Vent...honesty, etc
sara_alexandra
Posts: 65 Member
No need to comment if you don't want, but I just felt like I needed to vent "out loud" internet-style. I'm so frustrated with myself. I've been trying so hard for at least 5 years now to get the body I want and feel happy with. I just am not getting there. I crossfit all the time. Try running. Just started hot yoga. I feel like even though I don't eat perfectly, i monitor ALL the time and still at the end of the day, i'm not making the progress i need. I feel uncomfortable in this body. I'm so pissed at myself every time I go over my daily allotment. Especially on the weekends when i'll do well all week, then Friday and Saturday are WAY over and I don't make progress. I just need to find the strength inside to be consistent. Why the H*LL can't I be consistent when I want something so badly?? ITS SO FRUSTRATING. I need at least one week where I lose something to make me feel like I'm not doing this for nothing & my efforts are getting me nowhere. I just wish i could find the same willpower as so many here on this site to break through and make it happen.
Thanks for listening, and like i said...i'm not looking for sympathy or anything. I just wanted to get it out.
-Sara
Thanks for listening, and like i said...i'm not looking for sympathy or anything. I just wanted to get it out.
-Sara
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Replies
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Your efforts are not getting you nowhere! You are so much healthier than you would be if you weren't doing what you are doing. I totally understand your frustration...it can be really hard sometimes. Give yourself a break. Keep trying different things...I'm currently loving both Zumba and Spinning, 2 things I just recently started doing.
Give yourself a pat on the back for caring about yourself as you do...you're doing better than most.
Cheers.
You look fit in your profile pic BTW
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Your efforts are not getting you nowhere! You are so much healthier than you would be if you weren't doing what you are doing. I totally understand your frustration...it can be really hard sometimes. Give yourself a break. Keep trying different things...I'm currently loving both Zumba and Spinning, 2 things I just recently started doing.
Give yourself a pat on the back for caring about yourself as you do...you're doing better than most.
Cheers.
You look fit in your profile pic BTW
Thanks Lauren! It's just weird when I feel like I work out so much and really do try 5 out of 7 days of the week to not go over my calories, let i'm still not losing. ugh.0 -
I do the same thing. I have had success in the past losing weight. This time.. it is just like I'm treading water. My conclusion is that when I've been successful...has been when I' ve cut out certain things completely. ie; fats, red meat, starches. All that does is create a calorie deficit..but it worked for me.
I find counting calories and "allowing" myself everything within my calorie limit sounds reasonable and logical..but it makes me go over on the weekends..or here and there. and i not getting anywhere..
So try cutting out some things completely...like carbs from bread, potatoes, and rice, beans and sugar..and see if that works.0 -
Keep in mind that our food intake is 80% of the whole picture. Try working on staying within the daily allotment on the weekdays. and allowing yourself some freedom on the weekends. When this become more managable cut it down to one cheat day on the weekend. I have been fighting the same battle as you and you can look at my history and see I haven't budged much. But I stopped recording my progress because I wasn't sticking with it so I gained more weight that I didn't reflect on my profile, but I have finally gotten fed up and by preparing my meals on ahead or at least prepping a good grocery list so I can make healthy sandwiches and fresh food snacks, I now just grab and go. The pounds are finally coming off and by adding my workouts I am really seeing a difference. I hope I've helped. I know how discouraging it all is. I think I've been on a diet my whole life, but I do wish you the very best. You just gotta get it in your head that you are going to be strict on yourself and once you start seeing the results which can take a couple weeks, you will want to keep going. You can do it...You know you can!!!!0
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I do the same thing. I have had success in the past losing weight. This time.. it is just like I'm treading water. My conclusion is that when I've been successful...has been when I' ve cut out certain things completely. ie; fats, red meat, starches. All that does is create a calorie deficit..but it worked for me.
I find counting calories and "allowing" myself everything within my calorie limit sounds reasonable and logical..but it makes me go over on the weekends..or here and there. and i not getting anywhere..
So try cutting out some things completely...like carbs from bread, potatoes, and rice, beans and sugar..and see if that works.
