RANT - I am SOOO mad...

robin52077
robin52077 Posts: 4,383 Member
edited September 21 in Chit-Chat
My 9 year old was visiting an "aunt" (not blood) 4 hours away in Massachusetts this week. She took him to FLORIDA "for the day" without my knowledge. They're back now and everyone's fine but I am SOOOO pissed!

HOW do you take a 9 year old kid that you are not blood related to and take him on his first ever plane trip all the way to Florida without even INFORMING anyone??!?!?!!!?

What if that plane had gone down? What if something happened to them down there? He is NINE, he has no ID. What if they got separated and he was lost?
What if a THOUSAND possible things had happened?
I can't even wrap my head around what she was thinking.

Besides the fact that she didn't ask and I didn't know...besides the stuff I am pissed off about...
I am also a little sad...I have never been on a plane myself. I wanted the first time we went to be TOGETHER, as a family. I missed a huge "first" and didn't even know about it until they were back!

Please tell me I am perfectly justified to want to drive 4 hours just to slap her upside the head, because that's what I feel like doing right now.
So glad my little man is home safe and sound.

And don't worry, it has been made perfectly clear that he will NOT be going to spend a week with her any more. If she wants to visit, she can drive here, I don't trust her anymore.

Replies

  • Panda86
    Panda86 Posts: 873
    Yes, you are justified in being upset. You should tell her that it is unacceptable and that it will not happen again. But you can't go through the list of "what-ifs" at this point. It's done and everyone is fine. Just do what you can to make sure it never happens again. I would be beside myself with anger as well.
  • cynditoney
    cynditoney Posts: 90
    I take care of dogs, and I would not take one down the street without notifying the owners! I would have been furious, had that been my child. You are definitely justified in your feelings!
  • SoldierDad
    SoldierDad Posts: 1,602
    Swing by and get me and we can both smack her. That is crazy for her to do!
  • 2daughtermom
    2daughtermom Posts: 80
    You have every right not to trust her again, no matter how many times she tries to win it back. She must have been temporarily insane when she took your son to FL...WHAT WAS SHE THINKING????!!!! She wasn't obviously. On the other hand she didn't have to tell you at all (unless your son did) and you would have never been the wiser. Let this be a learning experience and never let him visit again.
  • tlapdx72
    tlapdx72 Posts: 311 Member
    I totally agree with you! I would have been sooooo mad!
  • xTattooedDollx
    xTattooedDollx Posts: 426 Member
    Justified to be a little upset yes, but not to be full Boone pissed off. You should me happy that your child got to have this experience, not crying because you've never been on a plane. Just my opinion.
  • dmvbnoslo
    dmvbnoslo Posts: 213 Member
    Yup! you are justified. As one mom to another, that was completely unacceptable for your aunt to do that. I can't imagine what possessed her... I would not be very quick to have contact between her and my child in the future.
  • baggins706
    baggins706 Posts: 310
    I am with this post. What's done is done, he is home safe and sound and you now know what she is capable of.
    You already told her how you feel, she now knows her limits with your child… now just work towards moving on, forgiving but not forgetting!

    Yes, you are justified in being upset. You should tell her that it is unacceptable and that it will not happen again. But you can't go through the list of "what-ifs" at this point. It's done and everyone is fine. Just do what you can to make sure it never happens again. I would be beside myself with anger as well.
  • tlapdx72
    tlapdx72 Posts: 311 Member
    I am surprised that it was so easy for her to take a child on board that wasn't hers. I have never taken my kids on a plane yet, so maybe I am unfamiliar with the procedure,
  • Becka77
    Becka77 Posts: 284 Member
    You are totally justified and have much more restraint than I would have. If that had been my child she would have been visiting the ER already.
  • byHISstrength
    byHISstrength Posts: 984 Member
    WOW, that is nuts! Blood relative or not, that is nuts! She was waaayyyy out of line. I totally understand the how you must feel missing the opportunity to experience that "first" with your son.

    And who the heck flies to Florida for the day? What was this person's point?

    Anyway, it's good that he is back and in your arms.
  • mweeks
    mweeks Posts: 4
    Not only would I be blood steaming mad, but I would have already gone and picked up my child and brought him back home! She had no right to do that!!!
  • LotusF1ower
    LotusF1ower Posts: 1,259 Member
    How dare she!

    I am glad you are not going to allow your kid to visit her anymore, if she has already done that once, what is to stop her doing that again.

    I just cannot believe she didn't ask you first, it is outrageous to be sure!:angry:
  • PJilly
    PJilly Posts: 22,244 Member
    I would be really upset too. When my kids aren't home, I at least like to know where they are and what they're doing. Sometimes they don't always let me know, but for an adult in charge not to let you know? That's just not cool.
  • AmandaB4588
    AmandaB4588 Posts: 655
    That is not just unacceptable. It's illegal.

