Should I quit my job to pursue fitness?

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I am new to these boards, but my intention in posting today is to find some real support. I have a lot of support in my weight loss journey from a friend, but at the same time, I know he cannot truly understand how I am feeling since he has never been as heavy as me.

I am 33 and I am 125 lbs overweight. I recently went back to university to pursue my dreams.

My weight gain started about 5-7 years ago, but only very recently have I been trying to make REAL changes. I have reached my tipping point in my weight or some would call it rock bottom. I don't feel very positive about it all. Instead I am feeling completely overwhelmed and out of control. I have made many attempts to eat healthy over the past four months. I did good for one month (not restricting calories, but just eating healthy), but then rebounded for two, after eating wings just once. Each day I ate bad when I rebounded, I found myself just feeling miserable. The truth is, I feel like I have so many issues hitting me all at once right now. Even just talking about my weight makes me cry (I am an emotional person - but not this emotional!). I went to my doctor for additional support, but her solution was to give me anxiety medication. Its been two weeks and I haven't touched the pills. I don't belive that pills are a solution. Anyways, my energy is so low that in university, I have been barely maintaining a 60% courseload, which is not normal. My boyfriend tells me that I am always saying I am sick or that I am tired - that is not healthy!

Anyways, Last sumer I got this job that pays great, but it was overnight from 10 pm to 6 am. I hated every minute of working this job because I am not a day sleeper and each day I would get only 3-5 hours of sleep. However, I needed the money to continue in school, and so I did it. I was called back this year, and I agreed to come back. However, as the days come closer to the start date, I find myself feeling even more overwhelmed. Financially, I can take a summer off to pursue my weight loss, but it may mean taking a year off school - it depends on several factors that are unknown to me right now. I really just feel like I need some of these pressures off of me to be able to focus on losing this weight. Even if it means just getting a head start on weight loss and feeling happy again. I don't feel happy. What i feel is uncomfortable in my own skin and unsure of myself (not confident). I want great things in life, but I can never do these things feeling FAT. The confidence isn't there to make a great life for myself.

I feel that making these changes might change everything. I feel like I would do better in school, I would get that better job, and that I would just be great at EVERYTHING if I wasn't overweight.

I really need some advice here from people who have been there and who can understand. Do I take that time off from work or do I suck it up and do the job (like most people do)?

Replies

  • sorryfrench
    sorryfrench Posts: 163 Member
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    I understand how you feel, but personally I don't think you should put off school or work. Because you can't just drop everything to become fit. Losing weight shouldn't become a diet you do for a while, when you don't have any other obligations. Its something you need to commit to for the rest of your life, so there aren't really any timeouts. Its a lifestyle!
    You"ll just have to figure out a way to balance it all out.
    I work on my feet 8 hours a day, 6 days a week. I go to school. And I am planning house move and a wedding. I just manage my time as best as I can. If I can do it, so can you!
    Again, this is just my personal opinion. Do what makes you happy.
  • rubypond
    rubypond Posts: 41 Member
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    That is a decision that you need to make on your own. If you are financially able to but then if you do you have to quit school, they are all pros and cons you need to weigh for yourself. You have to decide if fitness is more important to you then continuing with your education. I can tell you what I would do. If it were me, I would continue with my education. You can always work on your fitness as well, there are a ton of programs out there that will let you fit in some exercises. There is always time for exercise even it is only 10 minutes a day.
  • EngineerPrincess
    EngineerPrincess Posts: 306 Member
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    I feel your situation, I am a full time university student as well and I work two jobs, both >10 hours a week (don't tell either job about the other one lol.) It's always tempting to sit back in the summer and focus on other projects, hang with friends, or relax, but I find that I never get much done unless I'm forced to do it. The busier I am, the more productive I actually am. You might find that if you don't have your job, you won't be able to muster the discipline to make yourself focus on fitness. If I don't work I spend hours cooking and eating and walking on the treadmill, when I would have gotten that much walking in (and much less food) at work.
    Lastly, being thinner will not necessarily get you a better job or more energy. I have VERY little energy because of anxiety and stress, and it's actually gotten worse as I got thinner. Being a healthy weight is great, but it's not everything.

