Feeling Down... What am I Doing Wrong?

...and HUGE. I literally broke down in tears yesterday. I know that you can't "spot lose" but you can certainly spot gain. I have been working diligently for the past six weeks to reduce my saddlebags and lift my butt about one million inches and nothing is happening.

My musclehead friends suggested that I try to build muscle, so I went on a bulk... eating about 500 calories about maintenance and lifting weights HEAVILY (probably could go heavier) three times a week. The result... a beautiful upper body and the most disgusting thighs I have ever seen! Seriously... my butt seems to have dropped even lower and it just... moves. I have these two chunks sitting on the sides of my body and I just want to give up.

I am currently doing full body workouts (deadlifts, squats, barbell rows, wood choppers, back extensions, dips, chin ups, abs, lunges) and HIIT. Why am I not changing? Should I get on fat burners? Cut the cardio? Am I not lifting enough? Am I eating too much?

Seriously, this is really starting to depress me. PLEASE HELP!!!

Replies

  • PRMinx
    PRMinx Posts: 4,585 Member
    I'm not sure six weeks is enough time to really change everything. Keep at it.

    I'll leave the diet to other people on the board who know better, but I wouldn't cut the cardio or the lifting. I slim down the most when I'm doing a lot of cardio.
  • jalloggio
    jalloggio Posts: 141
    When it comes to fitness 6 weeks is a very short period of time. However your muscle head friend who says you should bulk (when you are trying to lose weight) should not have given you that advice whenever you bulk you WILL gain weight and will not burn off fat because of the caloric surplus. Eat below maintenance lift three times a week (12-15) rep range and fill your other days of the week in with cardio.

    It drives me crazy when I see people who should be losing weight decide to bulk. Weightloss is hard it takes time and commitment it took me a little under a year to drop almost 70lbs. Key is consistency and being diligent with your diet. If weightloss was easy we wouldn't have an obesity problem.

    If you need workout programs geared toward weightloss I have many on my website. If you are interested just pm me :)
  • bokodasu
    bokodasu Posts: 629 Member
    Wow, yeah, someone gave you either some bad or seriously unclear advice. If you're going on a bulk, you're going to gain weight - that's what a bulk *is*. And around half-ish of it will be fat, which your body will store wherever it likes to store fat. The good news is that hey, you're stronger! So the next part is sort of easier.

    Keep doing what you're doing with the exercise (or go heavier if you feel like you can) but eat at a deficit, not a surplus. The goal here is to keep the muscle you've added and lose the fat, so you want to keep fueling your body, just... not quite so much. Somewhere between 10-20% less than your TDEE should be good. Yes, 6 weeks is too short for a bulk but you shouldn't be bulking right now anyway so I wouldn't worry too much about that.

    The fat will come off in the same way you put it on - it's going to stick to the parts it likes to stick to for as long as it can, so you will need to be patient on that part.
  • dondimitri
    dondimitri Posts: 245 Member
    Why am I not changing? ... Am I eating too much?

    In my very uneducated with respect to diet opinion: yes.
  • NovemberJune
    NovemberJune Posts: 2,525 Member
    I agree ^

    If you are eating over maintenance calories, you will gain fat and (if you are lifting) muscle. Many people choose to stay on a deficit until their fat is at a comfortable level (for them), then to bulk for a good long while, then go on a deficit again to lose the fat gained.
  • kkaci5
    kkaci5 Posts: 59 Member
    I also think things look worse before they look better. I've lost 28 pounds, and I would say that my fat areas, as they LOSE fat, look worse because things are ... uh ... sort of floppy. It's because there is LESS fat there though, so it's all good ... or will be eventually :-P.
  • katy_trail
    katy_trail Posts: 1,992 Member
    well, you're not saying how long you've been doing this, but in addition to the fat they are referring to, some of that could be water retention in your muscles. I didn't realize at first that's what it was, because I didn't feel bloated, my belly area wasn't bigger, my body felt not really any different than normal. I wasn't feeling very sore from my lifting, but measuring showed 1/2 inch difference in my muscles from the week before, so do measure.

    Definitely, you need to do a 'cut' so you can see your muscle. A bulk is better for when you're closer to your goal weight, so you can see the muscle.

