Discouraged: Grieving/Injured

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svanhoecke
svanhoecke Posts: 266
in Motivation and Support
Hello friends!

I don't usually post topics like this...but I am feeling really low. I have a gained a few pounds in the past couple of weeks because I have just fallen completely off of the program.

A little over a week ago, a friend of mine was shot and killed in a home invasion. I am still processing everything and working through it. Right now I am struggling with not being able to sleep at night, eating everything in my path, and having no motivation to work out. :frown:

On top of that, I have had whiplash that won't go away since October. My chiropractor has given up. He basically said "There is nothing else I can do. You just have to wait." So I can't lift with my upper body without further hurting myself. Frustrating.

Last year I ate vegan almost all year and felt great. Now I have been eating vegetarian but have been terrible about it.

Basically I need you guys to remind me how good it feels to be fit, eat right, and work out. I am losing confidence and dont' feel good about how I look in my clothes right now. And I just feel gross from the junk I have been eating.


Help remind me what it's all about?

Replies

  • Smokey19
    Smokey19 Posts: 796 Member
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    I don't know what it is like to lose a friend that way, but I have lost a lot of family members, including my first husband. I didn't sleep or eat and lost 30 lbs. in 3 wks. I know that your heart is breaking right now and time will help, but you will never forget. It will get better, I promise. Take a few moments and writing that friend a letter. Feel free to write anything and everything that pops in your head...no one else will ever see it. It helps to get those thoughts out. My heart goes out to you...hugs.
  • melw2910
    melw2910 Posts: 73 Member
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    Hi, I recently lost a friend to a sudden death and its heartbreaking. You just need to think that your friend would not want to see you suffering like this, live life to the full as it is so short and we never know whats around the corner.
    As for your injury, try to focus on what you can do and the rest will come with time.
    We are here to support each other so feel free to add me if you want
    xx
  • athenasurrenders
    athenasurrenders Posts: 278 Member
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    I am so very sorry for your loss.

    Please feel free to take or ignore my suggestions as I haven't been through anything similar.

    I would try to think of it this way: there's no way to make the pain that you are feeling go away, but you can at least make your body feel a little better with good nutrition and exercise. It's a tiny way to improve your situation. You're suffering, you deserve to be well taken care of, and part of that is looking after your body.

    Would it help you to train for something in honour of your friend's memory? Run a race or climb a mountain? That might let you feel you are working through your grief at the same time.

    It is perfectly normal to feel like this after such an event. Don't be hard on yourself. Of course you have lost some motivation. Do you have people to lean on? While grief can last a long time the shock will begin to wear off and you might find you naturally start feeling more motivated.
  • fitniknik
    fitniknik Posts: 713 Member
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    Hey, Let the pressure off yourself a little!! You seem to be going through a lot! give yourself a break. Pick a starting day maybe a month out with a easy program like Leslie Sanone (sp) the walking fit program should be pretty easy on your back, untill then try to watch your food and maybe take a walk or 2 for 20 minutes each day and DO YOUR STRETCHES!! thats Very important. I Had whiplash twice, its even harder to get over the 2nd time. Trust me!! It takes a long time to heal and you will continute to have flare ups, when that happens take a couple days to realx. You gotta watch that eating though, try to just keep healthy whole foods around, get rid of everything bad in the house (Im talking even the chocolate chips!) Stock the fride with fruits and veggies and you should be ok!
  • Go_Silly
    Go_Silly Posts: 8 Member
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    I can relate to what your going thru....lost my husband to a head on collision and this past year has been a roller coaster. You have to be able to work thru your grief and allow yourself to heal....basically, find yourself again. I've been slowly getting back on track as well (after gaining 1/2 my weight back) by walking each day. Things slowly start to fall back into place (RE: eating habits, emotions, self confidence, etc.) but it all takes time. You cannot put a time limit on grief. You have to heal from the inside out.....rather than the outside in. Don't be affraid to ask support of family & friends....their our biggst cheerleaders! You can do it....just take baby steps and you will ease back into it. :smile:
  • thesiberianwind
    thesiberianwind Posts: 5
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    No matter what happens in life, you have to, and CAN rebuild yourself. Just like Eleanor Roosevelt (I hope I've got the right person) said, "No one can make you feel inferior without your consent."

    Unexpected things happen. It really sucks. It can suck the life out of you for good or just for a little while. But you have the power to stop the drain. You have the power to rise above this adversity. You CAN do it.

    You can't change what happens around you, but you can and should change your outlook about it. So you ate some extra stuff to help grieve. It's like going to a holiday party on an empty stomach. It happens. Each day is a new opportunity to rebuild.

    We're here to encourage you. You are here to encourage yourself to make it happen. When you're ready, you'll be back where you want to be and back on the path to your weight/fitness goals!

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