Dating in your 40's?

Shoppingkay
Shoppingkay Posts: 15
in Chit-Chat
What have your experiences been like dating in your 40's?
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Replies

  • Ready2Rock206
    Ready2Rock206 Posts: 9,487 Member
    Mine have been non-existent. Hopefully someone else has some better motivating experiences!
  • Mustang_Susie
    Mustang_Susie Posts: 7,045 Member
    Thankfully, I haven't had to date for a long time.
    I wouldn't even know where to begin.
    I'm interested to see what people have to say.

    OP: have you been dating?
  • Shoppingkay
    Shoppingkay Posts: 15
    Been divorced 4 1/2 years and had an on/off relationship that is now over. I'm hesitant to try to get back out there. Seems like it's hard to find a nice " normal " guy who isn't completely hung up on dating someone who looks like a barbie doll.
  • marsellient
    marsellient Posts: 591 Member
    Worked for me! Widowed at 40, focused on teenager, met someone at 44, and that was it. Take it slow, don't settle, and be your own person. By the way, cycling and being active was a big part of dating!
  • Mustang_Susie
    Mustang_Susie Posts: 7,045 Member
    Been divorced 4 1/2 years and had an on/off relationship that is now over. I'm hesitant to try to get back out there. Seems like it's hard to find a nice " normal " guy who isn't completely hung up on dating someone who looks like a barbie doll.

    Oh boy...

    I got divorced in my early 30's.
    I never dated after that.
    I was set up on a blind date by a mutual friend.
    Take this as you may, but the night before I met him, I got down on my knees and told God I didn't want to be alone the rest of my life...
  • Shoppingkay
    Shoppingkay Posts: 15
    Susan, I tell God that EVERY day! ; ) I know He will bring someone to me in His time. That's another challenge, finding a man with the same beliefs. The thing is, even my good Christian guy friends want to date 5'8 skinny blondes who are 10 years younger than them! : (
  • Sqeekyjojo
    Sqeekyjojo Posts: 704 Member
    All the awkwardness and embarrassment of being a teenager without the curfew.

    But with the advantage of being too old to give a stuff what anyone else thinks of you.
  • bluebird321
    bluebird321 Posts: 733 Member
    Not fun, but worth it because that is how I met my current wife.
  • Shoppingkay
    Shoppingkay Posts: 15
    I know you're right " Blue ". Glad you found love! : )
  • Mustang_Susie
    Mustang_Susie Posts: 7,045 Member
    Susan, I tell God that EVERY day! ; ) I know He will bring someone to me in His time. That's another challenge, finding a man with the same beliefs. The thing is, even my good Christian guy friends want to date 5'8 skinny blondes who are 10 years younger than them! : (

    Well, I'm sorry but that's just, well... wrong.
    What about your heart?

    ETA: my exact words were: I don't want to be a missionary to Zimbabwe.
    Yeah, real "Christian" of me.
    Funny thing, one of the young, female doctors in our church just left for Zimbabwe... :laugh:
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  • wbgolden
    wbgolden Posts: 2,066 Member
    It's not too bad. You know what you don't want by now. Don't settle for less than who's perfect FOR YOU just because you don't want to be alone.
  • mountaingirl2207
    mountaingirl2207 Posts: 181
    Contemplating the idea.... but really don't want to feel like I'm 17 again. Hated it enough the first time around. I'm trying to just stay focused on my kids and my healthy lifestyle, and hopefully the right relationship will come along... before I'm 90.
  • darrensurrey
    darrensurrey Posts: 3,942 Member
    desert5.jpg
  • lithezebra
    lithezebra Posts: 3,670 Member
    Susan, I tell God that EVERY day! ; ) I know He will bring someone to me in His time. That's another challenge, finding a man with the same beliefs. The thing is, even my good Christian guy friends want to date 5'8 skinny blondes who are 10 years younger than them! : (

