I don't want washboard abs.....

a bikini body, or to be perfect. There's nothing wrong with those goals if that's your goal, but
I see so many threads asking for comparisons for what they will look like at a certain size, height,
magic number. so many threads asking what's your starting weight, goal weight, and so on.
why does that matter? it doesn't. it might help a few people, but really what matters isn't the scale
or what size jeans you're wearing at 'goal weight' or now. where are all the ladies, and men, if they
want to join in, who don't expect a perfect body? where are all the people that are more concerned with
living life, being healthy, building muscles, attacking their fitness and other goals head on?

when the threads asking for goal weights for people my height, 5'4 ish, not very many people step out on
a limb and say, you know what for my body type 150 just doesn't work for me. I'm not going by some
list of deceased people a hundred years ago to decide what is a 'healthy' weight for me.
because when you have more than average muscle, it's almost useless.
even shooting for a goal of a certain bf% is almost useless, i have seen almost no
pictures of women who look like I do, at my calculated BF%.
a picture of someone else, with a similar body type to mine with as much muscle
as me, i'm not trying to brag here, i'm being realistic. they just don't exist
unless i decide to be very lean. but that's not what i'm expecting.

i'm happy with any small amount of definition i can see
in my calves or wherever. I'm not starving myself to get there.
I'm expecting strength. confidence, to feel more comfortable in my skin.
I'm not hating on a certain body part, finding out how to make it smaller,
i'm learning to love my body as it is, and make it the best I can.

so i'm calling all of you mfp's to tell us
what do you want?
What is important to you?
«1

Replies

  • chellebublz
    chellebublz Posts: 568 Member
    I'm getting married in June 2014, so my goal is just to be happy in my own skin, be able to look back on my wedding photos years later with my kids or grandkids and be proud of who i was, not disappointed. idk if that is going to happen at 120 lbs, 150 lbs or what. when ppl ask me what weight, i say 145 because that's where i was happy at before my first child was born. not because of a BMI, bf %, healthy weight etc. just bc of personal experience.
  • Forensic
    Forensic Posts: 468 Member
    I want my arms not to jiggle when I wear sleeveless tops.

    That's really all I want. :)
  • squatsandlipgloss
    squatsandlipgloss Posts: 595 Member
    Love this, my friend!!! I so agree. I don't necessarily have a goal weight. I started with one, a weight I was at when I was last happy in my skin (eating healthy and working out), but now that I'm losing, getting fitter, healthier and stronger, I notice that I'm happy with my body sooner than I'd expected. I'm 55 lbs from goal and I am already feeling 10x better than in the start. Who knows what weight ill land at. I don't really care to be honest, I'm focusing on today. What I do today, makes today a better day. I don't know or care about what I'm gonna look like next month. If having a donut today will make me feel good, I'll have one, I don't care what effect it'll have on my weight tomorrow. I haven't weighed myself in over a week, I recommend this to the 60% on here that are addicted to the scale!

    Of course there's certain times I see a woman that I think is super sexy, but they are usually plus-size and its not a dream body because its very attainable for me. I won't ever want to be skinny, that's not going to make me happy. I want to feel confident, sexy and fit! And BE healthy and this has nothing to do with what you look like!
  • NaomiJFoster
    NaomiJFoster Posts: 1,450 Member
    Both of my parents have heart disease. Neither of them has ever smoked, neither was ever obese (my dad was chubby when he was a younger man, but not dangerously so). I already have slightly high blood pressure. I want to get to a healthier weight to see if I can lower my blood pressure and to do whatever I can do to keep myself heart-healthy.

    I can already feel, at almost 45 years old, that I'm starting to lose some of my flexibility. I have joint problems as it is, flexibility is very important. I don't want to lose that, I want to regain what I had.

