I don't know how to eat meals...

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thinlillies
thinlillies Posts: 14
in Food and Nutrition
Hello! I know, strange subject.
I'm a college student and for years I haven't been able to eat normally. I used to binge eat and now that I'm getting over that, I am still going to snack foods to make up all of the calories I'm allowed to consume a day.
The last time I remember having family meals was back in middle school... and I haven't really had planned meals ever since. I would always just eat 1,200 calories in cookies and the likes when I was in high school.
I have no idea how to change this habit because it is so ingrained into me. I feel left out all of the time because I cannot join my friends in having breakfast, lunch, or dinner because it is highly likely that I've consumed the amount that I allow myself to consume all in one blow.
Has anyone had a situation similar to mine and could possibly help guide me to a solution? I know it will not be a quick fix as it involves changing my entire perspective on food.
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Replies

  • BarackMeLikeAHurricane
    BarackMeLikeAHurricane Posts: 3,400 Member
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    You can eat all of your calories at once. I use <50 calories during the day for things like coffee and BCAA's before I workout and then eat all of my calories for dinner.
  • LoraF83
    LoraF83 Posts: 15,694 Member
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    I would suggest talking to a nutritionist and/or counselor to help you get through this and develop a "normal" attitude towards food again.
  • Lifting_Knitter
    Lifting_Knitter Posts: 1,025
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    I would suggest talking to a nutritionist and/or counselor to help you get through this and develop a "normal" attitude towards food again.

    And baby steps. You aren't going to change this overnight.
  • timbrom
    timbrom Posts: 303 Member
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    Honestly, the best place to start is probably with your college's counseling center (every college I've been involved with has one, and it's usually free). They'll probably have much better advice than random people on the Interwebz (except me, I have good advice...:)
  • bcattoes
    bcattoes Posts: 17,299 Member
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    I would suggest talking to a nutritionist and/or counselor to help you get through this and develop a "normal" attitude towards food again.

    This ^^
  • Bettyeditor
    Bettyeditor Posts: 327 Member
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    Two things are required to get off the binge cycle: high-quality nutritionally dense foods, and eating enough calories.

    I suggest that you find out your TDEE and eat no less than 10% below that to lose weight. Your TDEE might be around 1800 or higher, which would put your weight loss calories around 1600. You can lose weight at too few calories (1200) and at TDEE -10% (possibly around 1600), but there is a big difference in your results. Undereating is always accompanied by overeating. If you eat a healthier amount of calories, your body won't be so starved.

    Also, ensure that when you do eat, you are giving yourself what you need. If you are going to obsess on your food, then obsess about giving yourself 100% of the RDA of calcium and Vit. A and Vit. C and Iron and the minimum amount of protein that you should have and carbs and fats. Because if you get the nutrients that your body is craving... then it won't crave things anymore. You won't get the urge to binge anymore.
  • Shetchncn1
    Shetchncn1 Posts: 260 Member
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    I would suggest talking to a nutritionist and/or counselor to help you get through this and develop a "normal" attitude towards food again.

    This. If you don't train yourself how to eat well then you are seriously going to hurt yourself in the long run! Not to mention if you ever have a family how are you going to train your kids to eat right?
  • thinlillies
    thinlillies Posts: 14
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    Thank you guys!
    I have seen a nutritionist once in college and her services were free. I was only able to make it to one though as my schedule was so hectic and I couldn't really prioritize getting help. I will be busy this summer as well interning, but I think it would be much easier to seek out help now.
  • scinamon1
    scinamon1 Posts: 158 Member
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    I know what you mean! I'm at uni too, and if I haven't eaten well in the morning I hate not being able to eat with my friends later in the day. I try having either low calorie meals or snacks at the same time as they are eating. Stir fried veg., for example- you can have a huge bowl and join in the socialising around cooking and eating, but it would only be about 150 calories if you don't use too much oil.

