Starting to get discouraged...

I have been using MFP for just over three months (logged in for my 100th day in a row yesterday :smile: ) and I have lost 10 lbs in that time. If you count the week before I started MFP and was tracking calories on a piece of paper, I have lost 12lbs total. I started at 5' 7" (really if I am honest I am about 5' 6.75") 202lbs...the heaviest I have ever been in my 26 years of life...I am now down to 190.2. It is a good milestone and it felt really good to reach it because I have moved from the "obese" category into the "overweight" category...but I am still getting frustrated and discouraged....:frown:

I have been fluxuating between 190 and 192ish since 6/30 and have not lost any more weight...I was tracking measurements for a bit but I have lost my tape measure and have yet to replace it. I still have 40lbs to go to get to my goal weight and it is beginning to feel like an insurmountable goal! I'm fairly comfortable with calorie intake with where MFP has me set at 1540...around 1200 and I am starving and any more than that I can tell I am very full. I have my activity level set at sedentary because I do spend most of my day behind a desk and in front of a computer for my current job, but I walk a mile and half in 20-30 minutes every day on my lunch break and I have been working out at least 3 times a week. I go to Jazzercise class once a week, a TRX strength/weight training class + 30 minutes of cardio after, and at least one additional day of misc. cardio and caethencis...not to mention walking the dog and trying to be active on my days off...I recently got a Fitbit, and with the exception of when I was in the water this last weekend...I wear it all the time and I am hitting my goal of steps/miles and 2130 calories burned every day...I don't understand why I can't get off this plateau!

I know there are days I go over my calories...in fact I try to let myself have one "indulgent but not overly indulgent" day a week, or if I something special...like this last weekend I went camping with my family and ate bad for me food for about three days...but I was also very active and out on the boat in the water for 8+ hours doing water sports and swimming...I didn't actually track a ton of it because I didn't feel MFP was very accurate for what I was doing and I would rather not have an overestimation of calories. I will often cut down my workout minutes by about 1/2 to more accurately reflect what my Fitbit and the machines say I burned vs. MFP, which is also a reason I try not to eat back all my workout deficit. I consistently end my weeks 1,000 to 2,000 under my weekly goal (this most often includes workout deficit). Even with eating crappy last weekend I ended my week 700 calories under.

I am not really worried about sodium intake for the most part because we don't use additional salt at home (my other half has a kidney problem). So other that what may already be in the ingredients we use (and I try to buy low sodium everything/use salt-free substitutions) I don't see that as my issue...I'm either right at or under 2000 for sodium daily. I have replaced the actual sugar in our house with stevia, so I also don't add sugar to anything. I use whole grain breads and pastas at home, and I don't drink soda anymore (unless I have a super craving and then I have Zevia soda stashed in the cupboard). I drink tea (without milk) instead of coffee...I haven't had coffee for 7 years...I quit in college...I am sure I could completely cut out other procesed foods which is difficult since the love of my life can't live without his munchies (Darn you steriotipical men who can eat whatever they want and not gain a thing!) But I have really cut back on those things or try to make sure they fit within my calorie count daily since I do enjoy them in moderation and don't want to make myself miserable. I don't often eat back all of my exercise calories, and I try to stick to eating three meals and two smaller snacks daily.

It is hard for me to do, and is embarrasing in some ways, but I have opened my diary for those of you that want to take a peek. I have struggled a lot of my life with weight issues in one form or another, and it is hard for me to open myself up to critisim...even if it will be the constructive kind. I went through a period in highschool where I was borderline anorexic because of my low-self esteem issues caused by a family member who constantly questioned and critisized everything I ate/wore/and how I looked...the life of an athlete with an overbearing and controlling parent. (On a side note we have worked out a lot of our issues, and I love my parents very much...unfortunately the parent in question went through a very tough time while I was in highschool and I was the only thing they felt they had any control over...hurray for Therapy right?:ohwell: ) Then in college I turned to food as a source of emotional comfort when due to injuries I couldn't pursue the sports I loved any longer on a competitive level. After college, I got into a career that while emotionaly rewarding (I was a resident care coordinator for a senior living community) it did not help my health or eating habits at all...I used to just eat when and whatever I could because I never had time for a real meal or to cook.

