Lost almost 100 lbs and gained it all back+!
Replies
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Heidi,
I lost 30 pounds, fell off the wagon and over about 10 years gained it all back... plus an additional 20.
Now 45 years old, I started to feel a sense of urgency. Losing the weight wasn't going to get any easier as I got older. So maybe I'd be 50+ pounds overweight the rest of my life. Then a friend of mine nearly died from weight-related issues (high blood pressure, diabetes). He actually went into cardiac arrest and was resuscitated.
So I decided THIS was my opportunity. RIGHT NOW (just like the Van Halen song that I have on my workout playlist). I lost 40 pounds in 4 months, slowed down a little to regain some muscle and am now down 48 and close to my ideal weight.
I wish I could communicate how awesome it feels. If I woke up tomorrow to discover it was all a dream and I still had 50 pounds to lose, I would get up and go to the gym to lose the weight so I could feel this awesome again.
Start right now and make it happen. This is your life we're talking about.0 -
Hi, my name is Heidi. I am new here, but not to My Fitness Pal. I am 41 years old and have struggled with obesity since childhood. A few years back I decided to get help and was diagnosed with binge eating disorder and bulimia (from years of laxative and "cleanse" abuse). I was put on the medications Topamax and phentramine. I was on a diet program called HMR, and saw a dietician once a week in group sessions with other obese patients, some of whom were prepping for weight loss surgery but had to lose some weight first. I lost 96 lbs over 2 years (down to 193 from 289) and was 28 lbs away from my goal weight (165) when I relapsed and gained it all back plus almost 20 lbs more with a year's time. I am now at 308 lbs, the heaviest I have ever been.
My biggest challenge now is my lack of motivation to "do it all again" - all of the hard work, with the chance that I may just gain it all back yet again plus even more. It was such, such hard work, both physically and emotionally and I am just DREADING doing it again, if I am just going to end up back here again. I honestly don't know if I can handle that type of failure. I am just wondering if anyone else has gone through this and if so, how did you overcome it? Some words of inspiration would be much appreciated and once I am back on the wagon, I will be a great motivator in return, as I once was. Thank you everyone! - Heidi
You obviously are ready to do it. You already know it is possible. Start today. Go outside and go for a walk. It will keep you away from food and burn calories (oh yes and the sunshine will help your mood!)0 -
All I can say is log everything. It is the only way you will realize what you are eating and hopefully cut down with time.0
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I haven't read all the comments so this might already be in there, but you've obviously done it once before so you can do it again. Time will still go on whether or not you get help and lose the weight, but the heavier your are the most it will suck. You lose so much of your life being overweight - don't be that person.0
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Strategies to lose weight in a healthy, permanent way:
1) Lose slowly. Studies show that a max of 1-3 pounds a week lost has the lowest relapse rate.
2) Make permanent lifestyle changes. In other words, refuse to diet. Instead, acquire the habits of a lean person.
3) Make this your mantra: "I refuse to do anything to lose weight that I am not willing to do the rest of my life to maintain it." This means that drastic cuts in calories is OUT. Exercising 6 times a week for 2 hours is OUT. Learn to lose in a slow, balanced, sustainable way. Acquire eating and exercising habits that are moderate, balanced, and sustainable for you.
4) Learn everything you can about calories, exercise, losing weight, how to have a lean, healthy lifestyle, etc. You have mastered how to be a fat person. Now get busy learning the skills, knowledge, and strategies of how to be a lean person. There is no single strategy, no magic bullet. But there is a lot of knowledge and skills that you need to acquire.
5) Forgive yourself. If you are full of self-loathing and blame, you will be susceptible to counter-productive behaviors such as flagellating yourself with over-exercising, punishing yourself with under-eating, and giving up on yourself by "throwing in the towel" at the smallest mistake. It's not the end of the world that you got overweight. It happens. (Look around you in MFP: you are not alone! :flowerforyou: )
6) Get support. You are in the right place! There are lots of great people here. Study the forums, find the ones with positive attitudes and a balanced, productive approach to weight loss. Get on their friend list. If you find someone on your friend list who is toxic and extreme, don't be afraid to delete them. They say that you are the average of the six people closest to you. Surround yourself with people who are where you want to be!
7) Keep yourself inspired. We all get down at times. Read the Success Stories thread often. :glasses:
Best of luck to you on your journey!
