How do I stop letting people's comments get to me?

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Replies

  • kimmie185
    kimmie185 Posts: 550 Member
    From personal experience, you are just going to have to ignore them and move on with your healthy progress.

    I can't even begin to describe all the nasty hateful comments I got from friends, family and coworkers when I was losing my weight which is baffling because I always thought people would think losing weight is a good thing. I've even lost friends because they were no longer comfortable hanging around with the new thinner me. My aunt told me once that I needed to stop losing weight because I looked "sick" in the face.

    It's hard, but all you can do is brush them off and move on because this is all about you and your journey, it's not their journey.

    Good luck to you!
  • Hi_Im_Jess
    Hi_Im_Jess Posts: 347 Member
    Surround yourself with better people and remember that the only reason people make negative comments is because their self esteem is so low they want to feel like theyre above someone. Don't let them get to you, I know its easier said than done & we all get our feelings hurt but try not to let jerks upset you. We can lose weight but they will always suck at life!
  • ndj1979
    ndj1979 Posts: 29,136 Member
    tell them you are going to stab them in the face with a soldering iron...works every time for me.
  • ndj1979
    ndj1979 Posts: 29,136 Member
    in all seriousness..my one friend tried to say that instead of being in the gym on Friday and being a "meathead" I should be at the bar drinking for happy hour..I said no thanks, I am good doing deadlifts..then I saw him on the beach on Sunday and said "hmmmm I am crushing deads, and you are crushing 12 ounce curls...who looks more in shape.." Gets em every time..
  • GJRicketts
    GJRicketts Posts: 52 Member
    So you've been making steady progress since May 2012 despite the hurtful comments from co-workers and your Mom? I'd say you won already by not letting them beat you! Every day you don't let them beat you is another day you've beaten them! You're a lot stronger than you give yourself credit for.

    WELL DONE!
  • sugaree1202
    sugaree1202 Posts: 184 Member
    I guess it's too awkward to elaborate, especially since the issue is too redundant. It's the same old story with the overweight individual who gets picked on for having an overweight issue.

    It also sucks that the people who do that are coworkers I have to see every day and my mother. I don't know how they can be so ignorant and insensitive (especially my mother since she knows how much I struggled with this in the past year and have progressed.)

    Thanks

    It's HARD. I've found that the best way is usually to respond as little as possible. If the comment is very rude, I usually just roll my eyes and walk away. If it's a backhanded compliment, I just smile sweetly and say "Thanks!" as if I thought they genuinely meant it as a compliment, then walk away. If they try to tell me I should be doing it differently, I say "Hmm, Interesting. I'll give that proper consideration." And then walk away.

    People who make comments like these are looking for a response. If they get it, they'll continue. They want to get to you. Even if it does bother you, don't let them know it. After a while you'll find that it really doesn't bother you, at least not as much.

    ^exactly what I was going to say - especially smiling and saying thank you like they just said something nice or helpful

    Some people feel better by making others feel worse than them, some people are just mean and like to be mean. Either way, if they don't get a negative reaction from you or you come back at them in a way that says you're not going to ruin my day, they'll find someone else to pick on and eventually the jerky co-worker won't target you to begin with. Moms are tougher, if confronting her hasn't worked, try ending the interaction when she says something mean. A simple "It's time for me to go" followed by hanging up the phone or walking away is all that's needed. Eventually she will realize you leave, end the phone call, walk away, etc, every time she makes a negative comment and will stop or won't spend as much time with you. You tell people how to treat you, don't put up with it.

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