Now I am in a job that allows me to have a family life, and time to take care of myself...but I need help. I really want to get to a point where I like looking at myself in the mirror, and I seem to be stuck in limbo land. I know some people will say that 12lbs in three months is a good and healthly rate to lose weight but I am only set to lose 1lb a week through MFP settings, and I haven't even been doing that since the end of June. I am eating too much? I am not eating enough? Am I too concerned and being a drama queen:grumble: ? Any constructive help/suggestions are appreciated.

Replies

  • Greenrun99
    Greenrun99 Posts: 2,065 Member
    A few weeks isn't really a plateau, but try eating what MFP tells you cause even though you sit behind a computer sounds like you are active outside of that.. So I would do that and see
  • Francl27
    Francl27 Posts: 26,371 Member
    First, if your fitbit says 2100ish (same as mine), eat more. 1600-1700 is a good start, considering it doesn't really register any weight or strength training you do.

    Then, well, after the initial lose, I've only lost weight one week a month. So I get 3 weeks 'plateaus' all the time. It's not really a plateau unless your weight doesn't move at all for 2 months... give it time.
  • iris8pie
    iris8pie Posts: 224 Member
    I'm in a very similar boat! Been stuck at 191- 193 for ever it seems. Excercising 2 hours a day f5 days a week... Very discouraging, but do you feel better? Can you feel your body changing? I'm trying to ignore the scale for now, and just focus on how good I'm feeling because I'm afraid I'll give up if I keep seeing no change on the scale *hugs*
  • lillivewire87
    lillivewire87 Posts: 103 Member
    A few weeks isn't really a plateau, but try eating what MFP tells you cause even though you sit behind a computer sounds like you are active outside of that.. So I would do that and see

    I guess plateau is really the wrong word...I know there are those out there who are stuck at the same weight for months at a time...but it is a halt in forward progress. For the first 80 days I was seeing a 1-2 lb drop a week, and I guess seeing it stuck at the same number for a couple of weeks is just messing with my head.

    I do try to eat the full 1540 calories it gives me each day...otherwise I feel like a bear that just came out of hibernation.

    @iris8pie I do have more energy for sure and thank you for the hugs...I guess I am justing having difficulty actually seeing results with my eyes either on the scale or in the mirror and my mind doesn't believe that I am doing good...I think part of me gets so tangled up in numbers because as an athlete my life always felt like a "that's great but you can do better/run faster/go longer/place higher". I try not to do that to myself anymore and be happy with who I am and what I do...I know it took years to put on and will take time to come off but it is so hard to not let myself get discouraged. I try not to weigh myself more than once a week to keep the fluxations from messing with me...but it is hard to resist the siren call when the scale is there on my bathroom floor every morning shining in all it's evil glory...
  • silken555
    silken555 Posts: 478 Member
    You really, really need to go get yourself a tape measure again. Weight is only one very small part of the equation and if you're as self competitive as you seem to be, you'll need it for when that scale doesn't move. Good luck to you. The journey is not an easy one but understand that you're already victorious in having started it in the first place...*hugs*
  • CoachDougW
    CoachDougW Posts: 12
    @lillivewire87 - The first thing I would say is BREATHE! 12 lbs lost is nothing to shake your head at, you've done well so far! :) Be proud of yourself!

    Find your tape measure, or get a new one - relying on the scale as your only measurement is a sure-fire recipe for discouragement! It's very common for our bodies to lose weight in the first few weeks of a new exercise or nutrition plan, then get confused and hang on to what it has for awhile. No, the calories in vs calories out equation doesn't account for that, but then ... that's the flaw in the sometimes oversimplified calories in vs calories out debate.

    Sometimes WHAT we eat is as important as how MUCH we eat (despite the calories in vs calories out hoopla) - to break a mini-plateau at 3-6 weeks of a new plan, I would suggest changing things up just a little bit:

    Improve the quality of the foods you're eating (it looks like you know of a few things that fit into your calories, but not necessarily your idea of quality nutrition) - replace those foods with something better quality, but of a similar macronutrient profile.

    Change up your exercise routine a little bit. Maybe walk farther than usual a few days, or if you're capable of it jog a little instead. Play on the monkey bars, play frisbee or basketball - do something physically that you don't normally do.

    Watch your stress levels - extra stress (even about your weight) can easily stop the scale from changing!

    Make sure you're getting enough sleep and hydrating properly. 7-8 hours is a good target range for sleep, and for simplicity sake - weight/2 = oz of water to shoot for in a day. (MANY people fail at one of these two.)

    Lastly - based on what you said for your exercise routine, and calories in.. personally, I would bump your daily calories up by 100-150 for a week or two and see what happens. In my experience, this is the least likely understood change you could make, and the most frequently successful (for long term loss) - and make sure your food is nutritionally dense, not just low calorie!

    Keep your head up lillivewire - part of the struggle is to learn as we go! Adapting to what we learn is the key to long-term success (vs those who 'ZOMG I LOOSED 28 LBS IN A MONTH!!!!!" and gained 25 lbs back 2 weeks later) You're doing just fine! :)
  • JessicaZen
    JessicaZen Posts: 149 Member
    I feel for you and understand what you are going through although I have not been working out like I normally do because of the heat I have been tracking my calories and I have been up and down the same 3-4 pounds for the last few months. yes it is very discouraging but like you said it didn't come on overnight and the worse part is it takes forever and even harder work to get of just one pound as you have found out. this is a long journey and has a lot of hills that we must struggle over but you can do it. you seem to be at the right place mentally and are extremely active just try and be patient and let things happen as they will don't give up cuz then all your hard work will go to waste hugs to you and good luck.
  • Becca1637
    Becca1637 Posts: 38 Member
    Also remember that muscle weighs more than fat so even though you aren't budging on the scale, I'm sure you are more fit and don't even realize it. That tape measure is key. Don't obsess over it though. I lost weight a few years ago and I found that by doing my weight and measurements once a month I don't obsess like I did when I was doing it daily or weekly. Good luck with your journey.
  • 1PatientBear
    1PatientBear Posts: 2,089 Member
    muscle weighs more than fat

    No it doesn't. It's denser, but it doesn't weigh more.
  • gpstrucker
    gpstrucker Posts: 930 Member
    Patience. Focus more on living a healthier lifestyle and the weight will take care of itself. The fit of your clothing will be a huge indicator of your progress.

    I remind myself of this in what you may consider an odd way. I have a pair of boxer shorts that fit me a year ago. Every once in a while I will try them on and find they are WAY too big for me and won't even stay up. I know, a bit odd, but it serves to remind me of the change since a year ago.

    Try to adopt the positive idea of living a healthy lifestyle and drop the negative idea of dieting. It seems like a small thing but it can make a huge difference. I haven't bothered to weigh myself in months, I just keep buying smaller clothes.
  • Journey2newwomen
    Journey2newwomen Posts: 31 Member
    muscle weighs more than fat

    No it doesn't. It's denser, but it doesn't weigh more.

    BLAH BLAH BLAH:yawn: I get so tired of hearing this. You know what she means.
  • born2drum
    born2drum Posts: 731 Member
    A few weeks isn't really a plateau, but try eating what MFP tells you cause even though you sit behind a computer sounds like you are active outside of that.. So I would do that and see

    I guess plateau is really the wrong word...I know there are those out there who are stuck at the same weight for months at a time...but it is a halt in forward progress. For the first 80 days I was seeing a 1-2 lb drop a week, and I guess seeing it stuck at the same number for a couple of weeks is just messing with my head.

    I do try to eat the full 1540 calories it gives me each day...otherwise I feel like a bear that just came out of hibernation.

    @iris8pie I do have more energy for sure and thank you for the hugs...I guess I am justing having difficulty actually seeing results with my eyes either on the scale or in the mirror and my mind doesn't believe that I am doing good...I think part of me gets so tangled up in numbers because as an athlete my life always felt like a "that's great but you can do better/run faster/go longer/place higher". I try not to do that to myself anymore and be happy with who I am and what I do...I know it took years to put on and will take time to come off but it is so hard to not let myself get discouraged. I try not to weigh myself more than once a week to keep the fluxations from messing with me...but it is hard to resist the siren call when the scale is there on my bathroom floor every morning shining in all it's evil glory...