    Plus, yes, I want to look good. Not great. I don't have any aspiration to look like a swimsuit model or anything like that. I just want to be able to walk around and not feel like I should be sucking in my gut.
  • I don't want them either. I don't have the time nor the desire to maintain the level of fitness that washboard abs call for. Now, I don't see anything wrong with folks that want that and have the time to maintain it, but I prefer setting a more realistic goal. At 5'4, the BMI charts so my high weight should be 145. Bwahahahaha.....I'd have to exercise 2 or 3 hours a day for that to be anywhere near maintainable and unless they put treadmill desks in at the office, that isn't happening. Seriously, I don't have a goal weight. I'm down 9 lbs since February 22 and I view that as a minor miracle. I'd love to see the 190s again in the next month or two. To get into the 180s would be an absolute dream. Other than that, I have no weight loss goals.
  • lovechattys
    lovechattys Posts: 65 Member
    I agree! I want to get healthier. I want to be off my BP meds. I want to feel sexy! I am already starting to feel better about my curves. My ultimate goals are get off meds and not hate to have my picture taken. I was never a swimsuit model even at a 114lbs. Numbers are not going to make me happy! Just let me love the skin I'm in!
  • Viva81Diva
    Viva81Diva Posts: 148
    I want to be healthy most definitely! That is why I have been researching fitness and nutrition since age 2000, buy whole foods and organic more so than processed and junk, and why I exercise with intent to burn between 500 - 1000 calories most days of the week.

    I also want to focus on weight. I am overweight right now, after having a baby 2 years ago and struggling with my weight since 2002 after a near-death accident. I am not happy at the weight I am at because I have too much body fat. Even if I didn't try to lose and just toned up, I would still like to lose weight because I weigh too much for my structure. I am small/medium framed, and have always looked healthy between 124 - 140 lbs.

    I want to build strength and endurance, so I may enjoy sports/activities in the future that I have always wanted to participate in.

    I want to be a role model for my son and teach him how to take care of his body and health.

    I want to be attractive upon a first impression, not only to date again when I decide to, but to intrigue potential bosses when I begin my career. In the field I want to work in, it is important that a person is healthy because it is imperative to being a role model for others who want to lose weight and become healthy. How do I educate others if I do not take care of myself?? I may have the knowledge to provide and willingness to learn what I don't know, but if I don't look the part then people will not take me seriously.

    Unfortunately there are many people in this world that judge appearance. I have enough confidence to worry about myself rather than what others think, but at the same time my future depends on what certain people think, and that is my child, future relationship, and future employer.
  • Justjamie0418
    Justjamie0418 Posts: 1,065 Member
    Actually,
    I really AM doing most of my fitness/weightloss for vanity. I am sick and tired of being the fat girl. I want to walk around naked and be attractive, not scary. I want big muscles that will scare all the weak men away! I want my kids to be proud to call me mom. I want to flaunt myself for once in my life and feel like the boss I am!
  • ptaradactyl88
    ptaradactyl88 Posts: 42 Member
    Awesome post my friend.
    I want to walk up 4 flights of stairs and not be gasping for air.
    I want to run a block without struggling to breathe.
    I want to pull up my own body weight.
    I want to stand on my head and my hands.
    I want to put things in my mouth that nourish me, not hinder me.
    I want to learn to live. REALLY LIVE.
    My goal weight is set at 140 lbs because science says that is the high end of healthy for someone my height.
    I will decide when I get there what to do next.
  • KarenJanine
    KarenJanine Posts: 3,497 Member
    Great post. I have to say if I woke up with washboard abs I wouldn't be complaining. I've always erred on the chubby side, not overweight but definitely overfat. I spent my entire adult life up until last year (between the ages of 16 and 29) yo-yo dieting, getting down to a weight I liked then watching the lbs go back on. I never want to have to diet and starve myself again. I want to look good for my years. I want to enjoy food without guilt and not be a slave to the scale.

    After nearly a year of doing things differently I've conquered several of these things. I plan to keep eating well and keep lifting. If my body becomes awesome in the process then that's all for the better :smile:
  • michellekicks
    michellekicks Posts: 3,624 Member
    I want to look good running in swimwear. :laugh:
  • prium01
    prium01 Posts: 306 Member
    I want my arms not to jiggle when I wear sleeveless tops.

    That's really all I want. :)

    This! Be comfortable in shorts or hot pants....I want flat abs but without much definition...
  • ninerbuff
    ninerbuff Posts: 48,990 Member
    Don't want washboard abs? Then keep your body fat at 20% or slightly above.

