what do i do

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rAc_hEl
rAc_hEl Posts: 246 Member
i was talking to my fiance's ex girlfriend (i had to ask her something) and i told my fiance and he wasnt mad he told her she could add him on facebook and she did. she added both of us. they talk sometimes but not too much. but thats not what bothers me what bothers me is he once asked her to marry him and thats what bothers me and she still has the ring! he tells me its nothing anymore but i just rather they dont talk! am i being crazy? ive asked her to remove her but he wont :(

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  • LonLB
    LonLB Posts: 1,126 Member
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    Was his penis in her?

    Then ya, he probably shouldn't be talking to her anymore.
  • DalekBrittany
    DalekBrittany Posts: 1,748 Member
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    I don't get that logic. I am free to talk to whomever I please, including ex boyfriends, though I choose not to. If she still has the ring, that may be within her right depending on the state. A lot of states have laws that state that once it is accepted, even if they break up, it belongs to the person it was given to. Others state that engagement is a mutual contract, and the ring is a symbol of it, so when the contract is broken, the ring must be returned. ETA, assuming you're in the states. Which I am guessing you are.

    Maybe he won't remove her because I assume he's a grown *kitten* man and doesn't feel like he should have to remove a friend that YOU initiated contact with in the first place. If he is not hiding things from you, chances are you're being too sensitive.
  • gonnamakeanewaccount
    gonnamakeanewaccount Posts: 642 Member
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    I don't get that logic. I am free to talk to whomever I please, including ex boyfriends, though I choose not to. If she still has the ring, that may be within her right depending on the state. A lot of states have laws that state that once it is accepted, even if they break up, it belongs to the person it was given to. Others state that engagement is a mutual contract, and the ring is a symbol of it, so when the contract is broken, the ring must be returned. ETA, assuming you're in the states. Which I am guessing you are.

    Maybe he won't remove her because I assume he's a grown *kitten* man and doesn't feel like he should have to remove a friend that YOU initiated contact with in the first place. If he is not hiding things from you, chances are you're being too sensitive.

    Yeah, I'm going to have to agree. You're the one who initiated contact with her in the first place which caused her to add the both of you on Facebook. I can't imagine what you just HAD to ask her, but this is the outcome of it.
  • whierd
    whierd Posts: 14,025 Member
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    So you're jealous even though he has given you no reason to be?

    If you think that he is such a *kitten* to where he would cheat on you with his ex girlfriend then you need to break up now and find a guy that you think won't do that.
  • PeanutButterLuver
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    Why would you accept a FB friend request? I wouldn't want his ex knowing my business.
    I think he still wants to bang her. Sorry sweetie.
  • CrankMeUp
    CrankMeUp Posts: 2,860 Member
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    huh?
  • whierd
    whierd Posts: 14,025 Member
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    Why would you accept a FB friend request? I wouldn't want his ex knowing my business.
    I think he still wants to bang her. Sorry sweetie.

    I disagree that he automatically wants to bang her. I am friends with my exes.
  • SoViLicious
    SoViLicious Posts: 2,633 Member
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    i was talking to my fiance's ex girlfriend (i had to ask her something) and i told my fiance and he wasnt mad he told her she could add him on facebook and she did. she added both of us. they talk sometimes but not too much. but thats not what bothers me what bothers me is he once asked her to marry him and thats what bothers me and she still has the ring! he tells me its nothing anymore but i just rather they dont talk! am i being crazy? ive asked her to remove her but he wont :(

    Please do not borrow problems. There is nothing going on, and if there were you could not stop it. So just be happy and wait until he proves that he cannot be trusted.
  • DavPul
    DavPul Posts: 61,406 Member
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    Why would you accept a FB friend request? I wouldn't want his ex knowing my business.
    I think he still wants to bang her. Sorry sweetie.

    I disagree that he automatically wants to bang her. I am friends with my exes.

    only because you're still banging them
  • whierd
    whierd Posts: 14,025 Member
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    Why would you accept a FB friend request? I wouldn't want his ex knowing my business.
    I think he still wants to bang her. Sorry sweetie.

    I disagree that he automatically wants to bang her. I am friends with my exes.

    only because you're still banging them

    That isn't the point!
  • Cp731
    Cp731 Posts: 3,195 Member
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    I had an ex that I stayed friends with.
    I was the one who broke it off
    We went our separate ways for awhile.
    Somehow he would always return by text or email
    He was just one of those guys that kinda didn't hold a grudge that It didn't work out. (or so I thought)
    We remained friends on and off for awhile.
    There was never any sexual contact, no flirting by me ever.
    Later on I learned that he was trying to hold onto me and was willing to be my friend in hopes I'd reconsider.
    He even introduced me to his females friends. Who hated me btw
    He finally confessed to me he was still in love with me
    I never reconsidered. After about 4 years, he finally moved on.
    Just saying.
  • debbash68
    debbash68 Posts: 981 Member
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    What was the question again? ..........t
  • BeachGingerOnTheRocks
    BeachGingerOnTheRocks Posts: 3,927 Member
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    He's going to talk to thousands of different women in your first year of marriage. Some he's dated even. If you freak out or believe that he can't maintain some level of self control, then it is a good idea to hold off on marriage until you don't freak out about it or you believe he can maintain some level of self control, whichever happens first.
  • feral_teddybear
    feral_teddybear Posts: 39 Member
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    He's going to talk to thousands of different women in your first year of marriage. Some he's dated even. If you freak out or believe that he can't maintain some level of self control, then it is a good idea to hold off on marriage until you don't freak out about it or you believe he can maintain some level of self control, whichever happens first.

    Agree. If the boy has no control and thinks with his little head then maybe you shouldn't marry him. From personal experience it took a while for my wife to realize this when i still talked to my ex wife (until ex removed me and moved away)
  • MyChocolateDiet
    MyChocolateDiet Posts: 22,281 Member
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    Small-kitten-chasing-its-tail-do-not-know-the-cat-will-dizziness-it.gif
  • tehboxingkitteh
    tehboxingkitteh Posts: 1,574 Member
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    It's okay for you to befriend her, but he can't remain friends with her?

    If you're that untrusting, or think he's untrustworthy, then it's bound to fail.

    It is possible to remain friends with an ex where it means nothing more than being friends.
  • NormInv
    NormInv Posts: 3,303 Member
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    Being young - crazy
    Being on facebook - insane
    Being young and being on facebook - criminal

    Being young, having facebook and having a BF with an ex you talk to - priceless for the rest of us, but sucks for you.
  • u_mad_bro
    u_mad_bro Posts: 42 Member
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    May I suggest a threesome? Maybe even a sister wives kinda deal?
  • SteelySunshine
    SteelySunshine Posts: 1,092 Member
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    Small-kitten-chasing-its-tail-do-not-know-the-cat-will-dizziness-it.gif

    This. He talks to an ex but not very much and it doesn't bother you. But, what does bother you is that they talk.