Couldn't have said it any better. Feel free to add me, I love to give feedback (and to receive too).0 -
You can be my new BFF. I would have to think hard, but I think I have gained 100+ lbs that I lost at least 3 times now? And this is all in the past few years. Talk about YO-YO! I just got put on Topamax on Friday for Night time binging. So far two days of not eating in the middle of the night. Woo. I will send a friend request right now. :-)0
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Hi, Heidi. Though I wasn't 100 pounds+ overweight, I do know what it's like to have an eating disorder and to struggle with body image and weight. The most I gained was 60 pounds in 9 months. At one time (when I was a teenager) I was put on Imipramine. It "helped" but I didn't want to be dependent on medication as I wanted a permanent, natural solution to my issues.
With that said, here are a few of the things I have found that helped me.
1. I had to let go of the scale and the numbers on the scale. The more I stayed OFF the scale, the healthier my attitude was toward myself and life. And the more my weight normalized. At age 47, I bounce between 110 and 114 pounds. (I'm 5'3".) I weigh myself once a month.
2. I had to look at making lifestyle changes. Because they are lifestyle changes, I allowed myself to take baby steps. For example, if you drink 15 cokes a day reduce to 14 cokes a day and do that for a week or two, keeping everything else the same. Then take the next step. Another example of a baby step: Allow yourself to eat what you want and as much as you want, as long as it's "whole food" (meaning, it doesn't come in a package that needs preparation and isn't fast food): simply proteins, fruits, vegetables, nuts, healthy oils (butter - though some will disagree with this, olive oil, hemp oil, flax oil, olive oil). What I'm saying is YOU decide on the one (and ONLY ONE) thing you want or feel you can do and then do that. It's too overwhelming to slam in a complete overhaul.0 -
You're definitely not alone. I've been a member for 3 years now. My first year I lost 50lbs and I felt awesome. I decided to take a few months off which ended being a year long break. I started school last Fall and came up with every excuse not to exercise or why I couldn't control my portion size. I gained back 32lbs and I felt so horrible about myself. I made a promise to myself that once Spring semester was done I would get back to where I was starting to feel good about myself again. I've lost 8 pounds since May 2nd- no more excuses! You have to WANT it it bad enough to succeed. Start logging your food and go from there. Good luck to you!0
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GREAT advice here! :happy:0
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I did some research recently and came to know that phenthramine (trade name "Duromine' )is known to do that. Its very effective for rapid weightloss, but is addictive and once you are off it... u gain every pound back again. Besides..... it really must have led u throught heavy sleeplessness, loss of appetite and blottedness.
http://www.bellybelly.com.au/forums/f175/anyone-used-duromine-tablets-lose-weight-65260/
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Phentermine
I hope the above link will serve as a reference when u decide on giving it a try again.
As for me... am on a long weightloss journey myself with 50 kgs to lose and yes.. I also have a tendency to put on lost weight. And I often lose hope for a long time after that... only to find that I have further fattened. Had I atleast maintained the exercise or diet.. I would be able to control the pileup. Also, the system nearly crashes when a lot of weight is gained suddenly .. like when I had regained 10 kgs in a month, my system just refused and gave me high bp and leg cramps when I went to g
ym.
I think.. the only way out of this is yo-yo syndrome is persistence - not just till u reach the goal weight but even after that and not let even one week pass by without keeping track of weight.
Currently, lost 6 kgs after 3 months efforts. (Slow but steady). And I taste freedom. I have resolved to continue till the rest of my life so that I will never be prey to this yo yo syndrome and reap the benefits of staying healthy throughout life.0 -
GREAT advice here! :happy:0
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Strategies to lose weight in a healthy, permanent way:
1) Lose slowly. Studies show that a max of 1-3 pounds a week lost has the lowest relapse rate.
2) Make permanent lifestyle changes. In other words, refuse to diet. Instead, acquire the habits of a lean person.
3) Make this your mantra: "I refuse to do anything to lose weight that I am not willing to do the rest of my life to maintain it." This means that drastic cuts in calories is OUT. Exercising 6 times a week for 2 hours is OUT. Learn to lose in a slow, balanced, sustainable way. Acquire eating and exercising habits that are moderate, balanced, and sustainable for you.
4) Learn everything you can about calories, exercise, losing weight, how to have a lean, healthy lifestyle, etc. You have mastered how to be a fat person. Now get busy learning the skills, knowledge, and strategies of how to be a lean person. There is no single strategy, no magic bullet. But there is a lot of knowledge and skills that you need to acquire.