    I would advise not quitting your job, but you know yourself, and situation best!
  • marygee1951
    marygee1951 Posts: 148 Member
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    You've got a lot of decisions to make.

    I wouldn't give up school or the job. I think you would end up regretting it if you did.
    Losing weight won't solve all of life's problems - but you will feel better.
    You said that you did good by eating healthy - that's the best way to go. Don't go on any crazy diet - just eat healthy. If you go on a diet you will add more stress and you don't need that.
    Take the medication the doctor prescribed - it will help you deal with the stress. The medication is a tool that will help you.

    I wish you the best of luck -- keep reading and posting! :flowerforyou:
  • beyondjupiter
    beyondjupiter Posts: 247 Member
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    It sounds like the job and school combined may just be too stressful for you. I go to school full time and work part time and this is with 2 kids and a house to maintain. I feel your pain!!

    I would not stop school by any means. If you don't go during the summer, that is one thing. Personally, my loans don't cover the summer.

    If you can afford to (and seriously afford to) I would take some time off of work and then maybe find another job that is not a night job. It doesn't sound like it suits you or your lifestyle well.

    Only you can make this decision but we are happy to help weigh in. No matter what though, I would stick with school, even if a job goes by the wayside for now.

    Jen
  • JJordon
    JJordon Posts: 857 Member
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    Why not simply log your food, stay atop your macros, and get in 40 good minutes of exercise six days a week? I work overtime, every week (55-60 hours), full-time college student, and yeah, it sucks, but I'm getting it done, like a boss. You can too.
  • upgetupgetup
    upgetupgetup Posts: 749 Member
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    I've worked 3rd shift, that sucked. The people I know who've worked overnight have ALL wound up with serious sleep and mood problems. Can you find a job with normal hours? And supplement the difference in pay with a little loan?
  • johnknappcc
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    Ok, there are two scenarios based on your username.

    1) You are already a Java programmer (like myself), and maybe you're burnt out and are pursuing another major. Or
    2) You are studying to become a programmer?

    I don't know your situation, but don't quit. Anyway, don't quit, working a desk job . . . It's hard to stay fit, but it also costs a lot of money to be able to keep fit (gym, trainer, healthy food, equipment).

    It's a lot easier to be working and not worry about the money aspect and focus on your fitness goals.

    I was in the same boat, albeit slightly less weight to lose. It's only hard in the beginning. Now I get to work early, leave early and workout, and enjoy time with my family afterwards. Once you hit your stride, you'll be fine. I feel awesome 90% of the time.

    Also, keep in mind, taking time off or quitting your job is only going to have a negative effect on your future prospects.
  • angelamary61
    angelamary61 Posts: 97 Member
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    You sound like you may be using your weight and fitness issues to get out of doing a job you dont want to do, while I understand that, I think you cant drop out of your life so to speak to focus on this, sounds like a cop out to me.
    Health and fitness needs to be a part of your life, not one or the other.
    Maybe look for a job more suited, even something you can do at home online, there are some of those not that I have done them. I work full time but when things were tough I worked weekends cleaning at an old folks home as well and the interaction with them kept my moral up.
    Sorry to be a downer but you cant escape 'life' for a while.
    Get out there and grab it with everything youve got and run with it I say. You only get one. Make it count.
    :flowerforyou:
  • redraidergirl2009
    redraidergirl2009 Posts: 2,560 Member
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    You shouldn't have to quit your job to have time for fitness. You shouldn't even be exercising more than an hour or two tops per day. Go exercise before or after work like most people. Start small. Work your way up.
  • meganmjo
    meganmjo Posts: 9
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    Reply to Frockabillygi .

