Mom offered gastric sleeve!

You mom's heart is in the right place, so please don't be mad at her. This is an incredibly personal decision. I had gastric bypass surgery 10 years ago and have done great....not a single regret. I would make sure that if you consider surgery, do take into consideration that you are of child bearing age, and that needs to be discussed with your doc. Extreme weightloss during pregnancy is not a good thing.

Only you can make the decision. Go to the consultation and then see how you feel after that. Make sure the surgeon is from a Center of Excellence program. I had gastric sleeve WLS on 6/11/12. I lost 47 pre op and have lost 99 post op for a total of 146 pounds lost. My only regret is that I waited till I was 48 years old to have the surgery. I had been obese all my life. I weighed 11 pound when born and have been fat my entire life till now. It is a serious surgery. It is surgery done on your stomach and not your head so if you have head hunger issues those need to be worked on pre op. It isn't taking the easy way out and is hard work when loosing the weight and when maintaining the weight loss. I can eat anything and do not have issues. I can go out to eat and just eat small portions and take the rest home for 2 more meals. I didn't have any complications. Make sure your program has a nutritionist that works with pre op and post op. A bariatric physical therapist to help you with exercise pre op and post op. A pysch. who will work with you on head hunger and food issues pre op and post op. A surgeon that you see pre op and post op and for the rest of your life. A program that does labs on you at 1 month post op, 3 months post op, 6 months post op, 1 year post op and then yearly post op. A program that if you have an issue after surgery will see you ASAP. It took me 2 months to get team approval to get my insurance paper work and get a surgery date. I would be leary of programs that give you a sugery date right away. Many issues need pre op work done to make you successful post op.
Good luck!

that is a drastic step. keep doing what you do. look at some youtube surgeries and see its not a fun procedure and it messes up everything in your system...its best not to do it.

So many things others have said are so very true. Don't be upset by your mom, she loves you and is offering to help, its what we do. This is your personal decision, there is no right or wrong answer here, its completely up to you. Do the research. The consultation isn't a bad idea, it will give you information. It may not be the best time for you. Maturity may really play a factor here.

For myself, I did the gastric bypass 8 years ago. Did great, for years. Then, had a high stress year, abused the tool I had and gained back 60% of my weight. So here I am again. There is a whole group on MFP dedicated to those whom have regained after WLS.

Some advice if you decide to go forward. Get into a support group, there are a lot of emotional reasons why we eat, and the WLS won't fix that. Research your surgeon well. Get stats, how many complications have they have with their patients? Have they ever lost one due to complications of the surgery. Not all surgeons are created equal.

I agree with many of the posters - don't be *upset* by your mom, but maybe see this as a wake up, as a point of discussion with her ( you say that she also has weight problems, maybe you can work on this together?)

My gut feeling is no, but here us my suggestion: take a year, dedicate this year to becoming a healthier * you*. Read up on what you need to do for this journey. This web site has great advice and support. Find a good and exercise combo that works for you. And just do it. But *really* do it - be focused and committed, log everything, etc. At the end of one year, you can revisit the surgery option. Remember- surgery is not a one time fixit tool, it will mean a life time commitment anyway, with the possible added complications that surgery could bring

You asked for advice, here it is from someone who did the deed.

Let me start off by saying that I come from this mental stance: I alone pay my bills, care for my two children and make decisions relative to my life and lifestyle, day in and out. There is no one on this site or in real life who is going to do that for me. Thus, a decision to have/not have a VSG, was mine alone. Other people's opinions did not hold water with me any more than they would have had I been getting a boob job, a tummy tuck or a face lift.

So, I took all the pro's and cons into consideration prior to surgery. Before deciding, I talked with the best WLS surgeon in the bay area, I talked with other people who had had the surgery (and/or other surgeries) and I read a lot of UNBIASED material related to WLS. I looked at my own set of circumstances (declining health issues that were no joke) and then I decided to have the surgery. I paid for it myself. I followed my doctor's orders. Here are the ongoing results.:

1. I lost 125 pounds in 10 months, the first year. I had no complications from surgery then or ever.
2. In three years, as PREDICTED by my doctor, I gained 10 pounds. Most of it is muscle weight, and you'll see why in a moment
3. I run 20-30 miles a week, every week, regardless of weather or work travel. I only run outside. I also do yoga once a week and a weight lifting class once or twice a week, work permitting. I have taken to running 1/2 marathons and am training for a full right now.
4. I have been at the same clothing size for over 3 years now. I like the size. It works for me.
5. I am super healthy (based on yearly blood work and tests). I watch what I eat and I eat everything in moderation. Nothing is off limits unless I say it is because I know it's something that isn't in line with the lifestyle I want to lead.
6. I do not have excess skin issues, though my abs could use some firming. I also have had two ten poundish children so I'm never going to have the abs of a teenager again and I don't care. They look good enough in my eyes and they are improving with the weight lifting class.
7. I am restricted in how much I can eat at any one sitting. I am not restricted in how often I can eat or what I eat. As such, I watch it like everyone else. I couldn't care less that I eat less in one sitting than the person next to me. Why that would be a concern is beyond me. I do eat at least 1680 calories a day and over 2000 calories on days I put in high mileage runs.

Having surgery is YOUR decision and shouldn't be something that people scare you out of, or give you advice on based on personal opinion. That includes me. You'll see I haven't recommended you to have/not have it. That's up to you. I'm just telling you that everyone is NOT a failure at WLS, everyone does not have horrendous complications and there are people like me who had their heads in the right place prior to surgery and the surgery is something they would do all over again, given the circumstances. Could I have made other decisions? YEP. I did make those decisions for years and years prior and had varying results that did not last. Again, it was MY decision. Just like this is YOURS.

Good luck whatever you do!

Regardless of what your decision is, please keep in mind that these operations are not the CURE ALL to obesity... it is an aid. It will help you get to your goal weight, but will not help you stay at that weight if you do not learn to eat right and exercise. I am a firm believer in that all weight loss operation candidates should have to go through a miminum of 6 months' worth of behavior modification classes to learn how to eat properly and to handle what ever their overeating triggers are so they can cope with these issues post surgery. I know people who have gone through these surgeries (one person actually went through it twice within 5 years' time...and has since regained all the weight lost) and it makes me very angry that doctors will still go ahead and perform these procedures without addressing the psychological aspects as well as as the physical. These surgeries, in my opinion, are nothing more than a band aid fix for an issue that has much deeper roots.

I am willing to bet that if a candidate were required to go through that minimum 6 months' worth of behavior modification, they will find that they really don't need the surgery after all ...just my opinion

Thanks for you opinion. I am considering the gastric sleeve also. Have had my first consult and waiting for my primary care MD to send the required letter on need to the surgeon. I am 60 with weight of 231. I have been over weight all my life and yes, I feed the sleeve is cheating but if you are my age and have tried all your life, then I think it is time to cheat! I would like for you to connect with me on facebook if you will and join in my progress. I would be very interested in following you also. Juanita_mcspadden@yahoo.com

Go stand in front of a mirror, look yourself in the eye and start talking to yourself. I'm serious. Have a conversation with yourself.

Are you really so lost that you need to take this step? Is this how you thought things would turn out when you were a little kid?
It's not about cheating or anything like that, it's about undergoing a serious medical procedure which will affect you for the rest of your life. Wouldn't it be easier to eat less and move more?

I'm really trying not to be mean here but this surgery is so extreme and most people aren't saying this. Unless you have a serious eating disorder where you cannot control your urge to eat then it is much healthier and better for your psyche in the long run to make small steps and slowly but surely change your lifestyle around.

Since you mentioned a miscarriage (and yes, many cannot be explained)- are you considering pregnancy again in the future? I'm sure not an expert on the subject but if you are, your research should also include a lot of questions about pregnancy (and possibly breastfeeding) after bariatric surgery. Since you need to take in more calories, and nutrient-dense calories during pregnancy, you'd want to find out if that's possible.

You are doing great!!! I was right where you were at last November, just keep pushing forward and you will get there without the sleeve or any drastic surgery.

I had gastric sleeve done July 15th. Trust me this is an aid not a cheat. I have been over weight since I was nine and I am now 44. Research it talk to your doctor but don't ever think this is the easy way out. To be successful you have to change your attitude about food even with this. You can lose the weight but if you don't stick to the program you can gain it all back again. I know I have seen my sister do it with gastric by-pass.