5) Forgive yourself. If you are full of self-loathing and blame, you will be susceptible to counter-productive behaviors such as flagellating yourself with over-exercising, punishing yourself with under-eating, and giving up on yourself by "throwing in the towel" at the smallest mistake. It's not the end of the world that you got overweight. It happens. (Look around you in MFP: you are not alone! :flowerforyou: )
6) Get support. You are in the right place! There are lots of great people here. Study the forums, find the ones with positive attitudes and a balanced, productive approach to weight loss. Get on their friend list. If you find someone on your friend list who is toxic and extreme, don't be afraid to delete them. They say that you are the average of the six people closest to you. Surround yourself with people who are where you want to be!
7) Keep yourself inspired. We all get down at times. Read the Success Stories thread often. :glasses:
Best of luck to you on your journey!
^ This. ... You can do it.0 -
You're definitely not alone. I've been a member for 3 years now. My first year I lost 50lbs and I felt awesome. I decided to take a few months off which ended being a year long break. I started school last Fall and came up with every excuse not to exercise or why I couldn't control my portion size. I gained back 32lbs and I felt so horrible about myself. I made a promise to myself that once Spring semester was done I would get back to where I was starting to feel good about myself again. I've lost 8 pounds since May 2nd- no more excuses! You have to WANT it it bad enough to succeed. Start logging your food and go from there. Good luck to you!0
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My heart cries out to you because we are so similar. I have struggled with weight my entire life and have lost various amounts and always gained them all back plus more. Even got lap banding, which I now have to live with the rest of my life ( meaning I can't eat certain foods without throwing them up or "regurgitating" them).
I am now on what I hope and say is my last trip down this road. I too have said "I can't do this again because it's just too painful". I am at a point now where I have lost almost 50 pounds and no one outside of my immediate family has said anything - and I think that's because they have all been down that road with me too many times as well. But this time I am not depending on those compliments, I am not letting the scale control me, and I am not despising myself. I am just taking this one choice at a time and trying to enjoy the ride. That may not be helpful, but it is the best I've got right now.
Also, Philippians 4:13 has become my go-to: "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me". And then I say, please God, give me that strength. I know for sure I don't have it on my own.
I wish you all the best.0 -
Strategies to lose weight in a healthy, permanent way:
1) Lose slowly. Studies show that a max of 1-3 pounds a week lost has the lowest relapse rate.
2) Make permanent lifestyle changes. In other words, refuse to diet. Instead, acquire the habits of a lean person.
3) Make this your mantra: "I refuse to do anything to lose weight that I am not willing to do the rest of my life to maintain it." This means that drastic cuts in calories is OUT. Exercising 6 times a week for 2 hours is OUT. Learn to lose in a slow, balanced, sustainable way. Acquire eating and exercising habits that are moderate, balanced, and sustainable for you.
4) Learn everything you can about calories, exercise, losing weight, how to have a lean, healthy lifestyle, etc. You have mastered how to be a fat person. Now get busy learning the skills, knowledge, and strategies of how to be a lean person. There is no single strategy, no magic bullet. But there is a lot of knowledge and skills that you need to acquire.
5) Forgive yourself. If you are full of self-loathing and blame, you will be susceptible to counter-productive behaviors such as flagellating yourself with over-exercising, punishing yourself with under-eating, and giving up on yourself by "throwing in the towel" at the smallest mistake. It's not the end of the world that you got overweight. It happens. (Look around you in MFP: you are not alone! :flowerforyou: )
6) Get support. You are in the right place! There are lots of great people here. Study the forums, find the ones with positive attitudes and a balanced, productive approach to weight loss. Get on their friend list. If you find someone on your friend list who is toxic and extreme, don't be afraid to delete them. They say that you are the average of the six people closest to you. Surround yourself with people who are where you want to be!
7) Keep yourself inspired. We all get down at times. Read the Success Stories thread often. :glasses:
Best of luck to you on your journey!
