introduction: BINGE EATER IN NEED OF SERIOUS HELP!!!! D':

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xvegivorex
xvegivorex Posts: 31
in Introduce Yourself
hi I'm sari and i turn 31 friday OMG were 2 start-

i joined MFP a year ago but got so discouraged that i actually GAINED 15 lbs. in a year rather than lost, i quit my account and started a fresh one hoping THIS time i would stop the binge eating for good. I've been to OA (overeaters anonymous) but never found a sponsor i got along with. i feel i am eating myself to death at this rate.

i'm 4'9 and 164. my highest weight ever came on monday - it was 166. my goal is 100, and I'm eating 20% below my TDEE now for 1426 cals/day so I'm hoping to lose about .5 lb/week or so. if i don't binge lol. my biggest problem is night eating so i dont eat breakfast. and I'm logy in the morning so i have caffeine all day then at night i binge cuz no breakfast, etc. etc. endless cycle OMG

i started night eating in college in 2000/2001 when i was 18/19 or so and gained the Freshman 15 times TWO (er…THIRTY POUNDS!) in two months and it's been a battle of the bulge-and the BINGE--ever since :(

I've even stolen food out of people's fridges and freezers and from the dorm garbage cans back in college. I've eaten frozen, uncooked baked goods out of the freezer at my folks' house in the middle of the night. I used to beg people for money for the candy machines back in those old college days too…my mom hides food from me but i find it, sadly.

anyway, i digress- anyway what i am looking for here is strong support, healthy motivation, and in general someone to kick my butt! my dad and mom try, but they are so mean and insulting my dad said 'its time to pick a burial plot for you' and 'you are basically losing the battle [with weight]. you will soon be walking with cane and then people will just think you are old.' - as i said i will be 31 fri.

i really want to lose wight because i have pain in all my joints, my feet have a birth defect which weight now complicates and makes walking difficult, I AM on federal and state disability but DO NOT want to stay this was BY GOD i am THIRTY FRIGGIN ONE FRIDAY! :(

i really hope to get some support on this site this time. last time was really touch and go, tbqh.

so…yea.

Replies

  • tatd_820
    tatd_820 Posts: 573 Member
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    So sorry you are living this...and for so long. Use this as the turning point in your life and form new, healthier habits. Sounds to me like you live with your parents? Or do you live alone? If alone, throw out all the junk. I mean, really throw it out and do not buy it again. Find some healthy things that you like. I like food in general....any of it. So for me, it's all about choosing the healthy option vs. the unhealthy option. So, instead of a candy bar, fruit, or cottage cheese or a yogurt. Instead of chips and dip, edamame. Instead of a burger from the local fast food joint, their lowest calorie salad with low cal dressing. Instead of mayo, mustard. Instead of flour tortillas, corn. One thing I had to tell myself over and over a million times is that I deserved to be healthy, I deserve to be fit, I deserve to look and feel good. The first time I passed up fast food or threw away some food, I felt so good and like I finally had control. YOU are in control......YOU control everything you put into your mouth. My goals aren't in a # on the scale....they were and still are to be healthy, fit and strong. A year later....I am. You can be too. Feel free to add me if you want!
  • xvegivorex
    xvegivorex Posts: 31
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    i do live with my parents actually, sorry if that was a little ambiguous lol.

    and my dad is always bringing home things i crave when he binge drinks and gets the cravings himself (he's obese and an alcoholic and smokes and my mom is overweight, maybe obese at this point?) they are both in their sixties and they buy full fat ice cream, big bags of potato chips, pizza from takeout or homemade but i ALWAYS binge on pizza :( then my food-obsessed aunt comes over and in the same breath as telling me im fat (and her failed trip with me to the nutritionist, who directed me here BTW) offers me cinnamon rolls, cookies, etc. which i initially decline but sneak later. and she brings TWELVE desserts to family gatherings and my mom never throws out a CRUMB, freezing what we dont eat at the affair - only for me to sneak and binge later. and my mom and dad both take out food from any restaurant, conference or meeting they go to nd who ends up initially declining it (even while at said meeting) but sneaking it later? yours friggin truly! :(

    NO ONE supports me - EVERYONE sabotages me - THEY ALWAYS ridicule, belittle and disbelieve my ever valiant (albeit hapless and ill-gotten) effort to lose weight. I JUST GET SO-discouraged… *cries*… D':
  • tparsley1
    tparsley1 Posts: 5
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    Hello Sari, I am Teresa, a fellow life-time binge-sneak eater. I am 42 years old, 5'5' and 191 pounds- not my highest in weight, but nothing to be proud of either. My goal is 150 despite doctors telling me I should be at 125. You name it, I have tried it. Weight Watchers, Nutri-system, Richard Simmon's Deal a Meal, Beyond Diet, Atkins, and I even had the lap band surgery TWICE! My only success last nearly 4 years, when I joined a gym and began counting calories with the help of a trainer. That was 7 years and 40 some pounds ago.

    I can sympathize and relate to everything you have posted so far. I would love to chat with you some more- but I do not have anymore time this evening. I would like to respond more to you tomorrow if you are willing to read.

    I will leave you with this thought, every day is a new day with new choices and decisions. You can only be responsible for today, not yesterday, and not tomorrow.

