Starting all over is so hard to do... My story

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boehle
boehle Posts: 5,062 Member
in Motivation and Support
Good Morning to some and Good Evening to others.
Most of my family is/has always been on the "thicker" side.
Its like a constant battle.
I decided in September 2011 that I was really going to become healthy and fit.
I did so well the first few months. I lost 30lbs.
In January 2012, I met the man that I thought I would marry.
We moved in together in September 2012.
I began putting some weight back on....
We began to really having issues of February 2013 when I found on his computer that he was talking to women online, A LOT.
I kicked him out for a few days and he came back.
We agreed that he would do some therapy and then we would do it together...
In April, he got real distant again, so I logged into his Verizon account.
I found a ton of phone calls and texts from girls out of state.
I kicked him out again...After calling each and every one of those girls and leaving nasty voicemails.
I was beyond hurt..
He sweet talked me and said we should live apart and do therapy.
I kept reminding him of the therapy he promised and he never moved on.
So because I love/d him so much, I made a therapy appt.
He acted sick all day and I cancelled the appt.
I barely ate for weeks and still having issues with having an appetite.
I moved out today and back in with my parents.
Being in the condo that we were renting was too depressing.
I NEED to focus on me and I NEED HELP.
My mom got me an elliptical that I plan to use every morning and evening.
I will start this Monday, I am completely sore from moving to start tomorrow, I need a little rest time...

Soooo... if you'd like a new friend to help motivate and motivate you.. I AM HERE.
I am down to being 19 lbs lost and I really would like to lose another 70 lbs.

Replies

  • jinna86
    jinna86 Posts: 93
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    You can add me as a friend! And it sounds like you need to cut that guy out of your life completely. He sounds really manipulative
  • brandimacleod
    brandimacleod Posts: 368 Member
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    I am already your friend but I am so glad that you made the move. It might feel like a setback today, but this really is a step forward, a step towards the woman you want to be and the life you deserve. I am so proud of you!
  • LadyDevannia
    LadyDevannia Posts: 12 Member
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    I know just what your feeling... My family are all on that thicker side too.. 4 years ago I was around 425 lbs and came to a conclusion I needed to get healthy. I worked my but off Went from that highest weight down to 260, I know I had a lot to go but I was feeling really good about myself. Then I met this great guy and fell in love. We were together a year and he asked to marry him.. I was very happy. Well, then a few months into our engagement I found out he was cheating with an old friend from high school. We split up but I was crushed.. I have gained a lot of my weight back..But ,I did it once and I know with that hard work I can and will do it again. And I am meeting fellow warriors here on MFP and together we will succeed! Would love to have you as a friend !!! Take care and Never give up!
  • violettatx
    violettatx Posts: 230 Member
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    You can add me as a friend if you want. I know from experience if someone is addicted to something (in my ex's case it was alcohol), if you try and try to help them and they refuse help or play games surrounding the issue, it is not worth it. You are worth more than that!

    Congrats on losing the 19 lbs. Keep up the good work...you can do this!
  • StrawberryThief
    StrawberryThief Posts: 115
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    I think you should get some therapy on your own.
    It's interesting that a man you were with for such a relatively short amount of time is having such a colossal effect on your mental wellbeing. It sounds like it could be a catalyst or an object of expression for a problem that was there before... Maybe some self esteem issues.
    Work on your mind and body at the same time; they're very closely linked.
    Good luck x
  • PlayerHatinDogooder
    PlayerHatinDogooder Posts: 1,018 Member
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    So you let the man who does this to you on a regular basis back into your life but think it's appropriate to call up the women and yell at them?

    Am I the only one who thinks this makes NO sense?

    And for the record your Ex isn't 'addicted to anything.

    He's just a d***head.
  • Moonladee
    Moonladee Posts: 77 Member
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    Ok... First.. Julie, love you! We all have had Sh!ts in our lives.. Sometimes they're just harder to flush then others. :) I'm here for you love..

    As to the people on the forum.. Be kind please... before you write your opinions.. Thank you.. :)
  • cantjustcant
    cantjustcant Posts: 1,027 Member
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    I have walked this journey with you my dear. And yes I called the girls on his "wish list". I am so proud of you for standing up for you! Stand tall and know that you did the right thing for you and your son. He doesn't deserve you! Big hugs and kisses. You've got my number anytime you want to talk.
  • nicheven
    nicheven Posts: 77 Member
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    My ex bf did something similar to me, so I kicked his *** out, and went to the therapy on my own. It helped my to sort things out, and then I started over with everything. I met my (now) husband shortly after and we've been married for 3 wonderful years.

    Don't let the stupidhead get you down, there will be someone, somewhere who is waiting to treat you like a princess and when you find him, you'll be a better person too :D
  • May63
    May63 Posts: 162
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    Glad we are already fitness pals. It is very hard for me just dealing with weightloss. I have a big family that is is very close and we get together for everything. I cant control not eating at get togethers. I cant run and burn 800 calories so i can enjoy anticipated food at get together. I haven't had a relationship with some one I love in years. I live with a Male roommate who is 20 yrs older than me.We are very different and he gets to me and i try not to eat my feelings away i get out and go for a walk. You are much stronger than you think. Keeo it up. I am here if you need me. just message me.

    oh and i cant get the morning thing going either. lets work on that,

    Maryann
  • May63
    May63 Posts: 162
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    I am already your friend but I am so glad that you made the move. It might feel like a setback today, but this really is a step forward, a step towards the woman you want to be and the life you deserve. I am so proud of you!

    agreed!!!!!
  • Shirlls123
    Shirlls123 Posts: 65 Member
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    I am sorry to hear about your ex, he sounds a total waste of space, you deserve much better than that! Feel free to add me as a friend for support and encouragement x
  • 88meli88
    88meli88 Posts: 238 Member
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    You did the right thing. Well done. Now, focus on you!

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