    LOL we sound alot alike. I had just finished my house move, I am also planning a wedding (on a budget) I work 3 12 hour shifts, I go to school full time and I have a three year old. I have only been doing my fitness pal for about 3 weeks and I haven't lost hardly any weight, but last night a coworker asked if I had lost any. I said not really and she said, Well then it must be in inches because you look like you are losing size. Oh the busy life.
  • MariaHammer750
    MariaHammer750 Posts: 86 Member
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    I wouldn't want to advise you one way or the other but thought it worth while to mention that my doctor has told me and I have also read that there is a direct correlation between lack of sleep and hunger/cravings. It makes sense because if you are tired, your body needs fuel to keep it going if you aren't re-fueling it enough with sleep.
  • meganmjo
    meganmjo Posts: 9
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    Now, for the topic at hand. I don't think you are using your fitness to get out of anything and I understand that you don't want to do this just to be skinny either. You may want to see this as a decision between your HEALTH or school situation. I get that you don't need to work UNLESS you want to go to school. Tell your boss that you can work part time and see if you can enroll in school for only part time. 6 instead of 12 units. take out a small loan so you can go to school and not have to work just that ONE year. Your health is important. I am 180 lbs overweight. I now have plantar fasciitis in both feet, I literally can't find my size at any store, sometimes not even Lane Bryant. I am tired all the time and I fear type 2 diabetes constantly. The pain in my feet is unbearable and I cry when I walk sometimes. How would working like that sound? Maybe you can take some classes online that transfer. If you don't take care of your weight then health issue will come and then there may not be an opportunity to go to school anymore. The first thing you have to take care of is yourself. But, ask yourself, If you miss a year of school, will you go back after you have managed your new healthy lifestyle? If you are afraid that you won't go back, find work elsewhere. You don't have to go back to THAT job. Maybe there is one that would tolerate your schedule, but you have to look for it. This is a very difficult situation for you and I hope you find out what works best for you. I can't quit working because I would be homeless (including my son) so my weight loss is slower than I would like. And maybe that's how it will work for you. Slowly but surely wins the race. Good luck and keep coming back to the forums, there are encouraging people sometimes :)
  • xxfreakyrockxx
    xxfreakyrockxx Posts: 6 Member
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    I did just that. I quit my job for my health. I was a stockbroker, and had to travel often, getting out of the airport late nights, eating McDonald's, fast food, whatever was open and within my company budget (a meager $25 for dinner, in fast food bucks, it was a lot I could buy). I gained over 50 pounds within 3 years of working at that firm. I was miserable! It came to a point where I didnt want to get water at the office because it was so visible to me with the weight gain. I had no self control, I worked with a team of handsome guys, all 6ft+ and 200lbs+ (eye candy in theory, not so good for my reality) and I ate with them all the time...lunch, after work drinks, bar foods. I worked long hours, traveled and barely slept. My job was accelerating some form of insomnia, averaging 3-5 hours of sleep daily. And waking up many times at night from nightmares. And during the daytime I started to suffer from debilitating migraines, taking excedrine on a daily basis. I got married in November 2012 and even with a wedding I could not lose weight. It was months of thinking, analyzing our budget, prioritizing our goals (buying a house, vacationing, starting a family etc.) that i finally decided at 27, if I dont get my weight in line, i will suffer badly down the line, and at my current weight the mere thought of pregnancy would make my body collapse. I cant handle this weight, for me to add another human being (20-30pounds during 9 months) would be dangerous and irresponsible.
    Those were just my thought process to quitting. But off course, every situation is different, I would take a detailed analysis of your situation. Are you financially able to handle it? Are you mentally prepared for what's ahead? What's are your goals when you achieve your desired weight, etc etc. Sorry for the long rambling.
  • Jmchao
    Jmchao Posts: 27 Member
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    I have reached my tipping point in my weight or some would call it rock bottom. I don't feel very positive about it all. Instead I am feeling completely overwhelmed and out of control.

    Each day I ate bad when I rebounded, I found myself just feeling miserable. The truth is, I feel like I have so many issues hitting me all at once right now.

