Truthfully: should I even bother with this site if I refuse
cherdan
Posts: 162 Member
I just joined. This site is basically an extended, easier-to-manage electronic version of what I have been doing every day for the last 9 months to a year- meticulously count calories of everything I consume. It has worked out well for me, especially with my recent addition of a regular exercise plan. Here's the thing- I don't weigh myself. I haven't known my weight in a couple of years- and that was when this *kitten* urgent care doctor screamed at me that I was obese. Nice.
These traumatic past experiences, coupled with my past of extreme anorexia from ages 15-16, make me unable to weigh myself. It literally is psychologically unhealthy for me to. No matter how good the number may be, in my head it always sounds gargantuan. I know if I get on the scale I may begin compulsively starving myself again, or maybe even resort to throwing up. I have a number of psychological issues relating to my weight- PTSD and social anxiety being the main ones.
In the last year I have had my father, who is essentially my unpaid nutritionist/exercise consultant monitor and track my weight loss- visually and from what I eat and do. He has estimated I have lost about 70 lbs so far.
Anyway, my question is: should I continue to use this site if I do not weigh myself? Is it pointless for me to continue? I am diligent at tracking all my calories every day and my exercise, but I am just absolutely adamant about not weighing myself. My BMR on here is based on a rough estimate of my current weight. I know this may not be entirely accurate (I am 5'11", and thus have always looked thinner than my actual weight), but I feel it is close enough. What are your opinions? Please try and be sensitive to the issues I have brought up in my post. Thanks.
These traumatic past experiences, coupled with my past of extreme anorexia from ages 15-16, make me unable to weigh myself. It literally is psychologically unhealthy for me to. No matter how good the number may be, in my head it always sounds gargantuan. I know if I get on the scale I may begin compulsively starving myself again, or maybe even resort to throwing up. I have a number of psychological issues relating to my weight- PTSD and social anxiety being the main ones.
In the last year I have had my father, who is essentially my unpaid nutritionist/exercise consultant monitor and track my weight loss- visually and from what I eat and do. He has estimated I have lost about 70 lbs so far.
Anyway, my question is: should I continue to use this site if I do not weigh myself? Is it pointless for me to continue? I am diligent at tracking all my calories every day and my exercise, but I am just absolutely adamant about not weighing myself. My BMR on here is based on a rough estimate of my current weight. I know this may not be entirely accurate (I am 5'11", and thus have always looked thinner than my actual weight), but I feel it is close enough. What are your opinions? Please try and be sensitive to the issues I have brought up in my post. Thanks.
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Replies
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I say yes, if anything you can keep track a bit easier of how healthy you eat and work out. With or With out weighing yourself, you still have access to everything else MFP offers including the community. Step back and look at the big picture, its more about your general health, not your current weight. Although a lot of people, myself included zone into weight.0
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The number on the scale does not matter, what does matter is that you are healthy. keep up the good job.:happy:0
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I think that MFP is helping you keep track of healthy eating habits! That's wonderful!!!!! Some of us (ME!!!!!!!!!) obsess about the number on the scale. It dictates so many feelings and emotions. A big part of this journey to wellness (both physical and emotional) is finding peace with your body. Good for you for not letting the number on the scale keep you from that! Keep being healthy and happy!0
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Hi,
Well done with your healthy diet and exercise plan. I think it is so great that you have been able to get through what would of been a hard battle with your eating disorder.
i don't think there is any need to weigh yourself if you don't want to.
I do think this is a good tool not just to keep track of your calorie intake but it measures protein, fiber ect, witch is all important for a healthy diet.
Just do what makes you feel comfortable.
Good luck.0 -
I don't use the site to track my weight anymore. As I've stayed the same weight for about 3 months I just don't even bother using the reporting and tracking tools anymore. I weigh myself but that's more for my knowledge then as a visual barometer of how I'm doing.
I use the site simply as a calculating tool for calorie and nutritional count. Not as a whole weight loss program.
It's there for you to do with what you want so if you dont want to use certain things, don't. No one will tell you you can't use the website if you don't weight yourself.0 -
That's what is so great about this site. It's easily adaptable for whatever type of program you choose. Looks like you've already had lots of success without using a scale so use whatever you like from the site and keep it up!
