Dating in your 40's?

I'm 56 and have been divorced since I was 31. I haven't dated anyone for more than two dates since the divorce. Raised two children virtually on my own and put myself through college with them in tow. Now have my MSN and am satisfied with work. Would I like someone to be with me into old age? Definitely. The problem is that most men around my age only want sex. It is not that I am not interested in sex, but at my age, I know what I want in a partner and will not settle for less. Two dates does not give me enough time to decide if the person has the characteristics that I want in a partner and I don't spread my legs easily. Too many diseases out there! I get tired of men not wanting to use a condom, too.

Oh, not all women that are divorced and older are jaded. I've put the past behind me and am looking toward the future while living in the present. I realize that both my spouse and I made mistakes. I don't blame anyone and I learned from the experience; especially about who I am and what I am capable of. I do a lot of things by myself or with my friends, so I don't really feel the need to have a partner. I also feel very comfortable going to parties with couples by myself.

Sorry I can't give you any tips on how to get a guy. I haven't been successful at doing that. :ohwell:

You mean someone will date us ?

According to the other gentleman, BANG

you know because wanting to be BANGed makes us jaded women swoon

That's not what makes you jaded.

What makes me jaded? I think men are wonderful.

You said, "wanting to be BANGed makes us jaded women", which put you in the category. I'm sorry if I jumped to that conclusion.

I love women too. I just don't want a relationship. I was simply giving my experience with dating. I'm out now, just raising my kids. I'm quite happy as things are. It would have to be someone super special to enter into my world at this stage.

I'm guessing I'll die alone, at this point. But, nothing is guaranteed.

ahhh...*wishes there was a sarcasm font*

I said, "wanting to be BANGed makes us jaded women swoooooooon" trying to say that it does anything but...I should have left out the word jaded.

Either way it kind of made me cringe.

But hey, if it works for you.

Well, it's different than it was. That's for sure. From a guys point of view, 40+ women are so jaded that its ridiculous. The nice ones are probably there somewhere. On the good side, everyone knows what they want and they don't fukc around. So, in a way, it's easier. But, the problem is, I've lost faith in love, so mainly, I just want to bang. I don't care about he relationship BS. most women want to bang too, but want to be respectful of it, and are hopeful that in turns into something more. No change on that front.

Basically, dating is stupid and it sucks. I quit. I just focus on my kids. Try to bang here and there. Maybe one day, it will all come together. It doesn't matter either way. It's a lot cheaper not having a woman around, so I'm good.

I've dated a lot. I've come to the conclusion that it's better not to date and just maybe someone will walk in. When you're out looking, you might miss what's right in front of you. Just live and don't worry about it.

What have 40+ women done or said that makes you think they are jaded?
I'm not arguing, just curious as to your perspective.
You know me, always picking someone's brain...

I was divorced at 44. did some dating with work colleagues, then through newspaper sites. A couple lasted a while.
Then after a break up I felt really low and had to have a hysterectomy so I didn't date for 31/2 years. Put on weight, then managed to get a bit of it off. Went back on to on line dating and after one false start I met my husband who I have now been happy with for nearly 10 years. I was 53 when I met him and he was 57. We are so happy together. Don't give up hope.
PS I am now lighter than when I met him.

My experience has not been the best. I find that I know what I want and what I can and can't live with in someone and once I see something I can't live with in a person I have no further interest. I'm okay on my own but I miss the companionship of a mate.

I have plenty of friends both male and female and get out and socialize in both one on one and group settings. I was on a volleyball team and I'm active in a divorce/separation group.

Right now I am concentrating on me. I hope that one day I find the right person but for now I'm not out looking for someone.

Dye your hair
jk

You're a lovely lady and some smart, handsome guy will see that

Interesting thread. I am a bit older, 54, but many people guess that I'm in my 40's. I was married 30 years and never cheated. Divorced two years, I have tried online dating twice - two different sites. Injecting a bit of humor here, but there's always a bit of truth in humor, otherwise it wouldn't be funny. Its interesting that women think the only thing I am looking for is a Barbie or sex.

Most women are looking one of several types:

1. Athletic and toned, makes $100,000+, lives within walking distance of the beach for long nightly walks there.

2. Puts the ring on his finger, has a stable, good-paying job, does all the housework and yardwork, must like dogs (or cats), NEVER pesters her for sex.

3. A Cowboy.

I did find one person who I clicked with very well. Unfortunately, her son was living with her, and he had such a personality/attitude difference when she wasn't present that it made staying un-tolerable.

So I know they are out there. Patience. I need to remember patience.

There's a #2?

There's a #2?

I rest my case.:laugh: