'You don't need to lose weight' NOT ENCOURAGING!

Emmaj47
Emmaj47 Posts: 19 Member
in Health and Weight Loss
I am just about in the healthy weight in the BMI and I would not call myself 'fat' I like to say chubby or curvy. But I am by no means thin, but obviously I want to be thin. It's just so annoying when I tell people I'm on a diet and what size I would like to be they all say 'you don't need to lose weight' or 'no you will look silly that size'
Maybe I should be happy that they think I am already an okay size and look good but it just pisses me off. I'm not happy this size and I'm going to change it! I just wish people could be happy for me that I am changing myself for the better and being who I want to be!

Replies

  • zaneyard
    zaneyard Posts: 28
    People are just jealous that you're putting forth the effort to better yourself and they don't want to take the time.
  • deadbeatsummer
    deadbeatsummer Posts: 537 Member
    Maybe if you focused on words other than 'thin' and 'dieting' - others would understand better (not only that - but it would make it a more healthy goal for you too, mentally.

    Instead of 'dieting' - why not say you are trying to eat healthy, nutritiously, eat more organically, get more protein in, get more healthy fats in, eat more healthily to fuel your workouts (whatever your thing is)

    Instead of saying you want to get 'thin' - why not say you are aiming to be stronger, reducing your body fat percentage, you are increasing your fitness levels to become fantastic at running, zumba, weight training (whatever), you are aiming to get fit and healthy and more active.

    These are ideals that make it more of a worthwhile goal, a healthy and positive goal, and things that no one can really argue with. People can argue why you shouldn't be aiming to get 'thin', but can you imagine someone arguing with you that you shouldn't be trying to get more 'healthy' or 'fit' or 'strong'?
  • MissMormie
    MissMormie Posts: 359 Member
    Maybe if you focused on words other than 'thin' and 'dieting' - others would understand better (not only that - but it would make it a more healthy goal for you too, mentally.

    Instead of 'dieting' - why not say you are trying to eat healthy, nutritiously, eat more organically, get more protein in, get more healthy fats in, eat more healthily to fuel your workouts (whatever your thing is)

    Instead of saying you want to get 'thin' - why not say you are aiming to be stronger, reducing your body fat percentage, you are increasing your fitness levels to become fantastic at running, zumba, weight training (whatever), you are aiming to get fit and healthy and more active.

    These are ideals that make it more of a worthwhile goal, a healthy and positive goal, and things that no one can really argue with. People can argue why you shouldn't be aiming to get 'thin', but can you imagine someone arguing with you that you shouldn't be trying to get more 'healthy' or 'fit' or 'strong'?

    ^ This exactly.
  • sussexbythesea
    sussexbythesea Posts: 1,336 Member
    Maybe if you focused on words other than 'thin' and 'dieting' - others would understand better (not only that - but it would make it a more healthy goal for you too, mentally.

    Instead of 'dieting' - why not say you are trying to eat healthy, nutritiously, eat more organically, get more protein in, get more healthy fats in, eat more healthily to fuel your workouts (whatever your thing is)

    Instead of saying you want to get 'thin' - why not say you are aiming to be stronger, reducing your body fat percentage, you are increasing your fitness levels to become fantastic at running, zumba, weight training (whatever), you are aiming to get fit and healthy and more active.

    These are ideals that make it more of a worthwhile goal, a healthy and positive goal, and things that no one can really argue with. People can argue why you shouldn't be aiming to get 'thin', but can you imagine someone arguing with you that you shouldn't be trying to get more 'healthy' or 'fit' or 'strong'?

    ^ This exactly.

    Agreed but even if you are top of healthy 10kg sounds like a lot to lose
  • skinnytayy
    skinnytayy Posts: 459
    I'm 5'2 & my starting weight was 217 ... People told me ALL the time that I didn't need to lose weight b/c I looked fine. Clearly I need to lose nearly 80lbs to even be in the high end of the healthy range so it was annoying. However, I think most people don't know how to react when you tell them you're trying to lose weight. Most don't want to be like, "oh that's good, you could definitely use it." or something to that effect. So I think that's why. Others may just be jealous ... wishing they had the motivation to lose weight. I wouldn't pay it any attention. Its your body and your decision. Its never silly to be lean nor is it silly to be healthier.

    & I agree with the person who said to use different terms when describing what you're doing. I think more people would refrain from those type of remarks if you sounded more serious and not like the average yo-yo dieter. I NEVER EVER tell people I'm dieting .. I simply say I'm eating healthier and laying off the junk. If they ask, I'll go in depth about my specific eating habits. My goal is to be healthier, stronger, and to just be a more active person. So that's what I tell them. =)
  • phyl88
    phyl88 Posts: 51 Member
    Maybe if you focused on words other than 'thin' and 'dieting' - others would understand better (not only that - but it would make it a more healthy goal for you too, mentally.

