I get discrouraged when I look at my ideal weight....

rozsbluejay
rozsbluejay Posts: 303 Member
in Motivation and Support
My starting weight was 323.5.

My weight now is around 312.

I had problems my first six months, but I got a trainer and I'm supposed to be losing 5 pounds a week. I'm doing better than before.

I've lost about 10 pounds...which is good don't get me wrong...I just get discouraged when I look at what I'm supposed to weight.


I'm 5'5" I'm supposed to weigh "ideally" 136...the highest I should weigh is 156.

Lets take 156. From my weight now is 312. I literally have to lose half my weight. I have to lose 156 pounds to be at an ideal weight of 156 pounds.

I'm sure it can be done. I just get discouraged knowing that I have to lose half my weight.

Help?
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Replies

  • jlr2001
    jlr2001 Posts: 25 Member
    I hear what you are saying this is what I did it worked fine for me. I made tons of small goals that together mad up the big goal. I simply worked to the small goal because that is more manageable and helps build confidence that if I can do this then i can do the other. I believe you can do it and you are amazing and making good decisions and getting better.
  • Celeigh12
    Celeigh12 Posts: 763 Member
    Focus on each day by itself instead of looking ahead to your end goal. I just look at one day at a time - eat well today, stay within my calories today, get some activity in today. The scale takes care of itself. You'd be surprised how quickly your life can change!
  • binkgoebel
    binkgoebel Posts: 1 Member
    Don't look at your ideal weight. Just focus on being healthier each day....and maybe think about getting in the 200s and how good that will feel....That isn't so far away.
    Good for you for taking steps to a healthier life!!!
  • famousmonstr76
    famousmonstr76 Posts: 3
    First thing you have to think about is everyone is different. Things you read about dieting on the internet or the stories of others are great for motivation, but keep in mind you need to focus on what works for you. If you get discouraged when thinking of your "ideal" weight, then make your goal to lose 20. When you hit that goal, make your next goal 20 more etc etc. Smaller steps are what helped me when I was younger and I wanted to lose all the weight I had put on throughout my younger years. Food was always my comfort. Also, lose it at your own pace. If your "suppose" to lose 5 pounds a week with a trainer, do not get discouraged if it doesn't happen. My goal is 2 a week. If I only lose .5 pound for that week I am a happy camper. I went down, not up. I remind myself the next week will be better. I am not in any rush. Just wait, before you know it, you will be closer to your goal than you know.
  • parinati
    parinati Posts: 5
    hello.....i am in the same situation you are..and it is discouraging when you look at where you are..and where you want to be...
    and know its going to be a long journey. its good knowing there are ppl who did it....and ppl who are doing it right now...so we dont feel so alone as we go along...no matter how long it takes us.

    small goals are good goals:) take care:)
  • cmriverside
    cmriverside Posts: 34,454 Member
    If I were you, I'd listen to Celeigh12.....she DID lose 155 pounds.

    Maybe send her a friend request, and some other big losers, too. They will be your cheerleaders.


    I was going to say One Day At A Time. Or even one meal at a time. Be in the moment and rejoice at all your successes.
  • da_bears10089
    da_bears10089 Posts: 1,791 Member
    on the fat 2 fit site, i figured out my bf % and with what my % is now, and what i would LIKE it to be, it said that my ideal weight is 157 lbs. You need to try to ignore the BMI numbers and how much the scale thinks you should weigh. I've basically come to terms that at 5'5", i don't think i will ever weigh 135 lbs like i originally planned, because i plan on having more muscle, and be in really good shape instead of just being thin.
  • verptwerp
    verptwerp Posts: 3,629 Member
    Stop thinking about it ...... just make healthy choices at each meal, each day ..... get some exercise & have fun ........

