How should I tell my parent I'm a flexitarian?

tachma15
tachma15 Posts: 6 Member
in Health and Weight Loss
To whomever is reading this message,

I have been following a flexitarian diet since early July. I am afraid of telling my father about my new diet, since he finds a diet 'lacking in meat' to be unhealthy. (Before I became a flexitarian, I would eat two to three plates of food for each meal. Then after eating my meals, I would still feel hungry.) For the past two weeks, my father has been teasing me. (He keeps telling me that I will get ulcers. What is ulcers anyway?) Right now, he suspects that I am a vegetarian.

How should I tell my father about my new diet?

P.S., Another reason why I became a flexitarian is because I am concerned with my body image. (My father teases me about my body image. It makes me feel very uncomfortable.)

Thank you for taking your time to read this message
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Replies

  • Mokey41
    Mokey41 Posts: 5,769 Member
    Why do you need to tell him? Eat what you want, he eats what he wants. As long as you're eating nutritious food it really doesn't matter what anyone else thinks.
  • corgicake
    corgicake Posts: 846 Member
    The rest of the world still remembers that you don't need a slab of animal carcass at every meal. Just say your body tends to feel better on less meat :)
  • Alatariel75
    Alatariel75 Posts: 18,435 Member
    Tell him it helps with your bowels. Then start going into detail until he begs you to stop, or leaves the room. If he brings it up again, rinse and repeat.
  • SiempreBella
    SiempreBella Posts: 125 Member
    Tell him it helps with your bowels. Then start going into detail until he begs you to stop, or leaves the room. If he brings it up again, rinse and repeat.
    this
  • tachma15
    tachma15 Posts: 6 Member
    [UPDATE]

    My father doesn't believe a word I say; he thinks I'm anorexic!! T___T
  • prattiger65
    prattiger65 Posts: 1,657 Member
    [UPDATE]

    My father doesn't believe a word I say; he thinks I'm anorexic!! T___T

    Are you ?
  • tmm_0127
    tmm_0127 Posts: 545 Member
    You're 18, you're an adult. You don't need to tell your dad about your new eating habits. >_>

    * If you're still at home and eating what they eat, do they ask you if you need / want anything from the grocery store? You should make requests, or ask if you can go with them. Just show them that you're making a positive change, not a negative one.
  • iKapuniai
    iKapuniai Posts: 594 Member
    Let him think and say what he wants. Do what you gotta do, and get over your insecurity about what everybody else says/thinks about you. It doesn't matter. Do what's best for you. It's nobody elses business.
  • Briony14
    Briony14 Posts: 52
    Nothing wrong with not eating dead animal! As a kid it only bothered parents if they had to cook separately for me.
  • TeachTheGirl
    TeachTheGirl Posts: 2,091 Member
    How old are you?

    Also, it doesn't matter what kind of things you eat on a day to day basis as long as you're not under or over eating them.
  • MinatoandClover
    MinatoandClover Posts: 160 Member
    I wouldn't bother telling him. In my experience, talking about my diet with unsupportive people makes it all the more difficult to maintain my diet. Is it really important that he knows? Is him knowing worth the backlash you'll receive? If your answer to both of these is "no," I see no reason to tell him.
  • janicelo1971
    janicelo1971 Posts: 823 Member
    [UPDATE]

    My father doesn't believe a word I say; he thinks I'm anorexic!! T___T

    hmmm....at a loss of what to say..not sure why you have to explain your habits to your father or anyone for that matter.......with that being said ED are not joking matter
  • ldrosophila
    ldrosophila Posts: 7,512 Member
    Just curious, and you don't have to answer this, but what is your culture? Sounds like your father is a very strong figure in your family.

    PS-what is a flexitarian?
  • SailorKnightWing
    SailorKnightWing Posts: 875 Member
    I'm assuming she needs to tell her parents because she likely still lives at home and eats the same meals with them.

    Have you considered offering to make dinners some nights? Gives you a bit more control over what you eat.
  • prattiger65
    prattiger65 Posts: 1,657 Member
    I might not always have this opinion, but for some reason, on this one, I am gonna lean toward dad of 18 yo daughter he believes may have an eating disorder. OP, you should ask yourself the question, why doesn't my dad believe anything I say? I have an 18 yo whom I believe anything he says. I also have a 21 yo and I don't believe anything he says. I have reason for both. Something tells me your dad does too.
  • keem88
    keem88 Posts: 1,689 Member
    eat what you want. it's of no concern to him.
    i went vegetarian 11 years ago and my mother had a fit because, animals are here to kill and eat. okay that's nice but i don't want to eat it.
    she gave me so much **** at first, refused to cook anything veggie friendly (i was 14 at the time) and would get mad at my dad when he would get me veggie burgers. she used to try to sneak meat in my food all the time so i just stopped eating what she cooked and would eat cheese sandwiches.
    she finally stopped harassing me over it after she went with me to a chiropractor appointment (he gave me some suppliments, told her my body was all still alligned and that there is nothing wrong with a meatless diet), as well as an appt with my regular doctor (he said the same thing, that i looked healthy as ever, had amazing levels and that as long as i ate dairy and eggs it was fine).
    fast forward now, just saw my doctor a couple months ago. mind you i have also been struggling with recovery from an ed, and have been underweight for some time. yet somehow even though i don't eat meat still and was undereating for so long, all of my blood work came out perfect.

    long story short, who cares what your dad says. don't let him bring you down, ignore his bashing about what you look like and do whatever makes you happy. good luck.
  • tachma15
    tachma15 Posts: 6 Member
    No. Way.

    I've been using My Fitness Pal for over a month now to keep track of how many calories, proteins, sugars, etc. I need each day. So far, I've met the 1,600 calorie-mark, or a little below it (at least 1,500 calories).

