I'M NEW!! I KEEP LOSING WEIGHT BUT IT KEEPS FINDING ME!

Fitphobia
Fitphobia Posts: 12 Member
Hi: I'm here because I have weight to lose, but I need lots of help :-)

I have been fighting weight ever since I remember!!! I need to try again and found this site (through a friend). Over the years I have gotten "bored" with the diets, the costs got too high (through different programs).

There are a few issues that I have identified as my downfalls....so hopefully by reading through these boards I will get the motivation to try again and be successful....(or if someone recognizes one of my issues and knows of a thread then they can kindly point me in the right direction...). So - where do I start??

(1) I'm old (well, in my 50's)
(2) I find every social gathering involves food - so when dieting I sort of cut myself off of "social" events - this isn't a great idea as I can do it for so long and then "jump off the train" - most of my friends are larger as well so they tend to "enable" straying from diets
(3) I have over 150 lbs to lose....so I often feel defeated before I start
(4) I don't really enjoy cooking, especially after getting home from a long day at work - so I have fallen in the bad habit of quick processed food...
(5) Exercise **sigh** - see # 3 above....very difficult indeed... As well, I have arthritis/sore joints. The doctor says it's OK to do exercise (but no direction of what to do) but I am nervous to try, so suggestions of "easy" to get started ideas are most certainly welcome (I don't have $$ for gym membership or personal trainers...)
(6) and...probably like so many others - if I mess up or stray from a weight loss plan I let the guilt get to me and the little voices in my head say "Ahhh, you already messed up, so you might as well eat this too...." and it all falls apart in a downward spiral.

I'm hoping this time may be the charm - I'm just sick and tired of feeling sick and tired :-)

Replies

  • Jaulen
    Jaulen Posts: 468 Member
    1) Metabolism does slow down with age, can be countered to a point by increasing your lean muscle mass.

    2) You can eat what you want, just plan for it, measure it truthfully, and LOG it. Stay within your calorie goals.

    3) Every journey starts with the first step.....just have to be consistent, realize that when you do screw up it's not reason to say WTH and stop....it just means you need to assess, take a deep breath and continue to make good choices, and get into good habits

    4) Process meals are high sodium, which isn't good for you. If you hate cooking, try doing a cooking day, where you make batches of stuff, portion it out, freeze it. It's grab and go food. (I do this alot, mini meatloafs, soups, casserols, meatballs and sauce, burritos)

    5) Walking. Costs nothing, can be done around the neighborhood, is low impact. Also stairs at your house, good starting points.

    6) have to start countering that voice with "Oh well, I messed up. No big deal. I'll do better at my next meal." (and mean it). If you go over by a couple hundred calories one day.....just try to go under a couple of calories each day for rest of the week. when it comes to weight.....it's a long term averages over time proposition.....
  • Fitphobia
    Fitphobia Posts: 12 Member
    Good points :-) I'll try walking some (might start tonight) but worried about getting too far and not getting back (I'll make sure I take my cell phone). The knees can't handle the stairs right now, but maybe in time when the physiotherapist does her magic. Like the idea of a cooking day!!!!! If I can come home and grab something fast it may be easier.....
  • Jaulen
    Jaulen Posts: 468 Member
    the cooking day is a savior for me....often it's like. "ah! I don't have time to cook....I'll stop by wendy's>" then a little voice in my head says....'Um, you have stuff at home, don't waste money'

    I've also done chili, cooked rice, twice baked potatoes, potato puffs, quiches, baked french toasts .... so I try to plan for some sides too.

    pre-made Meatloaf, a microwaved baked potato, and some steamed/sauteed fresh veg only take a few mins to make (especially if you've preplanned and have your veg already sliced at the start of the week.

    Chili is really good served over a baked potato, or cooked rice with a little cheese. (I had never thought of freezing left over rice until i rad it somewhere....)

    the recipe boards here are a good source of recipies too, especially some of the crock pot meals. (yum)
  • Fitphobia
    Fitphobia Posts: 12 Member
    Oh - haven't discovered the recipe boards yet. Thanks for the great advice :-)
    Potatoes with a little cheese? Sounds yummy.... I guess I have to "re-think" the diet food idea....cheese used to be a no-no...but it would spruce up a lot of things and add a good flavour.....
  • LMJS
    LMJS Posts: 157 Member
    Try cooking with a slow cooker. A little planning ahead but there are some very tasty dishes out there to find online. when you get home from a tiring day and you walk in to the smell of dinner cooking and all you have to do is dish it up! Yummy! Then any extra portions can be saved for later in the week or frozen for another time.
    I love my slow cooker!
  • Fitphobia
    Fitphobia Posts: 12 Member
    The slow cooker is a great idea.....I will have to get some recipe ideas (besides my meatballs)
  • Jaulen
    Jaulen Posts: 468 Member
    For dinner sunday I'll be tossing in some pork chops, some 'kraut, a sliced onion, a couple of chopped green apples, with some homemade apple butter (I did it wrong....added vinegar instead of apple cider...TART!), dijjon mustard, and fennel seeds.