I feel the same. I hate cutting things out because it's not a lifelong, realistic solution for me. But for the time being, I did decide to not have bread or pasta. Maybe I should do rice and potatoes too.0 -
Keep in mind that our food intake is 80% of the whole picture. Try working on staying within the daily allotment on the weekdays. and allowing yourself some freedom on the weekends. When this become more managable cut it down to one cheat day on the weekend. I have been fighting the same battle as you and you can look at my history and see I haven't budged much. But I stopped recording my progress because I wasn't sticking with it so I gained more weight that I didn't reflect on my profile, but I have finally gotten fed up and by preparing my meals on ahead or at least prepping a good grocery list so I can make healthy sandwiches and fresh food snacks, I now just grab and go. The pounds are finally coming off and by adding my workouts I am really seeing a difference. I hope I've helped. I know how discouraging it all is. I think I've been on a diet my whole life, but I do wish you the very best. You just gotta get it in your head that you are going to be strict on yourself and once you start seeing the results which can take a couple weeks, you will want to keep going. You can do it...You know you can!!!!
Thank you for the encouragement. I totally always keep in mind that the loss is 80% food. Like I said (and you reiterated), I just need the scale to budge a little, and I can hopefully be in a better mindset.0 -
Just think of where you would be if you weren't so good those 5 days a week. It's all a matter of perspective. Keep healthy and never stop trying new things.0
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I agree with the other posters saying you have done so much for yourself - health, discipline, tenacity, persistence - all very highly admirable qualities.
Have you thought about asking a personal trainer for advice? The cheats version (and non-committal) is where a gym offers a free 'taster' session. Not every exercise works for everyone. Or maybe even a nutrioinist to get everything 'blessed' (not sure how else to say it)
However you get on, please let me know as I've stalled on weight loss so far this year. Until I saw your post I thought I was about to hit the point you're at. Then saw your 5 years vs. my 1 year and felt like a total flake.
Add 'inspirational' to your admirable qualities :-)0 -
I agree with the other posters saying you have done so much for yourself - health, discipline, tenacity, persistence - all very highly admirable qualities.
Have you thought about asking a personal trainer for advice? The cheats version (and non-committal) is where a gym offers a free 'taster' session. Not every exercise works for everyone. Or maybe even a nutrioinist to get everything 'blessed' (not sure how else to say it)
However you get on, please let me know as I've stalled on weight loss so far this year. Until I saw your post I thought I was about to hit the point you're at. Then saw your 5 years vs. my 1 year and felt like a total flake.
Add 'inspirational' to your admirable qualities :-)
I'm ALWAYS trying to get advice from nutritionists/trainers, etc. It's all the same really. So I'm thinking it's just me going over on the weekends that's screwing with me progress :-(.0 -
I do the same thing. I have had success in the past losing weight. This time.. it is just like I'm treading water. My conclusion is that when I've been successful...has been when I' ve cut out certain things completely. ie; fats, red meat, starches. All that does is create a calorie deficit..but it worked for me.
I find counting calories and "allowing" myself everything within my calorie limit sounds reasonable and logical..but it makes me go over on the weekends..or here and there. and i not getting anywhere..
So try cutting out some things completely...like carbs from bread, potatoes, and rice, beans and sugar..and see if that works.
I feel the same. I hate cutting things out because it's not a lifelong, realistic solution for me. But for the time being, I did decide to not have bread or pasta. Maybe I should do rice and potatoes too.
You can still have those things - maybe switch to whole grain versions or think about alternatives. Try quinoa or another grain.0 -
Okay, first off. As an outisde observer, I have no clue where you started, but you look pretty good to me in that picture fitness wise. So make sure you realize you have made progress to be where you are.
I will throw something out there, again as an outside observer here so I could be way off base, but could it be that you don't have realistic goals for your body? And I don't mean that you couldn't reach your goal, but that given things like work, family, realtaionship, school, whatever that over the past year you've actually maximized your efforts evern though you might not have reasched your ultimate goal? I know for me, I would love to just be cut and ripped, but given all the regular daily things I just don't have that kind of time and effort to dedicate to the body I would love. That isn't to say I haven't done pretty darn good for myself. I just had to come to a happy medium right now. So maybe take a look at everything overall in your life and see if you might be doing better than you think given all you've accomplished. Then continue to look forward and find ways you might fit in that next level goal you want.
