Trying to get back on track

Cortnizzle
Cortnizzle Posts: 26
in Motivation and Support
I was doing REALLY well. I had lost forty pounds. I felt good. I looked good. I was happy. But then my three year relationship started to really go downhill. I started going out more and eating out more and drinking more, just so I wouldn't be home with him. I cancelled my gym membership because I was spending so much going out, and I wasn't using it anyway. I slept in instead of doing my at home routine. Now I've gained back 30 and I can barely believe it. I am so miserable. I look at pictures of me now. I hate the way my clothes fit. Newly single and trying to date, I feel like I sabotage myself. I already set them up to not like me because I don't like me. I'm fortunate that I have found someone who I didn't push away because of my insecurities, but I still get very self conscious getting dressed. and I get very uncomfortable when we sleep. I don't want him to put his arms around me because he'll feel my fat. I really want to find my motivation again, but I just don't know how to go about it. Today I have started tracking again. hopefully I'll stick with it. I feel like crying. But we can only make decisions today, not yesterday so today I am promising myself to log EVERYTHING that passes my lips for 30 days.. Even if I go over. I need to see it. Maybe I will make better choices over the next thirty days

Replies

  • TheBitSlinger
    TheBitSlinger Posts: 621 Member
    I say all this in a gentle voice, without judgment. I have been where you are, time-and-time again.

    You WERE doing really well. Your statement about sabotaging yourself should have been your second sentence.

    You listed all the good things had from losing weight. You lost them, but you CAN get them back.

    You control how you spend your money. You can spend on eating out (more expensive and harder to lose weight doing so), or you can spend it on a gym membership. Planet Fitness, while not perfect, can cost as little as $10 a month.

    If he is with you, it is because he wants to be. Accept it and do not put limitations on it, however uncomfortable you feel.

    Log what you eat if it helps you; do not if it does not help you. Logging is only an accountability tool. But everything that passes your lips is controlled by you. Do not put a time limit on how long you will control it. Set goals that are realistic, measurable and achievable, but do not put time limitations on them; only focus on reaching the next goal, for that is all you can control.

    You do not have to overeat. Food can become an addiction, and it sounds like for you that it may be, but addictions can be beaten. I am addicted to overeating, but I am beating it, second-by-second.

    And you are 100% correct. Yesterday is gone; do not dwell there. Forget what is behind, and press on for the goal/prize in front of you.

    Make your decisions not day-by-day, by second-by-second. Plan were necessary, but control what happens immediately.

    I posted in this forum earlier today a thread called "Winning". Go read it. There is nothing that can overcome persistence and perseverance, especially not failures. In fact, those two traits will give you the power to refuse to fail.
  • Cortnizzle
    Cortnizzle Posts: 26
    Thank you! I am not trying to limit my goal to 30 days, but that was my first goal. maybe that was a little ambitious though. I think I'm going to reset it to five days and celebrate small victories more often. I haven't gotten a chance to read wining yet, but that's my next stop. Thank you for the encouraging words. It does help to hear it from someone else. it doesn't always have the same effect when I say it to myself because I have a tendency to dismiss myself. You are 100% correct in everything you said. Lol. We just had a mini intervention

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