Unhappy and stuck in a rut

Options
skinnyfaye2014
skinnyfaye2014 Posts: 1
in Introduce Yourself
Hi. I started using mfp a week ago because i feel like i tried everything else. I was never skinny but i always had a healthy weight, but after the birth of my first child, i began to gradually gain weight. Six years, two kids later i went from weighing 180 lbs. to 330 lbs.! I'm so embarrassed and ashamed of the weight i gained i became depressed. I don't want to leave the house, it takes alot just to take the kids outside because my daughter would want me to play with her and i'm just too embarrassed. I get so overwhelmed with day to day life i eat and eat (mostly bad foods) to cope with my day. I want so much to be happy and outgoing like i used to be, but right now i just feel stuck.
«1

Replies

  • Sparky1130
    Sparky1130 Posts: 1
    Options
    My wife & I bought Factor 4 and we make a breakfast shake and we're doing pretty well. Lost 15 lbs. in 4 weeks and not starving or really even hungry. And I'm a foodaholic. The shake consists of low fat yogurt (6oz.) 1 med. banana, 1/2 C blueberries, 1 C strawberries, a few ounces of sparkling water and after it's all blended, I add the two scoops of the Factor 4...I also add some ice cubes to make it colder. Started out @ 224 I'm now 209, my goal is 185...Good luck!
  • FitCoachShawn
    FitCoachShawn Posts: 230 Member
    Options
    http://www.myfitnesspal.com/groups/home/14158-lean-on-me
    Great support and motivational group here at MFP! :)
  • xxWaiterxx
    xxWaiterxx Posts: 5 Member
    Options
    This is the right place to be.

    You are here among friends, stick around and you will change your life!

    Welcome aboard.
  • Nano1360
    Nano1360 Posts: 105 Member
    Options
    Hey!
    I wouldn't say being over weight is something that you should feel ashamed about it! But I also get the feeling that you just don't want to go out there and look fat when lots of females are looking fit, hot,etc.
    But lets be honest it is like an endless cycle: the more you stay at home, the more you eat, that also means less active life! And gain even more weight!
    I would be glad to share my journey with you! Just know that you are not a lone! We all feel awkward sometimes, out of place,..!
    Saying all that feel free to add me!
  • FitCoachShawn
    FitCoachShawn Posts: 230 Member
    Options
    http://www.myfitnesspal.com/groups/home/14158-lean-on-me
    Great support and motivational group here at MFP! :)
  • marhod5
    marhod5 Posts: 84 Member
    Options
    I think you are in the right place. I find the food journal helpful and educational. I like to play around with different foods to see what they do to my numbers. The fat and calories in junk food are really shocking! Just seeing the calories in a food would make me not want to eat it. I'm tracking my food and being honest with myself and so far I'm doing well. You can too!
  • MidnightDave
    MidnightDave Posts: 18 Member
    Options
    You're already on your fitness journey to success just by posting and tracking on here. There will be good days and bad, leaps forward and setbacks, and that's okay, it's a journey, maybe a long one, and most importantly, you're on it, right now, this minute forward you are achieving your goal. Another important point, your smile is your best asset--everybody's really, no matter what size or shape, you look better when you smile, so every day, at least once a day, think about that glorious day when you reach your goal, and smile. It will come, remember you're already on your way...
  • Tamm04
    Tamm04 Posts: 182 Member
    Options
    It's great you've joined and want to start losing weight to be a healthier you, and Mom (which is very important). I'm a Mom to two great girls, a wife and used to be a size 22/24. It's hard, but once you start eating healthier and start moving (even taking your daughter to the park and pushing her on the swings is exercise) you'll see results. Those results will motivate you to lose even more! Add me if you'd like. I can always use a new friend on here :)
  • missylee117
    missylee117 Posts: 66 Member
    Options
    We are here to help set you on the right track, keep an open diary and an open mind and watch the weight come off..............:love:
  • anniegail1961
    anniegail1961 Posts: 116
    Options
    Good Morning: Congratulations on taking the first step with MFP.
    May I suggest you spend alot of time in the Success Stories section.
    There is plenty of inspiration and motivation there.
    And they all changed their lives and their health in less than a year.
    But it took a committment on their part-no one else could do it for them.
    May I also suggest brisk walking.
    Put your kids in the stroller-load it up with snacks and toys and diapers etc...and go for an adventure.
    Walk it off! Shake off your defeated attitude.
    You are a strong woman-stuck in a rut.
    It's your choice to stay there or start digging yourself out!
    Just think that by this time next year you could be a totally new woman!!
    Concentrate on the goal-not the problem!!
    And just in case no one has told you in awhile--Being a Mother is the toughest job-but the most rewarding!! And you are AWESOME!!!!
  • Lennonluv2
    Lennonluv2 Posts: 956 Member
    Options
    You can do it! It takes time. It's great you made the first step and joined. You will find many supportive people and groups here. I have been in your shoes and felt what you have. i still get depressed a lot of the time but these days when I feel down I get myself to the gym and end up feeling better, Feel free to add me as a friend, This will work, just try not to be so hard on yourself!
  • FindingTimeForMe
    FindingTimeForMe Posts: 29 Member
    Options
    First step already there -- posting your current situation is always the hardest. Get lots of friends on MFP to track with you. Everytime you want to eat outside of scheduled/planned meals jump on MFP and get in a conversation on community or post how you are feeling to your friends so they can jump on and give you support. Start by saying I will only eat scheduled and planned meals (put a note on your fridge to yourself). Get brave and go out of the house. Your jouney is yours to succeed. Who cares what a neighbor and quite frankly someone you don't know is thinking. I know this is hard - self-esteem and confidence are key elements to your success. If you don't find these qualities it won't matter how you attack the extra weight. You can do this!!!!!!! Add me as a friend if you want. Therese
  • gebe1231
    gebe1231 Posts: 60 Member
    Options
    Hi! I just wanted to let you know that I started here January 2012 at 330 lbs! I'm now down over 110 lbs! I'm not done yet! It's work in progress! It's taken time but I really try to look at food as nutrition like its suppose to be! Trying to eat clean such as fruit, veggies, lean meat...no processed boxed stuff! And I've really found a love of exercise & the benefits of that! You really can do this! And it would be a big benefit to your children as well! Best of luck & feel free to send a friend request! I love to encourage others...it keeps me going too!
  • Diane4life
    Diane4life Posts: 5 Member
    Options
    Hey I've lived your life, done that. I'm 64 years young now and looking back I remember those days. I was born weighing 11 lbs and my life was a tortured existence of being teased and bullied in school, an abusive relationship and marriage, finding myself after the divorce, enjoying life and having fun, and now struggling to lose the weight I gained after I was retired from a job I loved during the last economic downturn.

