So frustrated!!

Deborahmarieoneill
Deborahmarieoneill Posts: 8
edited September 21 in Motivation and Support
Hi all,
hope you don't mind a rant. Am finding it really hard to get my exercise in, I really try to make time but I just feel consumed by my family. When I get ready to go to the gym my nearly six year old daughter stands moaning and crying asking me not to go. A lot of the time I can ignore it but it's becoming difficult. Yesterday or today I didn't get to the gym but I did my cross trainer at home. This evening I got the kids all sorted and up to bed and went off to do my exercise in my room and my daughter followed me in crying that she wasn't tired and was afraid of bad dreams. Don't get me wrong she is generally a great kid but I feel that if I attempt to take any me time at all she fights it all the way. I just feel so down with it, only got ten minutes exercise today, I dunno, I've tried getting up early, before husband and the two kids, but as soon as I'm up the kids are up wanting me. Anyway thanks for letting me rant, hopefully I'll have a more successful day tomorrow

Debs

Replies

  • lirpa888
    lirpa888 Posts: 1 Member
    I have run into the same problems and either have to work out late in the evening or early in the morning. Any chance of getting hubby to help out? Mine's not always that supportive, and the kids would rather have me, but sometimes they have to all step up to the plate. I'm a better Mom when I get my workout in. Remember 10 minutes is better than 0!
  • littlemamajamie
    littlemamajamie Posts: 118 Member
    Deb I know how you feel I have 4 kids myself and they are constantly wanting something from me. I have learned that as much as they cry and fight it I HAVE to have that me time. I just took it even when it felt impossible and now my kids know that when I am working out that is what I am doing and they need to wait until I'm done. Don't get me wrong I make sure that they couldn't possibly need anything before I start. :) I know its hard and seems impossible but you deserve that you time and you need to take it for your health and happiness. Hang in there it will get easier.
  • jruss0112
    jruss0112 Posts: 1
    I know exactly how you feel, but it's the small things you can do while watching tv or normal down time that can add up. For example while my son watches a cartoon on the TV I can do crunches or pushups. A half an hour can lead to a decent workout.
  • SparkleKittie
    SparkleKittie Posts: 127
    You are going to have to be firm about having mommy time. Mommy time is important and if you're firm with her about having time to yourself without being aggressive, but being unchanged and firm, she will thank you later in life because she won't be so attached to you. It's a good thing. You get time to do what you need to do, and she gets to be more independent. When I was little my mother smothered me and then when I became a teen I wanted to spend all my time with her and she snapped at me for time to herself. It's a good thing to start early in getting them on their own little by little. Crying about being scared is hard to look past. Tucking her in at bedtime, reading stories, etc is a good idea and a great habit for mother-child bonding. But don't let her take away a routine that you need. You're the parent. w00tw00t for good moms! I hope to be one one day! Just because I'm not doesn't mean you shouldn't try my advice though. You need time to yourself and she needs time without mommy too.
  • Deborahmarieoneill
    Deborahmarieoneill Posts: 8
    Thank you guys for all the really supportive comments. I am going to chat to her tomorrow about having mommy time and get my hubby on board re making sure I get that time! I think she may be a wee bit anxious because I'm heading back to work next week after a while off and she is acting out a little. I have a bedtime routine with her but am thinking that maybe I've been rushing it so I'm going to focus tomorrow on getting her to bed so we can have a little extra time with her. Once again thanks for all the support xxx
  • sorellabella
    sorellabella Posts: 133 Member
    Yes, I agree with SparkleKittie...set up a firm mommy time and be consistent about it. Also take the kids out with you while you walk or jog. You will be setting a great example for them. Remember we can't take care of others until we take care of ourselves.

    I know it's hard I have 4 ... granted now 2 are grown and out of the house but when I had all of them home I was a taxi driver to 4 different schools prior to getting to work. That was my workout then as well as walks at lunch but now that I only have 2 at home they know I make it a point that I have my time for me.

    Hang in there ... you'll find the time and will figure out what works for you in the long run. Best of luck on your journey. Friend me if you like.
  • JJs25th
    JJs25th Posts: 204 Member
    I'm a Mom and I can say that every child displayes this at some point and usually right around this age. Be firm! Don't let her lay the Mommy guilt on you! You need to take care of you so you can continue to take care of her (and her siblings). As Moms it is way too easy to be lost in the mommy world -- you become "Suzi's Mom" and often you are also "Dave's wife". You need to remember you are YOU -- and your time helps you do that. Keep working ar it.
  • emorym
    emorym Posts: 344
    I am a stay at home dad with 2 kids (15,11). It has not always been easy to work out. We used to call it the CRY-MCA. Start training your kids and your husband now and it will pay off later. Some advice I was given pretty early on was to take care of myself. Make some time for you. Going to the doctor, working out, buy yourself a new outfit every now and then, coffee with friends. Taking care of the family is a VERY full time job. I have my kids pretty trained, now I need to start working on my wife;-) I am training for a triathlon and have a 3 hour training planned for tomorrow. My wife is also running in the morning. We are able to leave the kids at home while we both go to our respective workouts. So just keep doing this for you and everyone will learn that you need some time as well.
  • Natural
    Natural Posts: 461 Member
    is it possible to wake up earlier in the morning or ask your husband or SO to look after your daughter while you work out.

    it is a constant juggle. maybe your daughter can watch a movie, or be given crayons, a book or a project to do while you work out. i know this doesn't sound like real life, but something that would distract her for a few. or maybe she can join you in your exercise. it could be a game for her and a workout for you.

    v
  • emorym
    emorym Posts: 344
    I was just on face book and a stay at home mom friend of mine just posted this

    "It isn't selfish to take care of yourself." I was thinking wow how did she know I had just replied to a post along those same lines.
  • ShrinkingNinja
    ShrinkingNinja Posts: 460 Member
    I have been through this and I did the worst thing I could have done. I caved every time. If you don't take care of yourself it will be had to take care of your kids. You will not have the energy to be the fun mom that we all want to be.

    Here is my suggestion... Take 20 mins a day and lock the door. There is an exercise program called the Peak 8. You can do it with any exercise really, but I actually prefer this one on a treadmill or exercise bike. You get a timer and workout as hard and as fast as you can for 30 seconds. Then you do the same exercise slower or you rest for 90 seconds. You do this for 8 sets. The effect is amazing how well you will have worked out especially if you do the exercise with less intensity during your rest period. It ends up giving you the same results as if you worked out for an hour.

    I wish someone had told me about this when my kids were little and demanding all my time. It took getting them into karate and then me joining before I could workout at all. Now, they look forward to me working out too.
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