I need all the guidance I can get.

emibrus1
emibrus1 Posts: 59
in Introduce Yourself
Hello everyone! My name is Emily {Emy/Em for short} and I'm a full on newbie with it comes to social dieting. I'm not sure what my goal is with MFP - as for whether I'm looking to lose weight vs. toning - but I do know that I can't do this on my own anymore. I need guidance.

From the beginning I was slightly out of shape. At 5'2" I carry my weight surprisingly well...but I'm by no means one of those people who looks 30 pounds less than they actually are. Perhaps that means I have a good base for muscle mass? I was average to chunky through school...as evident by my senior prom photo taken in 2005:
EmyProm_zps296cd74f.jpg

Then enter college where I was bombarded with calorie counting and phobia of "the freshman 15". I became anorexic almost immediately after enrolling. By summer 2006 it was obvious I was sick. I've done permanent damage to my digestive system by having taken 4-5 laxatives daily for 7+ months. Notice my somewhat vacant expression here (for censor and potential trigger reasons I refuse to post more extreme pictures). I lost around 15 pounds even after this photo.
Arm_zps058dcc29.jpg

I recovered (I use that term for no relapses/panic attacks toward weight gain in 6 months) by 2009. Mostly because I discovered I was pregnant...accidentally. My husband and I were surprised. I quit smoking cold turkey the instant I found out. I put my fear of food behind me. I was hell bent on doing everything for the sake of having a healthy child. And I did! But unfortunately I gained an inconceivable amount of weight. I was 220 pounds when I left the hospital @_@
BabyWeight_zps2b572e6f.jpg
BabyWeight2_zps06b393bb.jpg

Since 2010 I've lost 66 pounds where I've gotten stuck. I've been bouncing from 150-155 for the past half a year now. I don't really have a goal weight (or for that matter a goal). But I'm not in shape. I'm not tone. I could be worse (as obvious from the above pictures) but I could be so much better. For the record I refuse to revisit my habits from anorexia. I have to set a good example for my daughter. If I can't stand against the "nothing tastes as good as skinny feels" mindset then how on earth could I hope for her to be able to when I'm her #1 source of guidance? It would crush me to send her down that path.

I picked up The New Rules of Lifting for Women based on its extraordinary reviews from many people on this website. I plan on starting tomorrow (and would love some tips)! But man. Oh man am I scared to eat what it says to eat. I'll trust the program. I'll trust you guys (within reason haha). And I'm going to do my best!


Beginning_zps899fcaa2.jpg

Replies

  • emibrus1
    emibrus1 Posts: 59
    Haha I can't seem to get these photos right...I keeps automatically changing my URL addresses xD
  • xRachTasticx
    xRachTasticx Posts: 65 Member
    Use this
    [ img ]direct link to your image via photobucket [ / img]

    of course, don't use spaces. :)
  • michellekicks
    michellekicks Posts: 3,624 Member
    Hey there!

    Welcome to MFP :bigsmile:

    Congrats on having a healthy daughter and congrats on kicking ED to the curb :drinker:

    So you're 5'2" and about 150 lbs and 25 years old. If you start by aiming for about 135 lbs (top end of your BMI range since I don't know your body fat or build) you basically only have about 15-20 lbs to lose.

    But you want to look hot right? :bigsmile: So you need to lift some weights. And you picked up NROL4W... good stuff.

    If you follow the NROL program and lift as heavy as you can complete the workouts, you should eat somewhere around 1900 calories/day. That's assuming a 10% cut from a TDEE from 3-5 hours/week of moderate exercise. You will lose about 2 lbs/month, but the lifting will reshape your body far faster than just losing body fat. You'll be losing fat while gaining muscle.

    Aim to eat about 110g protein daily and stick to mostly clean foods... enjoy the treat stuff you like if it fits your macros (I figure just aim for protein and let fat/carbs land where they will up to your calorie target).

    You won't feel deprived. You will feel empowered. You should look amazing in about 6 months :bigsmile:
  • leahharris93
    leahharris93 Posts: 14 Member
    I found putting my height/weight etc into MFP gives you a rough idea of what you should be eating and how you should be progressing. It's really inspirational that you've gone through so much, but I'm glad you've found MFP because it's such a good way to become healthier, and the message boards are really helpful!
  • emibrus1
    emibrus1 Posts: 59
    Use this
    [ img ]direct link to your image via photobucket [ / img]

    of course, don't use spaces. :)

    I thought that was the right way to do it! For some reason even though I copy/paste my direct link URL into the post every time I submit my edit it scrambles part of my URL and prohibits that image. Like my "ka_*****" sub name becomes "ka_*****" (it actually is stars) when I reopen to edit. I WILL figure it out -fistshake-


    ---
    Thank you very much, Mrsbigmack! I survived on 300-400 dialing for almost a year (but I was miserable every moment of it) so the thought of going that high on purpose makes me feel faint xD But I've got to give it a shot! Diet's never been a problem -when I have to cut out a food I just do it- but the exercise...is totally new -sweatdrop-


    EDIT:
    WHHHHHHAT THE HECK IT SCREAMBLED IT?! It's "C-H-I-N-K" Like kaching! Do the filters think I'm trying to fling out a racial slur?!
  • leahharris93
    leahharris93 Posts: 14 Member
    I never basically never exercised before, but I found a really good podcast which is a running program for beginners. It starts with 60 seconds of running and 90 seconds of walking in week one, then 90 seconds of running and 60 seconds of walking then continues to build up over a 9 week program, until you're running for a full 30 minutes. The podcast keeps your motivated throughout and it builds you up slowly so you don't ever realise you're running for longer each week!
  • michellekicks
    michellekicks Posts: 3,624 Member
    Thank you very much, Mrsbigmack! I survived on 300-400 dialing for almost a year (but I was miserable every moment of it) so the thought of going that high on purpose makes me feel faint xD But I've got to give it a shot! Diet's never been a problem -when I have to cut out a food I just do it- but the exercise...is totally new -sweatdrop-

    If you're shredding your muscles by lifting heavy, the extra calories will be all used up in repairing those muscles. You will get stronger and the muscles will get bigger. The muscles will then burn more calories just every day... so you won't be inclined to store as much fat as you do even now. I've been spending time reading about bulking... and even eating at a 400-500 calorie surplus for weeks women who are lifting are only putting on maybe 5-8 lbs of fat in 3 months and about the same in muscle.