    Another thing I've found useful is we all eat breakfast together, do work at the dining table, and agree on a time for lunch. Then you have a kind of 'only an hour til lunch' perspective. I guess it depends if you are in halls or a house, but we use this to make us do uni work too- we call each other out for slacking on work if someone starts procrastinating.

    Maybe timing your snacks with mealtimes might help? There was also a good book I read called 'getting better bite by bite.' I couldn't stick with it, but it was very interesting.

    Hope this helps a bit!
  • ehsan517
    ehsan517 Posts: 114
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    sorry....sorry again that im saying this, but the answer is right in your question.

    dont eat 1200 cals in cookies. please just TRY to eat like normal people. eat one cookie...eat maybe 2 cookies at most. but this habit daily will ruin your other meals cause they are so bad and calorie dense. id rather have 300g sweet potatoes, fat free cheese and chicken breast in one meal which will add upto the same cals as one big cookie.(400 cals roughly)

    your answer is simple once again, dont eat up all your allowed calories from crappy food.
    also, 1200 cals is too low. find your BMR and stick to that daily, no matter what cause thats what you need to survive. if you wanna be able to eat more but not gain weight, the answer is exercise. for eg, im trying to put on weight in muscle just so that i can eat more on a daily basis afterwards cause heavier muscle mass means more calories needed to get by the day.

    its about a lifestyle and a habit..its never a diet. force yourself to make these changes and the results will surprise you. eat balanced healthy meals with nutrient dense foods...at first it will suck, but you will see results fairly quickly and the main result will come from your mood and how you will feel. feel free to add me in case you have any questions cause im always willing to help..and i could go on and on and on but i would rather not type an essay.

    good luck! :D
  • LoraF83
    LoraF83 Posts: 15,694 Member
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    Thank you guys!
    I have seen a nutritionist once in college and her services were free. I was only able to make it to one though as my schedule was so hectic and I couldn't really prioritize getting help. I will be busy this summer as well interning, but I think it would be much easier to seek out help now.

    Long term, lasting success that will allow you to function normally around food is a priority. I know it doesn't seem like it now, but you need to MAKE the time now. You will thank yourself later.

    You are worth being a priority in your own life.
  • workavoidance
    workavoidance Posts: 28
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    I have been working on this exact issue for about a year. The solution for me really has been to limit snacks to an AM snack and an afternoon snack and banish snack food the rest of the day. i.e. make myself eat real food at real meals. It sort of sucks. The first thing I did was completely cut out protein bars and meal replacements-- which I had been known to live on for weeks at a time -- and I gave myself a challenge to eat a real dinner every night for two weeks. It takes baby steps to change long time habits.

    Also, I now make myself eat a small meal even if I have slipped up and eaten too many calories in snacks. It keeps me on track going forward and out of the overeat junk then restrict mentality.
  • thinlillies
    thinlillies Posts: 14
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    id rather have 300g sweet potatoes, fat free cheese and chicken breast in one meal which will add upto the same cals as one big cookie.(400 cals roughly)

    Wow, I certainly would as well. Thank you. I realize I need to prioritize getting healthy now more than ever. I feel the effects of what I've been doing to a greater extent i.e. being more lethargic/not very focused/etc.

    I am exercising as well so I need even more energy and not changing my diet with exercise has been making things even worse.
    It's such a difficult habit to break because I know the foods I eat are very artificial and addictive.

    Thank you all for your kindness and great suggestions. I will take all of them to heart as I try to beat this stupid, stupid habit out of my life! :)
  • thinlillies
    thinlillies Posts: 14
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    I have been working on this exact issue for about a year. The solution for me really has been to limit snacks to an AM snack and an afternoon snack and banish snack food the rest of the day. i.e. make myself eat real food at real meals. It sort of sucks. The first thing I did was completely cut out protein bars and meal replacements-- which I had been known to live on for weeks at a time -- and I gave myself a challenge to eat a real dinner every night for two weeks. It takes baby steps to change long time habits.

