Motivation and Help PLEASE!

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Raina0512
Raina0512 Posts: 216
in Motivation and Support
So here's my story:

I'm 23 yrs old and I have two daughters, ages 2 1/2 and 4. After my second baby, I got down to a comfortable weight of 110-115 without exercising and watching what I ate... I was determined to lose that baby weight. :smile: When I first joined MFP (:love: ) I weighed 130 lbs. I never exercised, and I later came to find out that I was consuming approximately 2000-3000 calories a day. I was 'chubby' and very unhappy.
Through everyones support and experiences on MFP, I decided to calorie count and exercise (We have a gym where we live that is 2 min walking distance). I was waking up every morning at 4am 5-6 days a week to exercise (treadmill 3-4 miles and ab work). I started eating the MFP recommended 1200 calories/day and I ate most of my exercise calories. After about 4 months of that... I had lost NO weight and I GAINED a lot of muscle, especially in my legs (my yucky area). My husband had noticed the muscle gain also. That was hard to hear and soak in. I did lose cellulite on the back of my legs, but they did get noticably bigger.
So. I stopped exercising. I figured I got to a comfortable weight without it before, heck, I can do it again! I sleep in (530a - Haha) and started eating more fruit/veges and drinking 10+ glasses of water a day. I customized my MFP to 1000 calories/day, basically so I could mentally keep focused and stay under the 1200/day. Most days, I did succeed. Some days I did splurge... So, I recently got down to 117 lbs. I will admit, that lately, I've been bad. I do GREAT during the day, while I'm at work. I think it's the structure and order and being able to pack a lunch and have healthy options at hand. But... when I get home, I eat anything and everything I can get my hands on... If I have one bite of something 'bad'... It's all downhill from there. I've been at this 117 lb plateau for at least a month now... and I'm getting so frustrated. I just don't know what to do... 1/2 of the people I talk to say I should work out... BUT I don't want all of that muscle and bulkiness. I want lean and trim. I don't get that when I work out. I'm stuck in a rut and I'm loosing all motivation and energy I have to continue this...

I guess I need help. A plan. Motivation... Anything will help. :ohwell:

Replies

  • MaryTheIceCube
    MaryTheIceCube Posts: 1,099 Member
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    Hello and welcome to MFP! Congratulations on your decision to get fit and your progress so far! You sound determined to keep going despite the waning motivation, and that's great! You'll find everyone on this site to be very positive, encouraging and motivating. Feel free to friend request me if you'd like. :)

    Also, if you're on Facebook, please feel free to check out the group I created over there, called Motivation. Many positive, encouraging people over that way, too! http://www.facebook.com/group.php?gid=268180696780&ref=ts

    Best wishes on your fitness journey!

    ~ Chandra
  • erickirb
    erickirb Posts: 12,293 Member
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    Eat more would be the best guess, as no one should eat less than 1200 calories. Your metabolism may be slowing down due the the strict caloric intake. Try adding in 100 calories/day up to 1100 for a week then the following week to 1200, stay at 1200 for a couple of weeks to give your body time to adjust and see if you have any results, if not try increasing your calories the same way every couple of weeks.

