I'm starting again after several attempts and failing.

mshopey
mshopey Posts: 125 Member
in Introduce Yourself
This is what i looked like when i first met my fiance, and i still can't believe it, but i thought i was fat, my whole family is a size 8, so if there was ever an argument, my weight would be the first thing mentioned. I was in college here, and everyone bullied me because of my weight. The first date i ever went on (before my fiance) told my friend he didn't want to go on a second date with me, because even if i overdosed on diet pills, i wouldn't be slim enough to be sexy. My whole life my weight has bothered and upset me.


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The worst thing is, i would do anything to be that size again, in 4 years i have put on 6 stone (that's 84+ pounds) that's been happy eating with my boyfriend and moving in together. My mom always portion controlled for me. And when i lived at home i had no job, so no extra money for crappy food like takeaways and things. And now we're getting married this year, and i feel disgusting. I'm hoping no takes the pee, cause we're all here for the same reason. But i am devastated that i've let it get this far, when i look at the old photos of myself, i can't believe how good i actually looked. And yet still curvy. I know i've got a long way to go to look half that good. And i would love some friends to help me on my journey. Any takers?

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Replies

  • butterflyluv1218
    butterflyluv1218 Posts: 430
    You're still beautiful. :) I'll friend request you. I'm also starting again and could use the encouragement. You can do it.
  • saiward
    saiward Posts: 5 Member
    First off, don't let others opinions of you define who you are. Take on new challenges, and dont' give up! It's a lifestyle change & that takes some serious work. I am starting on this journey again & know I have a long road ahead. Good luck! So very brave of you to post your feelings & photos at the beginning of your journey.
  • Jackie_XOXOXO
    Jackie_XOXOXO Posts: 93 Member
    Dont be so down on yourself. You have decided to get back aon track and thats important. We all fall behind sometimes. Your Wedding dress is gorgeous and your Fiance loves you fo you if he has seen you transition and still around. Now just make healthier choices and as time passes you will feel and look better than you do now. Feel free to add me. You can even start my dietbet challenge where you can win money for loosing weight.. Its a great motivator and maybe a good kick start for you.. Congrats on the engagement and good luck.
  • howe2dance
    howe2dance Posts: 1
    This is my 3rd attempt as well. And I'm going through the same problem- I look back at pics from college and wonder why I let it go. I could use support and encouragement as well as I don't have any friends that struggle with this and have no idea what it is like. My husband just decided to start living healthier and that is helping A LOT! I had an issue with thinking I was depriving him since he could eat anything and not gain any weight- so I let mine go. Well no more. :) Congrats to the new day and on your engagement! I look forward to our journey!
  • LoreleiEvil
    LoreleiEvil Posts: 65 Member
    Just echoing PPs. You are worth much more than a number on a scale. You are making an investment in the rest of your life no matter what just by taking action.

    Life isn't a sprint, it's a marathon, the trick is to keep on going. If today is a bad day, tomorrow is a brand new blank slate.
  • cherryd69
    cherryd69 Posts: 340
    This is how i looked when i met my now hubby
    Im the one in the middle.
    224231_1058013976733_3564_n.jpg

    I was a size 16 (UK) and felt fat... i mean really fat..

    This is what i looked like on our honeymoon in Egypt last year. UK size 20.

    376717_4572051905485_1494011664_n.jpg


    Its by no means my biggest, iv been bigger.
    Im trying to get smaller than the first photo.. and i will eventually get there.


    What im tryin to say is, the body constantly changes, everyones does.
    Dont beat yourself up about it.... your here to change, and if you want it hard enough... you will change again.
  • JoanneLJenkins
    JoanneLJenkins Posts: 1
    Hiya everyone!
    I've read your comments and agree with everything that has been said. I am in a similar situation... been with my boyfriend two years and I have put on half a stone. I want it to stop there and I want to loose the half a stone before I go on holiday in August so that I feel confident again! I know it does not sound alot but I lack motivation and have a terrible sweet tooth! My weight doesn't come off easy. Could do with extra motivation if you don't mind me friend requesting you? x
  • cherryd69
    cherryd69 Posts: 340
    Oh an i forgot to add, anyone can friend request me... i dont mind :)
  • futuremrsevers
    futuremrsevers Posts: 39
    I'm in the same boat... I felt so big in high school... but I'd kill to be that size again.