    Maybe you need to push yourself more? Our body's muscle memory makes it harder to burn the same amount of fat/calories as it gets used to any particular work out. What used to burn 500 calories may now only burn 400 or so just as an example. Maybe you need to lift? Maybe you need to eat more? It's really hard to pinpoint something in particualr but you are obviously eating too much and not moving enough if the weight doesnt come off or you are gaining muscle mass?
  • Stay2theC
    Stay2theC Posts: 22 Member
    I have a couple of questions.. How many pounds are you trying to lose a week? Are you drinking water? If so, are you drinking the recommended amount of water?
  • lillivewire87
    lillivewire87 Posts: 103 Member
    Sometimes WHAT we eat is as important as how MUCH we eat (despite the calories in vs calories out hoopla) - to break a mini-plateau at 3-6 weeks of a new plan, I would suggest changing things up just a little bit:

    Improve the quality of the foods you're eating (it looks like you know of a few things that fit into your calories, but not necessarily your idea of quality nutrition) - replace those foods with something better quality, but of a similar macronutrient profile.

    Make sure you're getting enough sleep and hydrating properly. 7-8 hours is a good target range for sleep, and for simplicity sake - weight/2 = oz of water to shoot for in a day. (MANY people fail at one of these two.)

    Lastly - based on what you said for your exercise routine, and calories in.. personally, I would bump your daily calories up by 100-150 for a week or two and see what happens. In my experience, this is the least likely understood change you could make, and the most frequently successful (for long term loss) - and make sure your food is nutritionally dense, not just low calorie!

    Keep your head up lillivewire - part of the struggle is to learn as we go! Adapting to what we learn is the key to long-term success (vs those who 'ZOMG I LOOSED 28 LBS IN A MONTH!!!!!" and gained 25 lbs back 2 weeks later) You're doing just fine! :)

    A big thank you to everybody. Your kind words and motivation mean so much. My man...though very loving and wonderful is not the greatest motivator in the world, and none of my close friends have ever struggled with weight the way I do. I have dug through posts on here for days, and I finally just decided to post something hoping it will help get me out of my rutt...emotionally and weight-loss wise. I guess practicing patience is a little rusty for me and I just need to keep working on my emotional and physical well being...and find the darn tape measure!

    And a extra-special thank you to CoachDougW...I really appreciate all your suggestions...it is a place to start!

    So, to answer a couple of questions and ask some more of my own...<insert Star Wars quote about needing help here>

    I have a 20oz waterbottle that I fill (and drink) three times a day +2-3 cups of tea in the morning. I am horrible about actually remembering to log my water intake. According to the formula you gave I should be drinking 4.75 of these...I kinda feel if I did that I would float away? Should I really be drinking more than 60oz?

    Good sleep is still a work in progress...after 3+ years of being on call 365/24/7 and working 90+ a week...my body is still just figuring out 6 months later that it can sleep and rest at normal times.

    From all the posts I have been reading, increasing calorie intake is a common suggestion...but most of those people that have posted seem to only be eating around 1200 calories a day. My fear is that since I am already at 1540 any more of an increase would send me backward? Being on a weight loss hiatus sucks, but I don't want to gain....I am set for 1lb a week but honestly I wouldn't mind less as long as it was forward progress...

    Do you have suggestions of foods I might add or replace in my diary. Nutritionist I most definately am not and something I think is good ...I have been trying to find lower calorie replacements for everything...is probably something that I shouldn't actually count as "good for me". I have been trying to be more concious of lables/ingredients, and have purged our freezer of anything microwaveable...much to the consternation of my man, but he is dealing since he knows how much it means to me to lose weight. We still have some snack food around the house that I try to avoid or have in moderation beacuse I don't want to take everything away from him that he enjoys....and every once in awhile I just need a cookie. I have been taking a multi-vitamin (that I don't always remember to log) and been taking a Whey Protien supplement almost every day too...there is so much conflicting informaton about high protien vs. low carb vs. low fat. vs. paleo, etc and I am so confused....so I have just been sticking to staying at or below my calories.

    Thank you all again!
  • CoachDougW
    CoachDougW Posts: 12
    ...and find the darn tape measure!

