men vs women.... am i odd

willowlefae
willowlefae Posts: 11 Member
in Motivation and Support
I feel odd actually talking about this but it is something that is a huge motivator for me.. I have always been the fat kid sister yet I have no true older brothers. Most of the guys throughout my life have called me sis, cute, funny, ect; never was I called sexy, hott, or any other sexual terms. In the past few months I have realized that the very few times I have received that sexual attention, I have pushed myself more than ever before to reach my goals. There is no getting around it, I’m a flirt, I thrive on sexual attention. I was active in the BDSM lifestyle for a while but I prefer the sexier side and it was shortly realized that humiliation is for the bigger people, and I’m just not into that. So about my topic… yes I do love the encouragement from females but I get so much more motivated when it comes from a guy and even more when it could be classified as perverted. (remember bdsm flunkie here) Well there it is.. I am extremely open and friendly to anyone and everyone and I need all the motivation I can get!!

Replies

  • PilatesConvert
    PilatesConvert Posts: 55 Member
    I'd guess you're in your early 20s. That's not a bad thing, but it does color your current world view. How you feel about yourself (in general in your own head), and the way you receive attention from both men and women is likely to morph as you age and mature. Getting healthier will certainly get you more sexual attention, but only if you can own being that hot girl. The secret turns out to be that you can OWN IT at any size. If you really love your body and think you're sexy as hell, you exude that and people respond to it.

    So, as a woman in her 30s who once felt very similar, I encourage you to start the journey of loving yourself, your body, ALL of you, now. As to the degree of perversion? Healthy BDSM actually puts the sub in most of the power. They call the safe word. They define the consensual lines. It doesn't seem that way at first glance, but it takes a person with a strong sense of will to be a good sub. Someone who will speak up for themself. I certainly encourage you to have whatever sex makes you happy, but I hope these other thoughts help.
  • shortie_sarah
    shortie_sarah Posts: 177 Member
    I'd guess you're in your early 20s. That's not a bad thing, but it does color your current world view. How you feel about yourself (in general in your own head), and the way you receive attention from both men and women is likely to morph as you age and mature. Getting healthier will certainly get you more sexual attention, but only if you can own being that hot girl. The secret turns out to be that you can OWN IT at any size. If you really love your body and think you're sexy as hell, you exude that and people respond to it.


    I like the way she worded that...pretty much summed up what I was going to say.. How sexy is what you make it. If you feel sexy and act confident about it, men will find you sexy as well. They love confidence.
  • trin5703
    trin5703 Posts: 15 Member
    >> The secret turns out to be that you can OWN IT at any size. If you really love your body and think you're sexy as hell, you exude that and people respond to it. <<

    THIS! THIS is it. Im not young by any means... Im not young, and Im not a size 6 either, far from it. But I will tell you that I and quite a few women of my acquaintance that what size you are has nothing to do with how sexy you feel or how sexy you appear to others. Its the way you carry yourself, the way you shine from the inside, its how you feel "in your own skin."
    Case in point, I have a very good friend who is by no means a skinny mini. She is of average height, and probably well over 200... but that woman has men of every age flocking to her! I envy her social calendar :)
  • willowlefae
    willowlefae Posts: 11 Member
    Thanks to all of you... In tears now.. If you read my profile you will see where my hatred for myself and my weight comes from. It's so hard at times to even want to be beautiful in any light but I know for me to be truly happy I need to find that beauty.
  • curvymomo3
    curvymomo3 Posts: 253 Member
    I do not think that you are alone in your thinking, I too get majorly fueled by mens positive encouragement. I want to know that I am sexy, beautiful, attractive, hot, gorgeous... i dont know why but it is what it is. And a few close friends I have spoken with are the same way..

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