Hello, obese. Never thought I'd see you again.

Harris_C
Harris_C Posts: 48 Member
in Health and Weight Loss
I've always been overweight. I've always sought comfort in food. I've always wished myself skinny. I always did everything but actually TRY.

Then, in November 2010, I was given a choice: lose weight or have surgery to repair debilitating gastro issues caused, in part, by years of being morbidly obese (topping the scales at 260+ in 2007). I chose weight loss. I began my weight loss journey at 211 pounds. By August of 2011 I was a proud and happy 145 pounds. I DID IT.

Fast forward to today. I had to have the surgery anyway last April and in January of this year I had back surgery. ALL of 2012 was filled with pain, surgery, suffering, and depression. Again, I looked to my go-to coping mechanism: FOOD. I put the scale away and rationalized myself back to a staggering 185 pounds. 40 pounds gained.

I remember vividly the day I got on the scale and it read 199 - I was no longer a weight that began with a "2." There were no words for that feeling. Since that moment, I continued to lose, I learned how to look people in the eye, learned to accept compliments and not question them, and, most importantly, learned how NOT to live my life overweight.

Life happened and I gave up.

Today, I start again. I can't, I WON'T, keep gaining. I won't keep surpressing my feelings with food. I'll face them and move forward. Will it be easy? Hardly. The exercises I can do are limited at this point. But, I can walk, and that's enough.

I will love this obese body, but I will also tell it goodbye.

Replies

  • NikkisNewStart
    NikkisNewStart Posts: 1,075 Member
    Welcome back on the wagon girl... we know that life happens and wow, you have been through a lot that I had no idea about! It's a marathon, not a sprint and it will come in waves... I'm here to ride this one with you! You will get there again!
  • msteadham
    msteadham Posts: 12 Member
    Welcome back! Hang in there! You did it once, and you will do it again!!
  • Harris_C
    Harris_C Posts: 48 Member
    Thanks Nikki!

    Tummy troubles are no joke and I hope that fast helped you out some :)
  • SydneyRenee2
    SydneyRenee2 Posts: 49 Member
    Wow, what a great story! You've been through a lot! But you have the right attitude & sound like you're on the right track to turn things back around for yourself! It's inspiring to hear you speak that way after what you've been through. We're the only ones who can do this for ourselves, no one will give it to us that's for sure!

    It's so nice to have a support system to keep you accountable and give you that motivation you need on the days you struggle. I hope you have that! You can do this! :)
  • Dtho5159
    Dtho5159 Posts: 1,054 Member
    Aww, welcome back!! Feel free to add me if you'd like.. I lost a bunch and gained a bunch back and am kicking it for good this time :)
  • WildlyCurly
    WildlyCurly Posts: 151 Member
    I am glad you're getting back on the wagon. I believe you can do it because you have done it before. Walking is great so don't worry, but you could also see a physical therapist and they could recommend other safe exercises to burn calories because you might want some variety. After I was injured playing ice hockey I went to one and I got to swim, and go on an exercise bike. Slow pace ofcourse. Also, my mom went to one for knee problems and they helped her out. Plus, they seem to accept most insurance plans so it's worth looking into.
  • 2Bgoddess
    2Bgoddess Posts: 1,096 Member
    Your closing sentence choked me up. Totally encapsulated my feelings. Thank you for sharing.
  • BeachIron
    BeachIron Posts: 6,490 Member
    I like your mental approach to this, OP. Good luck and keep working.
  • Alisontheice
    Alisontheice Posts: 9,611 Member
    Wow what a great attitude. You did it once you will do it again!

    Good luck getting back on the wagon!

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