    A.C.E. Certified Personal/Group FitnessTrainer
    IDEA Fitness member
    Kickboxing Certified Instructor
    Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
  • Rbacchiega
    Rbacchiega Posts: 52 Member
    I want the only parts that really jiggle when I run on the beach to be my...uh...girls. And to feel more comfortable in a rashguard shirt when I surf. That's about it. I've come to terms with never being what magazines say are attractive. I've got a man who loves me the way I am...now it's time for me to love me too.
  • GiGiBeans
    GiGiBeans Posts: 1,062 Member
    I want to run so fast I can catch the Gingerbread Man and then eat him.
  • wahelga
    wahelga Posts: 304 Member
    I want to be an old lady in excellent health - no cancer, no diabetes, no mobility problems. I want to enjoy my grandkids and great-grandkids. I want to travel into my late 80s or 90s - and no, its not too much to hope for, my granny put herself on a plane at age 87 and flew from Australia to Canada to visit her brother.

    I was on track for a long life hampered by ill health ... but now I am turning that around.

    :happy:
  • TheYoungys
    TheYoungys Posts: 44 Member
    I want to feel good when I run with very little jiggling. I want to feel good in my clothes. I want to see the look of appreciation in my husband's eyes when I come to bed. I want my washboard stomach back because it suits me. Finally, I want to feel light and strong and healthy and set a good example for my child. That pretty much sums up why I am on MFP and why I work so hard. :-)
  • BeachIron
    BeachIron Posts: 6,490 Member
    When I started I just wanted to be able to walk up a hill without getting winded. I had, by my mid-30s, let myself get to the point where I was dangerously close to my father's size and knowing his health problems it scared the hell out of me.

    So I joined a gym and asked the really fit people around me what they were doing. I kept at it, started with the elliptical, messed around with weight lifting, and finally learned to run for the first time in my life (I'm asthmatic).

    Then the weight started to slowly come off, and the muscles finally started to grow just a little a bit. And you know what happened? My goals changed. I still don't have washboard abs. I will though.

    For the first time in my life, I feel great and am proud of the way I look. You absolutely have the right mind set, but push yourself and allow your goals to change with time, and you may just surprise yourself.
  • myofibril
    myofibril Posts: 4,500 Member
    There is a history of heart disease and diabetes in my family.

    I don't want to be just another statistic.

    I want to live a long, happy and healthy life and be mentally, spiritually and physically strong. Anything else is a bonus ;)
  • Its_Nat
    Its_Nat Posts: 184 Member
    Haha love it! I sure as hell don't want washboard abs (way too much hard work to keep them, let alone GET them),I just want to feel comfy in my own skin. I could stop where I am now, and be reasonably content. But I know for a fact another 5 kilos or so will take me back to the shape/weight I was always most comfortable at.

    I tend not to stress over it, this is my lifestyle, and I make sure I enjoy it. For ME that doesn't mean hours and hours of exercise, simply because I'm lazy lol. For others though - they LOVE exercise, and that works for them! It doesn't really bother me if it takes another year to get to where I want to be shape wise (but if it does, I'll wonder why the hell I'm being so lazy lol), I'm simply happy to know that I WILL get there.
  • ILiftHeavyAcrylics
    ILiftHeavyAcrylics Posts: 27,732 Member
    When I started I just wanted to be able to walk up a hill without getting winded. I had, by my mid-30s, let myself get to the point where I was dangerously close to my father's size and knowing his health problems it scared the hell out of me.

    So I joined a gym and asked the really fit people around me what they were doing. I kept at it, started with the elliptical, messed around with weight lifting, and finally learned to run for the first time in my life (I'm asthmatic).

    Then the weight started to slowly come off, and the muscles finally started to grow just a little a bit. And you know what happened? My goals changed. I still don't have washboard abs. I will though.

    For the first time in my life, I feel great and am proud of the way I look. You absolutely have the right mind set, but push yourself and allow your goals to change with time, and you may just surprise yourself.

    This is true for me too. It started as me wanting to make my body as healthy as possible despite a couple of chronic illnesses. Then I just wanted to look good in a bikini. Now I want to be strong. Goals change over time and there's nothing wrong with that.
  • SGSmallman
    SGSmallman Posts: 193 Member
    I started at a weight loss target but as I get stronger and leaner I've realised sod the weight number I want to be better than before, I want to be cut and feel confident. it's already starting to show as people are treating me differently (in a good way)

    If I was to up my weight again so what, IF its lean muscle. The only thing i care about lowering is the inches around my waist and my total body fat %

    To me being ripped and toned shows people I respect my body and care for myself so they should respect me. It's probably wrong to think like that but it's whats helping me through the journey.

