Inner beauty vs. outward appearances

Mustang_Susie
Mustang_Susie Posts: 7,045 Member
What's more important to you?
How you look or your character?

What's more important to you in another person?

I would like to say that I'm more concerned about my character than my looks but I cannot tell a lie.

I do notice how other people look, but I know it's their character that will determine the depth of relationship I can/will have with them.

So, knowing that about myself, I would assume it would be the same for others.

I need to be beautiful on the inside :smile:
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Replies

  • diolpah
    diolpah Posts: 134 Member
    Interesting question. For me, at this point in my life, my appearance is more important than my intelligence, career, or character.

    Bear with me.

    I *already* have pretty ridiculous confidence in my professional and intellectual life, bordering on unbridled arrogance. It's a part of my life that I have already handled a long while ago.

    However, I still harbor absurd levels of self-image issues related to growing up as a fatty fat fat computer nerd. So getting to a point at which I am happy with myself physically would be a good balance to the crazy ego I have about the rest of myself. It is therefore more important at this point.
  • Mustang_Susie
    Mustang_Susie Posts: 7,045 Member
    Interesting question. For me, at this point in my life, my appearance is more important than my intelligence, career, or character.

    Bear with me.

    I *already* have pretty ridiculous confidence in my professional and intellectual life, bordering on unbridled arrogance. It's a part of my life that I have already handled a long while ago.

    However, I still harbor absurd levels of self-image issues related to growing up as a fatty fat fat computer nerd. So getting to a point at which I am happy with myself physically would be a good balance to the crazy ego I have about the rest of myself. It is therefore more important at this point.

    Interesting perspective.

    I sometimes wonder how much peoples' insecurities (both about character and looks) play into their efforts to improve their outward appearances...
  • _the_feniks_
    _the_feniks_ Posts: 3,412 Member
    Definitely character... but you can't motorboat personality.
  • _DaniD_
    _DaniD_ Posts: 2,186 Member
    I'm pretty sure there's a lot more to life than being really, really, ridiculously good looking. And I plan on finding out what that is.
  • _DaniD_
    _DaniD_ Posts: 2,186 Member
    Serious answer.. I want to be a happy person all around. Outward appearance only plays a small role in this.

    I want to be the best Mom in the history of Moms.
  • 2stepscloser
    2stepscloser Posts: 2,900 Member
    What's more important to you?
    How you look or your character?

    What's more important to you in another person?

    I would like to say that I'm more concerned about my character than my looks but I cannot tell a lie.

    I do notice how other people look, but I know it's their character that will determine the depth of relationship I can/will have with them.

    So, knowing that about myself, I would assume it would be the same for others.

    I need to be beautiful on the inside :smile:

    Definitely an interesting question! For me it comes down to self doubt. I have no doubt that my inner beauty is what makes me attractive; however, I have lots of doubts about my appearance. Therefore, at the current time, I am more concerned about my outward appearance. In regards to what I want in the other person, it depends on the type/length of relationship. I would definitely want a combination of both, with more emphasis on the inner beauty.
  • Mustang_Susie
    Mustang_Susie Posts: 7,045 Member
    Serious answer.. I want to be a happy person all around. Outward appearance only plays a small role in this.

    I want to be the best Mom in the history of Moms.

    :flowerforyou:

    Me too!
  • VeganSurfer
    VeganSurfer Posts: 383 Member
    Character is most important to me.
  • Hepburn43
    Hepburn43 Posts: 24 Member
    It's hard to fight evolution! Humans are designed to be attracted to the biggest, the prettiest etc. It's in our nature. That being said, inner beauty plays a lot into how long we decide to hang around. I find confidence (not arrogance) to be a great aphrodisiac. If you can make me laugh so hard I weep. We're going to be friends :wink:
  • M______
    M______ Posts: 288 Member
    Definitely my character. I go out of my way to treat people how I wish to be treated, never judge a book by it's cover and will make time and help anyone. Really thats what I care about in life. Having a positive influence on those around me is important, as I get those qualities back from friends and family. That is what makes me feel good and keeps me going, I think thats the substance of life.