    Basically, if you eat at a surplus and don't lift you get fat. If you eat at a small surplus and lift you get muscles. I would lift :wink: because even if your metabolism is screwed up and your BMR is lower than anticipated, if you're following that NROL program, your body will just have more calories to build muscle out of.
  • emibrus1
    emibrus1 Posts: 59
    AHA I GOT IT TO WORK =D

    MFP must have some sort of bot filter that choked at the word "c-h-i-n-k". So I made a new photobucket account with this username. Voila! Photo magic!

    --

    I am interested in the cardio, LeahHarris! But I saw that with weight lifting there should be less emphasis on it. I think a small combo might be nice...but it's fair to mention that I've never been a fan of running!

    Also- What's a podcast @_@ What do I have to have to use one?

    Mrsbigmack it's not the weight gain that bothers me so long as it's not fat gain =D I'm not scared of staying at 150 so long as I look good at it...but I imagine if I was truly healthy I would weigh less! Slow and steady is fine by me at this point in my life. I did the fast method years ago and I'll pay for it the rest of my life.
  • xRachTasticx
    xRachTasticx Posts: 65 Member
    Glad you got it to work! Thanks for sharing your story with us. You're a very strong young woman. I'm reading so much about lifting that I'm thinking about looking into it too. Feel free to add me for some motivational support!

    I've found that since finding a few friends on here that I feel so much stronger about staying focused! :)

    You're gonna look awesome! :)
  • emibrus1
    emibrus1 Posts: 59
    Than you, Rachtastic =D Having friends for boosting weight loss is also strange to me (anorexia is in particular a lonely sort of disease that leaves no room for social interaction) but I can't see how it'd hurt to try. I'm starting the lifting today while I still have the nerve to xD I'll definitely let you know how it goes if you're still curious about lifting.

    I love your hair! I don't know how to do anything with mine other than straightening it...I've never been able to figure out how to use a curling iron no matter how many youtube videos I look at haha!
  • xRachTasticx
    xRachTasticx Posts: 65 Member
    Aww thank you! I don't know how to do anything with mine either honestly. It's naturally curly, so it decides whether or not it's going to look good that day. Some days I wake up and it is in a good mood, but most of the time it's a mess :)
  • MorgueBabe
    MorgueBabe Posts: 1,188 Member
    Hello!
  • tasharosemurphy
    tasharosemurphy Posts: 4
    hi :)
  • emibrus1
    emibrus1 Posts: 59
    Oh man do I know about naturally curly hair! Not because of me (I'm more wavy)..but because of my daughter! Her hair is crazy xD People go gaga for her hair though...I'm pretty sure if I had those kinds of crazy curls people would just assume I was homeless -headdesk- Here's my little stinker (she just turned 3 in March)!

    9e0895ef-b98e-409c-af45-bb7e24d91554_zps8e4d79b7.jpg

    --

    And hello to both you ladies! Thank you so much for taking the time to drop a reply!
  • SteelySunshine
    SteelySunshine Posts: 1,092 Member
    I am so glad you got your mind in the right place. You are very strong willed so that can be a both a blessing and a curse as you story has proven. My only advice at this point is to set limits on your exercise time. I have a tendency myself (can't tell from my pic) to be somewhat obsessive. I am trying very hard to not push myself past my limits, but it is very tempting to try to do more than I am realistically capable on a daily basis.
  • xRachTasticx
    xRachTasticx Posts: 65 Member
    She is gorgeous!
  • emibrus1
    emibrus1 Posts: 59
    SteelySunshine - Don't knock yourself on your picture! 16 pounds is more than most people can manage =D You're doing awesome!

    I am very, very fortunate that my husband has been with me from the beginning. Even before I got sick (we've been close friends now for 11 years). He was the one who made me get help and who cheered me on even when I struggled. He's a blessing. A sometimes unbelievably irritating blessing xD I owe him a lot! But even though he believes in me he's very cautious about what I'm doing. He does every diet and exercise program with me (he's doing the for men lifting though). Helps me stay on track and follow the rules! If this program doesn't work he'll just patiently wait until I find something else I want to try xDD I'll never be left to go it alone...and I'm so glad! I'm a bit scrambled in the head so I need a counterweight to keep my expectations in balance <3

    ---
    Thank you, Rachtastic! I worry for her constantly. I worry about how society's standards will shift in the future and whether or not she'll try and follow them. I worry about bullying. I worry about the "you have such a pretty face...but if you lost 10 pounds you'd be beautiful" comments. SO MANY WORRIES! I want to teach her from the start how to be strong and defy what modern society says she should do. And to stand up for herself (and those that can't themselves) no matter what!

    (plus if I'm sporting massive biceps by then I'll just crush the skulls of her tormenters bwhahahaha)

Categories