Spousal "Support"

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Replies

  • andyisandy
    andyisandy Posts: 433 Member
    I don't think he's jealous.

    I don't think he's sabotaging your weight loss.

    I think he's a relatively in shape guy who doesn't put an especially high emphasis on health and fitness.

    I would have a conversation with him letting him know how important this is to you.

    If that doesn't work it might be time to rethink things.
    i think this is the best answer so far
  • KANGOOJUMPS
    KANGOOJUMPS Posts: 6,474 Member
    I find some times when you lose the weight and get hotter looking, the hubs gets jealous cause there are many more men looking at you more often,do what you want, not what he wants
  • meeper123
    meeper123 Posts: 3,347 Member
    Just curious is he also over weight he might feel if you lose the weight you wont want him anymore. You need to be healthy and happy and he should want that for you as well. Sit him down and talk to him. Find things that you can do as a couple. evening walks, a hike, or maybe even golf :) Get him involved and he will be more supportive. If he is ONLY doing this because he finds bigger women attractive that might be a deal breaker and not a healthy thing to be around.
  • AlongCame_Molly
    AlongCame_Molly Posts: 2,835 Member
    Give him a taste of his own medicine. Tease him about his laziness, his weight, his "faults".

    That's a brilliant idea. I can't see any way that that might go wrong and blow up in your face. :noway:
  • cindybowcut
    cindybowcut Posts: 250 Member
    Remind him that you are doing this to be healthy not to be skinny. If you don't take care of yourself, you won't be around to take care of anybody else. You said that you are off your diabetes meds, remind him that diabetes is one of the #1 causes of death. I have seen what it can do, my dad had a stroke due to complications from his diabetes. He lost use of his left arm and can't get around without a cane. I am also diabetic which is why I am losing weight, I have been off my meds since April 2012. Continue doing what you are doing, if he truly loves you he will support you.
  • craigmandu
    craigmandu Posts: 976 Member
    Give him a taste of his own medicine. Tease him about his laziness, his weight, his "faults".

    That's a brilliant idea. I can't see any way that that might go wrong and blow up in your face. :noway:

    QFT...the answer isn't to create more "drama" over it.

    I would simply let him know that this is something you want to pursue and you want it to take priority of other mundane things.

    He'll either accept that or he won't. Either way, you need to talk about it.
  • Mmmmona
    Mmmmona Posts: 328 Member
    Give him a taste of his own medicine. Tease him about his laziness, his weight, his "faults".

    That's a brilliant idea. I can't see any way that that might go wrong and blow up in your face. :noway:

    QFT...the answer isn't to create more "drama" over it.

    I would simply let him know that this is something you want to pursue and you want it to take priority of other mundane things.

    He'll either accept that or he won't. Either way, you need to talk about it.

    If you can't have fun with your spouse, you should reconsider your life.
  • aidane218
    aidane218 Posts: 8
    No, he is in GREAT SHAPE. He is 40 and looks about 32. He is a very good looking man. He prefers larger women. Ugh. ;) Thank you for your input!
  • aidane218
    aidane218 Posts: 8
    Remind him that you are doing this to be healthy not to be skinny. If you don't take care of yourself, you won't be around to take care of anybody else. You said that you are off your diabetes meds, remind him that diabetes is one of the #1 causes of death. I have seen what it can do, my dad had a stroke due to complications from his diabetes. He lost use of his left arm and can't get around without a cane. I am also diabetic which is why I am losing weight, I have been off my meds since April 2012. Continue doing what you are doing, if he truly loves you he will support you.

    My brother is younger than I, all his weight in his belly but is blind from Diabetes and is slowly headed toward a wheelchair from his Neuropathy. Congrats to you! It is so liberating not taking all those pills anymore. I was borderline insulin dependent. I empathize! Thank you!
  • meeper123
    meeper123 Posts: 3,347 Member
    No, he is in GREAT SHAPE. He is 40 and looks about 32. He is a very good looking man. He prefers larger women. Ugh. ;) Thank you for your input!

    He just has to get over it. If he wants to be with you tell him you will be healthy or he can hit the road. Don't use this as an excuse to cave in. You will regret it.
  • MrsG2
    MrsG2 Posts: 56 Member
    A boyfriend can get on board or get lost. There's the door, buddy, don't let it hit ya where the good Lord split ya.

    That's my first reaction. HOWEVER, in deference to the apparent fact that you love this guy and want to make the relationship work, talk to him. It's not unusual for a man with a heavy partner to fear losing that partner to someone else (read: a younger, fitter man) when the partner starts losing significant weight. You look better, you feel better, and in his mind you may deserve better. If that's the case, smack him one upside the head for being an idiot and reassure him that you are doing this to be healthy, not so you can land a "better catch".

    Honestly though, if he can't resign himself to a slimmer, healthier you, then you really need to do some hard thinking about whether he's the person you want teaching your kids what a good relationship looks like.

    Well said.

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