^ This. ... You can do it.0 -
Forgot to add that I have about 130 pounds to go - and I couldn't face that fact for a long time!0
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I am currently on HMR and have lost 100lbs in the last year. If you have been through the core part of the program then you have many of the skills you will need to be successful - you know about logging, about making good food choices, you have skills to get you through holidays etc. \
What no one can do is ignite the spark in you that make you give a **** about yourself and your future. You have to find that within yourself. You are already talking in terms of "if I gain the weight back" which suggests to me that you need to develop an athlete's mind about this - get strong, start believing you are worth it, believe you can do it (since you have already before!), know that you want it and that you will do what it takes to get there. I think the mental battle is the biggest thing for most of us since we all sure as hell know that broccoli is better for us than cake.
You can spend the next 2 years being afraid of failure (or success) and doing nothing, or you can work back to your goals. Either way the time will go by. It's up to you to make that time count. I look forward to seeing you post in the Success Stories forum. You know you can do it.0 -
I am going to be totally honest. Reading your experience put a shock of fear through my entire body, and I almost felt like getting sick. Just realizing that relapse is always possible for so many of us, as hopeful and determined we all may be. We never really know what the future will hold for us.
One thing I often tell myself, and the one thing I realized that got me motivated to workout and eat healthy is the idea that "If I don't do something, I am only going to get bigger and bigger". That is 100% black and white. Despite wishing I would wake up one morning and be thin and in shape and could run for miles without keeling over and dying on a sidewalk 2 houses away from my own...I knew wishing is not going to cut it.
Why do you want to lose weight? What motivates you to make this change? Keep a journal for yourself with your progress!
What worked well last time? What did not work? Where did things start to "slip"?
You did it once, you can do it again. Don't give up, because as long as you keep going - no matter what - you WILL get to your goal (even if you have to do it 10000000 times over...it will be worth it once you get it!)0 -
I read over everything and you can do it one day at a time.. Best wishes... :flowerforyou:0
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Its seems like youve been through alot, but its clear that since youve lost the weight before, you can do it again! try not to think about gaining it back. Tell yourself that you will not gain it back! You owe it to yourself! Take one day at a time. You can do this!0
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It's been said on here already, but firstly you lost weight through a "diet" and not a lifestyle change. I lost about 20-25 of the pounds on my ticker via a low carb, very low calorie (500-800/day) weight loss clinic plan. Not only was it expensive, but it was definitely not a lifestyle change I was OK with making for life. I don't deprive myself of anything (but I don't have it as often) and I watch my portion sizes. And when it's cooler out (I live in Phoenix so we don't really go outside during these months!), I hike, bike ride, walk, and hopefully soon I'll be running again.
Since you have problems with binge eating (and I certainly have had my fair share of binges), I would recommend you always log food BEFORE it goes in your mouth. That way, you can see what it does to your numbers before you make the mistake and regret it (and all the guilty feelings that go with it). Even if you have to hide your food diary from other people, at least you should be honest with yourself when it happens.
Lastly, as it's been said on here, you have to have a maintenance plan! You need a plan for when you reach your goal weight! For me, when I get to a point where I'm at a comfortable weight, I'm going to gradually increase my calories and continue daily weigh-ins until I find the number that keeps me steady. And, most importantly, I'm setting a comfortable range that I can move between, and a high mark (like a F***ING WALL) of weight number that I refuse to cross! If I see that number on the scale, I go back into hardcore "diet" mode of calorie cutting until I'm back into the right range again. I have a great e-book on the subject ( http://www.fourmilab.ch/hackdiet/hdpdf.zip ) that has a section about maintaining healthy weight for life.
I can't imagine what it must feel like for you to have worked so hard to lose all that weight, only to have to do it again. The most that ever happened to me was 15 pounds that I had to re-lose. Sharing your story helps those of us who want to learn from your mistakes and not have to go through what you're going through. Sometimes, we inspire people in the opposite way.
I hope you can find the motivation you seek and start pushing forward!0 -
Hi Heidi,
I also lost and regained. I lost over 100 pounds and gained most of it back. It was depressing and I felt so stupid. I kept making excuses to myself and throwing up my hands and thinking so what, I suck, I am a failure, I can't get anything right.
I am now at the lowest weight I've been for 25 years and I think I have it right this time. It's about changing my lifestyle, not about a diet. It's about redefining my relationship with food and taking back the emotional power I allowed it to have over me. Most importantly, it's about learning to love myself and be OK with who I am every step of the way, mistakes and all. It's about the journey more than the destination.
You can do this! It's not that you're doing it again, it's that you're doing it better, stronger, happier and wiser.