    FYI: Skipping is one of the best cardio exercises and from what I have read it is the least likely to build muscle.
  • kwallen90
    kwallen90 Posts: 23 Member
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    Hey Raina,
    I had a similar problem. As soon as I would start exercising I would bulk up so you what I did was make sure I limited my carbs (lean meats & veggies for the first 2 weeks - kinda like atkins) and I did a lot of cardio. I didn't lift weights for the first two weeks because I knew it would raise the scale and kill my motivation. I have a muscular frame and knew that the first week of lifting weights the scale would go up like 5 lbs. Anyway, after 2 weeks of cardio and lean meat & veggies I had lost 16lbs and then I added light weights (8lbs) doing bicep curls and shoulder press. That helped me, maybe it could work for you. The best part is at least you're getting healthier although I know we tend to use the scale as our progress meter. Good luck!
  • roxycolby8
    roxycolby8 Posts: 1
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    Hey Raina0512!
    My hat's off to you for being a mother, wife and working! First of all, pat yourself on the back and be proud of all that you've done in 23 YEARS!
    I understand that frustration behind following a routine and not seeing any significant results...especially where you want it to count. Muscle does burn fat more efficiently...ps. Also, I've had the same problem for years. I run and weight train REGULARLY and never saw a change in my body. As a matter of fact, I would go so far as to say my body got so used to the strains I put it through it leveled out and can deal with the work I put it through.
    I recently started adding Bikram Yoga, Vinyasa Yoga, Swimming and Biking to my routine and it has made a huge difference. Yoga, in general, lengthens everything...so no real bulk and tones down areas.
    I also have a huge problem with consuming too many calories when I get home from work. I recommend developing a routine were you do something else besides go straight to the kitchen. If that means taking the time to change into your PJ's, read 2 pages of a book, say a prayer, meditate on your past days events. Give yourself 30 minutes of quiet time at home after work...if you find that you are still hungry. Eat something small, like a cup of oatmeal with some honey and savor it.
    I hope you can find some motivation in this! Good Luck and Great Job so far!
  • ohwhataday
    ohwhataday Posts: 1,398 Member
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    All I wanna know is how tall are you? I'm not judging but 117 is pretty small, and I would be thrilled to be that small as I am 5' 1 3/4". I agree with the eat more because 1000 calories doesn't seem like much. We need fuel to burn it. You know what's funny, I somewhat recently started drinking a lot of cold water, exercising here and there with my elliptical, not a lot, and watched the amounts of foods I consumed, and lost 18 lbs in a couple weeks it seemed. Now I'm stuck in that spot, and had started working out a lot more. So I can see how frustrating that would be for you and I wish you the best of luck! And remember as we get older, we do gain weight. And after having children, my body is definitely not the same! Wish I were a celebrity..
  • nhendri
    nhendri Posts: 236 Member
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    I would suggest more snacks. I have the same issue at night. I just wanna eat everything. I have added scramble eggs to my toast and coffee in the morining and at 2 pm I have a piece fruite or a 100 cal pack. As of this past week my nightly habit of eating everything in sight is ALOT better. I agree being under 1200 calories may be your issue. It sounds dumb that more calories would cause a weight reduction but it realy works. I understand your though process of targeting a lower calorie amount for the day because you have gone over but that doesnt seem to be working. Try targeting for at least 1200 and instead of doing a big work out routine try walking ten minutes. Your still geting the excersize without bulking up.
  • Ellem86
    Ellem86 Posts: 204
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    Hi Raina

    I hear you with the plateau and the ensuing lack of motivation. I haven't lost anything for about 6 weeks now.

    I also strongly suggest doing yoga and pilates. Bikram yoga is supposed to be good as it's done in a heated room but I have never done it. Hatha and Ashtanga yoga burn quite a few calories, stretch the body and really make you feel like you have worked out. I'm not kidding, I have asthma and I have to use my inhaler before the class so I don't feel like conking out!

    About how much you eat, I'm also not sure about this. I have tried eating 1,200 and 1,400 and both plus exercise cals and still no change! I am starting to realise that perhaps it's not *how much* I'm eating but maybe *what* I'm eating. I'm seeing that this matters so much more the closer you are to your goal weight. I'm trying out more lean protein and fewer carbs as suggested above from next week Monday. As for snacking in this evening, this might be to do with not eating enough during the day.

    I'm starting a 12 week challenge on Monday to blast through my plateau and lose this final 12 pounds - join me if you want!
  • Raina0512
    Raina0512 Posts: 216
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    Eat more would be the best guess, as no one should eat less than 1200 calories. Your metabolism may be slowing down due the the strict caloric intake. Try adding in 100 calories/day up to 1100 for a week then the following week to 1200, stay at 1200 for a couple of weeks to give your body time to adjust and see if you have any results, if not try increasing your calories the same way every couple of weeks.

    FYI: Skipping is one of the best cardio exercises and from what I have read it is the least likely to build muscle.