    Instead of 'dieting' - why not say you are trying to eat healthy, nutritiously, eat more organically, get more protein in, get more healthy fats in, eat more healthily to fuel your workouts (whatever your thing is)

    Instead of saying you want to get 'thin' - why not say you are aiming to be stronger, reducing your body fat percentage, you are increasing your fitness levels to become fantastic at running, zumba, weight training (whatever), you are aiming to get fit and healthy and more active.

    These are ideals that make it more of a worthwhile goal, a healthy and positive goal, and things that no one can really argue with. People can argue why you shouldn't be aiming to get 'thin', but can you imagine someone arguing with you that you shouldn't be trying to get more 'healthy' or 'fit' or 'strong'?

    ^ This exactly.
  • phyl88
    phyl88 Posts: 51 Member
    Maybe if you focused on words other than 'thin' and 'dieting' - others would understand better (not only that - but it would make it a more healthy goal for you too, mentally.

    Instead of 'dieting' - why not say you are trying to eat healthy, nutritiously, eat more organically, get more protein in, get more healthy fats in, eat more healthily to fuel your workouts (whatever your thing is)

    Instead of saying you want to get 'thin' - why not say you are aiming to be stronger, reducing your body fat percentage, you are increasing your fitness levels to become fantastic at running, zumba, weight training (whatever), you are aiming to get fit and healthy and more active.

    These are ideals that make it more of a worthwhile goal, a healthy and positive goal, and things that no one can really argue with. People can argue why you shouldn't be aiming to get 'thin', but can you imagine someone arguing with you that you shouldn't be trying to get more 'healthy' or 'fit' or 'strong'?

    ^ This exactly.
  • Cr01502
    Cr01502 Posts: 3,614 Member
    You don't need to lose too much weight (*ducks and hides*) judging by your photos.

    My suggestion would be to focus on body composition. Focus on your macros, eat at a slight deficit, and begin resistance training.
  • Tisha247
    Tisha247 Posts: 849 Member
    I get really annoyed when people tell me I don't need to lose weight, facts are I may only be 2 kg's over-weight but I am over-weight full stop. And what's wrong with trying to look the best you can or be more comfortable in your own skin. I know jogging and all exercise would be so much easier when thinner, why aren't I allowed to feel more comfortable. I also find that people saying this to me has a physiological effect on my willpower, I start thinking I'm not too bad. Tell them to shut up or just don't tell people.
  • getfitcharles
    getfitcharles Posts: 78
    I think this attitude comes from people not wanting to sound like they're calling you fat. They don't want to make people feel more insecure about their bodies.
  • spamantha57
    spamantha57 Posts: 674 Member
    They'll say that when you start gaining your first 10 or 20lbs. By the time you gain 30, 40 & 50 they're making fun of you & no one asks you out anymore.
    Just venting my personal experience.
  • suzieb41
    suzieb41 Posts: 15
    oh this really winds me up. At my heaviest, I was a size 18, which was too big. I started losing weight, and people reacted well at first, but then started looking at me like I was ill! Yes, I did go quite low, and got a size 10 (which was my lowest ever, and yeah....pretty impossible for me to personaly maintain).
    Anyway, I then lost my focus, stopped exercising and regained 20lbs (I had lost just over 40), so decided enough was enough, and I wasn't going to go back to where I started, so once again I am counting calories and have restarted exercise.
    People are acting like I have said I am going to start killing small animals! They look me up and down and say things like ''well, I don't know where you've put it, because you look exactly the same!!'' and stuff like that.
    I just have to laugh. I'm sorry but I've gone back up to a 14, and stop talking rubbish!!!
    People sometimes find it really difficult to see someone trying to improve themselves, it makes them feel bad about their unhealthy choices.

    Oh yes, and I ALWAYS get the old chestnut... ''but you're tall!''. Erm, so what? does that mean I can be overweight? What the hell kind of difference does that make? Yes I'm tall, so I can weigh more in actual pounds than someone shorter, but being overweight, or unhappy about a few extra pounds is exactly the same no matter how short or tall I am!
  • glovepuppet
    glovepuppet Posts: 1,710 Member
    people are likely assuming that you're dieting because you feel fat and unattractive.
  • pollyineedtobeskinny
    pollyineedtobeskinny Posts: 362
    Omg i feel this. :angry: it's so annoying.

    Why can't they turn around and say "that's great, good luck" it's "you are so silly, you dont even need to lose weight" no maybe not, but i WANT to. So, suck my fat toe :laugh:
  • AngelicxAnnihilation
    AngelicxAnnihilation Posts: 336 Member
    People hear about dieting and they just go off the chain.. As seen on pintrest, "First they'll ask you WHY you're doing it, then they'll ask you HOW you did it." Don't pay much attention beautiful :)
  • supplemama
    supplemama Posts: 1,956 Member
    There are so many obese people nowadays, being merely overweight is normal. Did you know, back in the day, the Fat Lady at most circuses was only about 200 pounds?? That's right, people used to pay to ogle at a 200 pound woman. Nowadays no one would even blink at this.