    What about your good Christian guy friends who are about 55? Alternatively, less traditional guys are sometimes more open-minded about what they consider desirable in a partner.
  • justlistening
    justlistening Posts: 249 Member
    Yup did that. I got divorced when I was 39. I dated several guys contrary to my teenage/young adult years. I dated younger guys and guys slightly older than me. Not much to say other than don't settle. I joined hiking, volleyball, and other groups just to get out and meet people. Hubs and I met rock climbing and since the second weekend we met we have not been apart. Our 1 year anniversary is coming up. BTW. I was NOT looking to get married in any way, but everything just fit perfectly.
  • Lrdoflamancha
    Lrdoflamancha Posts: 1,280 Member
    Very interesting writer for the local newspaper is exploring this topic right now. The newspaper is the Simi Valley Acorn. The articles have the word "single" in the title. She is trying to find out where are all the men over 40. It might be worth following her and see what she finds. If you wish to know more.... PM me and I will find her name.
  • Mustang_Susie
    Mustang_Susie Posts: 7,045 Member
    Well, it's different than it was. That's for sure. From a guys point of view, 40+ women are so jaded that its ridiculous. The nice ones are probably there somewhere. On the good side, everyone knows what they want and they don't fukc around. So, in a way, it's easier. But, the problem is, I've lost faith in love, so mainly, I just want to bang. I don't care about he relationship BS. most women want to bang too, but want to be respectful of it, and are hopeful that in turns into something more. No change on that front.

    Basically, dating is stupid and it sucks. I quit. I just focus on my kids. Try to bang here and there. Maybe one day, it will all come together. It doesn't matter either way. It's a lot cheaper not having a woman around, so I'm good.

    I've dated a lot. I've come to the conclusion that it's better not to date and just maybe someone will walk in. When you're out looking, you might miss what's right in front of you. Just live and don't worry about it.

    Aw Jerry, I can pretend to not be jaded if you'd like... :wink:
  • Crankstr
    Crankstr Posts: 3,958 Member
    Well, it's different than it was. That's for sure. From a guys point of view, 40+ women are so jaded that its ridiculous. The nice ones are probably there somewhere. On the good side, everyone knows what they want and they don't fukc around. So, in a way, it's easier. But, the problem is, I've lost faith in love, so mainly, I just want to bang. I don't care about he relationship BS. most women want to bang too, but want to be respectful of it, and are hopeful that in turns into something more. No change on that front.

    Basically, dating is stupid and it sucks. I quit. I just focus on my kids. Try to bang here and there. Maybe one day, it will all come together. It doesn't matter either way. It's a lot cheaper not having a woman around, so I'm good.

    I've dated a lot. I've come to the conclusion that it's better not to date and just maybe someone will walk in. When you're out looking, you might miss what's right in front of you. Just live and don't worry about it.

    charming.

    BANGBANGBANG
  • Nightterror218
    Nightterror218 Posts: 375 Member
    cougars lol
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  • SolanumSunrise
    SolanumSunrise Posts: 244 Member
    Worked for me! Widowed at 40, focused on teenager, met someone at 44, and that was it. Take it slow, don't settle, and be your own person. By the way, cycling and being active was a big part of dating!

    That's good for me to hear. I'm 40, divorced for two years, and still have a few years left with teenagers. No time to date now but I'm looking forward to when I will have the opportunity. I just worry I'll be over the hill by 45!
  • Shoppingkay
    Shoppingkay Posts: 15
    My one guy friend who is 58 has a girlfriend who is 44 and my other guy friend is 47 and trolling for 35 year olds. : ( Not that I would date either of them but just saying...
  • Shoppingkay
    Shoppingkay Posts: 15
    I think JERRY is more jaded than the women he is dating!
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  • tikimatt
    tikimatt Posts: 23
    You mean someone will date us ?
  • Crankstr
    Crankstr Posts: 3,958 Member
    You mean someone will date us ?

    According to the other gentleman, BANG

    you know because wanting to be BANGed makes us jaded women swoon
  • Mustang_Susie
    Mustang_Susie Posts: 7,045 Member
    You mean someone will date us ?

    According to the other gentleman, BANG

    you know because wanting to be BANGed makes us jaded women swoon

    No, no, no...
    It's all about the size of his pension...
  • SoDamnHungry
    SoDamnHungry Posts: 6,998 Member
    I'm having trouble at 27. Maybe 40's will be easier?
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