Depressed, why is my body starving myself?

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workoutgirl23
workoutgirl23 Posts: 267
in Health and Weight Loss
My husband is gone for military training right now. He sent me a text message a week ago, that said he wanted a divorce and to separate. That he wasn't happy. I am very severely depressed now. and I have not been able to eat at all. I am practically starving myself. i don't mean too. i just have no drive to eat, because i am so severely depressed. and every time i try to force myself to eat something small, i feel very nauseous and almost throw up everything i try to eat. why is this happening. i usually love food. but now with how depressed i am, i just can't eat no matter what. i don't crave any thing. and since i'm not eating i'm getting very weak feeling. shaking bad, and feeling like i'm about to pass out all the time. its scaring me. i don't feel like i can control it right now. whatever i try to force myself to eat per day, is only equaling up to about no more than 300 calories or so per day. it can't be healthy. i just can't help it. my body doesn't want to eat.

Replies

  • grimendale
    grimendale Posts: 2,153 Member
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    At a guess, I'd say it's psychosomatic. You're upset and refusing food even though your brain knows it needs it. I would consult with a grief counselor or a therapist about this. Talking to a professional is going to be the best advice I can offer.
  • astartig
    astartig Posts: 549 Member
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    At a guess, I'd say it's psychosomatic. You're upset and refusing food even though your brain knows it needs it. I would consult with a grief counselor or a therapist about this. Talking to a professional is going to be the best advice I can offer.

    ^this

    try broth and toast ,chicken soup.. things you'd force down wiht the flu in the mean time. you need some sustenance. you could start with your Gp. they can give you some pills to ease the initial shock I think.
  • gogoboobzilla
    gogoboobzilla Posts: 91 Member
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    At a guess, I'd say it's psychosomatic. You're upset and refusing food even though your brain knows it needs it. I would consult with a grief counselor or a therapist about this. Talking to a professional is going to be the best advice I can offer.

    I second this.
    You sound positively devastated (understandably so). You were left in one of the worst ways (a text message) and he's gone so you can't even talk about it in person to get any closure. Definitely see a professional, hopefully they can help get you to a place where you can eat least eat again. Good luck.
  • hailzp
    hailzp Posts: 903 Member
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    Go talk to someone.
  • Mcgrawhaha
    Mcgrawhaha Posts: 1,596 Member
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    how about some good nutrient dense ideas? something high in protein??? tasty??? try a peanut butter banana smoothie. that's got good protein in it, potassium, calcium... use some milk / almond milk... 2 frozen bananas and scoop of peanut butter! (use extra peanut butter if you need more calories!) that should give you a good chunk of calories and help you feel a little better!
  • aquarabbit
    aquarabbit Posts: 1,622 Member
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    That's horrible! Very unfair to you. I agree that talking to a professional would be the best thing. I think that you need to find a way to get over this mentally first and foremost. For now, do that absolute best you can as far as food. Try to think about the energy you need for your kids. That might help you get a bit more down. These wounds will take time to heal, but they will heal. Grieving this kind of loss is (in my opinion) an important part of moving on, but getting a little extra help in that process can only make it easier. I'm so sorry hon! Just take it one day at a time.
  • LongIsland27itl
    LongIsland27itl Posts: 365 Member
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    Your body s not starving yourself, your brain is.
    It can be fixed the same way some people keep eating when they are not hungry. Even though you don't want food at all, you could slap a blob of peanut butter between some bread, with a big glass of milk. That can be 500 calories right there.
    Anyways, I'm really sorry about your situation, it sucks and sounds terrible, but you have to be strong for your kids, and yourself. At least you have them. If you don't get out of this depression soon you should seek counseling like the others suggested.
  • determinedbutlazy
    determinedbutlazy Posts: 1,941 Member
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    Go talk to someone. I don't eat when I'm really depressed and it can make it worse (hormones off balance from not eating etc) so you should speak to someone and try to rise above. I am terribly sorry, though, maybe your husband is just under a lot of stress in his deployment? I think he should have manned up and said it to your face when he came home.
  • Embee_2311
    Embee_2311 Posts: 47
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    I am sorry something so terrible has happened to you. Please make an effort to take the suggestions people have made as it is all sound advice. Also consider taking a ready-made protein supplement and some fruit juice to sip on throughout the day then have some nuts nearby to chew on also throughout the day.

    Take care of yourself, dear, your kids need you to make it through this tough time.:flowerforyou:
  • likearadiowave
    likearadiowave Posts: 445 Member
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    he told you he wanted a divorce in a text message? i'm well aware he obviously couldn't do it in person ... but wow, **** move.
  • cmriverside
    cmriverside Posts: 34,080 Member
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    he told you he wanted a divorce in a text message? i'm well aware he obviously couldn't do it in person ... but wow, **** move.

    She just posted another thread saying he calls her fat, what should she do?

    uh. :huh:
  • YaGigi
    YaGigi Posts: 817 Member
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    All people react different about food while in stress. During my first divorce I lost lots of weight, was skinny like a runway model,
    Last year my sister went missing and was found dead weeks later, and I was eating for 3 people. I guess it was my way to feel alive.
  • MyChocolateDiet
    MyChocolateDiet Posts: 22,281 Member
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    All people react different about food while in stress. During my first divorce I lost lots of weight, was skinny like a runway model,
    Last year my sister went missing and was found dead weeks later, and I was eating for 3 people. I guess it was my way to feel alive.

    Aw. I'm sorry. :flowerforyou:
  • WestCoastJo82
    WestCoastJo82 Posts: 2,304 Member
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    When I got divorced I had the same problem eating - and I was the one who initiated the process. For me, I just had to force myself to try to eat small bits throughout the day. Sorry, but there was no way I was going to chug down a whole smoothie or sandwich no matter how tasty. Pretty sure it would have come back up if I had forced it. But, I could eat a couple bites of yogurt, and then a handful of nuts an hour later, and an apple an hour after that, etc. Also, see a therapist. Once I felt like I was not whirling out of control, I was able to eat normally.
    Good luck to you!
  • ILiftHeavyAcrylics
    ILiftHeavyAcrylics Posts: 27,732 Member
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    I'd strongly urge you to call Military Onesource, go in and talk to someone. They offer free counseling services and they'll do it over the phone or online if you don't want to go in.

    http://www.militaryonesource.mil/

    As for eating, try eating the things you would have if you were ill. Go easy on yourself and hugs to you. :flowerforyou:
  • YaGigi
    YaGigi Posts: 817 Member
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    All people react different about food while in stress. During my first divorce I lost lots of weight, was skinny like a runway model,
    Last year my sister went missing and was found dead weeks later, and I was eating for 3 people. I guess it was my way to feel alive.

    Aw. I'm sorry. :flowerforyou:

    Thanks hon I'm good now.
    But with extra 30 pounds.
  • herblackwings39
    herblackwings39 Posts: 3,930 Member
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    Try to find a support group or therapist to talk to. Divorce can be a stressful thing when it's a mutual decision. When you're blind sided by it can be worse. Your best bet is going to be counselling to begin working through it.

    You might try drinking your calories if you're unable to eat solid food without feeling ill. Make higher calorie drinks, take your vitamins, but get help dealing with the emotions behind this.

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