Just don't ever forget your progress.
Good luck!0 -
When I'm sticking to it, what has worked for me is eating fewer net calories Monday through Wednesday to make up for the fact that 2 or 3 days starting Thursday will be worse calorie wise. Especially when Sunday used to be my day of rest in terms of exercise.0
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The weekends are honestly pry hurting you a bit To be honest - try to keep it going over the weekend. Don't necessarily have to track but be smarter about your choices. Watch your processed carbs intake.
Also, maybe try doing a deload week. Give your body a nice rest then go back since you are crossfitting so hard so often. REst days are keys also to seeing progress0 -
Have you got your body fat checked? maybe if you're tracking in more than one way (besides the # on the scale) that would help?
For myself, I've been hovering around 147 for MONTHS now. BUT I am fitting better in my dresses, tried on my swim suit from last summer and it looks 10000 times better than last summer.
I also struggle on the weekends. One thing that does help me, is I have a rest day in the middle of the week and workout one day on the weekend. Maybe try that and see if that helps you on the weekend. 0 -
Oh Sara I so agree. I've been at this for YEARS and still am 31 lbs away from where I want to be. It's so frustrating and I keep telling myself to plug along...try this or that. Now I"m trying to 'up' my calories to go along with my walking (4 mph brisk pace every day), and have added Jillian Michaels yoga back in. I think my problem was TOO FEW calories. I deprived myself, as my diary was showing. I also want to add in some walking through a local forest on the weekends. If you need the motivation I do you can add me We'll figure it out. If not...well we are healthier for trying! 0
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I know exactly what you aer saying. I was thinking about this very thing this morning, because I am in the same boat as you. I crossfit and run 5-6 days a week, and eat good Mon-Fri, indulge a little on the weekends, but still feel like I am not getting anywhere. I'm glad I'm not the only one in this boat. Just keep working hard though. It's so frustrating, but I agree with a previous post that pointed out how we are overall healthier than where we were because of all the work we do. We can do this! Don't give up!!0
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Your 5 on/2 off plan is a great plan for maintenance. It's not a great plan for losing weight, especially if you don't have much to lose.
I have done the same thing and maintained for a long time. I finally got serious and decided that I would do a 7-day-on plan for 28 days to try to lose my last bit of fat. It is working fairly well, even though I have not been absolutely perfect.
When the 28 days are up, I will return to my 5/2 maintenance behavior for a few weeks to take a psychological break, and then do another limited cut -- probably 21 days. I am planning to keep cycling maintenance and cuts until I get my last 12 pounds off.
Unfortunately, it all comes down to how much you want to lose weight vs. how much you want to indulge on the weekends. I wanted to lose weight a lot more when I was really fat, and there was more room for error in my diet. Now that I only have 12 pounds to lose, it is a little harder to stay motivated, and also requires much tighter control of the calories. Ultimately, you have to decide which you want more.0 -
Keep in mind that our food intake is 80% of the whole picture. Try working on staying within the daily allotment on the weekdays. and allowing yourself some freedom on the weekends. When this become more managable cut it down to one cheat day on the weekend. I have been fighting the same battle as you and you can look at my history and see I haven't budged much. But I stopped recording my progress because I wasn't sticking with it so I gained more weight that I didn't reflect on my profile, but I have finally gotten fed up and by preparing my meals on ahead or at least prepping a good grocery list so I can make healthy sandwiches and fresh food snacks, I now just grab and go. The pounds are finally coming off and by adding my workouts I am really seeing a difference. I hope I've helped. I know how discouraging it all is. I think I've been on a diet my whole life, but I do wish you the very best. You just gotta get it in your head that you are going to be strict on yourself and once you start seeing the results which can take a couple weeks, you will want to keep going. You can do it...You know you can!!!!
Thank you for the encouragement. I totally always keep in mind that the loss is 80% food. Like I said (and you reiterated), I just need the scale to budge a little, and I can hopefully be in a better mindset.
