8 months of trying...fail...depressed, need help

howgoesyourlove
howgoesyourlove Posts: 22
in Introduce Yourself
I am Nikita from India aged 25.
I've been trying to lose weight since last 1 year...joined a gym, tried to track calories by making charts on excel and even tried all diets. But with fail. I lose 2 kgs and again get back to eating, gaining back what i had lost.

My job is very stressful and hence, i do a lot of emotional eating too. Sometimes, i feel i am never full (hungry all the time) :'(

Today, i just want to give up...my arms, stomach, waist...everything feels so heavy and yet i feel drawn to food...it's my support system and i feel i cant do without it :'(

is anyone out there facing the same thing? Does anyone have any tips, advice to break this chain... I've cried a lot thinking i wont ever eat again and then i get back to it...

Please help....thanks...
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Replies

  • jeremyw1977
    jeremyw1977 Posts: 505 Member
    How much are you trying to lose?
    Looking at your profile picture, you look like a nice-figured woman.

    What are your goals?
  • howgoesyourlove
    howgoesyourlove Posts: 22
    I wish to lose 6 kgs...I am 54 kgs and wish to reach 48 kgs... So, i should not consume more than 1100 calories in a day, but i easily end up having 1600 or more...

    Not when I am determined, but after one week, that determination goes away and i am back to old ways...
  • chunkydunk714
    chunkydunk714 Posts: 784 Member
    Its hard but you just have to pick yourself up and keep on truckin. Some days are better than others but I keep trying to remind myself that one day I will be the person I want to be if I just keep trying. Eventually I will get there :)

    You will too :)
  • Whipppets
    Whipppets Posts: 267
    I looked at your picture.. you are beautiful and look to be in great shape..If anything just tone if you want to feel fitter .
  • howgoesyourlove
    howgoesyourlove Posts: 22
    Thanks Chunky...
    I already feel slightly good...Shall definitely hit the gym tomorrow! Wrote this note when i was really depressed....
    I know it sounds so negative... Anyway, time to move on... :)
  • conniemaxwell5
    conniemaxwell5 Posts: 943 Member
    1100 isn't enough calories, especially if you are exercising. 1600 is probably close to what you should be eating if you are exercising. For that small of a weight loss goal, you should expect to lose about 1/2 pound a week (I don't know how many kg that is).
  • chunkydunk714
    chunkydunk714 Posts: 784 Member
    Thanks Chunky...
    I already feel slightly good...Shall definitely hit the gym tomorrow! Wrote this note when i was really depressed....
    I know it sounds so negative... Anyway, time to move on... :)

    Meh, dont worry about being negative. We all go through that some point in our lives. Some more extreme than others. Its all good...I understand because I've been there. Those that dont get it.....eff 'em.

    And yes, you are beautiful ma. Go to the gym and you will feel even better!
  • howgoesyourlove
    howgoesyourlove Posts: 22
    Hmmm...Is that the mistake I am doing? Let me see...Let me eat upto 1500 and not kill myself on it...
    Just be patient and consistent...Maybe it will take another year...but...sigh...so be it...
    Thanks dear...
  • AnnabellaMiniJarv
    AnnabellaMiniJarv Posts: 13 Member
    I have the same problem... I've found that the most important thing to remember is that when you eat something high calorie or you know you shouldn't of eaten (e.g. a chocolate bar) you shouldn't think you've ruined your diet for the day. Just because you make one slip up that doesn't ruin the rest of the day for you! Think about how you felt after that one and make better choices for the rest of the day. Do this one day at a time and you'll be ok! Also taking even just a 10 minute walk can make you forget about your cravings. Good luck!
  • howgoesyourlove
    howgoesyourlove Posts: 22
    Thanks a lot...really :)

    Much valued...but i have friends who are so skinny and look so good...So, you know what i feel :)
  • rosacarlos56
    rosacarlos56 Posts: 1
    Don't give up! I am a 52 year old woman who has been over weight most of her life. I have recently been diagnosed as diabetic and for the first time I've been really monitoring my food intake. I've lost 3 lbs in about 3 weeks. I'd recommend doing something like a diabetic diet since you are literally eating all day long and don't feel hungry. I've also added daily walking even if it's ony 15 minutes more than ususal. Your picture looks like you are a lovely young woman and I'm sure you will be successful.
  • howgoesyourlove
    howgoesyourlove Posts: 22
    OMG!
    This is so so true...this happens to me daily...

    By 5 o clock, i shall have one bar of chocolate or one packet of chips...and then the hogging starts never to stop...sigghh...Shall really keep this in mind :)

    Thanks
  • howgoesyourlove
    howgoesyourlove Posts: 22
    Thanks Rosa and take care dear... I shall personally encourage you daily :):)
  • SoDamnHungry
    SoDamnHungry Posts: 6,998 Member
    You weigh 54 kg...which is 118 pounds. You want to weigh 48 kg, which is 105 pounds. How tall are you? This is not likely a healthy weight for you.
  • WannabeStressFree
    WannabeStressFree Posts: 340 Member
    hi!

    I say simply stay away from foods you might not be able to control yourself around (sweets, salty, etc)

    Your goal is not too much, so weight loss will be slower- keep it up!

    I also want to give up many times but come back again, no other choice! I'm not quitting!

    best of luck!
  • sarahoffner24
    sarahoffner24 Posts: 5 Member
    You're doing great! We've all been there. Just pick yourself up and start over again! A trip to the market for healthy foods is usually how I start out for motivation!
  • cbuggy75
    cbuggy75 Posts: 23
    1100 calories and you workout too? Are you eating those calories back? If not, you should. I would assume eating 1100 calories and then going to gym to burn off 200-300 of that.....meaning your only giving your body 800-900 calories isn't nearly enough.
  • jeremyw1977
    jeremyw1977 Posts: 505 Member
    Hmmm...Is that the mistake I am doing? Let me see...Let me eat upto 1500 and not kill myself on it...
    Just be patient and consistent...Maybe it will take another year...but...sigh...so be it...
    Thanks dear...

    If you keep trying to adhere to an 1100 calorie regiment, and if you're going to be exercising as well, you are probably going to find your goals difficult to achieve.
    At your present weight, you are probably better off trying to maintain.

    You can try to do some light weight training in order to tone up, and that can help you burn any fat, although I find it tough to believe that you have much fat just sitting around.

    You might be obsessing too much about this, and I would hate to see someone adopting unhealthy practices.
  • sakuragreenlily
    sakuragreenlily Posts: 334 Member
    You weigh 54 kg...which is 118 pounds. You want to weigh 48 kg, which is 105 pounds. How tall are you? This is not likely a healthy weight for you.

    This is exactly what I was thinking...

    Unless you're shorter than 5'1" and have a very small frame you might be shooting a little low...
  • teenhamodic
    teenhamodic Posts: 43
    i think trying to go for 48kg (105lbs) to me seems unhealthy.

    trying for 8 months and only losing 2kg, well, you're not doing something right.

    coupled with that and your OP and thread title, something doesn't seem right psychologically...

    sorry to be the only negative person here but really... i think people above me need to do some math and not look at pictures to give advice sometimes...
    You weigh 54 kg...which is 118 pounds. You want to weigh 48 kg, which is 105 pounds. How tall are you? This is not likely a healthy weight for you.