    My health is so much more important to me than how I look. I'm a little self conscious but I think most people are. Health is the thing for me tho, the more healthy the greater I feel, and thats what I tend to show anyone from strangers to people I'm close to on a daily basis. I care a lot about making the effort, the better I feel the more effort I make. :)

    In another person, say a potential girlfriend. If I don't know you but there is 1 thing I find attractive about you - that is enough for me to explore my interest. Everything hinges on the personality. You can accept and love the flaws of a beautiful personality. You can work hard for a beautiful personality and you can work through things with a beautiful personality. And you know you cant buy that, or wear that or have plastic surgery for that. You cant put a price on those kind of qualities in a relationship.
  • IamSheaMc
    IamSheaMc Posts: 1,273 Member
    I am already a nice person so now I just need the outside to match. :blushing:
  • Mustang_Susie
    Mustang_Susie Posts: 7,045 Member
    It's hard to fight evolution! Humans are designed to be attracted to the biggest, the prettiest etc. It's in our nature. That being said, inner beauty plays a lot into how long we decide to hang around. I find confidence (not arrogance) to be a great aphrodisiac. If you can make me laugh so hard I weep. We're going to be friends :wink:

    True about our human nature.
    I also believe that inner beauty radiates outward and can make a person incredibly attactive.

    A guy can be tall, dark and handsome but it he's a knob, forget it!
    I'm sure guys could say the same about beautiful women who are big "Bs"...
  • Mustang_Susie
    Mustang_Susie Posts: 7,045 Member
    Definitely my character. I go out of my way to treat people how I wish to be treated, never judge a book by it's cover and will make time and help anyone. Really thats what I care about in life. Having a positive influence on those around me is important, as I get those qualities back from friends and family. That is what makes me feel good and keeps me going, I think thats the substance of life.

    My health is so much more important to me than how I look. I'm a little self conscious but I think most people are. Health is the thing for me tho, the more healthy the greater I feel, and thats what I tend to show anyone from strangers to people I'm close to on a daily basis. I care a lot about making the effort, the better I feel the more effort I make. :)

    In another person, say a potential girlfriend. If I don't know you but there is 1 thing I find attractive about you - that is enough for me to explore my interest. Everything hinges on the personality. You can accept and love the flaws of a beautiful personality. You can work hard for a beautiful personality and you can work through things with a beautiful personality. And you know you cant buy that, or wear that or have plastic surgery for that. You cant put a price on those kind of qualities in a relationship.

    You're going to make a great husband someday :flowerforyou:
  • slkehl
    slkehl Posts: 3,801 Member
    Inner beauty. I feel like if I had a better character, I wouldn't care so much about outward appearances. And I wouldn't be interested in guys who put a priority on that. Plus, looks fade with age anyway.
  • Mustang_Susie
    Mustang_Susie Posts: 7,045 Member
    Inner beauty. I feel like if I had a better character, I wouldn't care so much about outward appearances. And I wouldn't be interested in guys who put a priority on that. Plus, looks fade with age anyway.

    Agree. Good insight :smile:
  • Character is 100% the most important. This is what will carry you thru life. Beauty if fading and anyone who only likes you for that can suck it.

    Sometimes the most beautiful people are the most disgusting human beings. I would take someone with character over a ripped body all day every day.
  • Mustang_Susie
    Mustang_Susie Posts: 7,045 Member
    Character is 100% the most important. This is what will carry you thru life. Beauty if fading and anyone who only likes you for that can suck it.

    Sometimes the most beautiful people are the most disgusting human beings. I would take someone with character over a ripped body all day every day.


    :bigsmile:
  • taunto
    taunto Posts: 6,420 Member
    You become friends with somebody who's inner beauty you appreciate
    You lust after somebody who's outward appearances you like
    You love somebody who you appreciate inside and out.
  • meredith1123
    meredith1123 Posts: 843 Member
    It depends on my day! haha...

    It all boils down to first physical impression and attraction but sometimes you run across someone who isnt all that physically attractive but super smart, funny, charismatic, attentive, sweet and loyal who can become super attractive as time passes.
    It's all in the eye of the beholder.
  • You become friends with somebody who's inner beauty you appreciate
    You lust after somebody who's outward appearances you like
    You love somebody who you appreciate inside and out.


    COULDNT HAVE SAID IT BETTER MYSELF! SOOOO GOING ON FACEBOOK. LMAO:drinker:
  • Mustang_Susie
    Mustang_Susie Posts: 7,045 Member
    It depends on my day! haha...