    ^This! :)
    And a extra-special thank you to CoachDougW...I really appreciate all your suggestions...it is a place to start!

    Pleasure to help - hopefully you can use the many suggestions you can get from all the people here and get back on track. Most of all, don't give up! You'll have to change your game, but if you keep playing you WILL eventually win!
    So, to answer a couple of questions and ask some more of my own...<insert Star Wars quote about needing help here>

    I have a 20oz waterbottle that I fill (and drink) three times a day +2-3 cups of tea in the morning. I am horrible about actually remembering to log my water intake. According to the formula you gave I should be drinking 4.75 of these...I kinda feel if I did that I would float away? Should I really be drinking more than 60oz?

    You are winning, simply for the Star Wars reference...

    There is a lot of information out there on how much water is right/wrong. Unfortunately, like most info on the internet, it's mostly bullcrap. In reality, the weight/2 estimate is a good one simply because it makes people shoot higher than they currently believe they need. It's a lot easier to drink too little water than too much - I suggest bumping up your water intake and see how it works for you. I wouldn't go below where you currently are. Personally, the more water I drink, the better I feel.
    Good sleep is still a work in progress...after 3+ years of being on call 365/24/7 and working 90+ a week...my body is still just figuring out 6 months later that it can sleep and rest at normal times.

    That... sounds stressful!
    From all the posts I have been reading, increasing calorie intake is a common suggestion...but most of those people that have posted seem to only be eating around 1200 calories a day. My fear is that since I am already at 1540 any more of an increase would send me backward? Being on a weight loss hiatus sucks, but I don't want to gain....I am set for 1lb a week but honestly I wouldn't mind less as long as it was forward progress...

    In my experience, 9 out of 10 people who are eating at 1200 calories per day (for an extended amount of time) will ultimately plateau, then start gaining weight again. It's a metabolism killer, and when your metabolism slows down to that caloric intake rate, you'll see your body gain fat faster than ever before. 1200 = plateau eventually = gain most of it back faster than you lost it. The alternative: A lifetime of munching rabbit food and being forever stuck at a plateau HIGHER than what you envision for your ideal rate. In other words, never being satisfied. IMO, eating 1200-1500 calories is a constant battle of willpower. And willpower will always win out eventually.

    Yes, if you go from 1540 to say 1700, you'll possibly gain a little WEIGHT at first (water), possibly even for a few weeks. Then your body will adapt and kick into gear, most likely. If not - well now you know that a few more calories may not be the correct choice, and have reset your body to respond better if you drop calories down again. It's a win/win (although a bit of a delay in the longterm, but this isn't a sprint right?)
    Do you have suggestions of foods I might add or replace in my diary. Nutritionist I most definately am not and something I think is good ...I have been trying to find lower calorie replacements for everything...is probably something that I shouldn't actually count as "good for me". I have been trying to be more concious of lables/ingredients, and have purged our freezer of anything microwaveable...much to the consternation of my man, but he is dealing since he knows how much it means to me to lose weight. We still have some snack food around the house that I try to avoid or have in moderation beacuse I don't want to take everything away from him that he enjoys....and every once in awhile I just need a cookie.

    In a nutshell - we're all intelligent enough to recognize what is REALLY food, and what isn't. The fewer the REAL ingredients, the lower the quality of the food. Chicken, for example, IS an ingredient - if you buy chicken that has more than that, well it's becoming a science project, right? Deep down, we all know what we need to eat - it's just hard to admit, and harder to DO. So, as Yoda would say... Do or Do not, there is no Try. ;) Until then:

    :Make sure you switch from white to whole grains for pasta, bread, rice, etc. The whiter it is, the more processed it is.
    :Watch your ingredients for High Fructose Corn Syrup - my personal preference: Avoid it like creepy guy in the theater!
    :Choose lean proteins: chicken, turkey, lean pork, egg whites, fish
    :Fat is your FRIEND! Eat your healthy fats (be aware of the higher calories though) - olive/coconut oil, avocado, fish, nuts, seeds
    :Vegetables are good for you. Seriously. It amazes me how many people want to be healthier or leaner, but refuse to eat veggies!
    I have been taking a multi-vitamin (that I don't always remember to log) and been taking a Whey Protien supplement almost every day too...there is so much conflicting informaton about high protien vs. low carb vs. low fat. vs. paleo, etc and I am so confused....so I have just been sticking to staying at or below my calories.