    So even with my diet change, I'm always aware of what I need and how much I need to eat. :)
  • tachma15
    tachma15 Posts: 6 Member
    I had to tell him about my new diet because he asked me about it.

    When he found out, he didn't accept it. Soon after, my family became diet-saboteurs.

    Since I want to carry on this diet, I'll just ignore their temptations and complaints. Hopefully I will have a group of friends and supporters by my side. :D
  • tachma15
    tachma15 Posts: 6 Member
    A flexitarian is considered to be a type of vegetarian by some people. Other people don't consider flexitarians to be vegetarians, because we're allowed to eat meat. What makes flexitarians unique is that we try to incorporate more veggies, fruits, dairy, nuts, and wheat in our meals. As for meat, we try not to eat too much of it. (There are some flexitarians that restrict themselves to eating meat twice a week.) I prefer to eat meat with my meals, but in small portions. :D
  • tachma15
    tachma15 Posts: 6 Member
    Thank you for your support, and for sharing your story!
    I hope you continue to eat what you love. :D
  • lambchristie
    lambchristie Posts: 552 Member
    Since a flexitarian is someone who sometimes does eat meat and mostly eats fruits and vegges; it seems odd he'd say anything.

    You are 18 and probably still live at home; so it would be hard to stand up to a parent. Some have suggested you just go about your business, but I suggest you do your best to honor your parent(s) and still eat the 'flexitarian' lifestyle without telling him that is what you're doing.

    Your profile doesn't say anything other than you are female and 18 years old.
    If you are on a weight loss journey ... good for you that you see at such an early age you need to make a change.
    You mentioned anorexia, that your dad thought you were struggling with this, are you? If yes, please get medical help.
    What about your mom? What does she say?
    Are you making your own meals or expecting mom (or whoever cooks) to make you something different?

    There are so many unanswered questions for your brief posts.
  • lawkat
    lawkat Posts: 538 Member
    I don't understand the problem. You still eat meat, just not as often. What is so hard with saying "no thank you" if someone asks if you want meat. You aren't a vegetarian, vegan or pescetarian. All you do is limit your meat, poultry and fish intake. Pretty much you are an omnivore, like him.

    Being selective in what you eat can also be considered an eating disorder. Why would he say you are becoming anorexic? Are you too thin? Maybe he has a valid point if you are getting too picky in what you will and won't eat.
  • onwarddownward
    onwarddownward Posts: 1,683 Member
    I'd start by telling them that you have cancer and you're becoming a transsexual but are going to do the surgery yourself.

    After they have recovered from that, telling them you've changed your eating habits should be a piece of cake.

    You do eat cake, don't you?
  • JoRocka
    JoRocka Posts: 17,525 Member
    BAWHHAHAHHHA^ what she said


    past that- this is my thought:

    eat what you want... how much of it you want and why you want.

    You don't need to explain yourself to him or anyone.

    And why the hell do we have a new name for EVERYTHING?

    What in gods green earth is Flexitarian anyway?

    wait- don't answer that- I'll google.
  • Sewweaver
    Sewweaver Posts: 33 Member
    I might not always have this opinion, but for some reason, on this one, I am gonna lean toward dad of 18 yo daughter he believes may have an eating disorder. OP, you should ask yourself the question, why doesn't my dad believe anything I say? I have an 18 yo whom I believe anything he says. I also have a 21 yo and I don't believe anything he says. I have reason for both. Something tells me your dad does too.

    This..... exactly
  • Sewweaver
    Sewweaver Posts: 33 Member
    I'd start by telling them that you have cancer and you're becoming a transsexual but are going to do the surgery yourself.

    After they have recovered from that, telling them you've changed your eating habits should be a piece of cake.

    You do eat cake, don't you?

    most. awesome. answer.... EVER
  • Jmchao
    Jmchao Posts: 27 Member
    Who prepares the meals in the house? If it's your mother or father, why not try offering to make a few meals a week? That way, you can prepare what you know you will eat and possibly introduce them to something new/different also. If they question it, let them know you are preparing for when you are out on your own. Why not practice while you are home with them and can ask them questions about meal preparations? They may appreciate helping you continue to grow in your independence and may appreciate the extra help.

    If they still give you grief, simply let them know you feel better eating this way and you have more energy. You're trying to get a hang of eating on your own for when the day comes and you are living on your own.

    Otherwise, you are an adult-act like one. Simply thank your father for his concern and assure him you are eating a healthy, well-balanced diet. Disregard anything else he says (unless there is truth behind something he says) and repeat your mantra, "Thank you for your concern, Dad. But I really do feel better and I am eating a healthy, well-balanced diet." Eventually, he will run out of things to say.
  • mommy3457
    mommy3457 Posts: 361 Member
    I get where you are coming from. Just say you are trying something new. Most of the world does not eat meat with every meal. In fact, we are blessed to be able to. So, you could tell him that too. Don't let what your dad says get you down. :smile:
  • toothpastechica
    toothpastechica Posts: 250 Member
    so a flexitarian is a normal person who doesn't eat a ton of meat...or its someone who is just a picky eater and needs a fancy name for it to excuse their under eating? I'm still confused. I was vegetarian for years and now incorporate some meat (still no red meat and no pork), but I don't go around telling people I am something else...I just say,"I don't eat red meat" when it comes up....it seems rather complicated to try and explain to people (ie your dad) why you are being picky when you could just say "no thanks, trying to eat better"
  • jackiecamarena
    jackiecamarena Posts: 290 Member
    so a flexitarian is a normal person who doesn't eat a ton of meat...or its someone who is just a picky eater and needs a fancy name for it to excuse their under eating? I'm still confused... you could just say "no thanks, trying to eat better"

    My thoughts exactly. Don't understand what the big deal is.

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