    I just want to be the best me I can be.
  • Fozzi43
    Fozzi43 Posts: 2,984 Member
    I want to look good naked.
  • When I started I just wanted to be able to walk up a hill without getting winded. I had, by my mid-30s, let myself get to the point where I was dangerously close to my father's size and knowing his health problems it scared the hell out of me.

    So I joined a gym and asked the really fit people around me what they were doing. I kept at it, started with the elliptical, messed around with weight lifting, and finally learned to run for the first time in my life (I'm asthmatic).

    Then the weight started to slowly come off, and the muscles finally started to grow just a little a bit. And you know what happened? My goals changed. I still don't have washboard abs. I will though.

    For the first time in my life, I feel great and am proud of the way I look. You absolutely have the right mind set, but push yourself and allow your goals to change with time, and you may just surprise yourself.

    This.
  • delonda1
    delonda1 Posts: 525 Member
    To be honest I'm pretty content with how I look. I want to drop my BF about 5% to be around the 16-17 mark and more defined quad muscles and smaller stomach...

    i just want to feel comfortable. i feel like all of my friends are beautiful and i feel like the runt in the group which prob isnt true buttt its how i feel so i dont want to feel like that
  • mazdauk
    mazdauk Posts: 1,380 Member
    I've set my target at 147 because I think that is achievable at my age without making a rod for my own back with regards to maintaining. That puts me in the "healthy" weight bracket for my height -but still scarily close to overwith, which is why i don't look at those stupid charts :laugh:

    I want to tie my shoelaces without feeling pregnant (got that one ticked now:happy: ), fit in to nice clothes and be active and mobile when I'm a grandma (hopefully a fair few years yet!!:huh: )
  • katy_trail
    katy_trail Posts: 1,992 Member
    When I started I just wanted to be able to walk up a hill without getting winded. I had, by my mid-30s, let myself get to the point where I was dangerously close to my father's size and knowing his health problems it scared the hell out of me.

    So I joined a gym and asked the really fit people around me what they were doing. I kept at it, started with the elliptical, messed around with weight lifting, and finally learned to run for the first time in my life (I'm asthmatic).

    Then the weight started to slowly come off, and the muscles finally started to grow just a little a bit. And you know what happened? My goals changed. I still don't have washboard abs. I will though.

    For the first time in my life, I feel great and am proud of the way I look. You absolutely have the right mind set, but push yourself and allow your goals to change with time, and you may just surprise yourself.

    absolutely! and at least for now i'll take an azz like a diamond over abs though :laugh: :love:
  • katy_trail
    katy_trail Posts: 1,992 Member
    yeah, i'm really trying not to limit myself. my fitness levels have been improving and i'm losing inches, and feeling like i'm making such progress for such a short period of time. My point was, that we can get so caught up in the scale or other numbers, when we should be focusing on improving our fitness, nutrition, and at least in the short term, make sure the goals we have are realistic.
    it might take me a year to see actual definition in my quads. or another month working like this. but when it happens, it will be the first time I've had any, even with all the long distance running i used to do, years ago. But now I'm finally challenging my body, and
    you are all exactly right don't limit yourself , and change your goals as you go.
  • JulieAnn1109
    JulieAnn1109 Posts: 21 Member
    Awesome post my friend.
    I want to walk up 4 flights of stairs and not be gasping for air.
    I want to run a block without struggling to breathe.
    I want to pull up my own body weight.
    I want to stand on my head and my hands.
    I want to put things in my mouth that nourish me, not hinder me.
    I want to learn to live. REALLY LIVE.
    My goal weight is set at 140 lbs because science says that is the high end of healthy for someone my height.
    I will decide when I get there what to do next.


    AWESOME:)
  • alpine1994
    alpine1994 Posts: 1,915 Member
    I think I would have agreed with you at the beginning, but my goals have been evolving through the whole weight loss process. At this point, I am just under my goal weight and I've taken an interest in weight lifting and I actually do want washboard abs, a bikini body, etc. Maybe now that I see it's attainable, it's something I want to push for. I think it's fun and rewarding to continue to challenge myself to do what I always thought was impossible.