    Consider it this way - paleo, primal, low carb, high protein etc - however you want to say them. It's a preference, not a necessity. Some people thrive on a particular nutrition plan, some people fail on the same plan. Ultimately, the goal is to find what works for you. For most people I recommend starting simple - fix what you KNOW is broken before trying to rework how you're playing the game. If you're eating Twinkies instead of veggies, well trying to go primal isn't going to work for you - make the small change (more veggies, less cakey tubes of doom) THEN consider your preference. Ignore them for now.

    Unless you have a very well thought out reason for whey protein (like, "my doctor said I'd die without it!") - odds are, you probably don't need it, imo. Most people drink whey protein when they don't need it, and/or supplement with it incorrectly anyway.

    And - as somebody mentioned above, I can't stress this enough LIFT SOME WEIGHTS! If nothing else, do some bodyweight exercises - pushups, pullups, squats, lunges ... add some to your routine, your body will love you for it (once the soreness goes away.)
    Thank you all again!

    Good luck lifewire87! Hope we've helped! Remember this, if nothing else: Don't give up!

    Feel free to message if you have any other questions or anything. Doug
  • soccerdog693
    soccerdog693 Posts: 73 Member
    muscle weighs more than fat

    No it doesn't. It's denser, but it doesn't weigh more.

    Yes, it does. A cubic foot of fat weighs less than a cubic foot of muscle.....
  • Melwith9
    Melwith9 Posts: 17
    It seems to me like you have done a good job keeping your calories low.. but looking through a few of your days I notice you aren't eating your calories.. some days being under 1000 calories. That could be doing you in for sure.. I also would agree that WHAT you eat is every bit as important as how much.. so my suggestion would be to try to *clean up* your diet a bit. find healthier whole foods to swap things out with.

    This was a really good list.
    "Make sure you switch from white to whole grains for pasta, bread, rice, etc. The whiter it is, the more processed it is.
    :Watch your ingredients for High Fructose Corn Syrup - my personal preference: Avoid it like creepy guy in the theater!
    :Choose lean proteins: chicken, turkey, lean pork, egg whites, fish
    :Fat is your FRIEND! Eat your healthy fats (be aware of the higher calories though) - olive/coconut oil, avocado, fish, nuts, seeds
    :Vegetables are good for you. Seriously. It amazes me how many people want to be healthier or leaner, but refuse to eat veggies! ""

    I will say that i have had way more success when I tossed the fat free stuff and just ate less of the full fat (example..greek yogurt)..adjust your calories to fit.. and veggies veggies veggies!!
  • CoachDougW
    CoachDougW Posts: 12
    Good point about the fat free foods Melwith9! I've seen a lot of people do better on regular food (in the right quantities) than "diet" or "fat free" food. Same goes with sugar vs artificial sweetener.

    Honestly, if they have to alter/process something from it's most natural state, in order to reduce the calories or sugar - it's probably something you shouldn't eat in the first place (or at least not frequently).
  • crystalc27
    crystalc27 Posts: 51 Member
    well i've only lost 13 lbs since i started mfp which was about 76 days ago. I would your doing fine on weight loss journey. You can't. expect to just drop the ponds so quicly ,it takes time and patience
  • lillivewire87
    lillivewire87 Posts: 103 Member

    Good luck lifewire87! Hope we've helped! Remember this, if nothing else: Don't give up!

    Feel free to message if you have any other questions or anything. Doug

    Thank you so much...I feel better because you have given me a direction to start and don't feel quite so lost!

    I bumped my settings up today to lightly active and we shall see how 1710 calories is treating me in a couple weeks.

    Never tell me the odds! Because I will navigate this asteroid field!
  • 1PatientBear
    1PatientBear Posts: 2,089 Member
    muscle weighs more than fat

    No it doesn't. It's denser, but it doesn't weigh more.

    Yes, it does. A cubic foot of fat weighs less than a cubic foot of muscle.....

    That's true because, again, the muscle is denser. A pound is a pound is a pound.