And welcome to MFP!0 -
Honey, you should do whatever is working for "YOU" and whatever makes "YOU" happy! There are so many Quack doctors out there now a days, that I am almost scared to go in for a cold.............lol! You are the one that has to be happy in your body. I really hate my scale and I have seen so many people that are completely obsessed with it.........................you can tell if you have lost weight just by the way your clothes fit, so I say be happy and do what you want.................the hell with the doctor ( he is probably an overweight smoker himself)lolololol!0
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I'm in the same boat - I don't think I should weigh myself anymore. If I don't lose I get depressed. I stop thinking of the good I'm doing for my body and obsess with that number on the scale.
The way I look at it is ... this whole journey started for me because I want to be healthier. If I lose weight as a result, all the better but it shouldn't be my only focus. Realistically I could lose weight eating crap too but that's not what I want. I want my body to run like a well oiled machine - as it is supposed to. I don't want to have to worry about diabetes or heart disease and I don't want to worry about my arthritis robbing me of my life. The only way to do that is to be healthy all around.0 -
I think you can still use it as a tool, I know there are other people on here with similar history that use this site and don't weigh in.
No big deal no one is here to judge you..on if you've lost or whatever..its all about being healthy and thats what you are trying to do. Sounds like you have a great support system and I definitely wouldn't want you to do something which could trigger past behavior that leads to you suffering. and I think if you just use this to track food/exercise and enjoy the forums or whatever you'll be ok. Just be aware of sneaky triggers and stop if you need to. Welcome!0 -
this site is a great tool and makes it easier then writing it down. I have been doing the calories counting for over 5 years and will continue to do it becaue it works and keeps me honest and accountable. Do weigh yourself 1 time a week 1st thing in the morning before you eat generally Friday is a good day.0
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I can empathise with you because for a couple of years I refused to weigh myself but tried to eat healthy and exercise a few times a week. I'd use how clothes fit me as my measure (I didn't really think to use inches, for some reason). I read your profile and it looks like you're doing absolutely everything right for a healthy lifestyle. In terms of weighing yourself, I think you should aim to work up to it. I understand that you can't do it at the moment for perfectly good reasons so perhaps research the healthy (perhaps in terms of BMI) weight for your height, talk to you dad about when might be a comfortable time to weigh yourself - a time when it won't show you something to be afraid of, perhaps. It's just like any other fear or worry - for example with heights.. baby steps and you can overcome it
You've got hundreds of people here who are open minded and here to support you 0 -
Thank you everyone for all the supportive comments! This seems like a really nice community.0
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Hi,
I think you should do what works for you.
Clearly what you are doing now is working for you!
Hats off to you and your Dad!, he's been a great support.
If counting/recording the calories on MFP is easier then use it, there are added benefits in calculating the balance of the nutional facts to ensure that you are eating healthy.
If you find the MFP community supportive and inspriational (like I do), then use it.
You are very brave and have made great progress keep it going.0 -
Most definitely! If you keep doing what you are doing it is obviously working! Doctors are good but they aren't perfect and don't know everything. I say you are doing GREAT!!!!! Keep up the good work!!!0
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If you feel like getting on the scale would be unhealthy for your well-being, then don't do it. But I don't think that means that you can't use this site and take advantage of what it offers. I haven't changed my weight for a month now, but I'm still counting calories, adding my exercise, seeing if I'm getting enough protein and iron, using the forums and getting wonderful advice and feedback.
I think you will find this site very advantageous even without monitoring your weight. There are so many other things this site offers rather than just a tool of tracking your weight loss. You just do what makes you feel good and what works for you!0 -
I'm there with you. I cannot weigh myself regularly. It's an addiction and set me up for all sorts of other things, like binges. But I still use this site.
So much gets emphasized on weight, when really, weight isn't the best thing to go off of. There are so many things that factor into what we weigh that I have decided its pretty much a bs number anyway. I do what you do, for the most part. See how my clothes are, eat healthy, and use this place for support and ideas. If I knew I could handle it, I'd measure occasionally and keep track of body fat %, but I can't say that it wouldn't affect me the same way as weighing would. In the end, the point is to be healthy, right?
You have to keep in mind that you are in control and this is just another set tools for you to have a healthy life. You don't have to use every tool in your tool box to get a job done well. If tracking calories is the only tool you are comfortable using, then use that. Don't let someone else force you into doing something else you know is going to mess you up, you've come way too far to let that happen. 0 -
You are doing what works for you and you are taking care of yourself. Doctors are human and fallible and that means they can be wrong sometimes. You have done great things in changing your lifestyle to a healthy one and kudo's to your dad for helping you.0
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This site is available for people from all walks of life. You can either go at it alone and just use the logs, join support groups or choose to have friend following so you can have someone to critique and keep you motivated. Sounds like the only thing you need is the electronic exercise and calorie tracker. That is fine and you can do this alone with your dad watching over you as you mentioned.