    Will serve with mock mashed potatoes. (cauliflower)
  • kathyascott
    kathyascott Posts: 2 Member
    my name is Kathy I feel the same way ; exercise is very hard knees have a lot of problems . I find out if you can just walk and move your arm what ever pace you can do you will still be able to lose weight. just try it :smile:
  • kcaffee1
    kcaffee1 Posts: 759 Member
    As has been stated before - start small with small changes. A lot of people who have a long way to go try to make too many changes at once, and then find that some of those changes don't work really well for long term sustainable living.

    Try to adjust the mind from "diet" (ie - eat this way to loose weight, then what ever after) to "life style" (ie - this is something you can do from now on.) When you make a change - keep this foundation in mind.

    Make no food taboo unless you are going to forever avoid it. (I don't think ANYONE can manage that one.) Tough restrictions are fine - short term. (like cutting out all sugary treats if necessary to break a sweet tooth.) The only exception to this is if you have a medical reason to cut out certain foods/food groups. Then MAKE SURE YOU ARE REPLACING THOSE CALORIES. I speak from experience - medical reason to cut out breads/most grain products, and I had a horrible time adjusting, because I wasn't replacing the missing calories/nutrients.

    With a large amount to lose and feeling discouraged at the outset, this can make things even worse. Set mini-goals, such as 5 pounds, 10 pounds, walk 3 blocks, walk the entire neighborhood, etc. Don't FOCUS on the finish wire. Know it's out there, and you WILL reach it. But, focus on smaller things you can manage right now.

    Walking is your friend, but try not to rush out and over do it. If you can only walk around the block this week, GOOD FOR YOU! You are already ahead of those people who aren't getting up off the couch! You can only walk to the stop sign three doors down? GREAT! You are up and moving! The big thing is: Take it slow. Let each change you make settle some and become comfortable enough you know you can live with it before changing too much else.
  • kathyascott
    kathyascott Posts: 2 Member
    sometimes we all need some help to get threw the life change of not eating junk food .or what ever we want its very hard. and we all need people to help give us inspiration.
  • LIZABETH50
    LIZABETH50 Posts: 5 Member
    I have that saying on a little plaque over my kitchen sink. I find it amusing but so true.
  • LIZABETH50
    LIZABETH50 Posts: 5 Member
    Exercise gets easier the more you do. Small walks up and down your driveway or in the yard or in front of your house until it gets easier. Do it at your pace. You can join up with people down the road if you want. If you aren't happy about it do it anyway. You will be.
    You can break 1/2 walk into 3 10 minute walks.
    Good Luck.
  • Fitphobia
    Fitphobia Posts: 12 Member
    Thanks for the encouragement everyone!!! I tried the food tracker today and will be looking to see where I go wrong in the next few days before "D-Day" - today I was under calories but wayyyyyy over in the sugars and wayyyy under the protein. Will be looking where to adjust in the next few days.
  • DRTChic
    DRTChic Posts: 40 Member
    I completely understand...I have lost 1000lbs and gained 1300lbs!
  • CoachJake83
    CoachJake83 Posts: 108
    Let's address each one. Imma give some straight talk cause you came here for results not pats on the back.

    (1) I'm old (well, in my 50's)

    -Doesn't matter. Although metabolism slows down it's so insignificant it only serves as an excuse. Find your calorie target, whatever formula you use will take into account your age, and the difference it makes will be very small whether you're 18 or 50.

    (2) I find every social gathering involves food - so when dieting I sort of cut myself off of "social" events - this isn't a great idea as I can do it for so long and then "jump off the train" - most of my friends are larger as well so they tend to "enable" straying from diets

    -OK for one, you need to DECIDE and COMMIT to getting results. If you are serious about burning 150lbs you need to make a statement about it to your friends and family so they understand when you reject the food they have to offer, period. If you go to social gatherings remember your commitment is more important than a temporary satisfaction.

    Whenever I'm doing my cuts I'll still go to social gatherings, but politely refuse any alcohol or food, and simply announce I'm on a cut, but thanks for offering.

    ALSO. I'm not sure if you've heard of the law (not a theory) of averages, but it states you are the average of the 5 people you spend the most time with, regardless of how much will power you think you have. This includes your annual income, your health, and many other factors in your life. If you want results, you need to change how much time you spend with certain people.

    (3) I have over 150 lbs to lose....so I often feel defeated before I start

    -You didn't gain 150lbs overnight, and you can't lose em' overnight. Understand it's small consistent daily action that will get you to where you want to be. Stop looking at the top of the mountain, or the finish line, and look down at the starting line, and take that first step, and the next step, every single day. A great book on this is "The Compound Effect" by Darren Hardy. Highly recommend.

    (4) I don't really enjoy cooking, especially after getting home from a long day at work - so I have fallen in the bad habit of quick processed food...

    -Then change your thinking to ENJOY cooking. You control how you feel. Your state is created internally, not externally. Your job doesn't make you tired, it's your boredom of your job that does. We're resilient creatures. We have limitless energy when we're fascinated with something, but throw a little monotony or boredom our way and it sucks the life out of us. Spice up your daily routine at work. Read books in your downtime at work that focus on helping you get results. Create a blog about your journey or a journal.

    Excite yourself to create more energy. Crack down and do the work in the kitchen. Start out with some simple meals that don't take long to cook, perhaps a shake in the middle to knock out another chunk of calories. Developing new habits isn't easy, but it's worth it.

    If you want different results, you have to do something different.

    (5) Exercise **sigh** - see # 3 above....very difficult indeed... As well, I have arthritis/sore joints. The doctor says it's OK to do exercise (but no direction of what to do) but I am nervous to try, so suggestions of "easy" to get started ideas are most certainly welcome (I don't have $$ for gym membership or personal trainers...)

    -A gym is your best option. Everyone has money for a gym. The money that's coming into your life needs to be allocated differently, what can you cut to allow the financial ability to spend $30-40 a month on your gym? Or a one time investment on a home workout like Power 90 / P90X etc?

    For optimal results, you'll want to do resistance training. Body weight exercises will be a good start like pushups on knees, dips, etc. Gyms have a good set of dumbbells and on site personal trainers to get you started. Cardio will be a dead end for you, but it can be helpful in addition to your resistance training.

    Craigslist has some steal deals on dumbbells as well.

    (6) and...probably like so many others - if I mess up or stray from a weight loss plan I let the guilt get to me and the little voices in my head say "Ahhh, you already messed up, so you might as well eat this too...." and it all falls apart in a downward spiral.

    -Then don't mess up! If you do, remind yourself that it's not the end of the world. It's what you do consistently. You can't gain weight overnight, or lose it overnight. It's all over an extended period of time.

    I'm hoping this time may be the charm - I'm just sick and tired of feeling sick and tired :-)

    - Are you really? I hear a lot of people say they're uncomfortable but actions speak louder.

    You have to compare the pain of not eating junk food, and not being sedentary, against the pain of not being in shape or living a healthy lifestyle.

    One of them will win. When your pain of where you are physically and mentally is greater than the pain of not eating garbage or starting a new exercise routine, THEN you will start moving towards your results.

    Don't say you want to be healthy though and justify why you aren't, be proud of where you are! It's too stressful otherwise! You can be fat and happy, or fat and unhappy and eventually healthy and fit. But don't live in perpetual fat / unhappy mode. That's just stress you don't deserve.

    Pick one, and be proud of your choice, and shout it from the rooftops.

    It's just like my mom, she's 56 and smokes a pack a day. Always tells me she wants to quit. "Haven't touched one in 2 days!" on millions of occasions right? I tell her "Mom, stop stressing about quitting! Enjoy your cigarettes! Smoke 2 at a time and tell everyone how much you LOVE smoking! Don't pretend you want to quit, you don't! You know the consequences of your actions and you're fine with it. So live it up!"

    Hope this helps. We don't know each other, but I know you have the ability to achieve your true desires and goals. You're so powerful, and I hope you realize that. Wish you all the best!

    PS: Surround yourself with fitness freaks, and spend little or no time with obese people, and I'll give you a $3 bill if you're not 150lbs lighter in 2014. My buddy Kevin Do started spending more time with me 11 months ago, and he lost 105lbs to date working out from his living room. You can do this!
  • Fitphobia
    Fitphobia Posts: 12 Member
    I think I probably have too over my life time
  • paulperryman
    paulperryman Posts: 839 Member
    Aqua Aerobics. low impact on the joints and is good for circulation. Swimming in general is equivalent to walking at a decent pace with some light weights on.

    My dad had to lose around 10Kg's after having quadruple stints put in. Swimming was an intrincal part of his recovery process as suggested by his doctors and heart trainers (forgot what they were called). He lost 8Kg's and did the Kakoda trail less then 1 year later and that was at the age of 64 he's now 67 and is at his plateau again, medication can have a huge impact to gaining and lowing weight too, heart/diabeties/arthritis medications can all have detrimental effects on being able to lose weight consult your doctor about alternatives or suggestions if you are on any of those..

    Personally i take 4mg hypertension tablets and some days i have more trouble working up a sweat and getting my heart rate into the zone when i started taking them my Heart Rate dropped about 10% from what it averaging b4 hand. Now i'm much lower again with almost 19Kilo's lighter/stamina and considerably better eating habits

    Another thing you could try is resistance Yoga, basically it's very low impact stretching and exercise that instead of going flat out you use your own resistance to act as weights against the moves you are doing.

    As for the weight, well it's like the Terminator, doesn't matter what you do it will keep coming to kill Sarah Connor (oops i mean find you), all you can do is hold it off or when it does find you, find ways to lessen it's impact
  • DebsDav
    DebsDav Posts: 16
    Don't say your losing weight cause it will find you, say you are shredding pounds. The older you get the harder it is to lose but it can be done. Good luck
  • Fitphobia
    Fitphobia Posts: 12 Member
    @ Jake - everything you say makes sense - guess maybe it's fear of the unknown as opposed to where I am...... Looking forward to Tuesday July 2nd when my cupboard has been filled with healthier food, I have handfuls of easy recipes, and have checked out some exercise options :-)
  • Fitphobia
    Fitphobia Posts: 12 Member
    Aqua aerobics.....that shouldn't be too hard on the joints :-) ..... I'll ask around if there are classes anywhere near here.
  • INxFOCUSx2013
    INxFOCUSx2013 Posts: 107 Member
    Hi, invest in a Leslie Sansone (walk at home) dvd. She has the 1 mile- 5 mile, it will be a good start for you, I'm currently doing her 1 mile walk....( walk away the pounds), it's achieveable & she motivates you & you don't need any equipment or alot of room. You can also borrow it from your local public library for free. Try it you will like it.
  • paulperryman
    paulperryman Posts: 839 Member
    really any exercise is better then nothing, you don't "Have" to exercise to be able to lose weight, it just speeds up the process and your motabolism amongst other benefits.

    PS i don't like cooking either, but you don't have to cook much to be able to eat healthier. Weight Watchers, Lite N Easy, Lean Cuisine meals are fine if only 1 of them a day (they contain alot of sodium so watch that), also just have boiled/steamed veggies, fruits and yoghurts more often

    the rest of the time it's not hard to cook basic meals that require almost no effort, infact the less you put into the cooking process probably the better anyway (with exception of cooking meats), and

    Chicken and Turkey are your go too meats. they are generally lower in salt and calories then red meats and contain more protein in the case of Turkey. and Almonds/Walnuts are a good source of fats and protein without the calories

    as for carbs, i swear by rolled oats they pack a punch on the energy levels (get your body burning) and contain very little salt and sugar unlike say Weatbix which contain moderate sugar and low salt but have a similar bang for your buck so to speak as Oats.
  • Olivia1977
    Olivia1977 Posts: 84 Member
    You don't have to go far. Just start by walking around your house. Anyone can do that! :):wink:
  • INxFOCUSx2013
    INxFOCUSx2013 Posts: 107 Member
    CoachJake can you be my coach I need someone like you.
  • Gigsluvscw
    Gigsluvscw Posts: 139 Member
    Hi, invest in a Leslie Sansone (walk at home) dvd. She has the 1 mile- 5 mile, it will be a good start for you, I'm currently doing her 1 mile walk....( walk away the pounds), it's achieveable & she motivates you & you don't need any equipment or alot of room. You can also borrow it from your local public library for free. Try it you will like it.

    I'm a Leslie Sansone fan also. I've got a few of her DVDs, but had heard.a few people mention on here that you can find some of her routines on YouTube. I live out in the country, my Internet reception isn't that great, so haven't had a chance took stream any yet.

