Struggling to remain focused when I have so far to go still
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need2lose150lbs
Posts: 10 Member
I have been losing weight very well. Recently it has slowed down..... well stopped actually. I am eating about 1500 calories a day and try to move at least 4 times a week burning about 500 calories each workout. I still have 100 pounds to be at my ultimate goal weight. I am struggling with emotions. I keep thinking that I have so far to go and that I will never get there. I can't see where I have lost the weight and still hate to stare at myself in the mirror, all I see is a very obese ugly woman.
I don't want to give up on myself anymore. I feel the old destructive eating habits rearing its head. Has anyone ever felt like this? If so, how have you been able to deal with it and move past your emotions and lose the weight?
I don't want to give up on myself anymore. I feel the old destructive eating habits rearing its head. Has anyone ever felt like this? If so, how have you been able to deal with it and move past your emotions and lose the weight?
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Replies
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For me, when I've stopped losing weight or slowed, it's the knowledge that I've been doing well until now, plateaus are normal and I'll break through it eventually, that keeps me going.
Will it work for you not to think of it as one 100 pound block? Set mini-goals? I set my first goal at 20 pounds down, and the next one at 10 pounds down. It seems a bit more manageable that way.
It sounds like you're doing really well with your eating and exercise. I understand looking in the mirror and being really unhappy, but you've done so well (and ARE doing so well) that there's no reason to let the negative thinking win.0 -
When you have that much to lose, it will take a long time for your mind to catch up. I had lost about 85 lbs before I was finally able to look in the mirror and not think I was fat. The best advice I have on that issue is to take progress pictures. This is something I didn't do (not intentionally, anyway ... of course there are photos of me at various stages of weight-loss, but not half-naked, legit progress photos), and I think I would have been able to see and accept it mentally and emotionally if I had evidence of the changes.
As for losing your motivation, I just think that comes from losing sight of your goal. One thing that may help you get refocused is to change up your routine. Maybe pick a specific, short-term thing to train for, whether it's a race or a certain performance goal, like being able to run a 5k in under 25 minutes or being able to deadlift your body weight. This will give you a specific reason for working out, as opposed to the very vague goal of trying to lose weight.0 -
You are right. I have been thinking very negative. I don't see the good that I've done, only what I still need to do!
I struggle with seeing the good in me a lot. I constantly struggle with negative thoughts about myself. I am going through a lot emotionally, I am so scared of falling back into my emotional binge eating cycle. I have always been over weight and now feel that is my identity, and I feel comfortable with being fat.
I do need to think of my weight loss in a more manageable way, 5 or 10lbs at a time.
Maybe like a football field since I have 100lbs still to lose .... just have to get the 1st down
Thank you for your wonderful advice.0 -
When you have that much to lose, it will take a long time for your mind to catch up. I had lost about 85 lbs before I was finally able to look in the mirror and not think I was fat. The best advice I have on that issue is to take progress pictures. This is something I didn't do (not intentionally, anyway ... of course there are photos of me at various stages of weight-loss, but not half-naked, legit progress photos), and I think I would have been able to see and accept it mentally and emotionally if I had evidence of the changes.
As for losing your motivation, I just think that comes from losing sight of your goal. One thing that may help you get refocused is to change up your routine. Maybe pick a specific, short-term thing to train for, whether it's a race or a certain performance goal, like being able to run a 5k in under 25 minutes or being able to deadlift your body weight. This will give you a specific reason for working out, as opposed to the very vague goal of trying to lose weight.
First, congrats on your weight loss!
Thank you for your advice. I haven't taken any pictures of my progress thus far but, you've inspired me to do so. I am not totally crazy about the idea of any pictures of me, let alone half naked ones but I can see where it would help me see the REAL progress I am making. Thanks for sharing that after you lost 85lbs you were able to view yourself as not fat anymore.
You are right, I have lost sight of my goal. I am mainly losing weight for my health. The benefits of smaller clothes and self confidence will be wonderful too.
I need to re focus.
I just joined a 9K with my sister. It will be a challenge for me but maybe this is just what I need.
Thank you so much for your advice, I really appreciate it.0 -
Definitely set mini goals. I have over 100 lbs to lose as well. My ticker is set for my 2nd 10% goal. I have lost the first 10% body weight, I'm working on the next 10%. It's been slow going, but remembering this is a change to my lifestyle, not a diet helps. I'm learning to eat right for the rest of my life. I have set backs and times when I feel like its all pointless. I too have always struggled with my weight -so there is a lot of negative talk in my head. I just try to push it away and remember what I have achieved so far. Easier said than done sometimes, I know.0
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Try not to look at the end result... you can make yourself crazy that way ( from one who knows) LOL. What I do no is focus on my daily routine only.. NOT the end result. That way I can make every day a victory instead of seeing my "lack of progress" as a failure. One day at a time.. one meal at a time...one exercise routine at a time.... finsihs them and claim victory for that day...0
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Try not to look at the end result... you can make yourself crazy that way ( from one who knows) LOL. What I do no is focus on my daily routine only.. NOT the end result. That way I can make every day a victory instead of seeing my "lack of progress" as a failure. One day at a time.. one meal at a time...one exercise routine at a time.... finsihs them and claim victory for that day...
Love this! Thank you!0 -
What a great Idea to reset my ticker. Keeping my weight loss in smaller more manageable goals.0
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I understand how it can seem overwhelming. I try to remind myself time will pass more quickly than you think. You will wake up a year from now and be 100 lbs lighter if you just keep at it. Remember to be as flexible as you can and occasionally live a little. You need to find a balance you can live with. I still struggle somedays but just focus on moving forward. You are doing great and the 9K sounds like an awesome fitness goal.0
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You may be obese, but you are far far from ugly. You are quite lovely!
