How did you learn to accept compliments?

thinking_thinly
thinking_thinly Posts: 143 Member
in Success Stories
I have lost a little over 60lbs, and as such, my body is quite smaller. I have gotten a range of reactions, all positive, but some have left me flabbergasted... Today I was at a baby shower, and they were passing out some of the more interesting gifts around in a circle so everyone could see upclose... well I was at the end of the circle, so my job was to return the gift to the table.... when I got back my friend was telling me she was checking out my butt lol. Not in a... well, she was just saying how good I looked. I turned beet red, I had no clue what to say! I also got "teacher, why is your tummy flatter" just recently! That one was cute... and I had to chuckle because my stomach is far from flat, but even little eyes are noticing! Everyone keeps commenting on my weight loss, and I feel proud, but when anyone mentions it, I get super awkward and have no idea what to say, and I am actually pretty embarrassed. Anyone else experience that?
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Replies

  • jayche
    jayche Posts: 1,128 Member
    Congrats on your weight loss!
    I just say thanks, maybe compliment them back and move along. If you want to be modest then be modest but don't completely shut down their compliment like a lot of people do.
  • tuckerrj
    tuckerrj Posts: 1,453 Member
    Just "thanks", "thank you" or "thanks for noticing" then let it go. You don't need a long dissertation (sic?).
  • ajhugz
    ajhugz Posts: 452 Member
    Yes! Fake it until you make it lol! I smile and say thank you or find a cute/funny way to agree. I haven't loss that much yet but people have already started with the compliments. In my mind I'm like its only 9 lbs, but everyone is so happy for me.
  • quirkytizzy
    quirkytizzy Posts: 4,052 Member
    Smile, say thank you. That's all you need to do if you aren't feeling like making it into a production.
  • ktsmom430
    ktsmom430 Posts: 1,100 Member
    I still have difficulty accepting compliments. My brain has not kept up with the weight loss. I still see myself as a fat lady. I went from a size 24W (tight) to size 10 now. I have bought four pairs of size 10 jeans and I keep expecting the sales person to ask why this fat lady is buying size 10 jeans.
    It is embarrassing still. Maybe it takes a while for our brains to catch up with our accomplishments.
    Congratulations to you, it is kind of a nice situation to be in though, isn't it?
  • taso42
    taso42 Posts: 8,980 Member
    Yep, pretty much just get into the habit of saying, "aw thank you!". I understand. It's hard to take a compliment.
  • thinking_thinly
    thinking_thinly Posts: 143 Member
    Okay, nod head, smile, say thank you... check! I think I can do that lol
  • Crankstr
    Crankstr Posts: 3,958 Member
    Okay, nod head, smile, say thank you... check! I think I can do that lol

    yep

    and try not to add any BUT....
  • sslichenmyer
    sslichenmyer Posts: 19 Member
    the ones that sort of bother me are the ones that say you use to be soo big your alot smaller now or look how much smaller you are
  • robot_potato
    robot_potato Posts: 1,535 Member
    I've finally been able to say thank you, instead of turning beet red, looking at the ground and not responding. It took a long time for me to get there. It started by forcing myself to because it was the polite thing to do, and it was really awkward at first. I'd be blushing and i'm sure i looked like an idiot struggling so hard to force the words out. Sometimes I would have to find the person later and thank them, let them know it made me feel good and I'm just not used to being complimented. After a while it just became more comfortable, though I still am a bit awkward. I'm working on it.
  • MB_Positif
    MB_Positif Posts: 8,897 Member
    Yeah, I definitely remember having a hard time with it at first, I am pretty sure I probably said "Thank you" and then looked at the floor.
  • 1ConcreteGirl
    1ConcreteGirl Posts: 3,677 Member
    Only recently have I learned to not deflect with humor. The best response is always a sincere, "thank you, that's really nice of you to say."

    I think it's important to be able to own your strengths with pride. It does wonders for the self-esteem.
  • NobodyInParticular
    NobodyInParticular Posts: 352 Member
    I'm terrible at it. I just say thank you. They don't come often but when they do... I'm taken off guard
  • DonnaLeeCattes
    DonnaLeeCattes Posts: 492 Member
    I just smile big and say thank you!
    I went from a tight 16 to a 3, it does still feel unreal sometimes.
  • XXXMinnieXXX
    XXXMinnieXXX Posts: 3,459 Member
    I still have difficulty accepting compliments. My brain has not kept up with the weight loss. I still see myself as a fat lady. I went from a size 24W (tight) to size 10 now. I have bought four pairs of size 10 jeans and I keep expecting the sales person to ask why this fat lady is buying size 10 jeans.
    It is embarrassing still. Maybe it takes a while for our brains to catch up with our accomplishments.
    Congratulations to you, it is kind of a nice situation to be in though, isn't it?