    Don't give up. Life is worth living, you will lose the weight but don't expect it to happen overnight. Feeling bad about not being able to do things with your kids because of your weight is a burden I understand. But you must get out of the house with them, take them to the park and stroll peacefully, wake up at dawn and take them for a stroll in your neighborhood, let them run wild in the playground and enjoy every moment. Color with them, make silly art projects. Find things they love and encourage them. Take them to the YMCA for swimming lessons, or other appropriate venues.

    And take the time for yourself. Ask a friend to babysit. Get out with girlfriends, or invite them over for a simple lunch or breakfast.
    Treat yourself well. You have to take care of yourself, your kids love you and they want to see you happy. Enjoy each moment with them, they grow too quickly.
  • cupcakes_and_cardio
    cupcakes_and_cardio Posts: 369 Member
    Options
    I hate to see when someone is at such a low point. YOU CAN DO THIS! We are all here to support you. As a mother, you've gotta' do this not only for yourself, but for your children also. I went from being 150 to 202 lbs. It's not easy, but it's no impossible and sometimes, unfortunately, the easiest choice (eating all the time) isn't the best choice. Good luck and if you need anything, I'm here :)
  • bernadettemelvin
    bernadettemelvin Posts: 9
    Options
    hey, don't be depressed. There are a lot of people who are over weight the numbers don't mean anything. The first step is realizing you have a problem. I lost 53 lbs when my oldest daughter was 6 tht was 16 years ago. Since then I went from 140 to 230.... that's almost 100 lbs. Even my fat clothes are tight. Now my health is becoming an issue. I want to lose 80lbs. That's seems like such a high number but my doctor told me not to think like that. Think 5 lbs at a time. That 5lbs would be excellent for my heart health. That's my goal right now. 5lbs. I bet you are a great mom and your kids love you know matter the size. All they see is their mom. Just go day to day. That's what I'm trying to do and hopefully I will learn to like life without french fries, cup cakes and most importantly potato chips.

    Bernadette
  • Lynhira
    Lynhira Posts: 2
    Options
    The hardest part of losing weight most feel is the exercise and all the work they perceive they will have to do to get there. Well yes, it is hard and to lose what we put on will take work however the difference will only come when we take control of our mind. Not in a harsh judgmental way but one of acceptance and understanding of what has to happen. Listen to this video and see if it makes sense. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EqyANuPozAk&feature=youtu.be If it doesn't work go to you tube and type in coach erik.