    It all boils down to first physical impression and attraction but sometimes you run across someone who isnt all that physically attractive but super smart, funny, charismatic, attentive, sweet and loyal who can become super attractive as time passes.
    It's all in the eye of the beholder.

    Nice :smile:
  • Mustang_Susie
    Mustang_Susie Posts: 7,045 Member
    You become friends with somebody who's inner beauty you appreciate
    You lust after somebody who's outward appearances you like
    You love somebody who you appreciate inside and out.

    So true :smile:
  • vikkistarr89
    vikkistarr89 Posts: 122 Member
    My appearance is major right now because i am outwardly confident and a bit extrovert and happy with my character but i despise how i look.

    With partners, you can have one without the other, you need to be physically attracted to them but they should be slightly deeper than a muddy puddle at least
  • InnerConflict
    InnerConflict Posts: 1,592 Member
    I know I am a bit shallow, but I only like the brown M&Ms.

    brown_mm_10703016.jpg
  • Mustang_Susie
    Mustang_Susie Posts: 7,045 Member
    My appearance is major right now because i am outwardly confident and a bit extrovert and happy with my character but i despise how i look.

    With partners, you can have one without the other, you need to be physically attracted to them but they should be slightly deeper than a muddy puddle at least

    Ha! :laugh:
  • spirytwynd
    spirytwynd Posts: 141 Member
    What is on the inside is way more important that what is on the outside. That said, I want the outside to reflect the excellence, dedication and commitment I have on the inside. Hmmmm, call it an application of discipline. :-)
  • silvergurl518
    silvergurl518 Posts: 4,123 Member
    You become friends with somebody who's inner beauty you appreciate
    You lust after somebody who's outward appearances you like
    You love somebody who you appreciate inside and out.

    aw, taunto. you surprise me sometimes :)

    inner beauty radiates. building up my self-esteem and focusing on who i am, not what i look like, is ultimately most important to me. however, self-esteem has a lot to do with how one feels about her/his EVERYTHING, including looks. i am working on becoming the best me i can be: strong, fit, healthy, and beautiful.

    i look for character/personality/"soul" in someone else...but i won't lie to you, looks matter (although everyone's version of attractive is different, thank god--or we'd all be competing for the same person). love this question. makes you think.
  • Pookylou
    Pookylou Posts: 988 Member
    What's more important to you?
    How you look or your character?

    What's more important to you in another person?

    I would like to say that I'm more concerned about my character than my looks but I cannot tell a lie.

    I do notice how other people look, but I know it's their character that will determine the depth of relationship I can/will have with them.

    So, knowing that about myself, I would assume it would be the same for others.

    I need to be beautiful on the inside :smile:

    Very interesting question, currently I would have to say my looks - I have gotten to a point where I am very happy/comfortable with myself internally (though there are of course things I could work on!!) I am trying to focus on my body and making it better. Both through exercise and caring for it. For the first time I care about my hair and make up - 'cause I like my body for once :laugh:

    For my relationships - character, obvs you have to have that initial attraction, but it is the character that keeps you going through the years after the beauty has faded!
  • spirytwynd
    spirytwynd Posts: 141 Member
    I will add that I am still working on the inside as well. I am a work in progress. As Granddad used to say, "When you stop growing (or learning), you start dying."
  • tinak33
    tinak33 Posts: 9,883 Member
    You become friends with somebody who's inner beauty you appreciate
    You lust after somebody who's outward appearances you like
    You love somebody who you appreciate inside and out.

    aw, taunto. you surprise me sometimes :)

    inner beauty radiates. building up my self-esteem and focusing on who i am, not what i look like, is ultimately most important to me. however, self-esteem has a lot to do with how one feels about her/his EVERYTHING, including looks. i am working on becoming the best me i can be: strong, fit, healthy, and beautiful.

    i look for character/personality/"soul" in someone else...but i won't lie to you, looks matter (although everyone's version of attractive is different, thank god--or we'd all be competing for the same person). love this question. makes you think.


    ^^^ All that. :drinker:

    For my self, I am pretty happy with who I am, but I know I can improve on my health and appearance. So I am working on that. And the more I work on my appearance and health, the better I feel about myself and the more I build up my character. It's like a win win all around! :bigsmile: