Three Month Plateau frustrated and seeking help!

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alright changing the way I look at food...this plateau I have been on... I am going to be very honest and say I have been indulging in BLTS ( bites, licks, and tastes) I am good all day till when I am making dinner, or even after dinner just before bed. I know the BLTS add up! another reason why Im not losing is because my portion control isn't really in control either. ( I need to buy some new measuring cups and spoons! Also another reason why is because of sugar. I am PMS'in and that is so hard for me!! Something has got to give! I only have 30 more lbs to lose!!! I was losing before and doing great!! I ate whatever I wanted ( strict portion control) and now that isn't working! I upped my calories a month ago to my BMR/ TDEE 20% and have actually gained like five to six lbs!!!! what should I do? any suggestions? advice? If you look at my journal you will see I have eaten very crappy lately.. the reason? I am on the verge of giving up!

I set my setting to seditary ( college student) and between classes I fast walk and fidgit, and am pretty active at home with the babies and cooking, cleaning, etc. I am going to start lifting weights with dumbbells again ( between 5lbs to 25lbs).

anyway, I just hate the fact that the first thirty came off so easy now nothing wants to budge... I know I am my worst own enemy. I also know that if I deny myself something I will binge.. I am a recovering emotional eater/binge eater.

Please help me I don't want to give up!!!
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  • curvymomo3
    curvymomo3 Posts: 253 Member
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    bump?
  • ellaloveslove
    ellaloveslove Posts: 166 Member
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    I'm not an expert so I can't really give you any advice except for please don't give up! I've read of people being stuck on the same weight for anyway from a month to six months, sometimes (although incredibly frustrating!) it happens. Keep your diet on track, keep exercising, and keep your head up! Are you doing any strength training? If the scale isn't moving you could try incorporating more strength training to tone things up.

    Also, I know that sometimes when you switch to TDEE-20% it can take a while for things to even out, since your body is used to eating more calories. Give it another two weeks and reevaluate! If you are walking and working out you may need to change your settings from sedentary to lightly active.

    Don't give up! You're doing good :flowerforyou:
  • TigressPat
    TigressPat Posts: 722
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    umm... I don't know your height and weight, so i could be wrong, but you eat a LOT.

    i went through 3 weeks of your diary and you averaged 2300-2400 calories a day

    again, I don't know your specifics, but that is a lot for the average sized women unless you lift heavy, and run 10 miles a day.

    also, more than 60% of those calories and often 80-90% of those calories came from fast food and chain restaurants.
    you removed the soidum tracker from your diary, but Im guessing your sodium is through the roof.

    even without the high cal diet, the sodium is enough to keep you from losing.

    I personally would gain quite a lot of weight eating what you eat, so I have to say you are lucky you are maintaining!

    good luck !
  • TigressPat
    TigressPat Posts: 722
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    PS did you up your cals to TDEE -20% and are ALSO eating back your exercise calories (which seem super inflated?)
  • elyelyse
    elyelyse Posts: 1,454 Member
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    I have to agree that unless you are very tall and very active, your calories seem set more for maintenance than loss. Also, be careful with MFPs exercise burn estimates, they are known to well above a realistic burn.
    If, on top of what you are logging you are also indulging in lots of little tastes that's just going to add to the problem, but I think the underlying problem is that your daily goal is not right for you.
  • SairahRose
    SairahRose Posts: 412 Member
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    If you eat at BMR, you should eat your exercise cals back.
    If you eat TDEE -20%, then you don't need to.


    It does take a good few months for your body to ease up, and you're definitely not sedentary if you do all that stuff - even mine's set to lightly active, and I'm a stay home mum (I eat between 1800 and 2500 - but I know I weigh a lot more than you)
    Looking at your diary, all that seems totally fine to me though, so I wouldn't change much.

    If it's possible, eat less sodium filled foods. Try cooking yourself without salt, or choosing the lower options when going for fast food. And then drink loads of water - it could be a lot of water weight.
  • Ed98043
    Ed98043 Posts: 1,333 Member
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    You're definitely eating a lot of calories, and even though your initial post mentions no formal exercise (just fidgeting, walking between classes, house cleaning and child rearing) you usually have pretty high exercise calories added every day and it appears that you're eating them back for the most part.

    I think you should switch your setting from sedentary to lightly active, 1 lb a week loss, stop adding in calories for normal daily activities (but add them when you do actual workouts) and then be very careful with your measuring and weighing so you know you're eating the right amount to create a deficit. I'd gain weight if I was eating as much as you, too. My daily calories are usually between 1400 and 1600 and the weight loss is still very slow.
  • RawCarrots
    RawCarrots Posts: 204 Member
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    I'm not an expert (yet! :-)) but a lot of your exercise calories are from food preparation and cleaning (which I admire btw, I'd barely manage 2h cleaning a week let alone daily). Did you use to eat those calories back before, could eating them back now be the cause you stalled?
  • samcat2000
    samcat2000 Posts: 106 Member
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    I'm newer on MFP so keep that in mind :-). I hope you don't give up. Losing 30 lbs is a huge accomplishment - be proud! The fact that you're acknowledging you're on a plateau is proof you're still in this game.

    I'm still tweaking my diet and trying to figure things out myself but just skimming some of your days, I'm noticing you're not eating a lot of fruit or veggies. Can you work more homemade fresh salads with lower calorie dressings and fruit into your daily routine diet? Also, can you eat "in" more so you can have a little more control over what you're eating? I know this can be dependent on where you live, what's in the store, and of course how much time you have to do food prep. Since I started MFP in January, I cut down on eating out and I really upped my fruit and salad intake. It has taken quite a bit of time and prep but I'm getting much more efficient after 3 months. Now, at night when I'm cooking dinner for my son, I prepare a big fruit plate of ripe pears, mango, kiwi, and strawberries and snack on this with him until our dinner is ready. That way I'm not dipping into the cheese stash, chips, etc.I also eat at least one piece of fruit as part of my morning snack which seems to stave off my HUGE sweet tooth. What's shocked me lately is that I'm craving fruit over some of the other sugary things I would have eaten in the past. I still eat sweets but it's balanced with much more fruit now. I do count all fruit calories. Personally, totally cutting sugar out would never work for me.

    Finally, maybe your plateau is tied to your workout regime too...have you changed it up in a while?

    Good luck and hang in there!
  • FATJAKE5
    FATJAKE5 Posts: 162
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    "... I am going to be very honest and say I have been indulging in BLTS ( bites, licks, and tastes) I am good all day till when I am making dinner, or even after dinner just before bed. I know the BLTS add up! another reason why Im not losing is because my portion control isn't really in control either. ( I need to buy some new measuring cups and spoons! Also another reason why is because of sugar. I am PMS'in and that is so hard for me!! Something has got to give!"

    These are your words. You know what you are doing that is defeating yourself. Somehow you need to re-focus and find the determination to do what you know works. I put a gram/ounce scale right on the table next to a note book and weigh then log every bite. You are right,.....they really do add up. That helps to deter my grazing as I call it.
    The reason I had losing weight before was sodium. When I got started on MFP and saw how much sodium was in processed food, I knew what to eliminate. We load up on steamed or boiled fresh vegetables especially at supper. I am still working on the sugar. When you stop and log your BLTS it may help you stop the habit. It is a life long battle with yourself where winning is being around to fight longer. Stay the course.
  • curvymomo3
    curvymomo3 Posts: 253 Member
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    very eye opening insight thank you for your responses.. also to remind you I have already given up.. that is why my calories look like hell :( I walk ALOT and its pretty sporadic really an hour hear two hours there it depends when I can squeeze it in. I just started strength training today and want to start riding my bike as well. I do eat my exercise cals. I am 52 and weigh 189lbs. I do know that I am not clean in my eating, I am pretty depressed to be transparent with you all.

    my mother has cancer, my house is a wreck, final week is coming soon and the class assignments are piling on. I could go on but I wont.
  • elyelyse
    elyelyse Posts: 1,454 Member
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    very eye opening insight thank you for your responses.. also to remind you I have already given up.. that is why my calories look like hell :( I walk ALOT and its pretty sporadic really an hour hear two hours there it depends when I can squeeze it in. I just started strength training today and want to start riding my bike as well. I do eat my exercise cals. I am 52 and weigh 189lbs. I do know that I am not clean in my eating, I am pretty depressed to be transparent with you all.

    my mother has cancer, my house is a wreck, final week is coming soon and the class assignments are piling on. I could go on but I wont.