    I'll try this... I find that when I do eat 1200+ calories I feel horrible! Both physically and mentally... I feel like I over ate... But, On days when I do stay under goal and eat well, I always seem to splurge like crazy when I get home/weekends.
  • Raina0512
    Raina0512 Posts: 216
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    Hey Raina,
    I had a similar problem. As soon as I would start exercising I would bulk up so you what I did was make sure I limited my carbs (lean meats & veggies for the first 2 weeks - kinda like atkins) and I did a lot of cardio. I didn't lift weights for the first two weeks because I knew it would raise the scale and kill my motivation. I have a muscular frame and knew that the first week of lifting weights the scale would go up like 5 lbs. Anyway, after 2 weeks of cardio and lean meat & veggies I had lost 16lbs and then I added light weights (8lbs) doing bicep curls and shoulder press. That helped me, maybe it could work for you. The best part is at least you're getting healthier although I know we tend to use the scale as our progress meter. Good luck!

    Maybe I should start exercising again... I know that when I did exercise, I usually ate ALL of my exercise calories as well... maybe just staying at my 1200/day goal and exercising would make a difference... What do you think?
  • gvcgoldmedal
    gvcgoldmedal Posts: 15
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    When you exercised did you workout and do cardio on both days? Did you eat right after you worked out? These are important questions because it affects the way your body rebuilds muscle and burns fat. Most of the good effects of doing cardio happen in the hours AFTER your work out. For this reason you shouldn't weight lift after you do cardio. Weight lifting sends a spike of insulin through your body. The insulin tells your muscle cells to be responsive to protiens and carbs to help in the recovery and rebuilding process. Here's the catch, insulin is a fat burning inhibitor. So if you lift right after you do cardio you are working against yourself.

    Second, start measuring your legs. Get back to lifting. You might be surprised to see that you aren't really gaining that much in your legs. If you are worried about that, then do low low weight (5-15lbs) and work your upper body. Most girls I know do alot of chest exercises, for obvious reasons. Unless you are eating lots of protein and carbs right after you work out, you will not bulk up. Trust me. I spend enough in supplements a month to help me bulk up. Without them I gain next to nothing. Just lifting isn't enough to see alot of gains.

    I'm not entirely sure of your schedule with the kidos and husband but I would recommend this; Run in the mornings or walk. Get your cardio then. Have a healthy breakfast. A BIG healthy breakfast. Make it 500 calories, seeing as you just gained some calories on your walk/run that isn't as much as it sounds. After work, do not go straight home (again dependent on your schedule as a mom) go to the gym. Run for 10 minutes to loosen up then lift for 30+. This will burn another 200 cals or so. Eat a decent dinner. A solid dinner.

    That brings me to solid calories. I haven't looked at your diary yet, but make sure your calories are solid foods as much as possible. Solid foods take longer to digest, meaning you won't get as hungry as quickly. Say if parts of your breakfast calories are coffee, thats going to be digested quickly and you will be hungry way before lunch.

    Eat two small meals (snacks 100-200) calories at 10 and 3. If you do nothing else, do this. Even if it puts you over your calorie goal. It will be better for you in the long run. I think you are slipping into the starvation mode. The better equipped your body becomes at handling foods the more it needs. Solid meals, more calories. Sounds counter productive but it will help.

    Lastly, be confident in the way you look, not the number on the scale. You want to look a certain way, not weigh a certain weight. Measure your stomach, butt, legs and neck. Pay closer attention to these numbers than the one on the scale.

    Do all of that and hopefully you'll break through that plateau. Every one plateaus. And keep representing that 816/913. :)
  • Raina0512
    Raina0512 Posts: 216
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    When you exercised did you workout and do cardio on both days? Did you eat right after you worked out? These are important questions because it affects the way your body rebuilds muscle and burns fat. Most of the good effects of doing cardio happen in the hours AFTER your work out. For this reason you shouldn't weight lift after you do cardio. Weight lifting sends a spike of insulin through your body. The insulin tells your muscle cells to be responsive to protiens and carbs to help in the recovery and rebuilding process. Here's the catch, insulin is a fat burning inhibitor. So if you lift right after you do cardio you are working against yourself.

    Second, start measuring your legs. Get back to lifting. You might be surprised to see that you aren't really gaining that much in your legs. If you are worried about that, then do low low weight (5-15lbs) and work your upper body. Most girls I know do alot of chest exercises, for obvious reasons. Unless you are eating lots of protein and carbs right after you work out, you will not bulk up. Trust me. I spend enough in supplements a month to help me bulk up. Without them I gain next to nothing. Just lifting isn't enough to see alot of gains.