    Even just talking about my weight makes me cry (I am an emotional person - but not this emotional!).

    I went to my doctor for additional support, but her solution was to give me anxiety medication. Its been two weeks and I haven't touched the pills. I don't belive that pills are a solution.

    Anyways, my energy is so low that in university, I have been barely maintaining a 60% courseload, which is not normal.

    My boyfriend tells me that I am always saying I am sick or that I am tired - that is not healthy!

    The confidence isn't there to make a great life for myself.

    I feel that making these changes might change everything. I feel like I would do better in school, I would get that better job, and that I would just be great at EVERYTHING if I wasn't overweight.

    I really need some advice here from people who have been there and who can understand. Do I take that time off from work or do I suck it up and do the job (like most people do)?

    These are the points that stick out to me the most. I really think you need to reconsider working with your doctor and trying the medication she offered. It truly sounds like you have a touch of depression, which is OK if you do!! You are HUMAN!! You won't have to take them forever, but see if they help! Here's my story:

    About a year ago, I began feeling overwhelmed. I was unhappy about my weight. Frustrated that school was taking as long as it is. Wishing I was in a position to help alleviate my husband's stress by being able to offer more financially to our family. I work part time and after 4 years there, started making errors on my paperwork?! I began to notice that it took all my energy to get out of bed each day and put one foot in front of the other. I complained of headaches regularly and feeling "blah". I lost the enjoyment of doing things I usually LOVED doing, such as arts/crafts, baking, reading, etc. My daughter complained that I never did anything with her and I only just slept. I cried all the time, even as silly commercials on TV!! I didn't even have the motivation to go grocery shopping for my family. I kept trying to "push past it", "fake it till you make it", "put on a happy face", etc. But day after day, I drudged on feeling down and miserable. When my father suddenly and unexpectedly passed away at a young age in May, that was the last straw. I knew I needed help.

    I went and talked to a counselor that I had seen before and she suggested talking with my doctor about medications. I felt the same way you did-meds weren't the answer! But, I knew I couldn't carry on the way I was. So, I made an appointment. I went in and found myself bawling like a baby when I talked to her. She listened patiently, gave me a box of tissue and a big hug, and started talking. We decided on Lexapro 10mg for me. She also promised me that it didn't need to be a permanent thing! So, I took them. Within a couple of weeks, I felt AMAZINGLY better! I had no idea just how bad I felt until I felt better!! After a couple of months, I began baking again and my husband, who enjoys eating all of my goodies, teased me that he was going to hide my meds so I'd stop baking again and he could lose weight again ;)

    It felt great to know that others noticed my improvements as well.

    I decided to stay on the meds for about 1 year. During that time, I began watching my diet and adding in a jog/walk routine. I wanted to make sure that I was setting myself up for the "natural highs" of diet/exercise. With my doctor's advice, I began weaning off my meds. I've been med-free for about 3 months now and I still feel great.

    For me, I needed some help to get through a hiccup in my life. There is NOTHING to be ashamed of. We all needs various tools to help us get through our lives. Some tools we use regularly, some we use temporarily. If you need to use some meds temporarily as a tool to help you through a challenging time in your life, then don't be ashamed.

    You sound completely overwhelmed and rightfully so. Why not take a few days, maybe talk with your boyfriend and doctor, and consider trying the meds? You may find they give you that extra "oomph" you need to start feeling better emotionally, which will then lead to moving more and focusing on your physical wellbeing. Once you get going in the right direction, and feel good about your goals and your achievements, talk with your doctor about coming off the medication (never stop any sort of anxiety med or antidepressant cold turkey!!) and continuing on your own.

    Sure, some things of meds as a crutch...but if you break your foot, don't you use crutches until it heals? Same here...if you need meds to help balance things out until you feel better, why not use what's available to you?

    Good luck. It's not an easy journey to take, and I felt completely ashamed about having to use meds at first. Now, a year+ later, I understand after having been there myself that depression can suck the life right out of you.