water, eating less sodium, etc. And stick to MFP friends who motivate you - if you need to get rid of some that aren't helping you, go for it. You're still here, so you are still trying. Be proud of yourself for that! Feel free to add me if you need another motivator...

mssierra2u · March 2013

I'm struggling a little bit too, with similar issues. When I see some success I fall back into my "What's the point? I'm so far from what I want to be? What's with the loose skin?" I am actively working on focusing on one thing at a time. I also know that I have to plan ahead for food, because once I am in the drive-thru lane, my decision making goes out the window.

So, perhaps focus on making one better choice per day. For me this week, it's having the "egg mcmuffins" I made at home (baked the eggs in muffin pans and froze the sandwiches). I was used to packing a lunch, but who has time in the morning? So to the drive-thru I would go.

I'm trying to stay in the Serenity Prayer moment. I can't change everything, but one thing I can change.

Bagelsan · March 2013

Don't focus on the weight; that will go when it goes. Focus on your overall health -- like other people have said, make little goals of eating an extra vegetable a day, or drinking more water, or walking 20 minutes, and praise yourself when you meet those goals. Even if the scale doesn't change your body IS getting healthier when you eat right and exercise. Maybe you are converting fat to muscle, or maybe the fat is redistributing to healthier parts of your body (away from your internal organs, for example.) None of this would show in weight changes, but it does mean you're achieving something good!

scottyg70 · March 2013

I don't think I can add to any of the good advice I have seen from prior posters, so instead I will just echo it. Don't give up! It's hard to stay motivated, but remember something: You didn't get out of shape over night, so it's going to take time. Stay away from the empty calories and log and measure EVERYTHING! I can't tell half cup from 3/4 cup from looking at something on my plate, so I measure it out to make sure.

Strive to do some kind of exercise on a daily basis. Whether that is walking the dog (if you have one) or parking further away when you go to the mall or work. Remember, this is a lifestyle change. It takes time to develop those habits. But it can be done!

If you need more motiviation (or anyone else on this thread for that matter) please feel free to add or PM me!

Edit: One thing I forgot to mention: Variety truly is the spice in life! Mix it up! If you keep doing the same thing over and over your body will eventually rebel and you'll lose motivation. So every few weeks do something different, whether that is in your diet or your exercise regime.

rpmtnbkr · March 2013

I had the same problem last year... cut my calories, increased my exercise to levels form a few years ago when it just melted off... nothing at all... really disappointed. Finally went to doctor to discuss. Full battery of blood work including testosterone check. all levels fine except for thyroid. Too low. Upon further research most of the symptoms matched that of low T. They have increased my dosage and finaly appear that it might be stable.

I hit it heavy again the 1st of December and went 6 weeks without any results.... Finally mid to late January I started to see downward progress. I have since noticed by monitoring different nutrients that I can pinpoint the cause of my backsliding weight gain, thereby watching intake of those items.

It takes awhile sometimes and it's possible it coulld also be a medical issue that is causing the lack of progress.

SarahBrown1979 · March 2013

Congrats on taking the step to a new start at a healthier you! I've been a member for over a year now and I started MFP to lose weight for my wedding last May, I can tell you that I lost 36 lbs and 3 dress sizes with the help of MFP, the gym, and my supportive friends on here! I left for a while after the wedding and put on about 10 lbs and working on getting that back off and more by our wedding anniversary (so far I have about 8 lbs to go to get back to wedding day weight). Currently my new goal is the dress in my profile pic, which is for a wedding at the end of April (which is 1 size smaller then wedding dress), so find a goal or something that will motivate you to get to where you want to be, make tiny goals that you can work towards and have fun with it! I've been a heavy girl since 5th grade, it is so hard to lose! One of the things that I've had to tell myself is that it took a long time to put on the weight so its going to take a long time to take it off! I too have given up SEVERAL times but I just get back on and keep going. My biggest issue was when I've lost weight and someone says to me "have you lost weight" or "you look great" and then I think "oh, well I can eat that and I'll be ok", then I go back to where I was before. I don't "CHEAT" any more, I just make sure that if I want to have that "bad food" I'm going to work for it, but believe me when I tell you after eating it that I can tell my body doesn't like it!~ To you and anyone that wants and gives support, Feel free to add me!

cwolfman13 · March 2013

Try focusing on health rather than weight or measurements. Make short-term "action goals" that are reasonable to your life, maybe like "Eat 5 servings of veggies today," "Walk at least 10,000 steps today," or "Drink a glass of water before each non-water drink today."

^^^This, exactly. Focus on your health and overall well being. I got into this whole thing to try to fix some health issues...weight loss is just a nice bi-product of the nutritional choices I'm making. Focusing on better nutrition, health, fitness, and overall well being rather than a number on a scale has been a big part of the success I've had thus far.

When I first started here, someone told me...