    Best of luck to you :drinker:
  • akdollie
    akdollie Posts: 69 Member
    I would just take it a mini goal at a time. I'm 5'5" also. I got down to 135 in high school (so long ago..) at the time I felt good but look back and my bones were sticking out. Not a good look if you ask me. I have since learned I do actually have a large frame and tend to hold a lot of muscle especially in my legs. So I set a "mini goal" for myself of 180 to see how I feel when I get there. I am less concerned about the number on the scale and more about how I feel in my skin. Just keep going and cross that bridge when you get to it! A lot of people on here seem to have gotten down to their "range" so it must be doable.
  • LayerzOff
    LayerzOff Posts: 25
    I defo would set smaller goals and also you are goin to feel great as each 7 lbs comes off and before you know it you will be there.. It does not mean that you will not feel good till you get to goal as trust me you will hun. Well done on your loss so far and stay focused.. You are doin great ;)
  • supplemama
    supplemama Posts: 1,956 Member
    It does seem discouraging at first, but then you start to lose weight and it just snowballs every month. Of course there are times of little to no weight loss that will happen but overall if you do what you're supposed to do the weight just keeps going down. Take it one day at a time...2-3 years are going to pass anyway. In 2-3 years you could be at your goal weight or you could still weigh over 300 pounds. The choice is yours.
  • zillah73
    zillah73 Posts: 505 Member
    I definitely concur with those who said focus on the day in front of you as well as set short term goals. A long term goal can be terribly daunting to the point of being discouraging. Every pound is progress and there are so many wonderful milestones between now and goal weight for you to focus on and rejoice in. I know it may sound a little new-agey and crazy, but try to stay present and pay attention to the process.
  • Chelle175
    Chelle175 Posts: 31 Member
    I completely understand. I once had a doctor tell me that I should weigh 150lbs. This was when I was over 240 lbs. I thought, NOT POSSIBLE. I did a little research and it turns out the upper limit of where I should be is 175 lbs. Again I thought, NOT POSSIBLE. I've been overweight my entire life.

    I'm at 178 lbs. Almost there. Between a loving husband, friendly competition with my sister, myfitnesspal.com, and some consistently good choices, I WILL MAKE IT!!

    Point is, it can be done. Just take it 1 day at a time. It has taken me a year to get to where I am now. Set intermediate goals. Such as 320 lbs. Then below 300 lbs...then below 275 lbs. Enjoy those goals. Celebrate them as if you just got down to your ideal weight. They are an accomplishment. Every pound counts.

    You can do it!!!
  • rosebarnalice
    rosebarnalice Posts: 3,488 Member
    Set intermediate goals!

    Losing even 10% of your weight improves your health! Set a goal of 10%. . . then when you meet it, go for the next 10%. . . and then then next 10%. . . . !

    http://www.webmd.com/diet/features/lose-weight-gain-tons-of-benefits
    http://www.weightwatchers.com/util/art/index_art.aspx?tabnum=1&art_id=41231&sc=3002
  • iorahkwano
    iorahkwano Posts: 709 Member
    It'll go by faster than you know it... I hear larger people lose weight faster because it's easier to shock the body with a calorie deficit, and the bigger you are, the more calories you burn working out. A 200lbs lady burns more calories doing 20 jumping jacks than a 130lbs lady. There's just more muscle & energy required to move onself.

    156lbs may seem far away, but try to make little checkpoints for yourself! So you can focus on mini-goals instead of the final goal. Maybe you could make a checklist of mini goals:

    1) Get under 300lbs
    2) 275lbs
    3) 250lbs
    4) 225lbs
    5) 200lbs
    etc...

    It will be exciting for you to see a 2_ _ instead of a 3_ _ number on the scale! If you don't want weight goals, you can go by shirt/pants size... Or little things you'd like to do (i.e. Be able to jog for one minute, ride a bike for 5mins, walk for 15mins, etc).
  • loosesealbluth
    loosesealbluth Posts: 46 Member
    Don't be discouraged! I actually started off at 321, so basically the same weight as you. I remember the first week or two were the hardest because I had no idea how quickly I would lose weight and was under the impression that I was going to have to work my a** off, à la biggest loser. I also thought it would take ages upon ages to see any change. 7 months later and I'm halfway to my goal weight of 160! While challenging, it's not as hard as the media portrays it. I have the occasional setback, and while I sometimes have a hard time seeing the difference, I know it's there.