I believe in your success! :flowerforyou:
Kat0 -
You can be my new BFF. I would have to think hard, but I think I have gained 100+ lbs that I lost at least 3 times now? And this is all in the past few years. Talk about YO-YO! I just got put on Topamax on Friday for Night time binging. So far two days of not eating in the middle of the night. Woo. I will send a friend request right now. :-)0
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Neva Tap Out Let's Go!!!0
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www.overeatersanonymous.org/
This is a huge help in trying to decide Why we over eat and how to avoid it. It made sense to me to hear other people talk about food.0 -
First, you did it before; you can do it again!
Second, as crimsontech said, the first time you did it on a diet program with prepared foods. You were successful doing that. When you stopped doing that, you put on weight again. Going off the medication undoubtedly played a role, but another difference is that the prepared foods reduce your need to think about what you're going to eat. If you want to succeed without them, you need to do that thinking. I recommend planning meals in advance, and as much as possible, cooking them yourself. Use a food scale to weigh ingredients, and enter all your recipes in MFP so that you know exactly how many calories each one has.
I lost weight in my 20s simply by exercising a lot more and trying to eat more sensibly, without counting calories. But my life changed, I wasn't as active, and I slowly put it all back on, with interest. Since January I've been counting calories and have learned a lot about my former eating habits. I haven't given up any foods, but I'm much more aware of portion size and calorie density than I was.
My previous experience--especially gaining about 10 lbs. last fall alone--has taught me that I can't rely on my eating habits, at least not now, but my loss over the last 5 months has taught me that I *can* rely on counting calories, while I develop new habits. A useful engineering-managerial take on this is John Walker's free online book, "The Hacker's Diet" (http://www.fourmilab.ch/hackdiet/e4/). I'm looking forward to putting his advice on weight maintenance into practice: in a nutshell, weigh yourself daily, calculate the exponentially smoothed weighted average of those figures (or use a website or spreadsheet to do it), and if the average gets more than 5 lbs. over your target, then cut calories until it's back at your target. It's an early warning system against uncontrolled gradual weight gain. Walker's approach completely sets aside questions of guilt or responsibility: as he says, if someone has poor vision, you don't criticize them for their weak eyes, you give them glasses. It's not a complete solution--it doesn't address the complex relationship that many people have with food--but it's a useful perspective.
Good luck!0 -
I would totally look at it in a positive way you did it once and you can do it again. the most I have lost was 50 pounds and then I gained it back when i had to deal with some family problems. But I just joined mfp yesterday and i am here if you need someone to talk to. I am on a mission to lose at least 125 pounds maybe more. I am currently at 324 pounds and 5'9.0
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Strategies to lose weight in a healthy, permanent way:
1) Lose slowly. Studies show that a max of 1-3 pounds a week lost has the lowest relapse rate.
2) Make permanent lifestyle changes. In other words, refuse to diet. Instead, acquire the habits of a lean person.
3) Make this your mantra: "I refuse to do anything to lose weight that I am not willing to do the rest of my life to maintain it." This means that drastic cuts in calories is OUT. Exercising 6 times a week for 2 hours is OUT. Learn to lose in a slow, balanced, sustainable way. Acquire eating and exercising habits that are moderate, balanced, and sustainable for you.
4) Learn everything you can about calories, exercise, losing weight, how to have a lean, healthy lifestyle, etc. You have mastered how to be a fat person. Now get busy learning the skills, knowledge, and strategies of how to be a lean person. There is no single strategy, no magic bullet. But there is a lot of knowledge and skills that you need to acquire.
5) Forgive yourself. If you are full of self-loathing and blame, you will be susceptible to counter-productive behaviors such as flagellating yourself with over-exercising, punishing yourself with under-eating, and giving up on yourself by "throwing in the towel" at the smallest mistake. It's not the end of the world that you got overweight. It happens. (Look around you in MFP: you are not alone! :flowerforyou: )
6) Get support. You are in the right place! There are lots of great people here. Study the forums, find the ones with positive attitudes and a balanced, productive approach to weight loss. Get on their friend list. If you find someone on your friend list who is toxic and extreme, don't be afraid to delete them. They say that you are the average of the six people closest to you. Surround yourself with people who are where you want to be!
7) Keep yourself inspired. We all get down at times. Read the Success Stories thread often. :glasses:
Best of luck to you on your journey!
^^^THIS!!! Absolutely the best advice you have recieved!! I love it and may print it out for myself and other friends! thanks Bettyeditor for posting!0
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