    Don't talk about it, be about it. It's really no one else's business and shouldn't come up unless you bring it up. Stop bringing it up.
  • 5ftnFun
    5ftnFun Posts: 948 Member
    Stop telling people that you are on a diet and that you are aiming for a certain size. Don't bring it up. If food & exercise come up in conversation, don't go overboard in what you say. Just say that you are trying to eat better & be fit. That's all. I know there will be certain close friends & family who will push you at times, but this can still work to some degree.
  • ramblinritz
    ramblinritz Posts: 24 Member
    Why do you want to lose weight? Is it just to be thin? Thin is not always healthy. Your health is the most important thing, not just being a certain size or weight. Now after saying that, what you do to make your body the healthiest it can be is up to you and don't pay any attention to the ones who need to look at themselves and their lifestyle first. Maybe you're giving them a guilt trip. You do what is right and best for you and you'll succeed.
  • hollymartin90
    hollymartin90 Posts: 57 Member
    I am just about in the healthy weight in the BMI and I would not call myself 'fat' I like to say chubby or curvy. But I am by no means thin, but obviously I want to be thin. It's just so annoying when I tell people I'm on a diet and what size I would like to be they all say 'you don't need to lose weight' or 'no you will look silly that size'
    Maybe I should be happy that they think I am already an okay size and look good but it just pisses me off. I'm not happy this size and I'm going to change it! I just wish people could be happy for me that I am changing myself for the better and being who I want to be!

    quite a lot of my friends/family say to me I dont need to lose weight .Im in my normal range for my height but would no way describe myself as skinny/thin i wanna lose weight for me so find it annoying when people say this.think I have quite a slow metabolism so didnt eat too much to start with but if i wanna get healthier/more toned why shouldnt i??
  • norahwynn
    norahwynn Posts: 862 Member
    stop telling people that you're on a diet, then you won't have the rude comments.

    It doesn't matter if you're a size 20 or a size 2, you'll get your fair share of "oh, you don't need to lose weight". It's either out of jealousy, or because they don't want to be rude and say "hell yeah, it's about time!!"
  • JesterMFP
    JesterMFP Posts: 3,596 Member
    Call me crazy, but maybe they're trying to be nice.

    Regardless, people are going to have opinions, and if you don't want to hear them, I'd stop talking about your goals to those people. Just focus on what you're trying to achieve.
  • stealthq
    stealthq Posts: 4,298 Member
    Maybe if you focused on words other than 'thin' and 'dieting' - others would understand better (not only that - but it would make it a more healthy goal for you too, mentally.

    Instead of 'dieting' - why not say you are trying to eat healthy, nutritiously, eat more organically, get more protein in, get more healthy fats in, eat more healthily to fuel your workouts (whatever your thing is)

    Instead of saying you want to get 'thin' - why not say you are aiming to be stronger, reducing your body fat percentage, you are increasing your fitness levels to become fantastic at running, zumba, weight training (whatever), you are aiming to get fit and healthy and more active.

    These are ideals that make it more of a worthwhile goal, a healthy and positive goal, and things that no one can really argue with. People can argue why you shouldn't be aiming to get 'thin', but can you imagine someone arguing with you that you shouldn't be trying to get more 'healthy' or 'fit' or 'strong'?

    ^ This exactly.

    Agreed but even if you are top of healthy 10kg sounds like a lot to lose

    Do you mean that losing 10 kg might be unhealthy for her, or that it just sounds like a lot to most people and that is what they are reacting to?

    Because if it's the first, losing 20 lbs (~9 kg) took me from the very top of the healthy weight range to squarely in the middle. I'm still looking to decrease my %BF, so still cutting.

    If it's the second, I agree. I didn't believe I had 20 lbs to lose until I looked up the healthy weight range for me. And neither did anybody else.
  • aNewYear123
    aNewYear123 Posts: 279 Member
    Stop telling people that you are on a diet and that you are aiming for a certain size. Don't bring it up. If food & exercise come up in conversation, don't go overboard in what you say. Just say that you are trying to eat better & be fit. That's all. I know there will be certain close friends & family who will push you at times, but this can still work to some degree.

    If it annoys you then stop talking about it. Likely it is just people trying to tell you that you look good since most people diet when they feel like they are fat.

    If you put it out there then you need to be ready for people to respond either way - supporting you or telling you that you already look good and don't need to diet. (Besides other than good-luck anything supportive could come across as indicating that they do think you need to lose weight and so they think you are fat - it is a no win situation for other people when you tell them and expect them to respond)

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