    I'm getting married July 20, 2013, and my wedding dress doesn't fit right now....

    I'm in full on stress/sweat for the wedding mode... I'd love the friendship.

    I'll add ya!
  • Love2Salsa
    Love2Salsa Posts: 11 Member
    Love yourself first. Stay positive...then everything will good will follow.
    Don't hide behind superficial beauty, be good to yourself because you deserve it.
  • hauntao
    hauntao Posts: 130 Member
    I used to be 115 and I'm now in the 170's so I feel you.

    Yayyyy depression.

    Feel free to add!
  • Love2Salsa
    Love2Salsa Posts: 11 Member
    Don't sweat the small stuff! My best girlfriend introduced this site to me when she was preparing for her wedding. She followed through daily and looked stunning in her dress. Don't worry, you have the righ tools, just stick with it. :happy:
  • Love2Salsa
    Love2Salsa Posts: 11 Member
    Having a relationship can make you gain a few and loose some too. wine and dine is the culprit...when dining out just ask the waiter to please take 1/2 of your dish packed in a doggy bag before serving. You are saving yourself from consuming a large portion of the meal.

    portion control.
  • Love2Salsa
    Love2Salsa Posts: 11 Member
    Don't ask...jump in and be a friend! Share you ups and downs. and keep it going!!!
    Don't stop until you get there!!! Don't stop!!! Don't stop even when you've reached your goal! Someone will need your support!
  • mshopey
    mshopey Posts: 125 Member
    Thank you everyone.
    We can all do this.
    To make us healthier and happier people.
  • clobern
    clobern Posts: 341 Member
    Sucks when family brings you down. My grandmother did it for many years. I know she meant well in her heart, she just went about it the wrong way. I wish you the best!
  • kikicooks
    kikicooks Posts: 1,079 Member
    Try not to be so down on yourself & don't worry about what others think. I know, easier said than done. You are not alone, so many of us have been there. It is why most of us are here. :) Do this for yourself, your health, your future. There is so much great support on this site, you've got this! Feel free to friend me.
  • Nano1360
    Nano1360 Posts: 101 Member
    First of all your first date was a total jerk!!!
    Second of all we all have same problem, we gain lots of weight during long period of time!!!!!
    This is what I hate about being a food lover! When you are happy you eat! When you are nervous you eat! When you are depress you eat! ....

    But I also do believe that if we are motivated enough we can lose the weight! maybe a lot harder than the way we gained it but as old saying goes no pain no gain!!!!

    I will commit my self to be the best Pal:heart:
    I will check your diary (if it is public) ,
    Make comments about your choices,
    Message you when you start getting frustrated and want to give up!!!
    Share my knowledge and experience along our journey !!!!