    Also, it sounds like there are a great variety of different workouts on there (YouTube) also.

    Hang in there! You'll do great!
  • sympha01
    sympha01 Posts: 942 Member
    I'll try walking some (might start tonight) but worried about getting too far and not getting back (I'll make sure I take my cell phone). The knees can't handle the stairs right now, but maybe in time when the physiotherapist does her magic.

    Congratulations on your commitment to better health, we are all wishing you the best of success!

    If you have sore knees and joints, and because you are carrying lotsa extra weight (sister, no judgement here, I have the SAME PROBLEM!), DO NOT OVERDO IT your first time out from a misplaced sense of ambition.

    Make it just 15 minutes the first time out. If that goes well, add 5 or 10 minutes the next time, and the next, and so on. Don't go wandering off to see how far you get until you get tired the first time, that will ultimately only make you feel more defeated and hopeless. You want a positive experience, especially at first. Leave yourself HUNGRY FOR MORE EXERCISE the first time out, trust me. You're in this for the long haul.
  • Fitphobia
    Fitphobia Posts: 12 Member
    All great suggestions. I broke down last night and went and bought an iPhone - so I can download music to walk to plus have downloaded the mobile app for MFP - that way I should be able to enter food where ever I am instead of having to try to "remember" what I ate :-)
  • MiuNya
    MiuNya Posts: 38 Member
    I also find it very hard not to eat on social gatherings because mine ALWAYS involve nice food, like BBQs, Dinners in restaurants ect. and I can't just not eat, it would be weird, even when I get the healthy options I feel left out but

    I THINK maybe just if you cut down on social events that would be fine, and when you do go, find the healthiest option, for me, I stopped eating the burger buns and just ate salad on my burger meat. I only had one burger instead of two, which is all you need. I realized that I can live on hardly any food, I think everyone overeats without knowing, Look at your food and think. I dont need that extra few chips, I dont need that extra burger or one more helping. Its just our eyes talking.

    I recommend taking up Zumba in your own home. Look up zumba on youtube and theres tons of different videos and step by step break downs!
    well this user on youtube is called "lovezumba" and they have tons of videos on their channel, so i'd check it out...

    http://www.youtube.com/user/lovezumba

    At home go at your own pace. Every little helps, stand more. Go up the stairs more often, instead of sitting watching TV, stand and jog on the spot a little or march. I know your joints hurt but even a tiny bit every day can help! Take plenty rest if you get sore.

    Anyway I hope that helps, as a beginner myself I have no idea if any of this will help, everyone has different bodies and circumstances, so I hope you find what suits you, good luck!

    On the food, its easy to make stiry frys, and theres so many different combination, buy already chopped up fresh veggies and throw them in the pan with different flavours, you can google any stiry fry recipes easily, sub noodles, rice and pasta with the brown kind!

    Oh and DRINK LOTS OF WATER! :3 Im sure you knew that one!
  • phyllisgehrke
    phyllisgehrke Posts: 238 Member
    I sympathize with you completely
    I am 66 years old and just watch whatever I put in my mouth.

    I do not go over my 1200 calories and I do not eat back my exercise calories
    I used to do smart ones frozen dinners and have found lots of sodium.

    I do have a recipe for Southwest Vegetarian chili from Special K. I am going to make double batch and freeze in the freezer.

    I also have medical problems. I have degenerative arthritis in my neck and back and hips.
    I have bad knees, I have torn meniscus in both knees.
    I also have bursa in my heel on my left foot.
    I take Medication for Tachycardia and now I am photosensitive to the sun.

    I walk 30 mins a day, 20 mins in the am when sun is not so hot and 10 mins after the sun has gone down.
    I also do chair exercises for my abs.

    I have lost 14 pounds in 2 months.

    Good Luck in your Journey and you can always add me as a friend.
  • will127
    will127 Posts: 2
    hey bro i have tons of weight to lose also man from years of not eating right and living to eat not eating to live but as far as exercise goes . i just started walking . i have a county park near me with some hiking trails some short some long . at first it was tough . maybe set a weekly goal to go walking a few times a week . or build it up start out once a week then see how you feel . if it make you feel good ( as it did for me ) maybe the next week try and find time to go for a walk twice the next week .. i started doing this and changed my eating habbits about 5 months ago and im down 41 lbs so far . just remember this isnt a race itll take time to get the weight off but in the long run itll be worth it .. hope this helps