You are not here to please us. This is for you. I hope you are under the care of a psychologist or psychiatrist so they can properly manage those things you mentioned in hopes that one day you will overcome the biggest obstacle in your life, you.0 -
just wanted to add my support.
it sounds like you're doing great, and it's really positive that you're able to recognise what will and won't work for you and work around the bits that are likely to cause you trouble. it sounds like you know yourself.
in my opinion there is absolutely no reason why you'd need to weigh yourself. it's a convenient indicator of how you're going, but it's really only a number that represents one facet of your overall health.
I want to congratulate you on getting control of your life. I can only imagine how difficult it must be to get yourself back to a healthy body without falling back into old habits. I really hope MFP can help you to achieve your goals, and like everyone else, I think you'll find that the site has plenty to offer you despite you choosing not to weigh yourself.
Wishing you all the best,
misssusieq0 -
You are one brave sensible lady & you will find so much support here if you weigh yourself or not.. It is not just about those numbers on the scales but, as many have said, a healthier lifestyle & that means mind & body. Just keep up the good work because it will make you healthier, more energetic & more confident. You are a wonderful person & you deserve this & so lucky to have such an understanding dad that I am sure you will achieve all your aims & peace of mind. Feel free to befriend me for mutual support & good luck.0
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i just read your profile and I wanted to add that I hope you're travelling this road with some proper professional help. as someone with a history of an eating disorder I know all too well how easy it is to cross the line from 'in control' to 'think I'm in control'.
Please be well and take care.0 -
I think you should speak with your therapist to see if this site is good for you. If you have had an eating disorder in the past it's very important that you do not go back to that and if this site will trigger any old feelings then you shouldn't use it. Eating disorders are are extremely dangerous and can be deadly and it's better that you stay mentally healthy.0
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I hardly evey weigh myself.. I get depressed if it isn't what i expected.
Will it be too much to blindfold yourself and let your dad see what you weigh and then he will keep track... Just a suggestion. If not keep doing what you're doing. I think it's easier and more fun to come here and track your calories. :flowerforyou:
I think as long as you feel good and see a change in the fit of your clothes, I don't really see a need to weigh yourself.
Best wishes!0 -
Do whatever you are comfortable with! Are you measuring your inches or tracking pant sizes to see your progress? For me, I needed that weekly weigh in to account for all of my hard work & have incentive to go at it again the next week. It also gave me a visual to associate with my progress since my personal image didn't change as quickly as my numbers. I had a great deal more to lose than you, though, so I say, do what suits you best! Good luck :flowerforyou:0
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I have to agree with everyone else. This site is supposed to help you get healthy. If stepping on a scale can send you into an emotional downward spiral that could ruin your health - best not to do it. Tracking healthy eating and exercise is the most important part. The weightloss will come with that.
I can sympathize as to the weight seeming high, because being tall can do that. My goal weight, since I am about 5'10" is some women's starting weight! But it is right in the middle of my healthy BMI scale.
One thing to keep in mind is that your BMR will change with significant weightloss. So maybe keep your father on the alert to remind you that if you appear to have lost more weight (maybe 15 lbs or so) to re-enter that estimate into MFP so it can recalculate your goals. But you certainly have to do no actual weighing.
Good luck and congrats on your SIGNIFICANT success so far!0 -
JL, thank you for bringing up a valid and very relevant point. I am 5'11" and for me a weight of 170 would be ideal, I think. But BMI says 155-170, and anything over is "overweight"?? Bollocks. This doesn't take into account women of a larger frame, like myself. People have already been telling me I'm getting too thin. But the numbers still eat at me at the end of the day. I also am pear-shaped and while I may have a thin upper torso, I have a lot of toning up to do below. I just feel the number never matches how I look or feel.0
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How about if you just enter 165 to the site and forget the whole weight-in part.
Theoretically, if you started eating the maintenance calories, the site suggest for 165, your weight should eventually settle around there.
It might take quite a bit more time thought so Personally I would eat a couple hundred Cals less to speed things up.0 -
Hey there, and welcome!
I think, that apart from the value to be had from the calorie counter, and as a nutritional tracking device, the best thing about this site is the community. It is great to be amongst so many supportive, positive people, especially on days when you feel completely demotivated. So stay, and enjoy being amongst friends,
Judy0
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