    I look forward to chatting with you more tomorrow. :smile:
  • missezwright
    missezwright Posts: 10 Member
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    Hello, my name is Lindsay and I'm 30 years old. After having three children I hit my largest point of 250 lbs. I've lost 25 just to come back to the same weight again. I also live in a house where my husband and kids can eat all they want and not gain a thing. I use to eat right with them. I especially would pig out on sweets. I just started this fitness pal which is awesome help, but before this for two weeks I've been taking phentermine prescribed by my doctor. it has been amazing so far. it limits my appetite and takes away the cravings that way I can control what I eat. hopefully I can lose the weight and make the new routine a habit so I can keep the weight off. I don't know how you feel about a medicine, but it's just a suggestion and has been a miracle for me so far. I've lost almost 10 lbs in about 2 1/2 weeks. I completely understand what you are going through and I hope you find something that works for you. goodluck
  • Feyleaf
    Feyleaf Posts: 1
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    I have a really good idea that helps me. I drink a lot of seltzer water which is just carbonated water. It is fizzy which is satisfying and it doesn't taste like regular clear sodas like sprite or 7up which I don't like. If you get a snack craving, drink one or two cans of those! I drank a can with everything and eventually I felt unsatisfied with sweet sodas.
  • WildcatMom82
    WildcatMom82 Posts: 564 Member
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    I'm sorry you're in such an unsupportive environment, I really think a large part of me not binging is not buying the main trigger foods anymore (mainly ice cream, sugar cereals, and chocolate chips). Other coping things that have worked for me are making sure my calorie goals aren't too low AND saving around 500 for the after dinner hours when I know I'll eat. That would obviously be hard with a calorie goal of 1400. Working out can be a lifesaver in that case, I burn anywhere from 500-800 a day according to my HRM and therefore have that extra cushion to try and prevent the binging. I also find the days I don't workout I binge a lot more often, it's like making the effort to burn cals makes me not want to consume them as much.

    Honestly, though, I started calorie counting in college, now 10 years ago. When I started I took days off intentionally to binge. Then I was eating too low (1200 and no workout cals back - I didn't know about net cals then) and was binging still. It has taken a very long time to get a handle on this behavior. Don't get me wrong, I lost the weight! But the binges were a constant struggle. In a roundabout way I'm trying to say don't get discouraged because it's not an easy behavior to overcome. Maybe keep trying OA? Are there anymore close to you you could try? I've always wanted to go, but the thought makes me anxious. I've listened to a lot of the radio files on their site and it seems like it could really be the supportive circle you need. It's a hard thing to live with and, in my experience, a hard thing for people outside of it to understand.
  • Chibea
    Chibea Posts: 363 Member
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    You are not alone. Lots of people on here will support you!!

    Find the Binge Eaters Support Group on here and you will have many people who know what you are going through and are supporting each other to overcome it. Many of us post every day and have a monthly challenge to do better. Progress not perfection. Please join us!!
  • tparsley1
    tparsley1 Posts: 5
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    Chibea's comment was very good- I myself will be looking for the binge eating support group. Every day, almost every moment I am thinking about what I could eat. But every day, every moment I make a better choice, it gets a little easier to turn away from all the 'bad' foods I really enjoy.

    I am currently in week 2 of My Fitness Pal tracking ( the 3rd time around of course). I am extremely discouraged because I have not seen my usual 3-5 pound drop (water weight) in the first week. So I have made the decision to check the message boards, take a walk, drink another bottle of water, or other activity to keep me busy and NOT thinking about food. It helps motivate me to see how many pounds other people have lost. I can imagine what I would be like and how I would feel if I were to lose that amount. Like I said before, every day is a little bit easier.

    I can also relate with you in the area of living with unhealthy eaters who do not care. My husband's idea of a diet is to starve all day and eat whatever he wants for dinner. When he is not dieting, he consumes 2+ cups of butter weekly in addition to all his other bad habits. I finally told him that I will make a healthy lunch for him every day, but he needs to be in charge of his dinner. I do not want to be tempted by unhealthy choices. Therefore, we do not sit down to eat togetherr. I always eat before he gets home.

    You have a marvelous opportunity to set a good example for your family while creating a better life for yourself. When it gets tough, TALK to someone. When you are tempted, walk away and TALK to someone or post in the message board. You just need to distract yourself. Self control is not something I am good at. However, I do know that my self control gets better the longer I make the right choices.

    Good luck to you!
  • angieleighbyrd
    angieleighbyrd Posts: 989 Member
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    I'm a binge eater as well, feel free to add me.


    I've actually had several binges over the last 2 months. I have no idea how I haven't put on 10 pounds. My average binges are anywhere from 15-25K calories....and I've gone over that...

    Night time seems to be a trigger for me as well. I think it's because my house is a little more chaotic at night...all of the kids are home, my husband is home and it's not just me and my youngest anymore and I'm not as in control as I am during the day...

    The only thing that helps me lately is just staying away from food in general. If I start to feel out of control I have to drag myself out of the kitchen and sometimes I end up just going back to bed. Getting out of the house actually makes it worse for me because I end up stopping at a restaurant....

    I haven't binged since the 11th and that's the longest streak I've had in 2 months.

    IDK what changed the last couple of months but before that my binges were almost completely under control.
  • stayingp0sitive
    stayingp0sitive Posts: 9
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    This sounds a lot like what I have been going through. My overeating as well was what encouraged me to join - I'm glad you have returned! :) That just shows you ARE determined to do this. You may have started over here a few times, but you at least have returned. I mean, you could have really just never come back - but you did. And that is a success itself. :) I heard that you should try your best to eat the majority of your calories earlier in the day. That's supposed to help you with not craving so much later at night time. Also, you NEED to eat breakfast! It really is the most important meal of the day. I never used to eat it, but it really does make a difference. I wish you the best of luck. I believe in you! YOU CAN DO IT!

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