    I don't know how long its been since you threw your hands up and kinda gave up but, i went back a month and a half in your diary and you were still regularly blowing past 2000 calories a day often. Maybe you gave up before that, and it's just taken you a while to come back and say ok, im ready to deal with this. Be proud of yourself for venting your frustrations and asking for help, instead of just walking away from it.

    I think lots of people use the word "plateau" when they really mean "i haven't had my act together". A true plateau is when you are doing everything "right" and still don't see progress. I can pretend I've been fighting a plateau for about a month but really, I just got a tiny bit lazy with my logging and also needed to step up my activity a little. I resumed logging everything, and added a few minutes of running to my hikes and bam, broke through and got past these same 2 pounds ive been fighting with for weeks.

    If you want some help getting back on track, I'd be happy to help you figure out what you should be doing. I'm no authority, but I'm doing pretty well so far!

    I know you have a lot of personal issues making it difficult, but look at it this way... this is the one thing you can do for yourself that will absolutely, no doubt about it, improve your quality of life if you buckle down and do it right. It might take effort you don't think you have the energy for, but the return on your investment is almost guaranteed.
  • curvymomo3
    curvymomo3 Posts: 253 Member
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    your absolutely right. I have been in a state of denail. After my husbands mother passed away back in October ( came to a shock to us really and then the financial burden on top of that) I haven't been the same.. I haven't logged/measured/exercised the same.. Even before that I still have never been a 'perfect eater ' but I am trying. I can't lie to myself anymore, that is what got me to be 215lbs in the first place :( I know I am better I am stronger than this and this is the only thing in my life right now that I can control, you are right. I can't keep hiding my pain with food and then lying about it. This is not working. I need to STOP allowing my emotions to rule me and find my fight again. I want to have success and the first step is admitting I HAVE A PROBLEM. I do have a problem a huge problem.. I need help :(
    very eye opening insight thank you for your responses.. also to remind you I have already given up.. that is why my calories look like hell :( I walk ALOT and its pretty sporadic really an hour hear two hours there it depends when I can squeeze it in. I just started strength training today and want to start riding my bike as well. I do eat my exercise cals. I am 52 and weigh 189lbs. I do know that I am not clean in my eating, I am pretty depressed to be transparent with you all.

    my mother has cancer, my house is a wreck, final week is coming soon and the class assignments are piling on. I could go on but I wont.

    I don't know how long its been since you threw your hands up and kinda gave up but, i went back a month and a half in your diary and you were still regularly blowing past 2000 calories a day often. Maybe you gave up before that, and it's just taken you a while to come back and say ok, im ready to deal with this. Be proud of yourself for venting your frustrations and asking for help, instead of just walking away from it.

    I think lots of people use the word "plateau" when they really mean "i haven't had my act together". A true plateau is when you are doing everything "right" and still don't see progress. I can pretend I've been fighting a plateau for about a month but really, I just got a tiny bit lazy with my logging and also needed to step up my activity a little. I resumed logging everything, and added a few minutes of running to my hikes and bam, broke through and got past these same 2 pounds ive been fighting with for weeks.

    If you want some help getting back on track, I'd be happy to help you figure out what you should be doing. I'm no authority, but I'm doing pretty well so far!

    I know you have a lot of personal issues making it difficult, but look at it this way... this is the one thing you can do for yourself that will absolutely, no doubt about it, improve your quality of life if you buckle down and do it right. It might take effort you don't think you have the energy for, but the return on your investment is almost guaranteed.
  • elyelyse
    elyelyse Posts: 1,454 Member
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    . Even before that I still have never been a 'perfect eater ' but I am trying.

    well here's some good news... you don't have to be a perfect eater!