"If you focus on results, you'll never see the change; if you focus on the change, you'll ultimately see the results."

fit4lifeUcan2 · March 2013

Do you have a good photo of yourself how you would like to look and a photo of how you look at your heaviest? Put them side by side. Decide which you want to be and then set small goals like eat healthier, cut out chips or whatever your vice is. Try to work on the first 5 or 10 pounds. Once you reach those small goals set a new small goal for yourself. Don't look at the total number you want to lose. That will just discourage you when it doesn't come off as fast as you would like. Reward yourself when you reach your goals. Don't reward yourself with food... your not a dog. Get your hair done or buy new clothes. Go to a movie or buy that book you always wanted to read. Start out with walking for exercise and build up from there. Take one walk a day for 20 minutes or more and each time walk longer. Add a new exercise once a month or more often if you like. Its when we push ourselves too hard too fast and don't see fast results that we get discouraged and give up. Remember that you didn't gain it over night and its not going to come off over night either. 1 pound per week is realistic. I've been at this over a year as well and stalled for 3 straight months. I never gave up. I kept doing what I was doing and just hung in there. It will come off again if you stall. Remember you don't want to quit and undo everything you've already worked so hard for.

wikitbikit · March 2013

I have to remind myself that I'm doing this for my health, for my fitness, and if I lose weight, it's an added bonus. We get so tied up in the aesthetics of it all--what size we are, what we think when we look in the mirror, will we have loose skin or seem more wrinkled, etc--that we forget that that is actually the very least important thing of all. We need to learn to be good to our hearts, to our joints, to our brains... because the way we look in the mirror, or what size we wear, isn't going to matter all that much when we're struck by a disease that we may have been able to avoid if only we'd moved our bodies or eaten more nutritionally sound food.

There are days I still sit on my butt, and I JUST ate a bit of decadent Easter candy, but that's ok--not every step has to be in the direction of perfection, because I'm never going to get there anyway.

JeneticTraining · March 2013

Remind yourself that it is a work in progress. This will give you more time to grow and learn that your endeavors to achieve your dream had many obstacles. Look at it in a more positive perspective.

Noodle797 · March 2013

I decided to just stay under calories...for now. However, I have been eating like crap. I stay under calories, but with bad food. I haven't had a loss in about three or four weeks, but I haven't gained either.

I am only down seven pounds since January 2nd. I will lose a pound, then stay at zero, then lose another pound, then stay at zero for two weeks, etc. If you look at my diary you will see my crappy food choices. I have lost inches (way more in the first month than the second, but I chalk that up to the initial change I made) and I am at my pre-pregnancy weight (which was goal #1) but far from where I want to be. Again, I just haven't seen enough that makes me want to keep going. I am CONVINCED my body wants to stay fluffy...

HOW CAN I GET MOTIVATED AGAIN?????? I look at the before/after pictures on here and get SO inspired, but I feel so far away from there. I know I have to eat better, so you don't have to tell me to cut the egg drop soup from last night's dinner...I get it. I am giving up again and don't want to, but this all feels so incredibly pointless.

You can still have the naughty stuff if you limit yourself to a bite or two. My boyfriend & I eat huge salads and then share a naughty entree. That way we can still enjoy chicken saltimbocca, but we don't go crazy & eat 4,000 calories in one sitting, which is easy to do at Maggiano's!

ctpeace · March 2013

I agree that you have to set small goals, I also think you should work on developing self-control (this has been a hard one for me, and some days are better than others). When you get frustrated, take the opportunity to evaluate your routine, including what time of day you are most likely to eat junk, why you crave poor-quality food etc. Your goals should be tailored to those specific weak areas that you identify. For me, getting home from work was the worst time of day: I only ate what I had packed at work, but then reached for the easiest least-nutritious snacks when I got home. I heard from an accomplished triathlete that you should think of your food as fuel for your body, junk food will keep the motor running, but it will eventually gum up all the parts and prevent you from your goal health. I just joined MFP because I finished a half marathon (yay!), but only lost about 10 of the 70 pounds I'd like to shed (talk about frustrating!). I reevaluated and realized diet is the culprit for me, my meals were basically healthy, but I sort of ignored the tiny snacks (a square of chocolate, 1 potato chip, a handful of popcorn etc.). So my next race is in July and I don't have a time goal, I have a weight goal, which I plan to achieve with the calorie defecit. Mine is fairly steep (I'm set at 1200 calories a day before exercise) because I know my metabolism just isn't naturally fast and that is what I need to do to lose weight. This is a looong road we are on, and it isn't easy, but I encourage you not to give up. Don't let people tell you " it shouldn't be this hard"; it is hard, but you are capable of more than you realize. Every time you get frustrated, tell yourself all the benefits you've gained, even if it's just that you can move more easily, your blood pressure is lower, or that you have more guts than most of the country to even attempt to be healthier. Best of luck to you!

CherryOnionKiss · March 2013

bumping for later. Awesome advice people.

ryry_ · March 2013

With all due respect to the other posters I will go ahead and be the contrarian and say it makes no sense to me to be focusing your attention on items that only have an indirect baring on fat loss. Your goals are your goals. If your goal was to eat more veggies than yes I would focus on eating more veggies. If your goal right now is to burn fat then focus your efforts on that.

