My parents and my fitness.

freyaheart
freyaheart Posts: 220 Member
in Motivation and Support
IT seems they are fighting me every step of the way. I don't live with them anymore but anytime I bring up the subject they tell me thinks like:

"You'll get hurt if you do a 5K"
This will be the second one I am doing and it is not as difficult, less hills.

"You don't need every new gadget. You'll be sick of it (a hrm) in two months."
Yes because it's a new gameboy game and I'm 8

"It's good that you are counting your calories but you don't have to be so serious about it"
Because milkshakes are so good for me.....

"Don't run! You will destroy your knees!"
.....Don't even get me started

And so on and so forth

I think I just want to give up talking to her about these things and just let my results speak form themselves and when she asks me how I did it I'll just have to say "I did everything you told me not to do."

Edit: This mostly highlights my mother but my father is 100% on her side and says pretty much the same things.

Replies

  • freyaheart
    freyaheart Posts: 220 Member
    I think talking to my family about fitness is like asking Taco Bell how to make a salad......
  • MrsWells1983
    MrsWells1983 Posts: 160

    I think I just want to give up talking to her about these things and just let my results speak form themselves and when she asks me how I did it I'll just have to say "I did everything you told me not to do."

    ^^^This!

    I think you know what to do. Just smile and nod. Do it your way and YES let the results speak for themselves! Keep up the good work!

    xx
  • lizzane
    lizzane Posts: 30 Member
    I think talking to my family about fitness is like asking Taco Bell how to make a salad......

    feel the same with my dad :p
    I know is out of his concern that I will get hurt
    and he is not used to see me so active in exercise and eating so little (compare to before...I'm actually eating pretty good right now :p)
  • gracetillman
    gracetillman Posts: 190 Member
    I decided that I was not going to share my choices regarding health and fitness with anyone else in my life -- outside of my immediate family for whom I cook on a daily basis. They obviously noticed we are eating healthier now but all they know is I am changing our food to be less processed, organic, and healthier.

    I haven't mentioned a pound lost and I exercise on my own time in my own way.

    This is about you -- NOT them -- do what you know needs to be done.
  • UrnAsh
    UrnAsh Posts: 207 Member

    I think I just want to give up talking to her about these things and just let my results speak form themselves and when she asks me how I did it I'll just have to say "I did everything you told me not to do."

    ^^^This!

    I think you know what to do. Just smile and nod. Do it your way and YES let the results speak for themselves! Keep up the good work!

    xx


    Yep, this. Keep up the awesome work OP and don't let others get you down.
  • michellekicks
    michellekicks Posts: 3,624 Member
    They love you. They think of you as part of them... they are having a hard time trusting you can and will make good decisions. They just want what's best for you but you're engaging in things they don't understand.

    Reassure them that you're making educated decisions. Look them in the eye, give them hugs and kisses and tell them to trust you.

    Then show them...
  • lalonmeg000
    lalonmeg000 Posts: 276 Member
    I have learned in my experience that my parents are quick to judge me on things they don't understand or are jealous of. For instance I was in trouble all of Christmas break for making my own dinners rather than eating fast food with the family. I even offered to cook for everyone but was told to stop showing off.... :/

    I stuck to my plan and now they all want to know my "secret"....weeeelllllll

    Keep with it, and as annoying and sometimes even hurtful, as it is, eventually they will realize you don't really care about their opinion on this, and will quiet down a bit. Good luck!
  • girlykate143
    girlykate143 Posts: 220 Member
    I think talking to my family about fitness is like asking Taco Bell how to make a salad......
    I heart you for this. And for the runnings without hurtings. :)
  • poohpoohpeapod
    poohpoohpeapod Posts: 776 Member
    How old are you?
  • artex1024
    artex1024 Posts: 119 Member
    Family can be your weakest supporters sometimes and it sucks! Especially when you want them to be proud and they either criticize or don't care. We feel your pain. All you can do is ignore them and try to find a network of people who DO support you.
  • freyaheart
    freyaheart Posts: 220 Member
    How old are you?

    25, i moved out when I was 22 and I think they still see me as an 8 year old...
  • TheStephil
    TheStephil Posts: 858 Member
    My family was the same way in the beginning but now they see how much happier I am and how excited I get over fitness like things (5k). After going to my 5k this past weekend my uncle, brother and mom all want to do a 5k together soon. Both my brothers and my uncle have joined MFP. My mom is considering it. My other uncle has joined WW and has joined a nearby gym.

    I didn't really bring it up to them unless they asked. They figured something was up when I would skip dessert, bring extra fruit and salads and bring my food scale with me. At first they told me not to waste my money on food scales, my bodymedia, fitbit, etc. but then they saw it wasn't a fad and I was sticking with it. I've never had much to lose so my results aren't very obvious but my happiness has increased tenfold.
  • twinkiemon
    twinkiemon Posts: 216 Member

    "You'll get hurt if you do a 5K"
    This will be the second one I am doing and it is not as difficult, less hills.

    Haha, please - I was about 270 lbs when I did my first one - a mud run with military based obstacles and I came out unscathed (physically, mentally I did feel pretty beat down because it did rub in just how out of shape I was) - just very dirty. Never doing a mud run again, for sure, but would totally do a regular 5K.

    My parents, well, my mom for sure, is the same way - rather, she IS supportive but not in the way she should be. She's the type that's like "You shouldn't eat that" or "that's a big lunch" - never mind that I burned 800 calories on the elliptical. Now that I've showed I'm serious about it though, she's kind of backing off - hopefully this will happen in your situation too. She's pretty much just changed her tune recently though after I lost 32 lbs and I think she realized "Okay, well, my daughter is actually in this for the long haul."
  • freyaheart
    freyaheart Posts: 220 Member
    My family was the same way in the beginning but now they see how much happier I am and how excited I get over fitness like things (5k). After going to my 5k this past weekend my uncle, brother and mom all want to do a 5k together soon. Both my brothers and my uncle have joined MFP. My mom is considering it. My other uncle has joined WW and has joined a nearby gym.

    I didn't really bring it up to them unless they asked. They figured something was up when I would skip dessert, bring extra fruit and salads and bring my food scale with me. At first they told me not to waste my money on food scales, my bodymedia, fitbit, etc. but then they saw it wasn't a fad and I was sticking with it. I've never had much to lose so my results aren't very obvious but my happiness has increased tenfold.

    The thing that really got me to post about this is the gadget thing. We were at Best Buy today killing time and I was talking about the two different HRMs I am thinking about getting but can't quite narrow it down. It's between the Scosche Rhythm and the Wahoo BlueHR. I wanted her opinion. Her opinion was that I don't need to waste my money, I will stop using it, it will chafe, ect.
  • LordBear
    LordBear Posts: 239 Member
    really..tacos and salad in same sentence... now im craving taco salad..well more like nachos since unless its olive veggies dont belong with taco stuff..lol.. but to the topic... my mom is supportive which is great since we share a plate.. my dad on the other hand dont give a chit and he and his gf are always trying to feed me crap. just got to step up and tell them the way it is..and they will probably ignore you so you should just not bring the topic up and ignore them or stay away from them if it is that bad if it is affecting your choices.
  • Bufite
    Bufite Posts: 55 Member
    My mother told my boyfriend I wasn't going to make it round a half marathon because "of all the extra weight". Nice.

    I did make it. So ner.

    Parents!!!
  • yourenotmine
    yourenotmine Posts: 645 Member
    Talk to your friends about the 5K. Talk to your parents about other stuff that doesn't upset them.

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