    I am relieved that other people are experiencing similar things. I, too, had a period of time where all I would eat were Luna bars. Then Luna bars slowly changed into biscottis, of which I would eat around 8 of and then fill the rest of my calories with more junk. It is so exhausting and I know in my mind that I would prefer to have a real meal, but it was so convenient.
    I have to start learning to make my own food, especially since I'm going to be living out of the dorms next year.
  • ehsan517
    ehsan517 Posts: 114
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    thanks for the add. and you are very much welcome.
    like i said..its about making it a lifestyle..looking forward to cooking...looking forward to preparing meals..playing around with different foods to hit your goals..i`ve discovered so many great combinations just like this
    eg, oatmeal for breakfast right? bland? well i add cinnamon,stevia and sprinkle sugar free jello mix and viola! under 200 cals, and a tasty breakfast which takes under 2 mins to make. this is something i just came up with basically.

    you dont have to be strict...you dont have to be super dead on....its a slow and gradual process...as long as you aim to get there slowly and steadily, it will happen and you have a lot of support here. no one expects you to be perfect and eat the "right" way cause there is none....just slowly start making changes which will become habits in the long run. im a student too and i know exactly what you mean. like right now, im gonna go ahead and prepare 3 days worth of chicken in one go so that i save time..im gonna make it taste great with low sodium spices and herbs and lemon...once you get started you will discover a creative side to yourself you never knew existed! :)
  • thinlillies
    thinlillies Posts: 14
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    Experimenting with food does sound more fun than I thought it could be. :)
    I SHOULD change my perspective and look at it as bringing out a creative side in myself. Grabbing whatever is convenient isn't very exciting.
    I'll look up some healthy but enticing recipes online and print them out.
  • lisahewitt22
    lisahewitt22 Posts: 102
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    I'm the same way. Lately I'll have breakfast, lunch, and dinner which will use up most of my calories and then, seeing that I have about 200 calories left, I'll go in for a little "snack" and come out having eaten 700 more calories.
  • jen_zz
    jen_zz Posts: 1,011 Member
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    I have been working on this exact issue for about a year. The solution for me really has been to limit snacks to an AM snack and an afternoon snack and banish snack food the rest of the day. i.e. make myself eat real food at real meals. It sort of sucks. The first thing I did was completely cut out protein bars and meal replacements-- which I had been known to live on for weeks at a time -- and I gave myself a challenge to eat a real dinner every night for two weeks. It takes baby steps to change long time habits.

    I am relieved that other people are experiencing similar things. I, too, had a period of time where all I would eat were Luna bars. Then Luna bars slowly changed into biscottis, of which I would eat around 8 of and then fill the rest of my calories with more junk. It is so exhausting and I know in my mind that I would prefer to have a real meal, but it was so convenient.
    I have to start learning to make my own food, especially since I'm going to be living out of the dorms next year.

    Tell me about it! Sometimes my lunch would be 2 Quest bars. Or say tonight my dinner was Doritos..
    I'm almost afraid to have real meals at times since I always crave junk food after a proper meal no matter how full I am, so in order to stay within my calorie budget sometimes I just eat junk as a meal..
  • workavoidance
    workavoidance Posts: 28
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    In honor of this post I had a bag of chocolate covered almonds for lunch. Uhhhhgggg. That's the last time... I swear... Anyone want to do like a 30 day challenge with me? I finish my last law school final this week, and I'm starting serious physical training for a trip, so it's a good time to do an overhaul.
  • LorinaLynn
    LorinaLynn Posts: 13,248 Member
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    In addition to what's already been suggested, use your food diary to plan your food, rather than just record it.

    Talk to a nutritionist and figure out what you should be eating in a day (1200 is likely too low for someone as young as you are), and use that to plan your day. Make sure you're getting fruits, vegetables, protein and fat, and whatever carbs you enjoy in an amount that will fit your goals.

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