1. Create a calorie deficit (if 3 or 4 weeks have passed and you haven’t lost weight or it’s been minimal, then you need to have a heart to heart with yourself and determine if you are honestly hitting your calorie goal on a regular basis. If you are, then you need to increase your exercise, decrease your intake, or a combination of both and reassess your progress.)
2. Get sufficient protein so the weight lost is fat not muscle
3. Start a strength training routine for the same reason as #2.

For your goal of losing weight, everything else is optional and should only be added if it benefits your life and helps you reach your goal (plenty of the suggestions offered are beneficial, but are not what is required). That is my take at least. Good luck.

bonniecarbs · March 2013

I hear you. 27 pounds in two years and I'm struggling like crazy just to lose a few ounces a month. My motivation is to continue going for me because one of these days its going to happen. as long as I am alive and kicking, I'd rather be doing something for myself towards that goal than to just give up, cause if I give up, it will never happen. Better 2 years from now than never. Keep pushing. Good luck

april1445 · March 2013

As much as my MFP friends are awesome and I love the support from this website, it's also a slap in the face when I seem to try as hard as they are and they're down 30 pounds and I'm down 6. I really, truly get you. I'm trying not to compare myself, and stay focused on the positive changes that have happened. I'm much fitter and look more alive than I have in a long time, so that's good. Health counts for something, and I can't lose sight of that, just because the scale continues to betray me. On a strictly practical level, I've started weighing everything to make sure I'm not underestimating my calories, because I think I might be. Good luck. If it was easy, everyone would do it.

lpina2mi · March 2013

I congratulate you on MAINTAINING GOAL #1. This is an excellent strategy while you figure out how to proceed.

You are reading and resourcing and interviewing widely, so YOU ARE DOING SOMETHING MORE...you are trying to figure this out, and have not yet thrown in the towel. The only thing you are chastising yourself for are some "crappy food choices." Perhaps--when your spirit is recharged, that is what you know you can address.

In the meantime, have you applauded yourself for meeting AND keeping goal #1? Also, make a list of all the people of all the people to whom you give valuable resources of time, energy, guidance, and love. It might start something like this: To my lovely children I cook 21 meals and 14 snacks every week; to the girls I coach I give 20 hours of instruction and confidence; to my husband ...

You may feel that you are only "fluffy", but I guarantee there are lots of people of whom when thinking of word to describe you, that would never be one of them.

Thanks for signing in every day and logging. You are a person with stick-to-it-ness, through all sorts of weather. It will not be surprising when you get over this hurdle.

lmkaks · March 2013

Thanks everyone for your GREAT advice! It is also a little comforting to know some of you are in the same boat as me.

I am working out. I lift weights 2-3x per week and do cardio 2x per week. Some weeks have been harder than others becuase of a crazy schedule, but I know the biggest problem is my diet.

As a PP said, it is my food. My problem is, the more discouraged I get = more bad food choices I make. It is the "what the eff, I'm not losing anyway" mentality. I need to get rid of that. I just feel like I yo-yo between feeling that way and "hey, I can do this!" once every two weeks. Definitely counter-active

I love all the health goals advice.

Thanks everyone for the lift I needed! love it!

Goddessmaker1 · March 2013

I haven't lost anything in about a year. I know for me I have a bit no a lot of depression. I lovev 70lbs and then it just stopped in May once I got on with the place I work at now. I yo-yoed and gave up for a brief few weeks and ate what I wanted and would go back and forth. I wasn't perfect when I lost the 70lbs either but my drive was alot different. Now I'm slowly getting back that drive I use to have. I workout like a beast and I am cleaning up my food act. It will happen one day. I may not get to the size I want to before it's too late for me to be found by a nice man and get married but I will be a fit middle aged lady. Don't quit,don't waver. If you know this is what you want then go after it like preggo lady wanting some ice cream. They will waddle off a couch to get it. Make it happen for you no one else. Add me if you would like I don't have friend here because comparison is horrid for the mind.

jlapey · March 2013

We all have those moments. Just remember, you haven't failed until you quit trying. There's lots of great advice here, find something you can stick to. Someone once told me that when I was ready to do this, I would find a way. Until then, I would find excuses. Are you ready?

MrsSki38 · March 2013

^^^There must have been "cheating" invloved, to some extent. No way you could have religiously stuck to this exact regimine without wavering and not lost ANY weight or inches. You may need help with your accountability and then you may find the real problem.

I log everything that goes in my mouth. I am held accountable by more than myself and quite frankly, why would I work as hard as I am only to "cheat"? I had an issue going over carbs pretty consistently until about 4 weeks ago. I rarely go over allotted calories. The real problem is finding that sweet spot with macros and eating enough. I barely clear BMR.

To the OP - I hope you find much success in your journey.

Staying motivated when the weight is slow to come off?

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