    If it were me, my child would never visit her again.
  • ShastaAngel
    ShastaAngel Posts: 61
    UNREAL! I would be furious!!! She had no right to take your child any further than the corner store! By law NO ONE take can your child across state lines without your permission or knowledge! I am virtually speechless... all I can say is you are right to be angry!
  • sharonsylvester
    sharonsylvester Posts: 52 Member
    I have thought this through, yes it is upsetting that the aunt did not inform you about her plans of taking your child on the plane; but you trust her to want your son to spend time with her blood relative or not you trusted her to take care of your son. She did take care of your son, she made sure that no harm came to him and she brought him back to you safely. The only thing that she did wrong was not informing you of her plans. I take it that you live in the States so no passport is needed to travel between States, she never took you child outside of the country. She just wanted to make sure that your son had a good time. She probably considered all other mode of transportation and decided that the plane is faster, and since she is not kidnapping your son or putting him in harms way she thought nothing of it.

    Sometimes we need to view things from another point of view. You just need to calm down, because now the aunt knows that mode of transportation she chose was not acceptable for you.
  • sabrinafaith
    sabrinafaith Posts: 607 Member
    I completely understand. I would have completely lost my temper at anyone who even attempted to do that with my kid. Completely inappropriate and immature. And why did she do it anyway? Like, was there something important going on in Fla or was it just a day trip?
  • AmandaB4588
    AmandaB4588 Posts: 655
    I have thought this through, yes it is upsetting that the aunt did not inform you about her plans of taking your child on the plane; but you trust her to want your son to spend time with her blood relative or not you trusted her to take care of your son. She did take care of your son, she made sure that no harm came to him and she brought him back to you safely. The only thing that she did wrong was not informing you of her plans. I take it that you live in the States so no passport is needed to travel between States, she never took you child outside of the country. She just wanted to make sure that your son had a good time. She probably considered all other mode of transportation and decided that the plane is faster, and since she is not kidnapping your son or putting him in harms way she thought nothing of it.

    Sometimes we need to view things from another point of view. You just need to calm down, because now the aunt knows that mode of transportation she chose was not acceptable for you.


    Ehhh... I don't know. I agree that seeing all points of view is important but this literally IS kidnapping. Charges could have been filed and the aunt would have been convicted.

    I don't know what kind of person would decide to do such a thing but she seems a bit off to me.
  • Keltinator
    Keltinator Posts: 265
    wow. how did she even manage to get him on plane without being a blood relative? maybe things are different in america from canada but still... wow!

    you're totally right for bering pissed off in my opinion, she was way outta line to do that. Well it's not really that she did it that bugs me but that she did it without you knowing! that's SO wrong.
  • sharonsylvester
    sharonsylvester Posts: 52 Member
    Ehhh... I don't know. I agree that seeing all points of view is important but this literally IS kidnapping. Charges could have been filed and the aunt would have been convicted.

    I don't know what kind of person would decide to do such a thing but she seems a bit off to me.
    [/quote]

    How could have charges be filed, she did not take the child out of the country, and the mother did give the child over to her to spend the day.
  • skatjon
    skatjon Posts: 29
    WTH!!! First who goes to Florida "for the day"??? and I ask to take children to movies in the same town just to make sure the movie we are going to see is ok with the parents. WOW
  • robin52077
    robin52077 Posts: 4,383 Member
    Thank you to everyone that agrees she was wrong.
    Even though she is not blood related to us, she loves him as though he is family, and has been close to him since before he could walk. He has spent a week with her every summer and he'll go 2 or 3 days without checking in. I know he is safe with her, and I usually find out that they went to various beaches or an amusement park, always something big and exciting. With the money she has, you never KNOW what they are going to do.
    But this time she went too far...
    I probably would have said yes. I do trust her with him. My big point is that I should have been ASKED. It's common courtesy. And I'm guessing the couple of people who said that it wasn't a big deal probably don't have kids....

    He had a great time. They actually left Wednesday afternoon and got back Saturday night, now that he is home and I could get the whole story out of him. And it wasn't for Disney or anything, it was all just because a friend of hers had a time share that was available and she jumped on it. So they just hung out at a 4 star resort and went in the pool and stuff.
  • TCASMEY
    TCASMEY Posts: 1,405 Member
    Ehhh... I don't know. I agree that seeing all points of view is important but this literally IS kidnapping. Charges could have been filed and the aunt would have been convicted.

    I don't know what kind of person would decide to do such a thing but she seems a bit off to me.

    How could have charges be filed, she did not take the child out of the country, and the mother did give the child over to her to spend the day.
    [/quote]

    Not a legal expert here but I do believe taking a child over state lines without permission is considered kidnapping.

    Now to those who are asking how you get a child on a plane who is not a blood relative? How do they know the child you are traveling with is not your own child? Children have no ID. I have never had to prove the children with me on a plane are my own. I am the only one who has to produce ID. I do not need their birth certificates...or maybe I do now in the age of post 9-11. I have not flown with the kids in many years.
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