    If you believe you can be the best Pal for me feel free to add me!!!! (Any one who wants a best friend not just a friend feel free to add me) :blushing: :flowerforyou:
  • yacapraro5
    yacapraro5 Posts: 21 Member
    I've definitely gained some weight in the past few years since starting my relationship with my boyfriend. I'd love to have some friends on this journey. Its tough. And I've been struggling with keeping myself motivated to log and exercise. But I know overall I will feel so much better. Maybe not have crazy heartburn all the time. I've done weight watchers and every other diet imaginable. Weight watchers worked for me before they made fruit "free". Then once it was 0 points, I lost my game completely and all I ate was fruit (umm hello fruit has calories too!)
  • awwgereee
    awwgereee Posts: 2
    I've had ups and downs with my weight. I am trying to find a balance with eating and maintaining a healthy weight and loving my body. I would love to add you and have your support as well!!
  • llpaq
    llpaq Posts: 263 Member
    AWWWWW Hun people are going to down talk about ya all the time.,.....Don't listen, it took me about 30 years to learn that, it's easier said than done I know. But it's your time to shine now, FOCUS on just you and NEVER GIVE UP, the two biggest keys to getting to where you want to be.
    Good luck to you and welcome back gorgeous!!!!:flowerforyou:
  • skinnylcs
    skinnylcs Posts: 11 Member
    I'm also starting again and would be glad to join your journey. Perhaps we can all pull for each other :happy:
  • RoRi3
    RoRi3 Posts: 6
    That's my goal , 115
  • StitchHappy8974
    StitchHappy8974 Posts: 3
    I'm also restarting my weight loss goals and would love to be a part of your support team! Congrats on the Engagement and upcoming wedding!! I used to do the same thing. Back in highschool I always felt so much larger than my friends, especially since I was curvy and didn't have the "flat stomach", but when I look back at those days I would LOVE to have that figure back! I might not have had the "flat stomach" but it was much less than what I'm packing these days...and I've learned curves are a girls best friend ;)

    I sent you a friend request already, I say we work together and get ourselves back to those glory days :)
  • bikermike5094
    bikermike5094 Posts: 1,752 Member
    change your mindset....you havent failed...you've had varying degrees of success!
  • alliemarie77
    alliemarie77 Posts: 378 Member
    You can add me as well... I have been in your shoes. I was 115 pounds as a teenager, and I was happiest at 135 after I had my first son.
    I am now 36, and I have let myself go.... My husband has been great, and says he loves me at any size.
    His only regret is that in my losing weight my boobies are going away....lol He says its not a deal breaker though.

    Anyway, I have about 136 pounds left to lose. The most I have ever weighed was 298 pounds last Summer. I had lost 26 pounds, and I quit... It was pure laziness that made me quit, and I went back up to 281.4.

    I started AGAIN 3 weeks ago at 281.4, and have lost 12.4 pounds. My first goal is to lose 50 pounds. I have 38 more pounds to go to reach that goal. Then my goal is to lose 50 more pounds. After that I want to lose 50, and then figure out where I would like to be from there. My ultimate goal is to reach and maintain a healthy weight.

    If I can do this so can you! I literally eat everyday food. Good luck to you!
  • Cindyg87
    Cindyg87 Posts: 2
    Hey, no matter how many times you fail you just keep trying and trying....i am in the same boat.! Add me if you want, we can keep motivated :smile:
  • Brutmar
    Brutmar Posts: 85
    Cheer up honey bunny! You are not alone :) In 2010 I lost 42 lbs and felt wonderful. I was down to a size 12. Not the smallest I've ever been but I was satisfied with the way I looked. In the last two years I have gained 25 of those lbs back! So I started again this month to get it off. Although I am unhappy with myself for gaining it back, I know that my failure is not the end. I'm back at it and I know I can get it off again. You know what? So can you!!! I have faith in ya :).....I am sending a friend request. Together we can succeed! Good luck on your weightloss journey.
  • BEVERLYSTEEN
    BEVERLYSTEEN Posts: 106 Member
    Never quit trying, take one day at a time and know tomorrow is a new day and a new start. We can all look back at pictures of ourselves in days gone by and think about our would-a, could-a and should-a's but the fact remains you are here now and that means you have not given up! Keep coming back to this site even if you stumble because you will get the motivation you need. Good Luck.
  • fluffywelshsheep
    fluffywelshsheep Posts: 26 Member
    Baby step's everyone , Do one thing every day that is a health choices, It's soon be easier to do and become second nature.

    Ditch the diets and change you way you life your life . You need to get it right in your head .

    Just one point is don't look backwards always go forward in life, It's not good to say i want to be the size i was in college, You say i want to be this size/weight in x months/year time and stick to it.

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