    I get the sense that you are really overwhelmed, and that can be a big hindrance to weight loss. Maybe instead of looking at the whole picture at once, pick one thing to focus on at a time. Maybe this week, focus on cutting out some of the more processed salty stuff. Once you have that under control a little, decide to add more fresh veggies. After that, start to get more disciplined with portion control. A single-focus change might be a lot easier, and will also give you some confidence when you find you are able to be successful at the smaller things. You don't have to go right from denial to perfect. (heck, you never have to get to perfect at all!)
  • Ed98043
    Ed98043 Posts: 1,333 Member
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    ...I was losing before and doing great!! I ate whatever I wanted (strict portion control) and now that isn't working! I upped my calories a month ago to my BMR/ TDEE 20% and have actually gained like five to six lbs!!!! what should I do?

    From your original post it seemed like you were having trouble figuring out what your calories should be set to. As most everyone pointed out, you're eating too much for there to be a deficit based on lifestyle you've described. Counting every little thing you do as exercise (and probably overestimating the burn as well - MFP listings are notorious for that) and then eating back all those calories is where you're going wrong. Maybe think about eating back only half of them, or not counting regular daily activities like cooking and cleaning.

    And as asked before...were you doing anything differently when you lost the 30 lbs?
  • iceman7840
    iceman7840 Posts: 110
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    Unfortunately plateau's go with the territory. No one is immune to them. I consider myself very successful with my journey and I get caught up in them often. The key is to stay motivated and be consistent. As long as you put in the work, you will see the results.
  • curvymomo3
    curvymomo3 Posts: 253 Member
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    ...I was losing before and doing great!! I ate whatever I wanted (strict portion control) and now that isn't working! I upped my calories a month ago to my BMR/ TDEE 20% and have actually gained like five to six lbs!!!! what should I do?

    From your original post it seemed like you were having trouble figuring out what your calories should be set to. As most everyone pointed out, you're eating too much for there to be a deficit based on lifestyle you've described. Counting every little thing you do as exercise (and probably overestimating the burn as well - MFP listings are notorious for that) and then eating back all those calories is where you're going wrong. Maybe think about eating back only half of them, or not counting regular daily activities like cooking and cleaning.

    And as asked before...were you doing anything differently when you lost the 30 lbs?

    the only thing dif that I can think of is I had my thingie set to lose 1lb a month, drank more water, and was not in college, mother in law was still alive, and my mommy didn't have cancer...
  • curvymomo3
    curvymomo3 Posts: 253 Member
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    TDEE- 20% isn't for everyone. That might be too much for you. You should read this link, it explains everything.

    http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/943139-weight-loss-cheat-sheet-ipoarm

    if you have any questions after this, just ask.

    thank you for all the knowledge I really don't know what the crap I am doing lol! this is very helpful actually. according to the website BMR my BMR is 2012 and multiplying that by .80 gave me 1609..
  • curvymomo3
    curvymomo3 Posts: 253 Member
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    OH and amazing job on the loss!!!!!! you are an inspiration to me I like your quote too.. " people ask me how I did it and I told them I didn't quit" I need to do the same!
  • Ed98043
    Ed98043 Posts: 1,333 Member
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    TDEE- 20% isn't for everyone. That might be too much for you. You should read this link, it explains everything.

    http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/943139-weight-loss-cheat-sheet-ipoarm

    if you have any questions after this, just ask.

    thank you for all the knowledge I really don't know what the crap I am doing lol! this is very helpful actually. according to the website BMR my BMR is 2012 and multiplying that by .80 gave me 1609..

    is 2,012 your BMR or TDEE? BMR is the minimal calories that your body uses to just function. TDEE is the full amount of calories that your body uses on average day of activity. For instance, my BMR is 1,580 and my TDEE is 2,070, so TDEE -20% would be 1,656 calories per day.