What helped me stay focused during my plateaus (which happens, they just do) is I began taking measurements. Even if the scale wasn't moving I could still see inch loss each month. It really helps psychologically to see that.
I swear by mini goals. I am all about beating this 10 lbs. I'm getting thru the 90s right now!
I'll be frank, old destructive eating habits are STILL with me. For all I know they always will. I still turn to food for comfort and in times of stress. I just try to do better. I return to healthy eating asap after a 'bad' phase. I plan events I know will trigger. For ex, on Sats I have a writing deadline by midnight. I'm not as likely to stress eat if I don't wait to the last minute to get it done. Of course, I am quite prone to waiting until the last minute. If Sat rolls around and I haven't written a thing I plan my meals to be low calorie-wise so there is room for munching while I'm writing. I try really hard to not look at 'mess ups' as "well I blew it of course yada yada", but think what can I learn from this? What could I have done diffly? What will I do the next time this situation arises?
You can do this. You are beautiful
I have been losing weight very well. Recently it has slowed down..... well stopped actually. I am eating about 1500 calories a day and try to move at least 4 times a week burning about 500 calories each workout. I still have 100 pounds to be at my ultimate goal weight. I am struggling with emotions. I keep thinking that I have so far to go and that I will never get there. I can't see where I have lost the weight and still hate to stare at myself in the mirror, all I see is a very obese ugly woman.
I don't want to give up on myself anymore. I feel the old destructive eating habits rearing its head. Has anyone ever felt like this? If so, how have you been able to deal with it and move past your emotions and lose the weight?0 -
Keep doing what you're doing...consider breaking your major goal into smaller milestones and look at your measurements instead of just focusing on the scale. You will get there, stay encouraged.
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Hey, we all pout and get down for a day or two. But, the last thing you want to do is ruin the progress you've made by feeling sorry for yourself. Really...we all understand and have been there. I say keep on track.. maybe quit weighing yourself for a while. Man, when the scale doesn't move it ruins my motitvation and is the perfect excuse to go off plan.
Keep with it... logic dictates that you'll break through your plateau..which is just part of the body catching up with the process...and you will start losing again.
REad the success stories everyday...those help too. you can do this!!0 -
It's hard for me to stay focused, I have lost 53 but I still have such a LOOOONG way to go. To me my weight loss isn't noticeable and every now and then I have a mini meltdown/pity party and wonder what is all of this hard work for? Then I remember how I felt 6 months or a year ago. I am not the same person I was when I started out to lose weight, and I didn't like the place I was in before. It seems like our brains lag behind our physical progress. I think we all need to hit the reset button in our brains every now and then. YOU know you have made progress, just take a deep breath and keep going, you can totally do it!
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I am feeling much the same as you at the moment, I have been doing so well, but the last few days have been very hard and I have been wanting to eat 'comfort' food and I don't know why. Although I have lost 2 stone I don't see any difference and am still wearing the same clothes.
I know its not a good idea to think I have so much weight to loose yet and try to aim for one pound a week weight loss.
I am going to take some of the advice that people have been giving you and concentrate on just one day at a time and get back to increasing my activity and hopefully will get the enthusiasm back as well.0 -
@ripemango- Thank you so much for sharing your struggles with emotional eating and that it stills rears its head sometimes. I keep thinking I shouldn't be feeling like this. After reading your comment I realized it will be a struggle for the rest of my life but I can manage it! I seriously feel like an addict with food at times. Your comments brightened my day and uplifted my spirit.
@1meremortal- Thank you, I will start taking measurements and not rely so much on the scale. Thanks for your encouragement!
@elisa123gal- Yep, the scale is going to be put away for awhile. You are right if I don't lose it becomes a great reason to get off plan. LOVE the idea of reading success stories everyday. Thank you!
@garber6th- Thanks for sharing your feelings. We sound like we feel the same way at times. I will have to remember how I felt before I lost the weight and the things that were more difficult for me to do. In fact you inspired me to make a list of then and nows to post on my fridge. Thank you.
@rdianemu- Congrats on your weight loss! You are right, before I know it a year will be gone. If I keep sticking to this I will be so much healthier and happier. In the moment it feels like you are making no progress but over time small things become BIG!
Thanks for helping me remember that!0 -
Focus less on that end result and the numbers on the scale. Focus on the process and becoming a healthier and more fit individual. Focus on learning how to eat properly and get your nutrition. Focus on your fitness. When you focus on these things, everything else falls into place...plus, when you focus on these things you actively learn how to feed yourself properly, so when you do get to maintenance, it's no biggie and you don't have to worry so much about the yo-yo effect.
Focus on the results and you rarely see the change; focus on change and you'll always see the results.0 -
Eat more. I eat more than 1500 a day with only 25ish to lose and I work out maybe 300 calories a day. You probably need to eat 1800 or so at least.0
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Focus on the results and you rarely see the change; focus on change and you'll always see the results.
Love it Thank you! 0 -
Eat more. I eat more than 1500 a day with only 25ish to lose and I work out maybe 300 calories a day. You probably need to eat 1800 or so at least.
I have thought about this too. I was going to up my calories but I am scared to do it. I am afraid if I do up it then I will gain weight. I want to lose 2lbs a week and MFP put my calories at 1250. I was starving at that so I uped it to 1500.0 -
A couple of things:
1 - mini goals (and rewards) are a great idea. I used 5 lbs a month even though my overall goal is 100 lb.
2 - take a look at your BMR; you have to be eating above that to lose weight.
3 - if you need to try eating more, add 100 caloroes per day and see what happens. You can't get too far off track that way.0
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