    This is exactly what I was thinking...

    got there before me lol
  • howgoesyourlove
    howgoesyourlove Posts: 22
    I weigh 5 feet... and just wish to look good...
    Like my friends...
  • walkinthedogs
    walkinthedogs Posts: 238 Member
    This is one of the hardest things I have tried to do also. I try think of this as a life time/style change, not just a "diet". I am also an emotional eater and breaking those habits are really hard. Tracking my food helps so I know where I am, but what helps the most is drinking lots of water or other calorie free drinks and the biggest thing for me is when I feel hungry, I have a little talk with myself and it goes something like this - are you really hungry, as in actually need food, or are you just bored, lonely, sad, happy, restless (that's the biggest one for me). I eat for every one of those reasons and more, but when I am actually upfront and honest with myself (I like to fool myself regularly), I realize that mostly I just want to eat because of one of those feelings above. I then try to distract myself (not easy to do) and wait 15 minutes and realize I'm not hungry and I really don't want to eat, I really just want to be doing something other than work. When I'm busy doing things I love to do, I'm not near as hungry and that is why I know I am an emotional eater. I have only lost 2 pounds and have been trying to lose weight for 20 years, I've been successful before, but always gained it back also, so this is and has been a long struggle, but one I am determined to win and win soon. Counseling may help also, me that is, not necessarily you. I need to find out why FOOD became my best friend and I need to learn how to break that friendship up and use food for fuel for my body only. Not easy! Keep at it, we will win the battle of the bulge!
  • howgoesyourlove
    howgoesyourlove Posts: 22
    Well...I wrote what i was feeling...
    What doesnt seem right? Trying to become 48 for a 5 feet girl? well...anyway..

    And of course, i know i am not doing something right...i know i am eating too much...and hence the post...dont wish to defent myself, but just letting you know why the post...

    Thanks
  • jsjaclark
    jsjaclark Posts: 303
    Hang in there. I am right with you - right about the same weight and trying to lose just a few pounds. Maybe focus on toning versus trying to lose. It is definitely harder to lose when you don't have as much to lose.

    I do know that I tend to do better if I track my food every day (really makes me think about what I am putting in my mouth) and also if I can get in some exercise each day.
  • teenhamodic
    teenhamodic Posts: 43
    i think trying to go for 48kg (105lbs) to me seems unhealthy.

    trying for 8 months and only losing 2kg, well, you're not doing something right.

    coupled with that and your OP and thread title, something doesn't seem right psychologically...

    sorry to be the only negative person here but really... i think people above me need to do some math and not look at pictures to give advice sometimes...
    You weigh 54 kg...which is 118 pounds. You want to weigh 48 kg, which is 105 pounds. How tall are you? This is not likely a healthy weight for you.

    This is exactly what I was thinking...

    got there before me lol
    I weigh 5 feet... and just wish to look good...
    Like my friends...

    so referencing my post you have self-esteem issues. its not so much weight loss but self esteem - at 5 feet and going for 105lbs well... i guess being in india, i'm going to assume that any hint of muscle definition and you'll be considered a man? thats the impression i'm getting.
  • SoDamnHungry
    SoDamnHungry Posts: 6,998 Member
    I weigh 5 feet... and just wish to look good...
    Like my friends...

    Ok, if you're actually 5 feet tall, then 105 is an ok goal for you. I just wanted to make sure that you weren't aiming too low. =) Though right now, you're still a healthy weight.
  • howgoesyourlove
    howgoesyourlove Posts: 22
    Thanks a ton! I've copied and pasted this reply on my desktop sticky note :P
  • howgoesyourlove
    howgoesyourlove Posts: 22
    I feel so much better... Going to sleep with a positive mind...
    Tomorrow will be a new day :)
  • sam308lbs
    sam308lbs Posts: 1,936 Member
    i am in the same boat as you.i am sure most indian food is not even properly measured for its calorie content.Well all i can say is good luck and I will let you know the secret when i find out myself
  • wideeyedla
    wideeyedla Posts: 138 Member
    Pick one thing you will do differently THIS week, and do it. Just one. Whether it is going to the gym three times, taking a walk, researching some ways to replace unhealthy comfort foods with healthier options...whatever. Do it for a week. Next week, add another small goal.

    I did not develop my bad habits in a day, and some of them are really challenging. It doesn't seem so overwhelming when I tackle one thing at a time.

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