    Of course, I'm waiting for my progress to slow down and I do sometimes get discouraged when I realize I still have 80 pounds to go. I think it's hugely important that you create mini goals for yourself, like others have mentioned. Mine have been getting out of the 300s, and then every 25 or so pounds of loss (so 25, 50, 75, etc...). I usually reward myself with a new pair of jeans a size down, or I'll dye my hair or something. Just remember that every pound counts and is worth being proud about!

    It's also cool to create fitness goals to go along with your weight loss goals, which took me several months to realize. Going 40 minutes instead of 30, increasing intensity, or starting a program like C25K (that's what I'm working on right now!). It's encouraging to see that your endurance is improving and you can make it a little bit further/longer.

    Anyway, best of luck. The fact that you've already lost 10 pounds is fantastic! You've proved that you can do it. Also, feel free to add me if you want :)
  • binglebandit
    binglebandit Posts: 531 Member
    That's how I felt last summer when I started, and now that I've lost almost 70lbs, I'm glad it's taken as long as it has to get even this far. It can be hard to get used to your new reflection in the mirror. Half the time I don't even feel like I'm "me". So enjoy the journey as you go, you'll get there much sooner than you even realize. I used to think I wanted to lose it all overnight, but looking back I'm glad it took so long, I wouldn't even have minded if it went slower.

    I set myself goals of 10%. So I started at 247, so my first goal was losing 24lbs. It ended up being a good goal because that's the point where my pants started to look horrible even when belted. I'd suggest doing something like that. By the time I'm done I'll have lost 1/3 of my weight. It's hard to imagine, but it'll happen one day at a time.
  • Keurigirl
    Keurigirl Posts: 5 Member
    It is overwhelming to look at it like that. So don't.

    1. You will never see that number if you don't start.
    2. Every journey begins with one step. And then another. We don't just fly up all the stairs at once. :)
    3. Whenever I get impatient (which is often!) I think about this: The time is going to continue to pass no matter what I do. So I can either continue working out, eating right, or I can continue making excuses, being lazy, and making bad choices. At the end of next month, I can either be closer or further away from my goal. And I am choosing to be closer to my goal.
  • michellekicks
    michellekicks Posts: 3,624 Member
    If I were you, I'd listen to Celeigh12.....she DID lose 155 pounds.

    ^ Yep. :drinker: Wow.

    You can do this. One day. Each day. Time will pass... you will get where you're going if you just aim in the right direction.
  • upgetupgetup
    upgetupgetup Posts: 749 Member
    Set intermediate goals!

    Losing even 10% of your weight improves your health! Set a goal of 10%. . . then when you meet it, go for the next 10%. . . and then then next 10%. . . . !

    http://www.webmd.com/diet/features/lose-weight-gain-tons-of-benefits
    http://www.weightwatchers.com/util/art/index_art.aspx?tabnum=1&art_id=41231&sc=3002