    It sounds like you carry your weight in your legs/glutes area. Just eat 100g protein each day, have a small calorie deficit, and keep up with the workouts you're doing, I don't know if you need to lift heavier, i don't know your 1 rep max numbers, reps, sets, how you're feeling with the workouts,I just don't have enough info to answer those questions.

    I'm doing the same as what you'll be doing, so feel free to stalk my diary.
  • katy_trail
    katy_trail Posts: 1,992 Member
    I also think things look worse before they look better. I've lost 28 pounds, and I would say that my fat areas, as they LOSE fat, look worse because things are ... uh ... sort of floppy. It's because there is LESS fat there though, so it's all good ... or will be eventually :-P.

    Yes! definitely! often as we are changing some parts are more prominent than before.
  • TavistockToad
    TavistockToad Posts: 35,719 Member
    why on earth would you go on a BULK (ie willfully gain weight) when you are trying to REDUCE the size of your thighs?!

    work out your TDEE, minus off 20% and carry on with your exercise. stick with it for at least 6 weeks, and you WILL see a difference. dont just weigh though, take pictures & measurements as well.
  • katy_trail
    katy_trail Posts: 1,992 Member
    in your other thread you say you gained 4 pounds and described your BF being in the 20's, and that you're trying to get to body building status. that is fine and all, but not the impression you gave in this OP. Your BF is already in the healthy range.
  • been285
    been285 Posts: 99 Member
    Managing my state of mind is the MOST important part of my efforts to change.
    My attitude/ emotions gotta come first, then exercise, diet, become effortless.

    How much is having your result for the rest of your life worth ?
    How long are your willing to work for the result you want ??
    Would it be worth 3 years,,, if you knew that every day was bringing you closer to your goal ??

    Your body,,, till death do you part. How you gonna spend the rest of your life ?
  • MeIShouldB
    MeIShouldB Posts: 578 Member
    ...and HUGE. I literally broke down in tears yesterday. I know that you can't "spot lose" but you can certainly spot gain. I have been working diligently for the past six weeks to reduce my saddlebags and lift my butt about one million inches and nothing is happening.

    My musclehead friends suggested that I try to build muscle, so I went on a bulk... eating about 500 calories about maintenance and lifting weights HEAVILY (probably could go heavier) three times a week. The result... a beautiful upper body and the most disgusting thighs I have ever seen! Seriously... my butt seems to have dropped even lower and it just... moves. I have these two chunks sitting on the sides of my body and I just want to give up.

    I am currently doing full body workouts (deadlifts, squats, barbell rows, wood choppers, back extensions, dips, chin ups, abs, lunges) and HIIT. Why am I not changing? Should I get on fat burners? Cut the cardio? Am I not lifting enough? Am I eating too much?

    Seriously, this is really starting to depress me. PLEASE HELP!!!

    Do the 30 day squat challenge with me! I have a thread with my progress pics so far.
  • lilawolf
    lilawolf Posts: 1,690 Member
    To gain a decent amount of muscle you have to bulk, but a bulk will be around 30% glycogen/water, 30% muscle if you are lifting HEAVY so that means you need to push yourself, and 30% fat. All of these things make you BIGGER, and better and more awesome. Then you need to cut to get rid of the insulation on top of the lovely new muscle. At the end of a bulk/cut cycle you will be the same weight, but smaller because muscle is more dense then fat. Also, 500 cals over TDEE is too much for a woman. We can only gain .125-.25 lbs of muscle a week which is half of what a male can gain. If you are a new lifter, you will be at the top end of this. Clean bulks are usually done on a 1:1 ratio, so you want to gain half a pound a week plus your water. This translates to 250 extra cals a day. This is half of what a male can do with all of their delicious testosterone. Anything more than this is just extra, unnecessary fat that you will then have to cut.

    Nevertheless, you have to get through the bigger period to get to the more muscular slender period. If you can't handle this, because you already feel big with the fat that you have, go back to cutting. Lifting is still important to maintain the muscle you have, and if you are a beginner perhaps gain some still, but do not expect your lifts to progress like they did while you were on a bulk. You just don't have the calories/nutrition to build as much muscle, but the fat should melt away.

    Pictures and measurements are important no matter what you do. With the extra water/glycogen you are carrying, you may not see the loss on your scale even if you are losing fat.

    Good luck!