    I feel like the sales people are wondering why I'm in their shop and not a plus size store! I still haven't learnt how to accept them, but I am getting slightly better! It's tough for sure! Suppose it will just take time! X
  • trudijoy
    trudijoy Posts: 1,685 Member
    I just schooled myself to answer 'thankyou' regardless of whether I agreed. I'd actively have to force it, but eventually it became habit
  • libertygirlfla
    libertygirlfla Posts: 184 Member
    It definitely takes some practice...I agree; fake it 'til you make it! I usually just say, "Thanks for noticing, I've been working really hard".

    Congrats on your success!
  • seanezekiel
    seanezekiel Posts: 228 Member
    I have a hard time stopping myself from thinking the person is just being nice. its so hard to accept it in yourself.
  • jbutterflye
    jbutterflye Posts: 1,914 Member
    It's good to be gracious. A simple "thank you", even in the face of some over the top comments. Time to delete that negative programming!
  • jbutterflye
    jbutterflye Posts: 1,914 Member
    Only recently have I learned to not deflect with humor. The best response is always a sincere, "thank you, that's really nice of you to say."

    I think it's important to be able to own your strengths with pride. It does wonders for the self-esteem.

    I agree.
  • smilingirisheyes
    smilingirisheyes Posts: 149 Member
    It is awkward for me too. I just go with "Thanks."
  • Cyclink
    Cyclink Posts: 517 Member
    To be honest, I still have not learned to accept compliments.
  • SJackson50
    SJackson50 Posts: 282 Member
    It definitely takes some practice...I agree; fake it 'til you make it! I usually just say, "Thanks for noticing, I've been working really hard".

    Congrats on your success!

    ^^This is what I've been saying...congrats to everyone!!!
  • triciab79
    triciab79 Posts: 1,713 Member
    It takes time. I still have not adjusted. The nicest thing anyone said before was nice hair so going from that to having strangers call me pretty was a bit jarring at first. I still feel like I need to compliment back. Its seems rude to not so I always pick out something. I'm pretty good at girls but guys I still need to work on how to respond to men.
  • CakeFit21
    CakeFit21 Posts: 2,521 Member
    "Thanks. I feel great."
  • iqjones
    iqjones Posts: 8
    the ones that sort of bother me are the ones that say you use to be soo big your alot smaller now or look how much smaller you are
    How about "you have lost a ton!" Or "you look like half of what you used to be!"
    What do you say to those?
  • PetulantOne
    PetulantOne Posts: 2,131 Member
    Okay, nod head, smile, say thank you... check! I think I can do that lol

    yep

    and try not to add any BUT....

    The but is always the hard part for me. Currently working on that :)
  • princessdracos
    princessdracos Posts: 125 Member
    For me, it took the right person complimenting me. The first few comments felt so sincere that I was able to respond naturally. I learned that I prefer a demure "thank you" while smiling with my eyes. That may not make any sense. LOL
  • splitdog79
    splitdog79 Posts: 106 Member
    It's sort of awkward, I'll admit. I don't really feel any different, despite being over 150 lbs lighter. In my head I'll always be the fattest guy in any building I'll be in.

    I just go with the "Why, thank you!" routine. Then they ask what diet your on or if you've had surgery and sometimes it can get to a weird place with all the prying because you don't want to be "that guy" but yeah, obviously you've been working hard on it.
  • Gloric
    Gloric Posts: 2
    I'm already awkward as hell socially, I used to be incredibly fit and under the 120kg of fat I had accumulated was a decent layer of muscle, when al lI did was diet for 6-8 months and suddenly had bulging muscles, comments came left and right.

    "oh damn, you've lost weight"
    "yeah"

    lol, as I said, socially awkward =P

    EDIT: I also self deprecated for years while I was massive, most of them realised I wasn't sensitive about it so they were mostly genuine comments if they said anything at all. As they knew I didn't respond to flattery or negativity at all and just laughed.

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