    Here is what he said that really rang home with me. Make food choices from a position of strength power and love as apposed to willpower judgement and force. Are these food choices serving me or stealing from me? Are you nourishing your body or feeding something else(emotions, anxiety, etc.

    Here is the thing, I once weighed 459 pounds, I have lost over 200 pounds however, I am still now only beginning to get that my mind and my voice are either my ally's or my worst enemy. Its MY choice. Everyone has to reach that point and understand that there is no diet that works, Eating right and exercising are the only way to be healthy but until you CHANGE YOUR MIND, and focus on the positive choices through strengh power and love forever............not just til you get to where you think you look pretty good, that can not be the motivation because its fleeting. You have to want to feel the way exercise makes you feel powerful, change your mind about it being a chore into fun. Do you like dancing? Dance, xbox 360 with kinect using the zumba is what I love to do, I love to garden my yard, that burns tremendous calories. Fitness pal is an awesome tool, put it on your phone, it will teach you just what your putting into your body. Be well my frend and do not be unhappy, CHOOSE to be HAPPY for only in happiness will you make choices that show you love yourself.

    Julia
  • giastu
    giastu Posts: 6
    Options
    You've already taken two steps on your new journey, just keep taking them along the way and you'll be achieving your goal in no time. Don't look at the big picture, break it down into easy to do changes, that will eventually become life changes. This way you're not overwhelming yourself. Take baby steps and work your way up. You will get there. I know for me, whenever I looked at all the weight I had to lose, it overwhelmed me so much, when I stopped looking at it that way, and just did a little at a time, it helped so much and I've learned a lot. I've been counting calories since last July, I'm only down 33lbs, but that is okay! I've learned SO MUCH from taking baby steps. I also am a runner now too, something I never thought I'd do, but by taking it one thing at a time has helped. I've also learned that the scale number means nothing, focus on how your clothes fit is so much more rewarding than the number on the scale. You will get there, hang in there!! Make a list of 5 things you want to "learn" in this, and start there! Then make another 5 and so on.. It will help you get to your goal and learn a lot along the way! You can do this. :)
  • liv2bfree
    liv2bfree Posts: 7 Member
    Options
    Hi. I started using mfp a week ago because i feel like i tried everything else. I was never skinny but i always had a healthy weight, but after the birth of my first child, i began to gradually gain weight. Six years, two kids later i went from weighing 180 lbs. to 330 lbs.! I'm so embarrassed and ashamed of the weight i gained i became depressed. I don't want to leave the house, it takes alot just to take the kids outside because my daughter would want me to play with her and i'm just too embarrassed. I get so overwhelmed with day to day life i eat and eat (mostly bad foods) to cope with my day. I want so much to be happy and outgoing like i used to be, but right now i just feel stuck.

    Hi, I am right there with you. Take small steps, try to make small changes to your eating ... more veggies, fruits, more chicken and fish. Drink that water!!! I understand not wanting to go outside, thinking everyone is staring, making comments. So try 2-3 works outs a week at home. Whether you make it 5-10 minutes, least you are doing something.

    When you are ready to step a foot outside the house, go for a walk, get an iPod, blast your favorite tunes!

    Small steps but you will be so happy and even more motivated as you start seeing the way clothes you wear get more loose, your stamina increases, etc.

    Hide that scale! Measure your body (bust, waist @ belly, hips, thighs). I weigh myself once a week. It's amazing seeing a pound go, or an inch disappear.

    You are strong! You are amazing!!! You got this :o)
  • clarischarlene
    clarischarlene Posts: 9
    Options
    Hi. I started using mfp a week ago because i feel like i tried everything else. I was never skinny but i always had a healthy weight, but after the birth of my first child, i began to gradually gain weight. Six years, two kids later i went from weighing 180 lbs. to 330 lbs.! I'm so embarrassed and ashamed of the weight i gained i became depressed. I don't want to leave the house, it takes alot just to take the kids outside because my daughter would want me to play with her and i'm just too embarrassed. I get so overwhelmed with day to day life i eat and eat (mostly bad foods) to cope with my day. I want so much to be happy and outgoing like i used to be, but right now i just feel stuck.

    Hi, I'm going to be cruel to be kind. You need to stop feeling sorry for yourself. You put yourself in this situation, BUT YOU can take yourself out. You've clearly wrote why you've become this weight. Now motivate yourself for the sake of your health and well being and for your lovely daughter. Do what's right. All the best!

Categories