    Totally this! Much less daunting.
  • stevenleagle
    stevenleagle Posts: 293 Member
    Roz. Some good advice in the other posts. But also think of it this way: you have made the most important step already. The realisation. The aha moment. You have decided to change. That's the best thing you could have done for yourself. Think of all the people who simply accept their situation and give up. Not you. You have begun the good fight. Don't give up. As others have said - set yourself small meaningful goals. Don't give up. Once you have reached your goals, keep conquering. It may take you 6 months, it may take you a year, maybe a few years. But the great thing with mfp is that you have the tools to keep on track. Personally I have found the journey to losing weight a great one. So much so that I wonder what I am going to look forward to once I am at target weight. Make this about THE JOURNEY. Enjoy the journey. Re-discover things about yourself as you go along (just as you would exploring a new country). Believe me if the GOAL seems daunting, learning to take pleasure in the JOURNEY will make it a lot easier. Good luck. I think you will be fine. Just stick with it.
  • MzBeckie
    MzBeckie Posts: 207 Member
    I felt the same way whenever I thought of how my goals was to be at least 150 lbs. I would see how much weight i would have to lose and that number seemed like Alot to me and I would feel like giving up. But I have broken my major goal down into minor goals of losing 10lbs at a time. Think of losing 10 lbs was easier for me than seeing what I wanted my weight goal to be.
    Just keep at it, take it a day at time and you will get there. :) Whenever I see changes (like clothing sizes), i get more motivated.
  • QuietRain
    QuietRain Posts: 157
    Stop looking at how far you have to go, look at how far you've come.
    You'll get there eventually.
  • taunto
    taunto Posts: 6,420 Member
    What helped me was to set the MFP goals to like 20 lbs or so only at a time. I hated looking at that huge number I still have to lose. Hope this helps you :)
  • jennifer_417
    jennifer_417 Posts: 12,344 Member
    I get discouraged when I think about my end goal, too. So, I choose not to think about it much. Celebrate each victory as it comes. I celebrate every 5 lbs with a pair of earrings, and every 10 lbs with a slightly larger reward.

    Break it up into small goals, even if your goal is to get through the day or the next meal. Don't think about the long term. Think about today, otherwise you could easily get overwhelmed and discouraged.
  • fredf2112
    fredf2112 Posts: 110 Member
    Change your goal (for now). Make it say, 250. Change it so your ticker shows 250 is your goal. Heck, that only a little over 50 pounds and you've already lost 10. You're practically there. Once you get there (and you will before you know it) set a new goal of say 225. Shoot, only 25 pounds? No sweat. Make these your goals, small increments to focus on.
  • kmw899
    kmw899 Posts: 41
    If I think about how much I have/want to lose, I definitely get overwhelmed and discouraged. Instead I'm focusing on making smaller weight loss and health/fitness goals for myself and then making new ones once I reach them.
  • triciab79
    triciab79 Posts: 1,713 Member
    Have faith! It can happen faster and easier than you think. When you combine the right diet style for you with the right determination it can and will happen.
  • chellebublz
    chellebublz Posts: 568 Member
    I started at 249. My first goal was to be under what I was when my son was BORN. That's 228. I"m 227 now, so goal met! And it feels amazing and sooo incredibly motivating. My next goal is 214, as that's what I weighed when I got pregnant with my son. My first BIG goal is to make 199 by July 14th when my mom visits from out of state. Anyways, this is just an example of how I do it and it makes it so much less overwhelming than saying "OH I weight 227 and the ideal weight for my height is 147 max so I need to lose 80 more pounds?!" and then go cry in my water. I would NEVER lose this weight if I looked at it that way. But a few pounds at a time, one day a time, week at a time? Totally doable, and I WILL and you can too :D
  • AmberleyAngel
    AmberleyAngel Posts: 160 Member
    I know exactly how you feel. For a long time I had no idea where to start or how to do it. I am aiming to lose 56% of my body weight, and that won't even bring me to "healthy" range. It's just something you have to do and count every day as a successful step on a journey. As others have said, having multiple small goals is crucial to achieving a lifelong change. A house is built on nail or one brick at a time, and so weight loss happens with every ounce lost. Every bit that leaves is a more healthier you.

    I've so far lost 29.5% of my weight, so I am over half way ( I joined MFP partway through my loss so my ticker only shows progress since I joined). I have lots of goals - things to mark my progress. Here are some that might give you ideas - to fit my engagement ring again, have to throw out my favourite trousers because they're too big, etc. And just this past weekend I fitted back into a pair of jeans I last wore in 1998. Find small objectives which mean something personal to you and that don't revolve around the scales (scale goals are good too but shouldn't be the only way to measure progress).

    Congratulations on your loss to date. Stay strong, keep at it, and enjoy the journey.

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