Have you considered focusing on non-scale victories for awhile? Maybe compare pictures of yourself from when you started to now? Or take measurements? Or congratulate yourself that you can do X when you couldn't do it a month ago? Or congratulate yourself that you ate a vegetable/fruit at every meal?
The scale moving downward is only one way to measure progress.0 -
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Okay, first off. As an outisde observer, I have no clue where you started, but you look pretty good to me in that picture fitness wise. So make sure you realize you have made progress to be where you are.
I will throw something out there, again as an outside observer here so I could be way off base, but could it be that you don't have realistic goals for your body? And I don't mean that you couldn't reach your goal, but that given things like work, family, realtaionship, school, whatever that over the past year you've actually maximized your efforts evern though you might not have reasched your ultimate goal? I know for me, I would love to just be cut and ripped, but given all the regular daily things I just don't have that kind of time and effort to dedicate to the body I would love. That isn't to say I haven't done pretty darn good for myself. I just had to come to a happy medium right now. So maybe take a look at everything overall in your life and see if you might be doing better than you think given all you've accomplished. Then continue to look forward and find ways you might fit in that next level goal you want.
Just don't ever forget your progress.
Good luck!
Really appreciate this reply actually. It's very true. I think sometimes I do have unrealistic goals for myself. I do try the best I can to track my food and work out a lot. The working out part has been great. I started Crossfit a year ago, and have gone really consistently since then. That IS a huge accomplishment that I sometimes undermine. I think that I just have this idea of how I'd like to look...and to get back to a comfortable weight. I might also have a little bit of body dysmorphia going on. Who knows.0 -
When I'm sticking to it, what has worked for me is eating fewer net calories Monday through Wednesday to make up for the fact that 2 or 3 days starting Thursday will be worse calorie wise. Especially when Sunday used to be my day of rest in terms of exercise.
That's a good idea. I'm going to try that out, thanks!0 -
Your 5 on/2 off plan is a great plan for maintenance. It's not a great plan for losing weight, especially if you don't have much to lose.
I have done the same thing and maintained for a long time. I finally got serious and decided that I would do a 7-day-on plan for 28 days to try to lose my last bit of fat. It is working fairly well, even though I have not been absolutely perfect.
When the 28 days are up, I will return to my 5/2 maintenance behavior for a few weeks to take a psychological break, and then do another limited cut -- probably 21 days. I am planning to keep cycling maintenance and cuts until I get my last 12 pounds off.
Unfortunately, it all comes down to how much you want to lose weight vs. how much you want to indulge on the weekends. I wanted to lose weight a lot more when I was really fat, and there was more room for error in my diet. Now that I only have 12 pounds to lose, it is a little harder to stay motivated, and also requires much tighter control of the calories. Ultimately, you have to decide which you want more.
Yeeeeeeea i figured those 2 days were stalling my progress. You're right. I'm going to have to get focused if I really want to see things happen. Thanks so much for your input.0 -
Thanks so much everyone. All of your advice and comments are helpful and thought-provoking. I think we really all do need to keep in mind that our habits as trackers are better off than when we didn't track at all. It's difficult to not see the exact progress I want, but I'm going to just keep on keeping on. Such a great thread/community. THANKS AGAIN! xo
Sara0 -
I feel the same way....I know my weekends could use some improvement, and I am hoping that when the weather finally gets nice, and stays nice, I will have more energy and be outside more and be active. I did so well losing weight a couple years ago (with little effort outside of going to the gym) and am upset with myself all the time for gaining a few pounds back in the last 6 months so. It's frustrating for sure!0
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Wanted to save this 0 -
Ahh yeah, sometimes you just gotta let it all out to feel better!
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Great vent. I wish I could go out and do the exercise you do. I am jealous. I did water aerobics three times this week, and my hip is killing me. I'm sitting here looking at my bottle of pain pills and asking myself why I'm hurting so bad, and not feeling great after exercising? I need to lose 50 lbs and I have to rein back on my calories and be rational about exercising or it isn't going to happen. That's my honest crappy truth. I agree with the person who says you would be in a lot worse shape if you didn't.0
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