    I'm not entirely sure of your schedule with the kidos and husband but I would recommend this; Run in the mornings or walk. Get your cardio then. Have a healthy breakfast. A BIG healthy breakfast. Make it 500 calories, seeing as you just gained some calories on your walk/run that isn't as much as it sounds. After work, do not go straight home (again dependent on your schedule as a mom) go to the gym. Run for 10 minutes to loosen up then lift for 30+. This will burn another 200 cals or so. Eat a decent dinner. A solid dinner.

    That brings me to solid calories. I haven't looked at your diary yet, but make sure your calories are solid foods as much as possible. Solid foods take longer to digest, meaning you won't get as hungry as quickly. Say if parts of your breakfast calories are coffee, thats going to be digested quickly and you will be hungry way before lunch.

    Eat two small meals (snacks 100-200) calories at 10 and 3. If you do nothing else, do this. Even if it puts you over your calorie goal. It will be better for you in the long run. I think you are slipping into the starvation mode. The better equipped your body becomes at handling foods the more it needs. Solid meals, more calories. Sounds counter productive but it will help.

    Lastly, be confident in the way you look, not the number on the scale. You want to look a certain way, not weigh a certain weight. Measure your stomach, butt, legs and neck. Pay closer attention to these numbers than the one on the scale.

    Do all of that and hopefully you'll break through that plateau. Every one plateaus. And keep representing that 816/913. :)

    816/913!!! :laugh:

    Okay. I'm going to listen to you. But you have to watch me the whole time to keep me accountable for my actions/intake. Deal?
    #1: When I worked out, I did it M-Sat. I did 3-4 miles on the treadmill and I did numerous crunches. Nothing else. I would usually have a yogurt after I worked out. But that's it.
    #2: I will measure. Everything.
    #3: Schedule issue. I will wake up and do my cardio (treadmill 3-4 miles), I usually do 3.5-4.0 speed. But, the am is the only time I'm going to be able to do this. I don't have an option to do it after work or in the evening. I will eat a hearty breakfast... 500 calories seems like a lot to me... Maybe 300?? :ohwell: Right now look at my diary settings, I have the calorie goals of each meal set next to the name... That's what I've been TRYING for... let me know what adjustments need to be made, within reason.
    #4: Note: Solid meals. Two 100-200 calorie snacks.

    I'll start tomorrow morning... 08/25/2010 :happy: I'll track my meals and exercise like you say... Hahah! You're going to be my personal trainer!!
  • gvcgoldmedal
    gvcgoldmedal Posts: 15
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    Deal, I'll be right there with you the whole way.

    Lose the crunches after your cardio. Crunches = Strength Training = Insulin Spike (albeit low) = Inhibited Fat Burn. In the mornings, an apple will wake you up. If you like apples go with it. They don't have the chemical abilities to wake us, but the chewing and swallowing, for whatever reason, is suppose to help you become alert. I don't do it, but I have friends who swear by it. Give it a shot.

    I'll meet you in the middle with breakfast, at 400 calories. Try to add in whole grains here; fiber, carbs and calories that will give you a solid base for the day. Toast is usually a good way to go.

    Pick a day to cheat. Sunday if you must. And cheat. Not huge, but go 500 calories over or more. Don't put a number on it, just cheat. That way on wednesday when that chocolate cookie is calling you in your mind you can say... well I cheated sunday.. and I get to cheat this sunday so I don't need it. CHEAT! Based on your posts your pretty determined and strong willed so don't fight me on this, it'll help in the long run.

    Just before bed or night time shower do; puhsups, lunges, squats and your ab work. If you have a pull up bar that fits on the door frame do those as well. Try to do this an hour before bed or more. Thats probably the time you put the kids to bed, so work with it as much as you can. MWF.

    Cardio, take wednesday and sunday off. Monday, Tuesday, Thrusday, Firday, Saturday for cardio. This will keep your body guessing on the calorie burn/intake. Do not eat less on wednesday. You'll probably go over your calorie goal a little. Its okay, gotta keep the body guessing of you'll plateau.

    Goal, give me three weeks and we'll see if we can break you through this :)

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